236 replies to this topic

[Fragile Bird]

Turkey Jack, on 06 April 2012 - 06:31 PM, said:

Why didnt Ned Starks head go to the red wedding party?

He had nobody to go with.

Groan..............lol

[Maester Murks]

Poor Mya was so sad, that Mychel Redfort married another woman. I guess that leaves Mya... forever a Stone!

[Alia of the knife]

What do you call a Targaryen with a golden crown?

A HOTHEAD.

[Mummer's Arse]

What is Renly's favourite ASOIAF book?

ACOK

[Mummer's Arse]

OldCorvid, on 06 April 2012 - 03:20 AM, said:

Who was the first brother that Stannis killed?

Robert. They said he was killed by a bore.
---
Who is the Freys' most loyal ally?

Wyman Manderly. He considers it a delight to serve them.
---
Which relative does Bran most envy?

Lysa Tully. He always dreamed of flying.

Did you make these up? Bloody brilliant

[OldCorvid]

Mummer, on 07 April 2012 - 06:14 PM, said:

Did you make these up? Bloody brilliant

Well the Manderly one is based on that old story "To Serve Man" but I made up the Westeros version and the other ones.

[lojzelote]

OK. I´m not good at jokes at all, this is more of a "funny"scene. Oh, well.

Tyrion continues in his quest to find out where the whores go. His search leads him to one of the Dornish brothels, where he encounters very out-of-place-looking Jon Snow. Tyrion is surprised to see him in place like this, and what´s more, in Dorne.
Tyrion: "Why such a long face? Have you just found out that the little snow hadn´t been able to withstand the climate change and thawed?"
Jon: "Um, not really. I´m only looking for my mother. I´ve heard rumors that Lord Eddard was first seen with me in Dorne, not so far from this place. But I think I know what you´re doing here."
Tyrion: "You won´t believe me, but I´m here to finally reconcile with my estranged wife."
Jon: "What? With Sansa?!!!"

Edited by lojzelote, 13 May 2012 - 01:25 PM.

[I'll pay the iron price]

Why was Lysa Arryn mad?




...........Because her son invited me to share his lunch

[dark-star]

Why dont the starks like the Bee Gees?

because they aren't stayin alive

sorry

Time for a poem

There was a young girl named danaerys
who ate some poisonous berries
she had a miscarriage
after her marriage
and I think she's away with the fairies (because of Quithe or however its spelt lol)

[DR Supporter]

Eddard Stark: H to E to A to D! It's DEAD! Gone.....

Catelyn Stark is looking at sculpture of stone. It was cut and a human heart was put in it in open display......

[Payme]

I love some of these... I have a couple of bad ones:

-*Knock-knock*

-Who's there?

-Dany...

-what the.. you still haven't left yet?

---

-*Knock-knock*

- Who's there?

- Hodor...

- Hodor Who?

- Hodor!

- i know, but Hodor Who?

- Hodor?

[SerMixalot]

OP dont quit your day job

[Patchface12]

An Other walks into the crossroads inn. People are afraid at first. However, the Other simply orders a drink in his icy voice and minds his own business. Eventually Masha Heddle approaches him and says, "You know, we don't get many Others in here."

To which he replies, "At these prices, I'm not surprised."

http://www.youtube.c...h?v=iMpXAknykeg

[DR Supporter]

Meeting at Westeros. Jaime, Bran, Meera and Lady Stoneheart are the only ones present. Bran is wearing the crown, Meera is wearing a smaller crown and Lady Stoneheart is carrying a torch.

LS: Jaime, I can speak. After all, Hand speaks with King's voice. And what my king wants to say to you is that you need to get a life, leave that sister of yours to real lions, and  bring him the legs to replace ones you rendered useless. Now, he says, GET OUT!!!!!

Jaime: *stunned* Wha.....?

Everyone Else: GET OUT!!!!!!!!!

Jaime: Okay.....but I shall not go alone, but my wife goes with me. I want you to meet my wife, Brienne of Tarth, now Brienne Lannister!

Jaime & Brienne: Hear Us Roar!

Lady Stoneheart, Bran & Meera: Wha......?

*Brienne and Jaime retire, with lion roaring in the background*

[Kambo]

I freely admit how horrid this is ...

When Brienne finally returned to Tarth why didn't her father recognise her?
Because she was a lot less cheeky then she had been as a child.

Edited by Kambo, 14 May 2012 - 05:55 PM.

[mor2]

Cersei message to Jaime: Help me. Save me. I need you as I have never needed you before. You are my favorite sibling with benefits...

Edited by mor2, 14 May 2012 - 06:30 PM.

[Kal Froggo]

Tyrion:"Bron!!! Already told you a thousand times to many!!! Leave my Lord Father's chamber pot alone!!"

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Tyrion to Little Finger: "Do you know the Greyjoy lad fingered his own sister??"

Little Finger: "iiiuuuu that's despicable even for me!!"

Jamie (overhearing the talk):"bahh... theres nothing wrong with that!!!"

[rickonfortheironthrone]

Why did the red wet shirt remain wet even after being exposed to the sun all day?

WHAT IS RED MAY NEVER DRY!!!

[rickonfortheironthrone]

What did Aerys do when his Hand failed him?

He FIRED him.

[ermireallydontcare]

These are so bad they're good. Ok that's a lie, some of them are just bad.

Also, as Ramsay Snow puts it to the torch, things are looking pretty stark at Winterfell.

(I willingly admit that probably falls into the just plain bad category.)