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Greyjoys - Dumb, dumber and dumbest


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#1 Ice Turtle

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Posted 15 April 2012 - 06:38 AM

Insanity isn't the only problem running in Greyjoy blood, some of them just seem like viking version of Homer Simpson or Forrest Gump, but which three are the least gifted when it comes to intelligence? Who is dumb, who is dumber and who is the dumbest in Greyjoy family?

#2 Bran of the Weirwoods

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Posted 15 April 2012 - 06:55 AM

1. Theon is dumbest. He literally thought the people of winterfel would welcome him as their ruler, and then refused to abandon the castle when Asha left.

2. Balon is dumber. I just don't like him. He was prepated to sacrifice his son to get revemge on the starks.

3. Victarion is dumb. He is a tool of Euron and is probably being manipulayed by Mocorro as well

#3 The Monkey

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Posted 15 April 2012 - 06:56 AM

I would call them overly proud more than anything. They are overestimating their own capabilities. They had a pretty decent navy at the stand of aCoK; they should have just declared themselves independent and kept the navy purely for defensive purposes. It might have been clever to establish an outpost on the mainland close to the Iron Islands, maybe at Seagard or Banefort, to better facilitate trade. But to stretch out their forces to the extent they did, whether in the North or in the Reach is catastrophic. If they had just kept to themselves, no one would have cared if they were independent (with the whole realm in chaos), and they could've kept their culture and religion as much as they had wished. But by attacking the coastline, they pissed off so many different lords that they will surely get invaded at some point.

#4 Thendel

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Posted 15 April 2012 - 07:07 AM

I wouldn't say insanity is rampant among the Greyjoys, save Euron, who is likely a psychopath. Balon was merely a bitter, self-deluded man.

But for the most stupid:
1. Theon, for numerous blunders, the largest being actually believing he could hold Winterfell with a handful of men.
2. Victarion: The man understands one thing, and that's how to fight and be a reaver. In all other matters, he is played by Euron and Moqorro.
3. Balon: I have no idea how that man expected to hold areas so far apart, much less rule them. Also in possession of a woefully poor understanding of the political climate.

#5 lyvyathan

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Posted 15 April 2012 - 07:08 AM

View PostThe Monkey, on 15 April 2012 - 06:56 AM, said:

I would call them overly proud more than anything. They are overestimating their own capabilities. They had a pretty decent navy at the stand of aCoK; they should have just declared themselves independent and kept the navy purely for defensive purposes. It might have been clever to establish an outpost on the mainland close to the Iron Islands, maybe at Seagard or Banefort, to better facilitate trade. But to stretch out their forces to the extent they did, whether in the North or in the Reach is catastrophic. If they had just kept to themselves, no one would have cared if they were independent (with the whole realm in chaos), and they could've kept their culture and religion as much as they had wished. But by attacking the coastline, they pissed off so many different lords that they will surely get invaded at some point.

The books also mention that they made a big mistake in not making an alliance with the Lannisters first before declaring war on the North.

The realization that Tywin et al were laughing at their alliance was a big face palm.

#6 Pellaeon

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Posted 15 April 2012 - 07:18 AM

1. Balon attack the only other King who won't attck the iron islands to rule over all seven kingdoms, and believe he could brocker a peace with the Lannister
2. Theon "Let's attack the strongest castle in the north, with 50 men, and pretend to kill two little boys, the people will accept me as their Lord"
3. Victarion "Let's trust the red priest"

#7 Noimporta

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Posted 15 April 2012 - 07:48 AM

1) Victarion, thick as a brick.
2) Aeron, when you spend that much time underwater, not enough oxygen gets to your brain.
3) Balon and Asha in ACOK, herp da derp, attack the north.
4) Theon, a sharp mind but unwise and emotionally unstable.
5) Asha, after her magical change of character in AFFC.
6) Euron.

#8 Gurkhal

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Posted 15 April 2012 - 02:07 PM

View Postlyvyathan, on 15 April 2012 - 07:08 AM, said:

The books also mention that they made a big mistake in not making an alliance with the Lannisters first before declaring war on the North.

The realization that Tywin et al were laughing at their alliance was a big face palm.

Yeah I also think this was their big mistake. Instead of going either with Robb for independence of joining the Iron Throne for rewards afterwards they failed with both options.

In the end I think that the Greyjoys are both a bit mad as a whole and living in past ages.

#9 eyeheartsansa

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Posted 15 April 2012 - 04:34 PM

Asha and Euron seem pretty bright.

#10 Lothar Imbel

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Posted 15 April 2012 - 04:53 PM

And Rodrik Harlaw.  Not an actual Greyjoy, but there's as much Harlaw in Theon and Asha as there is Greyjoy.

#11 James Arryn

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Posted 15 April 2012 - 05:15 PM

I can see why people think Theon's an idiot...he does idiotic things a lot...but sort of like Cersei, he also shows flashes of perception/lateral thinking. So I think of him more as lazy/ADHD or just so emotionally stupid his brains are in suspended animation.

Edited by James Arryn, 15 April 2012 - 05:15 PM.


#12 Catastrophe

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Posted 15 April 2012 - 05:26 PM

Balon is by far the dumbest. Refusing the Starks' offer of an alliance and then attacking the North was one of the dumbest things anyone's done in the whole series. He finally had a chance to be independent like he'd always wanted, and instead he throws it away for some half-assed plan that could never possibly work. He had no idea how military strategies work and his plan was practically suicidal. What an idiot.

#13 Lord Littlefinger's Lash

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Posted 15 April 2012 - 05:50 PM

View PostIce Turtle, on 15 April 2012 - 06:38 AM, said:

Insanity isn't the only problem running in Greyjoy blood, some of them just seem like viking version of Homer Simpson or Forrest Gump, but which three are the least gifted when it comes to intelligence? Who is dumb, who is dumber and who is the dumbest in Greyjoy family?
Euron is a genius.

#14 oldnumericals

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Posted 15 April 2012 - 06:06 PM

I think Theon was more naive than dumb.  Even his decision to occupy Winterfell stemmed in part to him having grown up there.  

Victarion is indubitably a dumb man--he is perpetually getting played, and when he decides to break out and do something independent, he's just getting played harder.

Aeron is dumber, but that might be my lack of trust in men whose idea of faith involves drowning people before performing CPR.

Euron and Asha are smart, but Euron had the advantage of being utterly ruthless, and of having a penis.

#15 Lord Littlefinger's Lash

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Posted 15 April 2012 - 06:21 PM

View PostCatastrophe, on 15 April 2012 - 05:26 PM, said:

Balon is by far the dumbest. Refusing the Starks' offer of an alliance and then attacking the North was one of the dumbest things anyone's done in the whole series. He finally had a chance to be independent like he'd always wanted, and instead he throws it away for some half-assed plan that could never possibly work. He had no idea how military strategies work and his plan was practically suicidal. What an idiot.
that wasn't so dumb.  Balon isn't playing to win, he's playing to lose the least.  If he loses the war in the North, they don't have any means to retaliate against him.

#16 Jack's Smirking Revenge

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Posted 15 April 2012 - 06:31 PM

I don't think Euron or Asha are dumb.  Both are pretty smart, Euron plays everyone like a fiddle and Asha has the foresight to see how stupid and destructive the war is.  I think she'll figure something out to have the Ironborn join forces with Stannis or some Northern lord.

1. Balon is the dumbest.  I can understand his anger a losing his sons, but Robb Stark gave him a pretty good deal.  Instead he wasted lives and resources on a pointless war that the Ironborn could never win.

2. Theon - "Herp derp I'm going to to attack Winterfell with 50 men and then not leave when my sister tells me to out of arrogance."

3.  Victorian -  He's amusing but an idiot.  He's good at reaving and fighting and not much else.

#17 Catastrophe

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Posted 15 April 2012 - 06:33 PM

View PostLord Littlefinger, on 15 April 2012 - 06:21 PM, said:

that wasn't so dumb.  Balon isn't playing to win, he's playing to lose the least.  If he loses the war in the North, they don't have any means to retaliate against him.

If Balon simply wanted to "lose the least" he would've remained neutral, it's not like anyone was forcing him to take part in the war. He was definitely playing to win, he just had a piss poor plan for doing it. Whether he won or lost the war in the North, he would've ended up facing retaliation sooner or later, if not from the Starks then from whoever ended up with the Iron Throne. Do you really think Renly or Stannis or Tywin would've ever let him permanently secede?

#18 Dr. Pepper

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Posted 15 April 2012 - 06:42 PM

Some Greyjoy characters have done stupid things, but the only one I see as truly dumb is Victarion.  He's a big, stupid oaf.  The exact definitions of stupid and dumb.

Pride gets in the way of any intelligence Balon may have had so it's difficult to determine his intelligence level.

I don't think Theon is inherently dumb.  His character is an interesting exploration of what happens to a person when they suffer from a severely fractured identity.  He does a very dumb thing by attacking Winterfell but the strategy he wanted to use to take WF isn't a dumb one.

Damphair probably leans more towards the dumb end of the spectrum, but my thoughts on his mental abilities are highly biased by my thoughts on those who blindly believe in the power of divine intervention.

I have no firm opinion on Euron.  I learn towards him being intelligent but I don't know all that much about him to really know.

Asha and The Reader Rodrick are probably the most intelligent of the Greyjoys we've been shown.    Both seem to have highly developed reasoning skills.

#19 Milcov

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Posted 15 April 2012 - 06:44 PM

1. Aeron
2. Victarion
3. Balon
4. Theon
5. Asha

Just leaves Euron who's a pretty smart guy.

#20 MrSnowBasterdofTheNorth

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Posted 15 April 2012 - 06:49 PM

Victarion is dumb for not killing his brother Euron for basically raping his wife, and also for not destroying Euron when he had the command of the 99 ships.
Theon is Dumber because he thought he could hold the North by becoming a Turncloak against Robb, but he is starting to get smart again as Theon and not Reek
Balon is the dumbest, he thought he would be able to take what he wanted by going to war with the people of Westeros, but he was slammed down before and now he is dead, so yeah, definitely not the smartest