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compendium of crackpot theories


41 replies to this topic

#1 Martin RR George

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Posted 12 July 2014 - 10:24 PM

Why am I doing this? Well because we are now past the point where someone compile a list of the most stupid but hilarious crackpot theories to date (and I have a lot of free time on my hand perhaps).This collection contains gems from this forum, reddit and a lot of sources

1.Benjen stark is behind the woes of statk family
2. Daenerys's entire storyline is her hallucination
3. Eddard and ned stark are two different people, one is dead and the other in hiding plotting revenge
4. Mance is rhaegar, ashara is lemore, taena is elia ,maester aemon was aerys in hiding
5.Balon is alive ,in hiding and in league with euron
6. Jon snow is aegon 6 , aegon is ned stark's bastard and gerold dayne is also a Targaryen bastard (jon's twin apparently). It gets worse:the aegon we were introduced with is illyrio's son and aegon stark is yet to be introduced)
7. Varys is serra mopatis
8. Hodor is undercover other keeping an eye on bran.
9. Others built a wall to keep stannis baratheon away

Feel free to make your own contributions to this list

#2 willofDorne

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Posted 12 July 2014 - 10:52 PM

#9 doesn't make any sense... because nothing can stop Stannis the Mannis.



#3 not in the face

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Posted 12 July 2014 - 10:57 PM

#9 doesn't make any sense... because nothing can stop Stannis the Mannis.

Also because it is true.



#4 lyannaisalive

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Posted 12 July 2014 - 11:09 PM

1. Roose is a vampire

 

2. Varys is really a women and fAegon is the child of varys and illyrio



#5 LordStoneheart

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Posted 12 July 2014 - 11:18 PM

Asha is a Man

 

Tyrion and Penny Breed a Race of Dwarves

 

Eurio Greyharis

 

Tywin is a Good Person (the very definition of crackpot)

 

Aerys Molested Tywin (more likely than the above theory)



#6 lyannaisalive

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Posted 12 July 2014 - 11:26 PM

Asha is a Man

 

Tyrion and Penny Breed a Race of Dwarves

 

Eurio Greyharis

 

Tywin is a Good Person (the very definition of crackpot)

 

Aerys Molested Tywin (more likely than the above theory)

'

When I first read that Tyrion and Penny theory I couldn't stop laughing for hours and then after laughing I started to think that it had better come true  :cheers:



#7 willofDorne

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Posted 12 July 2014 - 11:30 PM

'

When I first read that Tyrion and Penny theory I couldn't stop laughing for hours and then after laughing I started to think that it had better come true  :cheers:

Kind of scary that he could own Casterly Rock, the best gold mine in Westeros? *sigh*

 

However, I think he'd be more likely to support Penny and turn it into... I'm so sorry, a theme park.



#8 lyannaisalive

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Posted 12 July 2014 - 11:43 PM

Kind of scary that he could own Casterly Rock, the best gold mine in Westeros? *sigh*

 

However, I think he'd be more likely to support Penny and turn it into... I'm so sorry, a theme park.

 didnt the casterly rocks gold mines run dry?



#9 LordStoneheart

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Posted 12 July 2014 - 11:46 PM

 didnt the casterly rocks gold mines run dry?

 

That was show only, and I was under the impression from Elio and Linda that this was completely false.



#10 willofDorne

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Posted 13 July 2014 - 12:01 AM

Did you read my "Jon Snow Master Plan" of Jon glamouring as Bowen who's glamouring as Tormund who's glamouring as Jon Snow but unknowningly gets stabbed? (Or something to that effect, who knows)

 

http://asoiaf.wester...ic-and-mystery/

 

Every time I read it, it gets more interesting. And I'm the one who wrote it, lol.



#11 jon Rhaegar stark

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Posted 13 July 2014 - 12:07 AM

 

That was show only, and I was under the impression from Elio and Linda that this was completely false.

yes i also think it was from the show only ...we never hear about that in books do we

 

Danny is daughter of Ser Bonifer and Rhaella  and Davos is son of Ser Bonifer and RHaella ..

 

i  dont know which one gets the first place  


Edited by jon Rhaegar stark, 13 July 2014 - 12:09 AM.


#12 Kienn

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Posted 13 July 2014 - 12:17 AM

 

That was show only, and I was under the impression from Elio and Linda that this was completely false.

 

Do you really need Elio to tell you something like that is completely ridiculous?



#13 LordStoneheart

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Posted 13 July 2014 - 12:20 AM

 
Do you really need Elio to tell you something like that is completely ridiculous?


No, it just makes the case stronger. Trust me, I was part of the collective eye roll when that scene aired.

#14 JonCon's Red Beard

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Posted 13 July 2014 - 12:24 AM

Benjen is Daario
Mance is Rhaegar

#15 Winds of Winter blow cold

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Posted 13 July 2014 - 12:34 AM

Why am I doing this? Well because we are now past the point where someone compile a list of the most stupid but hilarious crackpot theories to date (and I have a lot of free time on my hand perhaps).This collection contains gems from this forum, reddit and a lot of sources

1.Benjen stark is behind the woes of statk family
2. Daenerys's entire storyline is her hallucination
3. Eddard and ned stark are two different people, one is dead and the other in hiding plotting revenge
4. Mance is rhaegar, ashara is NOT lemore, taena is elia ,maester aemon was aerys in hiding
5.Balon is alive ,in hiding and in league with euron
6. Jon snow is aegon 6 , aegon is ned stark's bastard and gerold dayne is also a Targaryen bastard (jon's twin apparently). It gets worse:the aegon we were introduced with is illyrio's son and aegon stark is yet to be introduced)
7. Varys is serra mopatis
8. Hodor is undercover other keeping an eye on bran.
9. Others built a wall to keep stannis baratheon away

Feel free to make your own contributions to this list

Fixed.



#16 Lady Wylla Manderly

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Posted 13 July 2014 - 12:34 AM

1. Roose is a vampire

 

2. Varys is really a women and fAegon is the child of varys and illyrio

 

I've also seen a "Coldhands is actually a vampire" one on another website.



#17 Merengues

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Posted 13 July 2014 - 01:19 AM

One of the craziest I've read here was the dusky woman is truly Euron who turned into his brother's sex slave just for the lulz of watching Vic's jaw drop and make a hole all the way to Westeros after he finds out that his brother's gifts are truly tainted.

Also the theories that every dead guy is truly just hiding in waiting to reveal him or herself as a secret Targ.

 



#18 JonCon's Red Beard

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Posted 13 July 2014 - 01:20 AM

Jyana Reed being actually Lyanna is very very crackpot.

#19 Martin RR George

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Posted 13 July 2014 - 06:16 AM

http://asoiaf.wester...view=getnewpost

And I submit this nominee. In all fairness it is a joke thread

#20 JoeyBanana

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Posted 13 July 2014 - 06:21 AM

Roose Bolton will wear "Jon's skin" and save the world as LC of the Night's Watch and become King In the North.

 

My personal crackpot theory.