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The Dumbest Status Presently On Your Facebook News Feed


Mack Kilimaro

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Its strange. I've noticed ladies fashion has gone quite militaristic. Saw a newsreader, a couple of weeks ago, in a grey-grey-blue jacket. She was one stahlhelm away from a Prince Harry gaff.

I wonder if I could get away with it? Would it be cross-dressing? How far back does army surplus go? Does this mean we can put women on the front... line?

I really want to know what was going through my friends brain when he was posting this

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News feed isn't too bad today. Mostly updates from friends who live locally bitching about the heat (it really is freaking hot here right now, but it has been for a while. suck it up. ok, I bitched about my giant bag of peanut butter m&ms melting into a giant mass, but that was more from the shock of digging into a bag of hot, tiny peanut butter explosions) and/or worrying about Hurricane Earl (it's supposed to hit us Friday night/Saturday morning).

I have used the hide feature on people who update their status numerous times a day with really inane comments or just TMI. I hate that. I even unfriended one person because of it.

I wish you could hide those 'Likes' updates like you can with applications. That would be awesome.

The thing I hate the most is the constant stream of youtube videos. Some days that's all my feed really is. Some friends like to post three or four in a row. I've resisted the urge to comment on it in my status, because I'll probably end up sounding like a bitch. The day is coming tho. I can feel it.

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I also don't mind the music vids & lyrics much... just because they usually are a shared interest between us and not some fake emo thing. so that's cool by me.

One of the worst things I have ever seen on FB was very early this morning--not quite a status, but it was all over my newsfeed. A friend of mine (again, not someone that would be here) had a whole string of naked photos of a woman on her page. Apparently my friends friend had an ex-husband who was posting naked photos of this poor woman all over FB to all his ex-wife's friends list. they were hugely graphic. I don't know the woman but I sure felt sorry for her.

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A friend by no means, this acquaintance added me and I haven't had the heart to hide him yet, just because most of his statuses make me burst out laughing. I hope you see why......

May George W. Bush drink the blood of the Iraqis

The lack of patriotism and true allegiance with the Homeland is synonymous with treason

Fresh kills...

Humanity has this idea that the universe behaves accordingly with logic and the "laws" that their wisemen defined. They seem to forget that it was not them who created the universe, but that these "laws" are merely a limited perception to what is in actuality an everchanging universe of chaos. The unlimited can not be defined by the limited...

Desecration of the Flag is a sin deserving of public execution.

Is it because I'm Canadian? or is all of this hilarious to anyone else... :)

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I'm 'friends' with a young adult female that I know from World of Warcraft. 90% of her status updates are passive agressive rants about her boyfriend. They range from schmoopsy miss you ones to I hate you and want you to burn in hell ones.

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Ahh yes, as far as today's statuses go...

my favourite would have to be: "Drove the tractor to the bar today" :)

and the one that pisses me off the most would be: "God does not ask you to die to who you truly are, but to die to who you are not." :tantrum: keep. it. to. your. self.

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Yea, Facebook. Another love/hate relationship in my life. I did a quick scan... nothing too dumb today.

Though I do have a few FB friends that will one day have something like:

'X likes "Lets see how many TRUE Christians there are on Facebook, click 'like' if you LOVE Jesus!"

Then the next day:

'X likes "Behind every BITCH there's a man who made her that way!"

My de-friend trigger finger gets mighty itchy sometimes.

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Yea, Facebook. Another love/hate relationship in my life. I did a quick scan... nothing too dumb today.

Though I do have a few FB friends that will one day have something like:

'X likes "Lets see how many TRUE Christians there are on Facebook, click 'like' if you LOVE Jesus!"

Then the next day:

'X likes "Behind every BITCH there's a man who made her that way!"

My de-friend trigger finger gets mighty itchy sometimes.

There has actually been a problem on Facebook recently where it will show that users have 'liked' things that they never clicked on.

For instance, Ocean of Notions hates atheists, apparently :)

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There has actually been a problem on Facebook recently where it will show that users have 'liked' things that they never clicked on.

For instance, Ocean of Notions hates atheists, apparently :)

Huh maybe thats it.

Or else... what is it going to take to convince OoN to love herself?

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I've had remarkably fewer irritating statuses posted since I purged my list of some of the people I used to work with that I don't ever see any more or don't want to see... The folks who posted things like "the only people who have ever offered to die for you are Jesus Christ and the American soldier."

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The key to Facebook is to not treat it like it's fucking MySpace and add every moron who you meet on the street to your list.

If you feel bad turning them down, just let their requests hang. Fostering a reputation for never checking your facebook makes doing this alot easier.

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I always laugh when people post vapid shit on their status bars and then whine little girls when you respond to it. With the guys its usually something teapartyish and the women in my orbit it usually something that their child did that they thought was funny so they decided to share it with the internets.

If I find the lunatic that came up with Farm-vile I'll kill him.

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If you feel bad turning them down, just let their requests hang. Fostering a reputation for never checking your facebook makes doing this alot easier.

I actually do this pretty well. I've had people in limbo for months and nobody blinked about it. Every now and again I have a weak moment. Occasionally there will be someone I'm not sure about and I'll convince myself it can't be that bad. I'm sure Charlie Brown always figured this time he'd kick the football too.

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