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About Pebble

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    Happy drunk and winning!
  • Birthday 11/25/1977

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    Dublin - Ireland
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  1. TitanCon 2017: 8-10 Sept - Belfast

    ooh it will be fun. and great to have you. Its a small, friendly Con, and very relaxed. This year programing (not just lit night) starts on the friday afternoon for the first time ever. although If you can only make one trip across the pond in the next few years, I'd suggest waiting till 2019. there is a really good chance Worldon will be in Dublin and TitanCon has a bid for EuroCon for the following week. Of course this don't mean you can't do both. In other news I have finally booked my room. Gee I am slacking this year guess thats what happens when I don't worry over badge number.
  2. UK Politics Unexpected Election edition

    Oh there is always a possibility the Conservatives don't win with a Landslide. unfortunately for me that counts as a major surprise. I guess its also possible Jeremy Hunt could have difficulties depending who is opposing him although I suspect he's in a rather safe seat.
  3. Well the US is not exactly that enthusiastic about investing in Mental health either.
  4. I'd be outraged if it happened somewhere that wasn't America. I'm just too tired of it to care much about US gun violence, when the US don't even want to try to fix it. I'd rather put my energy into things that maybe will make a difference. You can't help an Addict until they actually want help.
  5. I'm not sure if Gun laws and school security are a bigger issue than male privilege. They are all big issues and I think often rather overlapping in many area's. however I think male privilege may be an easier problem to solve or at least make progress on.
  6. Some of it might be the media and the "glorification" of the culprit. His name, picture and any views he had get shown to everyone. I have a theory that if every time we replaced the culprits name with "some twerp" and did not identify him in any way to mention his manifesto (whatever - or mention as a vague little footnote) but concentrate the reporting on the vicitms and what they did, and what they stood for. It might help? The other thing you could do is invest in mental health. but hey that costs money and sounds like evil socialism. I feel for the parents of the children and hope the 9 year old has a speedy recovery. I'm just so so tired of it, I don't have the energy to be outraged anymore. I know now that nothing will change. the US will try nothing, and the same shit will happen again and again.
  7. Twiglets, they are knobbly breadsticks coated with marmite. ;Probably a British specialty. In the unlikely event your making to Worldon this year, I'll bring some for you to try. Herward is obviously in the Hate it camp. Marmite you either love it or hate it, there is no middle ground.
  8. marmite does not taste of yeast. thats like saying beer tastes of yeast. Yeast is necessary for making both but they taste very different. I used to love marmite. but now it tastes so salty, probably cos I've cut so much salt out of my diet. I wouldn't say it tastes beefy although its kinda similar to Bovril in taste which is made from beef so... Scott have you ever tried twiglets?
  9. Look its very simple. The guy in my date did not believe what he was telling me was rape. He did not think there was anything wrong with having sex with someone who repeatedly says NO. because they really want it even if they think they don't. He does not think there was anything wrong with his behavior. I'm sure if he thought there was something wrong with it, he wouldn't have told me so openly what he intended to have sex with me even if I objected cos thats not rape. He thinks every man that is not gay acts the same way. that this is normal. And women automatically agree to have sex just by being in a mans presence. and thus because its normal behavior it can't be rape or wrong in any way. Yes this was an extreme case. but something made him think this is normal, and what everyone does, so there is nothing wrong with it. He learnt this from somewhere. and that is Rape culture. Not knowing what consent is is rape culture. Ignoring consent is Rape. He did not rape me. I was lucky, but I am certain he would have if he had the chance, and I'm certain I was not the only person he did this on. Getting someone drunk so they can't say no then having sex is rape. saying the woman was kinda asking for it because she was drunk is rape culture. It was rape culture that allowed him to think that way. and not just to think that way but tell me over dinner because he can't see any reason why I could possibly have a problem with that. If he had got the message from society that what he was describing as ordinary behavior of every man was in fact Rape and something that most men are not like that, then maybe he would have re-evaluated. Yes he may still be the type of guy to rape people, but he would at least on some level understand its wrong. Most people who break into homes and steal your stuff know its wrong and a crime but still do it anyway. they don't think its their right just cos your house happened to be in front of them. Rape culture is about the things that happen to make rape not rape in the minds of the would be rapists, and to provide excuses for rape happening.
  10. I went on several dates with other people from that date site without being the least be concerned over what my date might do. So this was the rare one of the bunch. but it was the way be basically told me that he would rape me if he got the chance, and that its not rape and such behavior is normal and what everyone does. that was and is the really frighting part. This whole thread has brought back a lot of the feelings I had for a long time afterwards. there are so many people here who don't get rape culture. although I am given a lot of comfort by all those men speaking out about it. I think we are making progress.
  11. About 15-20 years ago I had a date with a guy I met from a dating site, who over diner after I declined going back to his place after the meal calmly explained to me that he was a Man and as a Man had a Mans impulses and desires, and just by being in his manly presence meant that I obviously wanted to have sex with him, even if I don’t really know it at the time. Oh and I should not be surprised by this as every man thinks exactly the same way unless they are gay. Oh and yes he kept trying to top up my wine glass and moaned whenever I chose to drink the water instead. I think he genuinely thought it was not rape unless you were physically fighting them off and screaming your head off and if you pause for breath then it’s a bit doubtful. I smiled sweetly, nodded and was very careful of what I said and did. That evening seemed to drag on forever. And he made several attempts to get me to agree to sex most of the time just a minute or two apart. After we had paid for the dinner I did my very best to leave in the opposite direction. But he insisted on coming with me and making sure I was safe. I can tell you I totally did not feel safe. But eventually I made it to the train. I only got to leave after I told him that I really did like him, but I had to get back as I had made plans that I totally could not change as people where depending on me. But I would love to see him again real soon. Once I got home, I curled up and cried. He did not know my home address we only my mobile phone number we had agreed to meet at the restaurant. I got several texts from him, each one got progressively worse, I was called a bitch slut friend zoning whore and if he ever saw me again he would claim his due. I owed him for the meal and the time he spent with me. I just want to point out that I made sure to pay half the cost of dinner. I’ve never told anyone about that night before, at the time I was frightened, scared and very ashamed. I was ashamed of how he looked at me. How he could talk to me like I was an object and very ashamed that I put myself in that position. Part of me felt I should of reported him, but I felt I wouldn’t really be believed and that he hadn’t actually done anything illegal and that somehow the whole thing was my fault. As time went on, I just wanted to put it behind me and pretend it never happened. I never used a dating site again. I know what happed was not my fault. I know that now. I also know I was lucky. If I had drunk a little bit more before he revealed himself or if he had put anything in the drink.
  12. Hugo time! Hugo time! Roundup for 2017 Awards

    Hugo finalists have been announced
  13. An I-CON of Thrones (NYC area convention)

    I'm glad your event went well. FYI there are far more anti-show crazies than anti-book crazies on this site. or at least those of us that make it out of the show section of the board. A lot of us haven't even made it into the show section.
  14. As someone who was born in 1977 I can tell you I and no-one I know was killed or injured by the IRA. I can also say the same right now of Islamic Terrorism. However I personally felt far more threatened by the IRA and I felt it more likely that I might get blown up by the IRA during the time of the troubles than I do right now because of Islamic terrorism. I also felt that being Bombed by the IRA far more likely than being Nuked by Russia for that matter. I never visited Ireland, republic or Northern until several years after the good Friday agreement. This may be down to the fact that although most of the violence was happening in Northern Ireland, which meant I was mostly safe unless I just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time,, There were still regular bombing on mainland England. and far more bomb warnings. although the incidents may have been happening at approximatively the same frequency (I've no idea if this is correct) as Islamic Terrorism today in the Westeren world, those incidents are spread over a much greater percentage of the world, making my individual chances of being killed far less. Also although I don't personally know anyone who was killed or injured, I know several people who where caught up in the bomb warnings and evacuations and the chaos that caused. We where also far more likely to hear 3rd hand stories of other peoples experiences. For instance my cousin was almost shot by the IRA we think, lucky for him when he was stopped at a road block by masked gunman he was travelling in a car with his friend who had a strong Irish accent, and did the talking. So in short, It was always a fear in the background and something you where aware off but got on with things anyway. That fear went away after the peace process looked like it was actually working. and it didn't really come back certainly not as noticeably. I'm far more worried Brexit could lead to boarder controls back on the Irish boarder and that could trigger a new round of Troubles. than I personally worried about Islamic Terrorism.