Jump to content


Photo

Why Sansa is a great character


  • This topic is locked This topic is locked
485 replies to this topic

#1 WeirwoodTreeHugger

WeirwoodTreeHugger

    Ser Pounce lives!

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 1,856 posts

Posted 28 July 2013 - 06:26 PM

Around here Sansa seems to be one of the most popular characters. I've been thinking about why that might be and here's my take on it.
Sansa is easily the most relatable female character. She grows up somewhat naïve and spoiled, but basically a normal girl who likes stories, songs and sweets (delicious, delicious lemoncakes).
Arya is one my favorites, but she is the kind of kid one only finds in fantasy tales, never in real life. Daenerys is a very interesting character but somewhat alien. She's an exiled princess, a silver haired and purple eyed beauty, and she has dragons. Again, a type of character found in fantasy but not reality.

Sansa also embodies, for me anyways the perils of being a woman in a patriarchal society. The moment she is removed from the safety of her family she is subjected to the gaze of many of the male characters she meets. Predators are around every corner. Joffrey strips her and has his kingsguard beat her. The Hound, Tyrion, Dontos and Littlefinger are all lecherous towards her.
The first time I read Sansa's chapter I was in constant fear that she would be raped. As women, the threat of rape lurks in the back our minds all the time. When going on a date, walking down the street or getting a drink at a bar you just never know if you will encounter a rapist. Reading Sansa's chapters recall this for me. It's a little scary being a woman and it's a little scary reading a Sansa chapter.
Before anybody gets upset with me I want to clarify that I am in no way implying that I think all men are rapists. Also this thread is not meant to start a controversy on the definition of rape or if LF is a rapist. I'm merely stating that I was afraid for Sansa while reading her chapters. Please don't post anything that will get this thread locked. /eek.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt=':eek:' />

I'm particularly interested in whether or not fellow female Sansa fans agree with me on this. Of course, anybody's perspective is welcome. Do male Sansa find her relatable as well? Or do you like her for some other reason? You're also welcome to share if you don't find her likable or relatable.

#2 Lala

Lala

    A Song of Icecream and Fireflies

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 1,000 posts

Posted 28 July 2013 - 06:36 PM

I really do love Sansa as well - as a fairly "girly" girl, Sansa was immediately relatable - her dreams about the prince on a white horse, her anger at having a pretty dress ruined - they're all emotions that I know and identify with.

But what I love more about Sansa are all of the little ways she has of showing the Lannisters that they may beat her, but not break her; they may rape her, but not sully her; they make take everything, but they cannot take away who she is. When she asks Joffrey "or maybe Robb will bring me your head," when she tells Ser Meryn "You are no true knight," when she refuses to kneel at her wedding to the Lannisters - these moments all make me fall in love with her over and over again.

So yes, I love Sansa because she's so easy to understand, so normal. But I love her even more because she is strong, she is a Stark of Winterfell, and, despite everything she has been through, she is unbowed, unbent, unbroken.

ETA: This totally reads like an ode to Sansa. And it's fully intended to be one.

Edited by Lala, 28 July 2013 - 06:38 PM.


#3 Lehnaru

Lehnaru

    Landed Knight

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 381 posts

Posted 28 July 2013 - 06:54 PM

I'm a male Sansa fan and I find her relatable and likable - at first glance, Westeros seems like a place you'd find in a fairy tale, but after some very slight investigation, you find that Westeros is terrifying and full of absoutely horrible people! She reacts to it all like I'd expect any normal person to react. People of both genders dislike Sansa because they know deep down that they'd be in a situation just like hers and that they'd cope with it no better than she would, and they hate and fear that about themselves. They prefer to immerse themselves in tough characters like Arya or leader characters like Dany and Ned as they do the job that fantasy is supposed to do, which is to draw them out of reality for a bit to enjoy the story through the eyes of someone much more competent than themselves. Sansa's awful situation and inability to actually improve it just reinforces their feelings of helplessness and inadequacy and the fears that everyone has in everyday life, so they take it out on her. For example, the vast majority of people calling Sansa "stupid" and "cowardly" would have no idea how to handle her situation and would probably end up dead at court faster than the brave, rash, outspoken Arya. That's just my take.

Edited by Lehnaru, 28 July 2013 - 06:56 PM.


#4 Aleenys

Aleenys

    Sellsword

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 96 posts

Posted 28 July 2013 - 07:01 PM

I agree wholeheartedly. Every reader seeks out a character they can relate to in a fictional piece in terms of personality, and Sansa is exactly that for me. Even her most disliked traits I see people claim I find admirable and understandable. The first thing that drew me to the character was her stubborn idealism (she is condemned a lot for this) and love of chivalry and songs (which she is accused of being shallow for).

I find her clinging to the belief of good in others and making statements like "Knights are supposed to protect women and children" even after being subjected to abuse at the hands of those she believed to be good, fascinating. She survives the Viper's Nest that is King's Landing without becoming a vindictive, bitter woman like Cersei, retaining her kindness and empathy for others.

Even now, she's faced with a bigger threat, Littlefinger means to turn her into a version of himself, meaning to create the perfect Cat he failed to have, the one who supports him in his crimes and manipulations and this time "willingly" chooses him. If she prevails over this challenge, she will top my favourite fictional characters list. This time her identity is threatened, and I believe her northern roots will prove predominant.

I still have my fears though, hopefully George won't do a backwards turn with her character and take away her core characteristics from her. I expect her to have her shining moments in the last two books, surprising everyone who thought less of her for the whole series. I'd love for her to have her happy ending, because she is one of the characters that deserve it most.

#5 The Fallen

The Fallen

    If at first you don't succeed, catapult them again.

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 3,078 posts

Posted 28 July 2013 - 07:02 PM

` I found her annoying, initially. And I'll never forget how she betrayed Ned by disclosing his plans to Cersei. She's changed for the better since then.

Having said that, I don't dislike her. As a male, I didn't think that she would be raped around every corner. It's interesting that you felt that way. Since I'm a male I know that not every man is a rapist, but the fact that you have to look out for that is fascinating.

Since Sansa is a Stark I hope she survives and has a good ending. I guess my loyalty to her is more as a Stark than anything else. Although I wouldn't want anything bad to happen to her were she not a Stark.

#6 Newstar

Newstar

    Blood of the Dragon

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 3,720 posts

Posted 28 July 2013 - 07:11 PM

Sansa is easily the most relatable female character. She grows up somewhat naïve and spoiled, but basically a normal girl who likes stories, songs and sweets (delicious, delicious lemoncakes).

Arya is one my favorites, but she is the kind of kid one only finds in fantasy tales, never in real life.


Eh, speak for yourself. Arya is the "kind of kid one only finds in fantasy tales" insofar as you don't see many wargmaster baby assassins running around in real life, but mouthy, smart, tough, feisty tomboys who sucked at traditionally feminine pursuits, spoke their minds, and took no crap from anyone? I knew tons of girls like that growing up. You can't throw a rock in an Honours program without hitting an Arya. They might not have been as awesome as Arya, and they were more likely to graduate at the top of their class and go off to study computer engineering or something, but they were pretty badass, and they were plenty "relatable."

If you honestly believe that there are no girls like Arya--tough, clever, brave, outspoken, determined, etc.--in real life because you've never met any, then I kind of feel sorry for you, because 1) they exist and 2) they are awesome.

...And sadly, as for the Arya in later books, a traumatized lone wolf desensitized to killing, there are only too many children like that in real life (child soldiers, which GRRM has said in interviews paralleled Arya's experience, or words to that effect), although I would hope most ASOIAF readers wouldn't be able to relate to that aspect of her journey (as it would mean they had gone through some pretty hairy stuff).

Edited by Newstar, 28 July 2013 - 07:20 PM.


#7 lifefullofwords

lifefullofwords

    Sellsword

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • 137 posts

Posted 28 July 2013 - 07:12 PM

Sansa is easily the most relatable female character. She grows up somewhat naïve and spoiled, but basically a normal girl who likes stories, songs and sweets (delicious, delicious lemoncakes).
Arya is one my favorites, but she is the kind of kid one only finds in fantasy tales, never in real life. Daenerys is a very interesting character but somewhat alien. She's an exiled princess, a silver haired and purple eyed beauty, and she has dragons. Again, a type of character found in fantasy but not reality.


I prefer Sansa to Arya and Dany as well but that's not because I can relate to her better than I can to them. I can't say I have much in common with any of those characters but I'm certainly more like Dany than I am like Sansa. Like Dany, I can be overly idealistic, have a horrible temper, and suffer from a surfeit of ambition. But I still like Sansa better because I find her to be a far more interesting character. Like you said, Arya and Dany are typical fantasy novel characters. It fascinates me that Sansa is simultaneously so ordinary and such an original character.

There are a number of reasons I have difficulty relating to Sansa on a personal level. First of all, I'm just not as passive as she is. Honestly, I probably wouldn't have survived in her shoes because I would have done something rash. And I've felt different from people my whole life whereas Sansa is the kind of person who fits in. I'm also fundamentally not a very trusting person, although I appreciate people that are trusting. Basically, I even though I like Sansa a lot even though we have very little in common.

Sansa also embodies, for me anyways the perils of being a woman in a patriarchal society. The moment she is removed from the safety of her family she is subjected to the gaze of many of the male characters she meets. Predators are around every corner. Joffrey strips her and has his kingsguard beat her. The Hound, Tyrion, Dontos and Littlefinger are all lecherous towards her.
The first time I read Sansa's chapter I was in constant fear that she would be raped. As women, the threat of rape lurks in the back our minds all the time. When going on a date, walking down the street or getting a drink at a bar you just never know if you will encounter a rapist. Reading Sansa's chapters recall this for me. It's a little scary being a woman and it's a little scary reading a Sansa chapter.


You know, I hadn't thought about it before now but if there's anything that really resonates with me personally about her chapters it's the way the threat of rape, assault, and harassment lurk around every corner. I'm both petite and naturally anxious so I worry quite a bit about being sexually assaulted. I know most men don't do things like that but all it takes is one bad apple. While reading Sansa's chapters I've frequently considered that if I were her I'd do almost anything to escape from KL. I think the way she endures so much so gracefully is incredibly admirable.

Edited by lifefullofwords, 28 July 2013 - 07:13 PM.


#8 Kittykatknits

Kittykatknits

    Member of the Oppressive Matriarchy

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 5,421 posts

Posted 28 July 2013 - 07:26 PM

I'm particularly interested in whether or not fellow female Sansa fans agree with me on this. Of course, anybody's perspective is welcome. Do male Sansa find her relatable as well? Or do you like her for some other reason? You're also welcome to share if you don't find her likable or relatable.

Well, I'm a huge Sansa fan, as many probably already know. However, I'm not all that like her nor does she especially remind me of myself as a kid. I enjoy her character because she's incredibly complex and has a great arc. Plus, she's very different from most female characters that I find in fantasy fiction, a nice subversion on the princess in the tower. Her bravery and her strengths can be overlooked but are just as valuable and worthy as someone who swings a sword or fights in battle.

#9 grand old duke of stark

grand old duke of stark

    Council Member

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 1,031 posts

Posted 28 July 2013 - 07:34 PM

I admire Sansa's endurance but cannot like her. I detest passivity in anyone, male or female. Even more, I detest naivete. The fact that she caused Lady's death and (unwittingly) betrayed her father was the icing on the cake. However, she has sloooowly become more astute, more assertive, more confident, making even me hope that she will prevail and have some revenge, whether it's ladylike or not. But she seems not to have a drop of wolf blood, which is almost unforgiveable in a Stark.

#10 WeirwoodTreeHugger

WeirwoodTreeHugger

    Ser Pounce lives!

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 1,856 posts

Posted 28 July 2013 - 07:35 PM

Eh, speak for yourself. Arya is the "kind of kid one only finds in fantasy tales" insofar as you don't see many wargmaster baby assassins running around in real life, but mouthy, smart, tough, feisty tomboys who sucked at traditionally feminine pursuits, spoke their minds, and took no crap from anyone? I knew tons of girls like that growing up. You can't throw a rock in an Honours program without hitting an Arya. They might not have been as awesome as Arya, and they were more likely to graduate at the top of their class and go off to study computer engineering or something, but they were pretty badass, and they were plenty "relatable."

If you honestly believe that there are no girls like Arya--tough, clever, brave, outspoken, determined, etc.--in real life because you've never met any, then I kind of feel sorry for you, because 1) they exist and 2) they are awesome.

...And sadly, as for the Arya in later books, a traumatized lone wolf desensitized to killing, there are only too many children like that in real life (child soldiers, which GRRM has said in interviews paralleled Arya's experience, or words to that effect), although I would hope most ASOIAF readers wouldn't be able to relate to that aspect of her journey (as it would mean they had gone through some pretty hairy stuff).

I'm very fortunate in not being able to relate to child soldiers! /crying.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt=':crying:' />

You do have a good point. My social skills and looks growing up were probably closer to Arya than Sansa's. I was teased for having messy hair and being weird. I do actually relate to her. I also relate to Brienne because I have a physical characteristic that is unusual and effects my life.

That being said, fantasy is filled with cool misfit characters. ASOAF has several. With Sansa, we have a character that isn't very unusual. We still know she has her Starkitude and that will somehow come it out. It's just cool that she's strong in her own way. A way that many regular people would be if dropped into a similar situation.

#11 jenerationx

jenerationx

    Hedge Knight

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPipPip
  • 366 posts

Posted 28 July 2013 - 07:37 PM

I love Sansa, but it took me some time to get there. I agree that as an 11-year-old, I resembled Sansa far more than Arya, but still -- initially, it's hard to feel sympathetic for her because she's surrounded by all these other characters, female and male alike, who are far more aware than she is. All of her interests are superficial, unimportant and childish. It didn't matter that she was a child, or that that was pretty much how she was raised to be (a "lady") -- the other kids had depth, right from the start (ok, maybe not Rickon), while she was alone in her shallowness. And it didn't help that her naivete was used to help advance the downfall of her family. She was a victim of others' machinations, but because she played right into their hands, and pretty much directly lead to the death of the main protagonist (or so we thought at the time), her own father, it was easy to throw one's hands up in despair/disgust at her.

Where she turned the corner is that once the wool was pulled from her eyes, she was finally "one of us." She finally recognized who her enemies were and that she was in a pit of vipers, fighting for her survival. I like that she doesn't use a boy's method of fighting back (as Arya does); she fights back with her girl qualities, the very same qualities that she was raised with, because realistically in this world, that's all that a majority of women can fight with. And just because they're feminine qualities doesn't make them lesser than women who use more traditionally masculine qualities (both are fine!). Way more articulately stated in this essay: In defense of Sansa Stark. And it also helps that there's someone like The Hound around, who serves in the audience's stead to continually prod her into seeing beyond the surface. From the point where she gains awareness, her lapses of immaturity and/or innocence are much more tolerable, because those of us who like her do realize that she's young, and sheltered, and still learning that the world her parents brought her up in isn't the world anymore.

It's incredibly awesome to come to the forums and realize that Sansa has so many fans, because honestly, in the broader community, she doesn't. People who only watch the TV show despise her. People who only read the books casually despise her. Even my own best friend, who normally sees eye to eye with me on just about everything, can't stand her. /sad.png' class='bbc_emoticon' alt=':(' /> They keep waiting for her to do something legit awesome, and I don't know that that will ever happen, because I feel like they're waiting for some huge, dramatic moment that will seal her worthiness. That's just not her story. Her story is about quiet endurance and playing the game by moving pawns ... not swashbuckling heroics.

#12 Lala

Lala

    A Song of Icecream and Fireflies

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 1,000 posts

Posted 28 July 2013 - 07:40 PM

I love Sansa, but it took me some time to get there. I agree that as an 11-year-old, I resembled Sansa far more than Arya, but still -- initially, it's hard to feel sympathetic for her because she's surrounded by all these other characters, female and male alike, who are far more aware than she is. All of her interests are superficial, unimportant and childish. It didn't matter that she was a child, or that that was pretty much how she was raised to be (a "lady") -- the other kids had depth, right from the start (ok, maybe not Rickon), while she was alone in her shallowness. And it didn't help that her naivete was used to help advance the downfall of her family. She was a victim of others' machinations, but because she played right into their hands, and pretty much directly lead to the death of the main protagonist (or so we thought at the time), her own father, it was easy to throw one's hands up in despair/disgust at her.

Where she turned the corner is that once the wool was pulled from her eyes, she was finally "one of us." She finally recognized who her enemies were and that she was in a pit of vipers, fighting for her survival. I like that she doesn't use a boy's method of fighting back (as Arya does); she fights back with her girl qualities, the very same qualities that she was raised with, because realistically in this world, that's all that a majority of women can fight with. And just because they're feminine qualities doesn't make them lesser than women who use more traditionally masculine qualities (both are fine!). Way more articulately stated in this essay: In defense of Sansa Stark. And it also helps that there's someone like The Hound around, who serves in the audience's stead to continually prod her into seeing beyond the surface. From the point where she gains awareness, her lapses of immaturity and/or innocence are much more tolerable, because those of us who like her do realize that she's young, and sheltered, and still learning that the world her parents brought her up in isn't the world anymore.

It's incredibly awesome to come to the forums and realize that Sansa has so many fans, because honestly, in the broader community, she doesn't. People who only watch the TV show despise her. People who only read the books casually despise her. Even my own best friend, who normally sees eye to eye with me on just about everything, can't stand her. /sad.png' class='bbc_emoticon' alt=':(' /> They keep waiting for her to do something legit awesome, and I don't know that that will ever happen, because I feel like they're waiting for some huge, dramatic moment that will seal her worthiness. That's just not her story. Her story is about quiet endurance and playing the game by moving pawns ... not swashbuckling heroics.


Courtesy is a woman's armor /smile.png' class='bbc_emoticon' alt=':)' />





And her sword (can I talk about how much I love Sansa more? please?)

#13 TalalOfDorne

TalalOfDorne

    Prince Of Pyke And Lord Reaper Of Sunspear

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 4,191 posts

Posted 28 July 2013 - 08:01 PM

I like her. I do find her relatable but to some extent though. Still she is one of my favorite characters.

#14 Newstar

Newstar

    Blood of the Dragon

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 3,720 posts

Posted 28 July 2013 - 08:01 PM

You do have a good point. My social skills and looks growing up were probably closer to Arya than Sansa's. I was teased for having messy hair and being weird. I do actually relate to her. I also relate to Brienne because I have a physical characteristic that is unusual and effects my life.


It's funny, because in university my two best friends were a Sansa type (tall, sweet, gorgeous, catnip to the "In crowd," kindhearted, family-oriented, into creative writing--which you know would be true of 21st-century Sansa, etc.) and an Arya type (short, brilliant, blunt, tough-minded, independent, unconventional).

That being said, fantasy is filled with cool misfit characters. ASOAF has several. With Sansa, we have a character that isn't very unusual. We still know she has her Starkitude and that will somehow come it out. It's just cool that she's strong in her own way. A way that many regular people would be if dropped into a similar situation.


Arya as a character type is not "unusual" in real life in the sense of uncommon. I do agree that Sansa, apart from her beauty, is not really "unusual" in the sense of possessing skills or attributes that elevate her above the average person. The problem is that she's stuck in a series where all the prominent characters, including most of her siblings, seem to have some amazing talent or ability (jury's still out on Rickon), even the ones as beautiful or more beautiful than Sansa; as a result, she looks rather unimpressive in comparison.

#15 Leif

Leif

    A cleaved head no longer plots

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 1,308 posts

Posted 28 July 2013 - 08:02 PM

At first she was annoying, now she's just boring.

#16 Florina Laufeyson

Florina Laufeyson

    Lord of Chaos

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 6,677 posts

Posted 28 July 2013 - 08:10 PM

Eh, speak for yourself. Arya is the "kind of kid one only finds in fantasy tales" insofar as you don't see many wargmaster baby assassins running around in real life, but mouthy, smart, tough, feisty tomboys who sucked at traditionally feminine pursuits, spoke their minds, and took no crap from anyone? I knew tons of girls like that growing up. You can't throw a rock in an Honours program without hitting an Arya. They might not have been as awesome as Arya, and they were more likely to graduate at the top of their class and go off to study computer engineering or something, but they were pretty badass, and they were plenty "relatable."

If you honestly believe that there are no girls like Arya--tough, clever, brave, outspoken, determined, etc.--in real life because you've never met any, then I kind of feel sorry for you, because 1) they exist and 2) they are awesome.

...And sadly, as for the Arya in later books, a traumatized lone wolf desensitized to killing, there are only too many children like that in real life (child soldiers, which GRRM has said in interviews paralleled Arya's experience, or words to that effect), although I would hope most ASOIAF readers wouldn't be able to relate to that aspect of her journey (as it would mean they had gone through some pretty hairy stuff).

/thumbsup.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt=':thumbsup:' /> Yes. And also agree with the last paragraph. What happened to Arya is horribly sad and crushingly so when i realize...she was once just like me! /bawl.gif' class='bbc_emoticon' alt=':bawl:' />

Sansa is easily the most relatable female character.

Maybe for a lot of gals on this forum, but Sansa was almost an alien entity to me. I could NOT put myself in her shoes for all the tea in China. Her ideology was so different from my own (and even the way i was raised), that she just...it took me a LONG time to see Sansa's true worth. She's still hard for me to relate to, but in her, i see someone who can aspire to something great and really kick ass. In her own way, of course. (see my sig link for details.) Sansa is becoming iron. It is sad to see, but also interesting. Excelling at things like Lady Fu (the not-so-martial art of being a Lady and kicking ass in such regard) and Politeness Judo. (The art of kicking ass with a well-placed snark disguised as a polite remark.)

Arya was the one i related to. And i still do. Sansa brings a lot to table, its just harder to see.

#17 Lala

Lala

    A Song of Icecream and Fireflies

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 1,000 posts

Posted 28 July 2013 - 08:16 PM

Off-topic but:

I'm glad HBO sells House Frey shirts. It helps me figure out whom to avoid and/or hit with my car. --Apple Martini


I would totally do this too - if I had a car - and knew how to drive - but those limitations won't stop me from trying

#18 Kittykatknits

Kittykatknits

    Member of the Oppressive Matriarchy

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 5,421 posts

Posted 28 July 2013 - 08:27 PM

I find her clinging to the belief of good in others and making statements like "Knights are supposed to protect women and children" even after being subjected to abuse at the hands of those she believed to be good, fascinating. She survives the Viper's Nest that is King's Landing without becoming a vindictive, bitter woman like Cersei, retaining her kindness and empathy for others.

I think she retains her idealism, tempering it a bit over time.

Dunno. I'm most like Ned and Sam so not sure how that relates to Sansa.

#19 The Ned's Little Girl

The Ned's Little Girl

    Landed Knight

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 409 posts

Posted 28 July 2013 - 08:37 PM

One of the things I like most about Sansa is also the thing that she gets the most grief for: her idealism, her belief in chivalry and the values espoused by the songs and the poems. In a heavily-armed society that where violence is celebrated, having ideals of protecting the weak and helping the helpless are very important! It's the reason why King Arthur created the Round Table - to channel the knights' violent impulses into things that would work toward the greater good. I hope that Sansa can have much the same effect in Westeros.

#20 Florina Laufeyson

Florina Laufeyson

    Lord of Chaos

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • 6,677 posts

Posted 28 July 2013 - 08:41 PM

I think she retains her idealism, tempering it a bit over time.

Dunno. I'm most like Ned and Sam so not sure how that relates to Sansa.

Actually, Ned and Sam are a lot like Sansa in a way. Ned and Sam have a similar amount of naivety as Sansa. Ned looks for the best in people and topples when shown the worst. Sam isnt wise to the world and "his place in it" is often put in question. Much like Sansa. This isnt actually the part of Sansa that i have trouble relating to btw. The part of Sansa that i had a lot of trouble grappling with was her inaction. I was raised to not take shit from anyone, so Sansa's whole "take one for the team" or "lie back and think of England" mentality was really difficult for me to "get". Ya know? Naivety is easy to relate to, no matter how world wise you are. Cuz once upon a time, we all had our heads in the clouds.