madscientist596

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About madscientist596

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  1. "You know who's coming for you. You've always known." --the Hound As much as this line pissed me off in the rant and rave section, it was also pretty bad-ass.
  2. ALthough I blew my load early in this thread I have one additional rant: #boatsex. Naked On a boat In winter Heading north. Think about that for a while. For those of you who are like--uh? you gotta get nekked to do the deed, I do concur. I also know that one can be under blankets, especially if you are (1) On a boat (2) in winter (3) heading north. Gratutitous butt and side-boob was just awkward like there was some fan-porno being filmed there. Possibly by Tyrion. Or ghost. THATS WHERE GHOST HAS BEEN!!! GHOST FILMED SEASON 7!!!
  3. 45 minutes of "Hey, sup dude!" Torumund/Dondarion dead/not-dead? who knows--we ain't got time for that, we need exciting shots of people walking around king's landing Nitpick: KL support a million people? um no. Just no. It may be possible but it always seemed like Westeros was a bit backwards compared to Essos/whatever its called. Meh, I'm angry so I'll call the bluff. No way KL has a million people. Not with all the food they'd have to import. Old Valaryia? Maybe. KL. NO Bran9000--i can see everything....except that Jon's parent's got married. (Yeah I'm ripping that off of Preston's reviews. A man has no shame) Sam: Told my gal to STFU when she revealed an important plot point, now I'm all like "hey guess what Bran9000--you missed something!" Sansa: Hey my sister has been weirding my out for a season so KILL LITTLEFINGER. AWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH PLOT TWIST. Twin peaks this ain't. Although the nice twist of Arya giving the dagger to sansa last week was nice, this just felt forced. It had non of the gravity of say in Gladiator when the emperor's captain of the guard refused to lend his sword. This was just out of left field (even if I knew it was coming. A man is also a spoiler junkie). Viseryion's wings are already decaying? PUH-LEASE. We get it he's an undead dragon, but now he flies super fast with holes in his wings? Fire the CGI people. Cersei in the most bitch move ever betrays everyone in the dumbest way possible. Let plate littlecreeper for a minute---if the north losses then you face down an increased undead army. If they win, you just stabbed them in the back during the most important event in centuries and the whole kingdom is gonna know what a douche you are. A true Tywin would find a way to make HIMSELF the hero of saving the north, Marry Jamie to Dany and then place Emila Clarke in acting school AFTER forcing Jon Snow to take the black again. Jon always keeps his word---except for that whole Night's Watch thing. And the cavesex with Yggrite. And the whole being King to the northern lords. But NOW he finds the truth bone. Or could have said, "I will not declare for this alliance publicly, but when this is over the North will be pledged to Queen Cardboard" Yeah Ned hid Jon from Robert--but it was so OBVIOUS he was hiding something. See also book Rob. Despoils a man's daughter--marries her because honor. Show Robb likes the exotic nurse type. /facepalm. Cersei changes her mind about the army. What did Tyrion say? WOulda been cool if he had appealed to the protection of the unborn child, but nooooooo she does a complete 180 off screen. And what is with Ser Robert Strong "threatening" to kill Jamie. I think he called that bluff. What the hell was that even about. That whole scene was just dumb. Maybe if the started to fight and then Cersei can't bring herself to kill her luva, but this was just ackward. Why the hell was Theon even at the meeting? Does this guy need more screen time or something? Its like "WE need to throw as many chars as we can into this meeting" And if Jon was going, why does 'the north' n eed representation. Ok maybe I can buy that they think Jon is in Winterfell, so Sansa sends Brienne. But this whole Jon doesn't write letters? How about Davos: "Your grace, I may have a fleabottom accent but I can still write a freakin letter once in a while to keep my Warden informed while I #boatsex" Cleganebowl weigh in: He's coming for you. Who is? Jesus? Gretzky? Epic Movie Voice guy? Could we be more vague? Lets introduce new subplot with a single line and be as vague as possible. 1 season left we gotta blow open these plots, not ties them all down. Even the music blew. I remember when I got HBO just to watch the series beyond the book. CANCEL THAT CRAP NOW. (espeically if you jerk me for 18 months before resolving. GRRM is bad, this is as bad). Why don't you all write a Wild Carde Series while we wait. Make it about the confederacy while you are at it. Holy S**t where's the Tylenol.
  4. Well I was re-reading ADWD and Melisandre does see 'Bran' and the 'Three-Eyed-Raven' as The Great Other. Of course this assumes that her vision is of Bran/Raven AND that they are servants of the great other. I put those name in quotes as she sees a “wooden face, corpse white with a thousand red eyes, accompanied by a boy with a wolf's face". SO not out of the realm of possibility, but considering that the NK attacked Bran...maybe not. Then again, maybe Bran is now under NK control. after the 'bad touch'...
  5. This is why we need a like button!!! Also apparently Preston and my dad/mom hung out because WHERE ARE YOUR HATS!!! I still drive with hat and gloves in my car. In Texas (I'm a northerner by blood). Otherwise I'D NEVER HEAR THE END OF IT.
  6. I disagree-- its insulting to the viewer when we do know that Jon (or Jamie--last week) is 'safe' and yet they put a forced 'suspension' into the show. We all know they are coming back next week. Its insulting when regular TV does it, it is still insulting here. So while yes, you can't kill off Jon, this whole teaser thing where the char is 'dead' or in 'mortal danger' --but not really-- rips you out of the immersion of the show. Instead of OMG Jon just went under the water, its 'ok how does he get out of this one'. Tormund was almost decent, but then he got saved at the end. Jorah falling off the dragon? not even a meh. It seems like they all wear plot armor. Even minor characters are safe--they face mortal danger time and time again with no consequences. (Que Sir Galahad and 'just a bit more peril') What made GoT different was plot armor was non-existent. Now its fantasy of the week. And it is apparent that I wasn't the only one who missed them having Dragonglass weapons (and I saw the episode twice00once by myself, once with wife rewatching), but we get a conversation of nicknames for genitalia. 30 seconds last week after the scene in the cell of Jon/Davos handing out weapons would have cleared it up. Its sloppy writing/directing.
  7. GAH! I forgot!! Lets mine all the Dragonglass but make sure WE DON'T TAKE ANY WITH US!!! BAH!!
  8. Yes apparently the laws of thermodynamics cease to exist in Westeros as any fool who fell into that lake is dead of hypothermia in 30 mins. And Benjen shows up because reasons! So tired of these 'epic escapes' Jons in the water because ugh...maybe he is gonna die. But we know he won't. D&D don't have the balls to write that kind of storyline and dont make us care about characters they can kill off. Member when no characters were safe (I member!--Member Sean Bean!!! YEAH!). I was waffling on the Arya thing as I thought maybe arya was playing littlefinger into thinking he was playing arya. But the whole confrontation just made no sense--she's all threatening and then gives Sansa the dagger? uh? ok? This whole thing just fell flat. Then the who succession thing seems like a setup for Jon taking the throne as a successor (I am of the opinion that Dany must die in order for lightbringer to be reforged in S8). But it seems clumsy and out of place. And then the bear? Why? I mean I like bears but this was just derpy. We've only got limited time and I want those minutes back. Didn't push the plot, didn't give us anything except a dead bear and a couple of redshirt deaths. And official old man statement: DOES NO ONE WEAR A HAT IN THIS CONTINENT!!!! ITS WINTER FFS!!! ITS IN THE PROMO!!! WEAR A HAT!!
  9. The Lord of Light Demands it! (and by lord of light, I mean bad plot writing).
  10. Dany can't act. Losses one of her 'chlidren' and has the emotional range of a dumb rock. Jon and Dany have no chemistry. Magic teleportation of ravens/gendry/dany+3 dragons. Deus ex out the ......... Wife wouldn't let me type rant and rave.
  11. Just some historical context--the original warhammers and battle-axe were just hammers and axes. Aka what the common man had lying around to defend himself. So Gendry (as a smith) weilding a hammer is totally the right move. The SIZE (as you point out) is totally off. Even the legendary spartans only had a short sword--Xyphos i think it was called. (along with their big ass spear, but that was becuase they fought as a unit). Romans also typically only used a short sword.
  12. Bronn/Jamie plot armor now with underwater propulsion! Where did all the smiths come from to mine the dragonglass? DId they really just toss the annulment out there. Deus Ex much? Oh its all legit cause he got an annulment. News flash can't anull a marriage with kids. Maybe the laws of Westeros are different, but here we call that a divorce (not Catholic, but pretty sure having kids means you did the deed, so uh...marriage consumated!!). Secret Marriage would have been better (Targs get 2 wives--now with twice the nagging! /male privilege) LF/Arya--so clumsy. This aint SVU/CSI/Sitcom plot of the week. I need me some Dune--plots within plot within plots--like book varys/littlefinger. Arya/Sansa. DEY SAID MEAN FINGS!!! Look i know arya was not keen on the life of a Lady, but one would think she'd understand about keeping the vassals happy. More meh sloppy. Only minor warping but Jon got to eastwatch FAST. Plus Davos in and out of KL faster than Tyrion in a whore house! Tyrion hooks up with Bronn. I guess they were just hanging at the pub for a drink and ran into each other.... A Lannister pays his debts, cept to Bronn! (still) Next Week: Game of Thrones: Suicide Squad (shamlessly ripping this off). Taking odds on deaths: Jon 1000:1 Gendry: 3:1 Thoros: 2:1 Red Sword Guy (Denadrion?) 2:1 Tormund 5:1 Hound 10:1 3 or more extras on screen north o da wall: 1:5
  13. Snape kills Dumbledore.
  14. Ok so despite my spoiler Junkie Nature, I have no concrete evidence about what is occuring. SO best guesses (and a few tongue in cheek references). Jamie and Bronn are both alive and well and uncaptured. (Plot armor) We learn more of Jon's parentage. 50/50 on whether JON learns about his parentage. Sansa and Arya fight (its a trap! for LF!) Bran continues to be unable to act, but has an important vision (possibly related to Jon, but probably related to the NK+WW) I will make a 'Bend the knee' plus Rule 34 reference. (yeah i went there) Yara will appear from whatever hole she was in to be taunted by Cersei/Euron. Dany goes all mad king and burns stuff because FIRE BABY!! (Thus why Varys talks to Tyrion in the trailer) We get the seeds of a possibly Varys Betryal. (Why because why not, his conversation with the red woman + confrontation early in the season make me think he's gonna sell out the mother of dragons, stormborn, breaker of chains, Queen of the Rhoynar, Geats and Swedes.Probably as she has too many titles, and probably as he is not 100% on team Dany in the books. Jon rides a dragon (not the mother of dragons--yet) Sam gets kicked outta the citadel for reading in the restricted section, but discovers an important plot point. Despite Brans bad acting, I really think we need a bit more of his knowledge to setup the final season--Azor Ahai/Lightbringer/Etc. Also we need to understand the consequences of Jon's resurrection---GRRM (George Really Rotten Milestones) has stated that he wanted to write 'Death has consequences' SO I got the feeling that the whole 'took a dagger for his people' starts to play out. A boy can dream. But probably 45 minutes of Cersei talking to the IB dude. Wild speculation--Dany's last betrayal is Dhaario coming with the second sons to fight against her. Seems like a D&D plot point.
  15. Well since my good bad ugly got people's pants in a wad. I'll just do bad and ugly-- Why is Tyrion even at the battle? Not a fan of Dany (more on that in a minute, but why is the hand AND the queen at the fight). Brilliant. Hmm Drogon down!!! lets just land next to the center of the fight, not glide away from the battle. Speaking of which--pulling out the arrow. DER! Pulling out the arrow ON THE BATTLEFIELD. DOUBLE DER Ok so all the ships are gone, but there are enough to ferry all the Dothraki to the mainland. Seems legit. Littlefinger with a Chekov's gun to Bran. Still not liking the 'distant Bran' More like 'Non acting Bran'. My Post My opinion. What was littlefinger trying to accomplish besides plot movement? Doesn't know who it is, yeah like Bran won't catch that by next episode. I think over the last few episodes LF has lost about 100IQ points. HEY EVERYBODY!!! QUEEN DANY JUST BURNED A HOLE IN THE LINE!! LETS NOT ATTACK THERE!!! A Lannister pays his debts, except to Bronn. Apparently that wagon has a +10 bag of magic holding cause no way in hell it holds 10 million crowns/dragons/guineas/whatever. GAH!!! I'm just angry today. Episode was dumb, series is dumb, life is dumb. GRRM is dumb for not writing more and going on tour. Drogon falls outta the sky but recovers at last second. Wow where have I seen this before? Uh every AERIAL BATTLE EVER. Jon got his glass. Dany and Jon made goo goo eyes. Big Fight. Fin. Meh. (the good!! DIE IN A FIRE LANNISTER BOYS!!! heh I love die in a fire)