Are the Kettleblacks secret Targaryens?
Posted 15 May 2012 - 09:44 PM
1) They never get sick.
It's a known fact that Tarygaryens, through inbreeding (which, as we know, is not at all dangerous or harmful), have managed to become immune to diseases, like some form of an anti-Darwinist hermit crab. Even Cersei, our golden queen, had been known to get the shits from time to time. But did we ever read in detail about the Kettleblack's abnormal bowel movements or pus-filled globules flowing from their ass? I think not.
2) They hide their Silver Hair™ and Purple Eyes™.
Like Rocky VI and Varys, the Kettleblacks conceal their trademarked Targaryen features. Rocky VI died his hair blue, and Varys uses a five blade razor, The Kettleblack drinks potion to create thick layers of coarse black hair to cover their body. I don't know all the ingredients, but it probably contains cock of the monkey.
3) Why the Hell not?
It's a new fad. Everyone's being a secret Targ these days.
Posted 15 May 2012 - 11:23 PM
Posted 15 May 2012 - 11:30 PM
Edited by Jolene Brown, 15 May 2012 - 11:30 PM.
Posted 15 May 2012 - 11:49 PM
Posted 16 May 2012 - 12:09 AM
Posted 16 May 2012 - 12:31 AM
Hodor is also a secret Targ because he constantly repeats himself = redundant = kind of nuts = Secret Targ.
Posted 16 May 2012 - 02:13 AM
Edited by Arthanis, 16 May 2012 - 02:13 AM.
Posted 16 May 2012 - 02:18 AM
Posted 16 May 2012 - 03:20 AM
Viserys was a Blackfyre Pretender all along.
Posted 16 May 2012 - 03:41 AM
"Dragon has three heads" - so we clearly know they are both Targs and AA (because there are 3 Kettleblacks). Maybe they are Great Other too?
If you remove "black" part from their surname, then put letter of their name in folllowing orther:
TTLEKE, then replace first letter with O, third with H and add RS isntead of two last letter you have "OTHERS" - and "Balck" may mean "shadow" - Ice shadows, The Others.
Also their names start with "OS", which truly is shorter version of "OtherS" word.
There is also possibility of one of Kettleblacks being Ashara Dayne.
Edited by Arthanis, 16 May 2012 - 03:49 AM.
Posted 16 May 2012 - 03:43 AM
Posted 16 May 2012 - 03:46 AM
Posted 16 May 2012 - 03:52 AM
Triple Penetration hardcore sex scene in TWoW?
Posted 16 May 2012 - 04:28 AM
Disgustingly hairy. Pass the brain-bleach, would you?
Posted 16 May 2012 - 04:36 AM
-The Lannister siblings
-The Kettleback siblings
-and half of westeros
So many Targs and only one throne and three dragons, to bad