The Meeraculous Third Reed

5. Not much in the way of anything particularly exciting. The problem is that the producers' favourite characters are too obvious. Last scene, Tyrion and Sansa giggling were particularly awful.

I'm somewhat surprised at all the tens in all honesty. I tend to agree with much of the "official" review (especially regarding the "Oh Shit! It's a trap! Moment). In all honesty, I found the RW somewhat underwhelming. There were a few nice twists (stabbing Talisa in the womb multiple times was pretty shocking, as was Catelyn slitting his wife's throat), but overall, I really didn't feel that much sadness. Obviously I've read it several times before, so the impact might have dulled a bit, and perhaps the burning of the tents next week will bring a degree of gravitas to the occasion, yet for the most part, it really wasn't that effective. Why is this? I think a lot of it simply stems from the fact that I give far less of a shit about show Robb, show Catelyn etc than I do their book counterparts. That's a result of two seasons' worth of poor characterisation, which cannot be saved by piling on the sympathy at the RW. The seeds for the RW should have been sowed months prior. They weren't, and that lessened the occasion for me. There were other things too. Grey Wind dying like a bitch, Arya acting so damned calm about the whole thing. Obviously, the scene did its job; Twitter went apeshit, people will probably be shocked. I can't help thinking though that it could have been so much better. The Bran/Rickon scene did far much more for me emotionally than the RW. I think the separation was done nicely, I liked the way that Jojen and Meera took a back seat to allow the Osha/Rickon/Bran relationship to flourish. All in all I thought that bit was fantastic (maybe seeing the attack through Summer's eyes would have made it even better, but meh). All the other scenes were fine (there is only so much you can do with choreographed sword-fights). I gave it an 8. I should've given it a 7. It was by no means a 10. Breaking Bad 3X12/13, 4X13 are tens. The Wire 2X11, 4x12/13 is a ten. This was not a ten.

I gave it a 4. I honestly feel that was generous. So much filler. My god. Almost every scene was just played out for seemingly no reason. That's to say nothing bad about the acting (Iwan Rheon is good. Damn he is good. I just wish he could play a more likable character), just that so much of it served little purpose. Secondly, the changes from the book in this episode were truly truly awful. Gendry storyline? Pass. Utterly ludicrous. This marriage notion? Likewise. Can't remember exactly, but have Willas and Garlan now been retconned? Just so silly. Continued white-washing of Tyrion and Cersei? Just really really annoying. Is Jojen being an epileptic in the books? Even Varys and LF are getting boring. LF is my favourite favourite character, and it's just so annoying to see him (not Varys, Varys never reveals anything to him) just throw stuff out there for Varys to hear. Yes he's more likely to be frank with Varys, a man with whom he shares both respect and disgust for and knows is playing much the same game at him, but ffs, LF has literally spent years carefully honing a public persona. Aidan Gillen deserves better. Jaime, Roose and Brienne were good. As was the aforementioned acting of Rheon. Nothing else did it for me at all.

Oh my god. Never would have clocked that without you pointing it out. I gave a 6 last week, and felt it was a bit low. I'm giving the same this week, even if I thought the episode was ever so slightly worse. Pros: Pretty much every new character introduced hit the right notes with me. Anguy and the Reeds in particular. Acting continues to be 95% very good. Sansa, Jaime and Brienne, BWB scenes all hit their mark and were enjoyable to watch. Also, the Marg/Joff scene dragged a bit but Jack Gleeson is a damned good actor. Cons: Nothing particularly exciting happened for the second episode in a row. Tyrion shoehorned into the episode for no other reason than he's a fan favourite Catelyn speech was just silly. Few others but I have a headache right now.

Ok, let's go. I gave a 6, but I'm wavering as to whether it should be a 7. Then I remember the Fist scene.... Pros first: Margaery. Yeah-huh. I've read Ran's analysis of the episode, and he's not really sold on either Dormer or the angle they used for this scene. I see his point, but don't agree completely. Firstly, I think that Dormer did a good job in her scenes, having not been at all convinced by her in season 2. Meanwhile, I see the criticism attached to the scene at the Flea Bottom orphanage (that it doesn't fit with the time period), but I don't think that Margaery's actions are that out of place. I'm pretty certain that there are anecdotes of monarchs such as Elizabeth I conversing with and mingling with "low-born" members of society. The idea of political spin was prevalent way back when too. I also think there is a need to establish that the Tyrells are indeed playing the Game. We never get a POV from them, and much of Cersei's perfectly valid criticisms lie behind too many layers of egomania and paranoia. I also thought the dinner scene was good. Joffrey reminds me more and more of Nero. Tyrion/Cersei/Tywin- Well acted, well crafted scenes. You could argue the Cersei/Tyrion one was necessary, but I think they're really trying to emphasis Tyrion's isolation, both politically and from his family. Kraznys was very good, as were the visuals of the Giant, the Dragons etc. Weaknesses: RIP the characters formerly known as Catelyn and Robb Stark. Extend this to Littlefinger as well. The beauty of Sansa's escape lies entirely in the shock the reader gets at "hearing" LF's voice, then having him emerge from the shadows. Removing Dontos and essentially refusing to acknowledge the presence of either Varys or the fact that LF conversing with Sansa in the open would place suspicion upon a man whose primary motto is to keep one's hands clean. I mean, I can just about see the logic behind this if it looks like they're throwing a curveball (should LF tell the Small Council about Sansa's betrothal to Willas when it comes around), but even so, show LF is a poor imitation of his literary counterpart. The Fist debacle. I've seen this criticism elsewhere, but it's perfectly valid. Why bother going to the trouble of making the massive CGI White Walker army and then doing jack with them? It just seems a complete waste. The plotholes regarding this storyline were also incredibly frustrating. Why is Ghost with the NW? It makes no sense. Likewise Mormont chastising Sam. Oh, Sam didn't get the ravens off in time? Well maybe that's because he was made to go out on patrol. Away from his ravens. The ravens that were supposedly his only job. Anyway, if he didn't get the ravens off, so what? Are they dead now? Because if Sam didn't get them off they're probably still on the Fist. The scene just made no sense. Waiting to pass judgement on Mance and Tormund, but that scene was ok, as were the Davos scenes. It's been indicated that the episodes will get progressively better. Let's hope so, because there is much to improve upon.

I'm thinking of something along those lines. Maybe a bit too obvious though. Barristan mistrusts him, so you'd assume he'd have something inside the city as a reserve. The Green Grace on the other hand...... The Great One's ego is only big because he justifies it. He's no trumped-up Yunkishman. If anything is to be made regarding a bird connection and The Great One, it probably refers to his sigil (Mockingbird). I don't really think these theories have much credence though. The Hound has technique though. I'm in agreement with pretty much all of this. I'm far more inclined to see Jorah as Barristan's killer though. Man holds a grudge. She knows his name, and doesn't really have much of a reason to kill The Great One. Chin up. Just means that TWOW will be all the more exciting. Just to confirm, these were excerpts and not full chapters yes? I see Barristan's army eventually pulling through, but there is no way the battle will be as easy as it seems to be going in the chapter mentioned.

Surely if Podrick is alive then so is Hyle?

Not a bad call at all.

Really CBA with pros and cons really. Roughly a 7 as a TV show, a 3 in terms of being faithful to the books. Lot of the changes piss me off now, I really think I need to start separating myself from the books mentally.

Really CBA with pros and cons really. Roughly a 7 as a TV show, a 3 in terms of being faithful to the books. Lot of the changes piss me off now, I really think I need to start separating myself from the books mentally.

No point doing my usual pros and cons, because almost everything in this episode was perfect. The shot of the wildfyre burning the ships was beyond anything I've ever seen on the small screen. What I would say above anything else though is that Lean Headey was amazing. Better than anyone else, and that is saying something. My only minor gripe is the seeming reluctance to connect Sansa with the Old Gods. The difference in religion is important. I am barrel scraping though. Just a damned good episode. Another thing. Sophie Turner is already damned attractive, and me realising that makes me feel a little dirty.

Lol. He's based on a man who did exactly that in real life.

Ah, the old "purist" shtick. Because criticising the fact that Osha walked past Theon and Dagmer in broad daylight is being a book purist. Silly me.

Oh sorry I must have missed that clear differentiation in your original post.

Right, of course. No criticism can be forthcoming from us laypeople. How dare we have the gall to view a piece of drama with a critical eye.

Why does it have to be "on-camera"? I've never understood this need for everyone to understand and see everything that goes on. One of the great strengths of ACOK was the lack of Robb, not because I dislike the character and so forth, but because there was always a degree of tension to be maintained through having him away from the narrative directly. Catelyn's fears for him were ours, and I was always interested to hear what was going on in the West, but I didn't need to see it. I've already noted that I sympathise with Robb. However, the reason for him betraying his word to the Freys and momentarily shirking his responsiblities as King of the North and the son of a respected man in Ned Stark should be stronger than him wanting to get his dick wet. Is it said he was under the influence of the Poppy in the books? I'll read through later, but I always felt that he was injured at the Crag, cared for by Jeyne for a period, before falling into her arms following him finding out about Bran and Rickon. That really doesn't fit a porn scenario for me. Maybe I'm visiting the wrong sites. As is implied in the books. Just because you're not shown it directly, doesn't mean it didn't happen. I'm able to contextualise and judge poor writing and scripting as such.

In order to pass through the Twins, Robb vowed to marry a Frey. It was as close to a vow as it gets really. How much he wanted to do it is somewhat irrelevant really, but by doing so it showed us two things. 1. He understands the vital importance of the Freys. 2. He is willing to make necessary sacrifices, the kind that the Warden of the North must undertake in order to rule with honour and decency. If Robb didn't vow to marry a Frey, how did he pass through the Twins? The point I'm making is that his reasoning behind breaking the agreement/vow with the Freys is now inherently flawed, and paints him as little more than a whiny little douche. I'm sure I'm not the only one who sympathised with Robb when he told Catelyn why he married Jeyne in the books. He was distraught at the death of his brothers, and did not want to dishonour Jeyne by nobbing her and then simply moving on. Compare this with "omg ur rly sweet and honrble becoz u r nt lyk uva nobl girlz pls u hve a gd ass". He's throwing away his kingdom for no other reason than his wish to get his dick wet. I imagine most people out there have had the chance to hook up with someone they felt was hot, but the circumstances surrounding said hot individual were not great. Most of us as a result would probably, you know, not go there. We are just normal laypeople, and still exerted this thing called willpower. Book Robb had a genuine emotional reason to go there with Jeyne, show Robb is almost impossible to sympathise with on this issue, especially considering what he has to lose by doing what he does. Honestly the whole Robb+ Tulisa/Jeyne thing could not have been more poorly scripted and plotted.

No. No it really wasn't. "I don't want to marry a Frey".... *banging*

As most weeks will testify, I have been pretty generous with my marks, usually ranging between 6 and 8. Therefore, I consider the following semi-rant to be somewhat justified, and is only partially affected by my bias towards the books. Firstly, I shall run through the plus points, sparse though they were. Varys and Tyrion and Cersei. All good, intense scenes. Lovely to see Varys back. Jaime and Brienne was fun to watch, even if I am seething at the reason he was let go. Blackwater will I imagine be a spectacle. I am looking forward to it. Now, my gripes. My general gripe is that not letting people know that Bran and Rickon are "dead" simply doesn't make sense. Why on earth did they keep it out of the plot? Let's put aside book purity here. Both Catelyn abd Robb have been made to look like weak individuals because of B+R's deaths not being revealed. Catelyn's treachery (and it is pretty much safe to call it treachery now) is now barely justifiable. As for Robb, what can you say? That whole scene I was literally saying aloud "don't do this, this is silly, this is silly, this is pointless". Why would the King in the North spend so much time with this girl? Why would they set up these rubbish one to one scenes? How can they not realise that the death of a young man's brothers would be a far more powerful emotional justification for him to break his solemn vow to the Freys rather than the mewings of an admittedly hot girl? It is just stupid beyond belief, and full of gaping plotholes. I understand a small part of this is based on my love of the books, but in one fell swoop they have simply rendered these characters far less sympathetic, and not more as they were clearly trying to do. Why on earth would Osha risk being out in the open? Seriously. Another idiotic plot hole. Following that, why would Luwin follow her down there when out of anyone in Winterfell, he is the one Theon would most likely keep the closest guard upon. This is just stupid plotting. Are the Wildings deaf? If not, how could they not hear Qhorin and Jon talking out loud, in the open? Daenerys scene was pointless. Arya's acting ability and characterisation is poorly served by the relative tameness of her escapades. Perhaps I need to watch it again with a less critical "book-centric" eye, but in all honesty, I don't think it would make a difference. The huge plot holes are not caused by the splits from the book, they are simply being caused by atrocious writing. A 3.

Ahhhhhhhhhh a big footnote to my original post. A huge potential mark decrease now hangs over the release of the Kingslayer. If he is released prior to the news of Bran and Rickon's death, then this is a fatal error. It is the reason as to why Catelyn frees him. To provide any other reason is farcical. If this occurs, episode and series take a massive blow.

I'll go through my usual pros and cons. Just a disclaimer first. Some of the rating will be based on the fact that until I see changes enacted in a positive way, they are considered slightly negative, enough to take off roughly a point. Pros: Acting. All round it was almost uniformally good.Minus (IMO) Emilia Clarke. Special shout out to Nikolai Coster-Walder. He IS Jaime. Likewise I doff my hat to Ygritte. All the scenes round Robb's camp. Today that storyline finally became worthwhile. Karstark placed in very well. It also now gives us a reason for Robb being away from the camp (and Catelyn) when he hears of Bran and Rickon's "deaths", and subsequently falling into Jeyne's arms. Though they did say he was coming back at dawn, so that might be delayed an episode. Either way, it was good. The death of Alton Lannister was also very surprising. I didn't expect it. Generally most of the other storylines were good, minus a couple that I shall discuss imminently. I'm also adding an extra mark for that shot of Harrenhall. Great great shot. Cons: Jon Snow is semi-incompetent. This annoys me. He is a future lord commander and he keeps on getting bettered. Admittedly I get the feeling he may escape next week (and as such can reunite with the Halfhand in a satisfactory way), but still. It vexes me. Also, how did Ygritte ever get the attention of the Wildlings that surrounded Jon? Qarth. I don't necessarily mind the Dragons being stolen, but Pyat Pree has become some fucking superman, and the murder of the rest of the Thirteen makes no logical sense. Also Emilia Clarke's acting. I'm genuinely torn as to whether she is purposely trying to make Daenerys the whiny moron she becomes now or whether it's just simple bad acting. I hope it does end up that Bran et al return to the Crypt. I want Theon to have been properly outfoxed, and not just missed them via bad luck. Also, not a con so much as yet to be confirmed, but I hope that Luwin knows about the bodies the same as he does in the book. Yara is back next week. So I shall give it an 8 overall.

I am torn. In the end I'm opting for a 7, though it should be much higher. Pros: Theon. Alfie Allen is so annoyingly good as Theon I am worried he will soon take the place of the character I have in my mind when reading. Rodrik's death was worked in pretty well too (though I am perhaps a little worried this will make it a little harder for tv viewers to sympathise with Theon later, seeing that a TV show cannot provide the inner monologue which is prevalent within much of ASOIAF), and in general that scene was just a great bit of television all round, from the acting to the camera work. Very good. The riot. Again, good acting. Obvs we have to suspend our disbelief they wouldn't be on horses, but other than that, it worked very well. Re. Myrcella crying, I really don't think it would be too far-fetched for a young girl to cry when being seperated from her family (though perhaps she would wait until she was out of sight). The acting of Dance and Williams. More on the content in a bit. Cons: Jon and Ygritte. My main (and only) problem with this part is the execution. Or the failed execution. Simply put, we are unaware of why Jon missed. As such, we are being led to believe (if we also consider the Craster incident) that Jon is semi-incompetent. A semi-incompetent future Lord Commander. However, an explanation (an explicit explanation) as to whether he did it on purpose will settle this. Amory Lorch's death. It works to some degree of sense. It provides a reason as to why Arya doesn't choose Tywin. It also suggests that Jaqen is pretty awesome at his job. It may also give Tywin a reason to leave before Arya can order his death. In every other sense though, it failed. I think the writers feel the need to shoehorn in Harrenhall action scenes, when in truth this is not needed at all. Littlefinger's teleportation. As for Daenerys. On the one hand, we are seeing earlier than the books what a whiny little brat she is. On the other, the killing of all her staff (by one man it's implied) seemed wholly unnecessary. Just stealing the Dragons would have made far more sense (Pyat Pree could then also have used his stealing of the Dragons without violence as a necessary pretext in order for Daenerys to visit and therefore fully understand the importance of the House of the Undying).

Pretty good. Generally good acting all round, but mega kudos to Maisie Williams. Also I like the fleshing out of Margaery at this early stage. I don't mind the Halfhand being short, and I understand the need to flesh out Qarth a bit, so I'll let these minor things slide. A few minor gripes- Asha. This character could not be more of a fail. Dagmer- Only because to me he is Finchy from The Office. No Reeds :(. Though I have read somewhere they will enter in season 3. A solid 8.

I'll give it a 7.5, leaning towards an eight. Good points: Tyrion blah blah as I repeat every week. Joffrey's acting is brilliant. I'm rather indifferent to the whore scene as a whole, but he was great. Opening scene was good too. Harrenhall looked great, and the scenes there were enjoyable too. Negatives: Littlefinger acting like a whiny little douche and trying to sleaze on Cat. It simply displays a level of stupidity that his character doesn't have. I find this more annoying that anything else so far. Also, to those wondering about the girl on the battlefield with Robb, something to consider.

SO much better than last week it's almost untrue. I'll go with the standard positive and negative lists. Pros: Tyrion as per, kudos goes to the way in which the "You can't tell" scene was filmed. Very good. Balon and Theon. Fantastic acting, and the burning letter scene was absolutely fantastic. Arya's scene was a very good interpretation given the assumed budgetary and temporal constraints. General acting from Cersei in the scene where Tyrion reveals his plans for Myrcella. Brienne seems well cast. Cons: The Night's Watch scene made Craster knocking Jon out rather pointless really. Jon could have just mentioned it to Mormont as they left IMO. Asha is a petulant child with all the allure and attitude of a damp rag. Sorry, I just really do not like this piece of casting. I'm rather indifferent on the whole Renly/Loras thing. I don't think it needs to be as fleshed out, but I also think it served us with establishing Margaery's intelligence now rather than later. All in all, a strong 8.5