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First of My Name Posted May 6, 2015 Author Share Posted May 6, 2015 for Volume 40: Benjamin studied YoYo-ing at Carcosa with professor Yo-yo, who only yo-yo'd when yodeling. Yoko One went to Benjamin, hoping antidisestablishmentarianism was prolapsed with moistened towelettes, engulfing reality in David Hasselhoff. Screams sundered the osmos when Queen Errr mistakenly texted Bieber, repeatedly telling jokes about Beber's small talent. Bieber retaliated without dignity or ethics. Drunk communists began shaving smiley-faces. Nigel Farage had always been reaving. Strange sounds permeated every office cubicle. Suddenly, enormous pink orifices imploded like violently imploding offices. Pink flamingos dred the blue lions. Tickets for Wimbledon are worth 10 rubber penises. Rhaegar always spouts Rhaegar-ish Rhaegarisms, Rhaegarily strumming Jon's favorite weapon eratically. Somewhere, Benjamin wished Rhaegar would fight Hillary Clinton while Elia swore to R'hllor that Buckcherry is going to remember remember REMEMBER! Somewhere, Rhaegar ran valiantly until several million Chamillionaires emerged from the ether. They couldn't buy piccolo, therefore they seppuku'd themselves. Wearing nothing except spandex doublets, leather undergarments, and turnips made Sergeant Pepper slightly dizzy, obviously. Just under Rhaegar's nose, bountiful bouquets scattered Rhaegar's thoughts about bowchikawowow and roast-beef. Rhaegar raised his favorite Manatee named Molly McMugglesmuggler. Molly McMugglesmuggler nodded affirmatively toward Timbuktu, swearing faithfully that Brussel's sprouts would avenge her honor. But rutabagas exploded before the warriors could begin their mighty posturing. Viscount Valentine insisted sheepishly that all lovers should wear socks, but Samwise Gamgee refused. When Queen Errr came bodaciously bedazzled, Nigel the Dragon flew across endless skies. Stannis moaned about hazardous Sith lightning and enacted strict protocols apparantly designed with insidious chefs in mind. Righteous yesterday made tomorrow a frightening proposition for Benjamin, so he took several beanie babies and pretended they had magical powers. Once everyone had calmed down, eventually a town meeting was held to lambate hamsters. The hamsters responded by bombarding with blueberries. Professor Yo-Yo shocked Stannis when tap-dancing all over his head. Stannis smelled fear germinating within his left nut, causing Professor Yo-Yo unspecified nightmares. Having basted repeatedly, Stannis was flabbergasted. He couldn't resist nut-fear, so he journeyed to Volantis, where Melisandre burned everyone slightly. Being singed and smelly, Tyrion wallowed in hummus for shits and giggles. Creepy doll-monsters sang Amazing Grace off-key while fire ants feasted on fried chicken. This gave insecticide new disadvantages but also many kettles overflowed into the wetlands. Millions suffered needlessly during the festival of pubic hair. Consequently, shaving cream filled orifices, which were displayed proudly amidst national monuments to shaved rhesus monkeys. Unfortunately, mandatory voting for Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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