FaceGardener Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 "Davos remembered too well the living shadow that had squirmed from out her womb that night beneath Storm's End, its black hands pressing at her thighs. I must go carefully here, or some shadow may come seeking me as well. "Even an onion smuggler knows two onions from three. You are short a king, my lady." Stannis gave a snort of laughter. "He has you there lady. Two is not three.""--A Storm of Swords, Davos 5 Stannis LAUGHED. And as we well know, Stannis never laughs. Thus we can safely assume that he is being warged by Jaqen H'Gar, who is using him to bring about the dragon apocalypse in league with the Warlocks of Qarth and the ghost of Rhaegar Targaryen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rhaegal Targaryen Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 Stannis is Euron who is Daario who is Rhaegar who is Mance who is Ramsay who is Dany. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mikkel Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 I wish this was the most absurd theory I'd read lately. Unfortunately, it isn't. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fuem Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 I wish this was the most absurd theory I'd read lately. Unfortunately, it isn't. Lmao Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
How I Met Your Hodor Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 Jaqen can warg into things now? And he's Syrio? And the guy who killed Balon? And he's also Stannis? And he's the dusky woman who is also Euron, who's Daario, who's Gerion, who's Benjen, who's Tywin, who's Rhaegar? Wow... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mikkel Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 Jaqen can warg into things now? And he's Syrio? And the guy who killed Balon? And he's also Stannis? And he's the dusky woman who is also Euron, who's Daario, who's Gerion, who's Benjen, who's Tywin, who's Rhaegar? Wow... Yeah, but, like it all makes sense, maaan. :smoking: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ser Charles of Rosehaven Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 Maybe thats why half of tormunds member was cut. It may be that r'hllor took it for a king Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jon's Queen Consort Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 0/10; Not a good troll thread; not even remotely funny and entertaining. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fanless Mace Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 I'm pretty sure there ate only three people in all of Planetos:Daario/Euron/Syrio/Stannis/Jaequen/Mel/DogNed Stark (who is clearly not dead)HotpieThe rest are Hotpie hallucinations...he ate WAY too much chili con carne last night. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fanless Mace Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 0/10; Not a good troll thread; not even remotely funny and entertaining.I give that review a 1/10. No originality and it lacks snark. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jon's Queen Consort Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 I give that review a 1/10. No originality and it lacks snark. If by snark you mean the lack of Hodor, Syrio, Hot Pie, Daario, Jaqen references then thank you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fanless Mace Posted September 21, 2014 Share Posted September 21, 2014 If by snark you mean the lack of Hodor, Syrio, Hot Pie, Daario, Jaqen references then thank you!That's better...on the right track at least. ;-) Throw in a Where Whores Go reference and you're there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ser Charles of Rosehaven Posted September 22, 2014 Share Posted September 22, 2014 I wish this was the most absurd theory I'd read lately. Unfortunately, it isn't. This means you have read mine about tyrion being half of tormunds member? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tywin Lannister_ Posted September 22, 2014 Share Posted September 22, 2014 I'm pretty sure there ate only three people in all of Planetos:Daario/Euron/Syrio/Stannis/Jaequen/Mel/DogNed Stark (who is clearly not dead)HotpieThe rest are Hotpie hallucinations...he ate WAY too much chili con carne last night.You forgot one thing. Hotpie is secretly Tywin Lannister whom is secretly a Targ that is secretly GRRM whom is secretly Obama. Hotpiecare has a much better ring to it, anyway. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Squire to Ser Pounce Posted September 22, 2014 Share Posted September 22, 2014 You forgot one thing. Hotpie is secretly Tywin Lannister whom is secretly a Targ that is secretly GRRM whom is secretly Obama.Hotpiecare has a much better ring to it, anyway. The Iron Throne is way, waaaay in debt? Thanks, Hot Pie! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FaceGardener Posted September 22, 2014 Author Share Posted September 22, 2014 The Iron Throne is way, waaaay in debt? Thanks, Hot Pie! I think this might be the best response to any criticism of anything ever. "Gods dammit Edmure, I didn't want you to hold the ford!" "Thanks, HOT PIE" "Recent reports that the Hand of the King was murdered while on the privy by his emotionally and vertically challenged son" "Thanks, HOT PIE" "Our reports indicate that the self-styled Mother of Dragons has gone bald and fled the city after an incident involving the re-opening of Meereen's fighting pits" "Thaaaaaaanks, HOOOOOOT PIIIIIIIIE" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ser Greg of House House Posted September 22, 2014 Share Posted September 22, 2014 A "snort of laughter" is not a smile. Not funny. Next. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FaceGardener Posted September 22, 2014 Author Share Posted September 22, 2014 A "snort of laughter" is not a smile. Not funny. Next. I HOPE SOMEONE POOPS IN YOUR MOUTH PS thanks everyone else for being fun Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Squire to Ser Pounce Posted September 22, 2014 Share Posted September 22, 2014 I HOPE SOMEONE POOPS IN YOUR MOUTH Thanks, Hot Pie! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FaceGardener Posted September 22, 2014 Author Share Posted September 22, 2014 Thanks, Hot Pie! You are my new favorite person ever. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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