203 replies to this topic

[Gilead]

Is this guy "known"?

I'm always looking for new shit to read and I was rifling through Amazon when I noticed a fantasy author I'd never heard of - Robert Stanek. I usually get new suggestions from legitimate review sites so I was surprised I'd found someone so apparently highly rated that I'd never seen discussed. Usually quickly looking at Amazon's star rating system is a somewhat rough way to gauge book quality. The Kingdoms and the Elves of the Reaches had 4 1/2 stars so I assumed it had to be at least somewhat decent despite its ridiculous title.

This book is poisonous. I read a few dozen pages, now I think I might be dying.

It's the ramblings of an 8th grader, and not a particularly bright one. The writing is peppered with grammatical errors and the story itself is one loosely-formed ball of clichés rolled around in shit.

In a PTSD haze I went back to look at the listing and there were a bunch of 1 star reviews talking about how all of the glowing reviews were alternate personalities of Robert Stanek praising himself - some bizarre masturbatory self-promotion scam. I didn't even look at the actual content of the reviews originally; I guess I just assumed no one would be that much of a fuckface. I was an expensive lesson to learn, but now whenever I buy something from an unknown I suppose I'll have to err on the side of caution and do background checks on the author to make sure he isn't a deceptive nutjob.

I never post in forums, and I never read anything here that isn't directly related to ASoIaF, but in the off chance that someone else finds this while looking up Robert Stanek to make sure he's legit - he isn't, and he can't write.

Robert Stanek shat directly into my soul.

[Grendalen]

Did... did you pay for this with actual currency?

Please, take a look at this thread.

[The Pita Enigma]

Hee.
Stanek pimps his own books, from what I understood. He's kind of horrible. You should ask the forum before you make a purchase, foo'.

[Seli]

Always read some negative reviews, they should give you a view why people do not recommend a book and you can decide afterwards if their arguments make sense to you.
Stanek has a.... reputation to say the least, sorry you spent the money.

[pat5150]

Ah man, can't believe you actually fell for this scam. . . Stanek's situation has been pretty well-documented, methinks.

Hopefully you didn't spend to much money on this trash. . .

Patrick

[Tormund Midgetsbane]

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.


Seriously. If you want some real fantasy, you should go pick up some Terry Goodkind.

[Poobah]

Don't be mean Tormund.

[Horza]

Ouch.

[Mad Monkey]

I also recommend reading some of George R.R. Martin's books. While Fevre Dream and the Dreamsongs books are always brilliant, I really recommend taking a look at the Song of Ice and Fire series. You can start with A Game of Thrones. It's not as famous as the others that I mentioned but many people seem to like it.

[AverageGuy]

Gilead, on 20 March 2010 - 01:41 AM, said:

Is this guy "known"?

Yes, though generally he's "known" unfavorably. But hey, look at it this way. At least it wasn't The Eye of Argon.

[Nerdanel]

The Eye of Argon is so bad it's good. I've not heard the same said of Stanek who appears to be so bad he's really bad.

[Poobah]

Nerdanel, on 20 March 2010 - 11:19 AM, said:

I've not heard the same said of Stanek who appears to be so bad he's really bad.

He's worse.

[Bastard of Godsgrace]

This surely is one of the most memorable thread titles I only hope we won't get summon author from this

[Ser_not_appearing_yet]

Mad Monkey, on 20 March 2010 - 10:11 AM, said:

I also recommend reading some of George R.R. Martin's books. While Fevre Dream and the Dreamsongs books are always brilliant, I really recommend taking a look at the Song of Ice and Fire series. You can start with A Game of Thrones. It's not as famous as the others that I mentioned but many people seem to like it.

Way overrated imo.

I suggest giving Stanek another go. Maybe get his audio set, the sound of his voice really adds some much-needed weight to the multiple literary themes Stanek specialises in.

[Happy Ent]

Do Stanek’s female characters have agency?

[Happy Ent]

Bastard of Godsgrace, on 20 March 2010 - 12:36 PM, said:

This surely is one of the most memorable thread titles I only hope we won't get summon author from this

Thanks to the high page rank of westeros.org you can now do this: Google Where does Robert Stanek shit?

[BookWyrm]

Ser_not_appearing_yet, on 20 March 2010 - 12:43 PM, said:

Way overrated imo.

I suggest giving Stanek another go. Maybe get his audio set, the sound of his voice really adds some much-needed weight to the multiple literary themes Stanek specialises in.

By far the most intelligent thing said in this thread.

I would recommend everyone try Stanek, but, like Gene Wolfe there's a certain level of intelligence needed to appreciate his work. Perhaps a reread is in order for the OP?

Stanek shits gold for real (suck it Tywin) and Gilead's lucky to have the honor of assimilating his cleveland steamer.

Now I think the mods should close this thread because some of the comments are bordering harassment and if they don't then I might sue.

[Ser_not_appearing_yet]

Here's the audio sample I mentioned btw. I suggest checking out the stuff narrated by Stanek himself for the full experience. His voice really does bring the magic of ruin mist alive. Seriously aweinspiring stuff imo.

Edited by Ser_not_appearing_yet, 20 March 2010 - 01:09 PM.

[TrueMetis]

Happy Ent, on 20 March 2010 - 01:04 PM, said:

Thanks to the high page rank of westeros.org you can now do this: Google Where does Robert Stanek shit?

That is awesome.

Oh and for those saying to re-read Stanek, that's just not funny there are some things you don't joke about.

Edited by Comrade Silent-Stalker, 20 March 2010 - 02:08 PM.

[Tormund Midgetsbane]

Ser_not_appearing_yet, on 20 March 2010 - 01:09 PM, said:

Here's the audio sample I mentioned btw. I suggest checking out the stuff narrated by Stanek himself for the full experience. His voice really does bring the magic of ruin mist alive. Seriously aweinspiring stuff imo.

Haha, there are 2 Robert Stanek books on that page, listed as narrated by 2 different people. Both are clearly Stanek.

Seriously though. Wizards First Rule. Do it.