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TED ROCKSON: ULTIMATE AMERICAN (Barbarian Snark #6)


MinDonner

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"But I give them food, shelter. More food than all my predecessors put together. I have tried to stop unnecessary brutality, torture."

I'm clearly forgetting something here. Are there even any non-resistance fighters left in the USSA, apart from the slave laborers that I vaguely recall from one of the books - the ones who were too downtrodden to be able to rise up and be cannon fodder or whatever, who'd had all resistance bred out of them. Didn't seem like they were capable of much "war, blood and more blood", IIRC. Does this mean that CC and the rest of the softball league are getting food drops from the russkies? Unless it's the glowers or the panther women who get all these ineffectual care packages.

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Does this mean that CC and the rest of the softball league are getting food drops from the russkies?

Maybe they do without realising it: the brave and noble freedom fighters shoot down any planes and attack any convoys that come within their reach, including humanitarian relief missions. Afterwards they congratulate themselves for their martial prowess and loot the wreckage which, much to their delight, contains lots of food. The reasons the Russians don't change their MO is of course COMMUNISM!

That sounds way too plausible for a Stacy plot, though.

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Rahallah didn't pray for help - he demanded it, shaking the skull-stick at the writhing gray clouds above, which continued to send down curtains of the fluffy thick flakes of snow. The whiteness quickly covered him, so that only his arms and mouth, which continued in ritual motion, were visible. Through the long night he vocalised the ancient words, the secret harmonies to call up the gods of Africa, to make them rise up through the parched earth of the plains, make them fly down from the icy perches of Mt Kilimanjaro.

Holy mother of god. That really is something special.

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I'm clearly forgetting something here. Are there even any non-resistance fighters left in the USSA, apart from the slave laborers that I vaguely recall from one of the books - the ones who were too downtrodden to be able to rise up and be cannon fodder or whatever, who'd had all resistance bred out of them. Didn't seem like they were capable of much "war, blood and more blood", IIRC. Does this mean that CC and the rest of the softball league are getting food drops from the russkies? Unless it's the glowers or the panther women who get all these ineffectual care packages.

No, you are quite correct - the only Americans still living in America are either secret rebel resistance fighters, downtrodden slave labourers or crazed postapocalyptic cult members (hipsters, Barbarahs, Car Ones, panther women, cannibals, etc etc). So I guess CC is getting the food drops after all. It would explain all that lobster and coffee and other luxury foodstuffs that they seem to be getting from their "hydroponics labs". Shecter is a fraud!

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No, you are quite correct - the only Americans still living in America are either secret rebel resistance fighters, downtrodden slave labourers or crazed postapocalyptic cult members (hipsters, Barbarahs, Car Ones, panther women, cannibals, etc etc). So I guess CC is getting the food drops after all. It would explain all that lobster and coffee and other luxury foodstuffs that they seem to be getting from their "hydroponics labs". Shecter is a fraud!

So...what is the Russian Empire getting from America?

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Pah! To trample freedom-lovin capitalist pigs beneath one's bootheel is an end in itself. What need they of recompense? As long as somewhere, somehow, an American is being oppressed, the commies can sleep easy knowing that it has all been worth it.

Actually, according to the preface of the earlier books, America supposedly is forced to export 75% of all food to Russia. Maybe Vassily then just sends most of it back? Typical commie inefficiency. :commie:

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75 % of all foods... I bet they ship radioactive Chernobyl-gruel to the States, and force the nonexistent populace there to make the solidly American foods for export. We all know the gourmand ways of the USSR - only American delicacies like McD's, Budweiser, Mountain Dew and Twinkies (all rebranded, of course) will suffice.

I mean, I guess you could technically make them in-country, but it wouldn't be the same without the spice of oppression and slavery, would it?

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Pah! To trample freedom-lovin capitalist pigs beneath one's bootheel is an end in itself. What need they of recompense? As long as somewhere, somehow, an American is being oppressed, the commies can sleep easy knowing that it has all been worth it.

Of course!

Actually, according to the preface of the earlier books, America supposedly is forced to export 75% of all food to Russia. Maybe Vassily then just sends most of it back? Typical commie inefficiency. :commie:

But who is exporting said food? The panther-women? The hippies? The Glowers? The Pony Express?

Century City itself? Could it be that Rath has been working with the Russians and setting up fake missions for Rockson and co. to keep him out of his hair while he acts as supreme overlord of America?

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I would so love it if that were true. :lol:

For a fact, our post-apocalyptic countryside has been notably devoid of any amber waves of grain. I guess there's plenty good eating on a giant octopus, but, cannibals aside, there's not really any farming going on of any kind. Let's have a look back at our slave camps and see if they are doing anything that remotely resembles food production.

There's Smith-14, who works in a factory making uniforms (out of what?). Chaplin-47... nope, he just gets strapped to the Mindbreaker and gets turned into brainwashed cannon-fodder. The chaps in Fort Svetlanya didn't do anything at all. And when Rock was in the slave camp with no memory, all he has to do is carry shit and corpses and dump them into the swamp.

So, that's a no, then. No-one grows any food. It just sorta appears.

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You'd think. But I just had a quick look, and on one side of the diner, there is that Landscape of Metal with the deadly lightning. And on the other, it's just "fairly flat salt seas and pebble-strewn dead lands" that nonetheless manage to support the occasional buffalo. I wonder if he meant salt flats? So much stuff I'm realising I failed to even notice the first time through.

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No, they probably just happened to have a couple of hundred years worth of canned and frozen supplies in the larder when the USA was nuked. You know how it is when there is a special offer on and you buy too much.

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Oops, missed this. No, there are plenty of generals left, all of whom bow and scrape and tug their forelocks at Colonel Killov and call him things like "your excellency". In Communist Russia, generals take orders from YOU! Or, alternatively, Stacy has no idea how things like ranks work.

Maybe Colonel's his first name?

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