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Amusing game review site


Werthead

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I love the Medal of Honour: Airborne review:

The Medal of Honour series has been going on since 1999, meaning it's actually been going for longer than the Second World War did. And if you put together all the games, TV shows and movies that depicted it, the Normandy landings alone probably lasted somewhere in the region of six months.

You're all-American, apple-pie-shitting, bullet-magnet 'Boyd Travers', a paratrooper who has somehow been transported into an alternate universe where the Axis forces were Saturday morning cartoon villains and everyone else is a colossal moron. The gimmick this time is that you get parachuted in at the start of each level and get to choose your starting position, but there are usually no more than one or two safe drop points close together and everywhere else is a highway to Nazi bullet bum-rape.

I'm no historian but I'm pretty sure there wasn't an elite branch of stormtroopers who worse gasmasks, wielded miniguns and could take three sniper bullets to the forehead before dying and I'm pretty sure the Nazis didn't have a giant armoured concrete tower than can only be described as a Doom Fortress. By the end of the game I wouldn't have been surprised if Hitler had appeared riding a giant robot spider.

I only played the single-player so maybe the multiplayer game is better but they'd need to teleport whores into the room before I'd start caring.

The cynicism is a bit wearing after a while (does he actually like any games?) but it's all amusing and some of the animations are quite cool.

EDIT: The Orange Box review is also awesome:

Introducing a new NPC at this late stage whom everyone has supposedly known all along is a bit like coming home to find a walrus at the dinner table but you're only one who's noticed.
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Hehe, this is Zero Punctuation, right?

I discovered it a few weeks ago and it was making me laugh out loud at work.

Try his review for Pyschonauts, Wert. He loves it and he loves Portal too.

from the MoH review "Historical Accuracy is only of interest to British people and Fags"

There was another one about tits and violence that I've forgotten now, but was awesome.

Great stuff :D

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:rofl:

That site is absolutely amazing. I can now screen my games for "Bourgeois bias" and "Capitalistic Terrorism" before buying them.

ETA: I read their EU2 review, which was absolutely hilarious. 4 paragraphs spent talking about the game combined with 10 talking about other things.

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Do check out his personal site too, www.fullyramblomatic.com - it's all awesome, Yahtzee's been my favourite internet writer for years now.

Yeah, for those who like his current stuff be sure to go to this old site and look at the Fable review. A bit more primitive than his recent stuff but oh so true.

Easily the best reviewer on the web. I just wish he'd do more of them.

And maybe movies too.

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Yeah, for those who like his current stuff be sure to go to this old site and look at the Fable review. A bit more primitive than his recent stuff but oh so true.

He's got a whole shit-ton of written stuff that he's done over the years too, as well as comics and games, all well worth checking out.

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Introducing a new NPC at this late stage whom everyone has supposedly known all along is a bit like coming home to find a walrus at the dinner table but you're only one who's noticed.

Suddenly the "More Potatoes, Uncle Tusky?" Livejournal avatar a friend of mine is using makes more sense...

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Tabula Rasa review = awesome.

"Removing the grind from MMORPGS makes as much sense as removing the crazy from Richard Garriott."

Love the Psychonauts review. Especially the correlation of the decline of adventure game popularity coinciding with the rise of Jim Carey's popularity proving that the world suddenly became a lot more stupid in the late 1990s. Hard to argue with that.

"It's all kind of like if Tim Burton knocked up David Lynch in Willy Wonka's chocolate factory and he did meth right up to the birth. Psychonauts seems like quite a polarising game, with some people thinking it's the kind of game Jesus would make if he was alive and not a pussy whilst others feel it's a chunky vomit-milkshake severely overhyped by those in Party A."

I also like him saying, "Remember when games were fun and not a second job?" whilst flashing up a pic of World of WarCraft. QFT. And his suggestion that grown men avoid games with brightly-coloured graphics for "fear of catching the gay."

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