Good Guy Garlan

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About Good Guy Garlan

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    Alester Florent's longhall, drinking Alester Florent's wine

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  1. So Mance would've still tried to kill Bran (or another one of the Stark kids) even if Jaime hadn't pushed him out the window?
  2. I think it's implied that Petyr pointed Joff in that direction. And it makes sense too: Ned was a huge loose end, and he knew that Petyr was a two-faced weasel. Petyr couldn't let word of that reach Cat, or anyone, really.
  3. My theory? Varys has him killed. He can't risk Ned telling Robb or Cat or Edmure or Yohn Royce or whoever about the twincest because that would kickstart the war Varys is trying desperately to stall. I actually think Varys/Illyrio might have hired Jaqen to make sure Ned suffered an "accident" on his way to the Wall, but of course Joff screwed all that plan and poor Jaqen found himself chained with some criminals and without his target.
  4. I think she'll be somebody's Nissa Nissa. Here's my theory: - Beric Dondarrion used only his blood to light his sword on fire. - Those reanimated by R'hllor are said to have his fire inside them. Ergo, their blood is inflammable somehow, hence why Azor Ahai needed to plunge the sword in Nissa Nissa's heart. So, that's assumption #1. Assumption #2 would be the foreshadowing when Stannis is burning the Seven at Dragonstone. They're clearly meant to represent at least some Starks, the Mother standing in for Catelyn. And, you guessed it, the statue has an actual burning sword through the heart. So, we have that Stoneheart is likely to be stabbed in the heart, but who's gonna do the stabbing? Well, there are a couple of people on a crash course with Stoneheart who are the prime suspects: Brienne and/or Jaime, who, in the latter's dream, were brandishing actual flaming swords. Personally, I'm leaning more towards Brienne doing the deed for several reasons. I'm not saying she's Azor Ahai reborn, but in the AA myth he did have to kill a lion before killing Nissa Nissa. So I think Stoneheart might command Brienne to kill Jaime (the lion) herself to test her loyalty (I think Brienne will fake this, only wounding Jaime or via some other plan to fool Stoneheart), and then Brienne's gonna take advantage of Stoneheart trusting her once more to stab her in the heart.
  5. You know what would be crazy? If Varys' real name was Aegon and he was talking about himself.
  6. I think, if Ned had been smarter, he should've legitimized Edric by altering Robert's will in his deathbed. Then, using Renly's connections to the Tyrells, he should've brokered a marriage between Edric and Margaery. Renly would then be free to marry someone else (Ysilla Royce? Gwyneth Yronwood? Sansa?) for political gain. Stannis would be pissed as hell but he would have to go suck an egg because as far as he'd know it'd all be perfectly legal. Here's a "what if" scenario for you: What if you didn't comment on threads you obviously hate? Nothing of value would be lost, that's what would happen.
  7. In addition to what everyone's said upthread, killing Pycelle creates extra chaos since he testified publicly about Margaery's moon tea and pissed off Mace, and he himself was paranoid about it. It adds even more mistrust and doubts.
  8. Hide yo daughters, hide yo sisters, cause Brandon Stark is rapin' everybody out here
  9. I'm in no way or form minimizing the effects that the forced abortion could've had in Lysa, but I think in time she might've healed from it all and put it behind her had Hoster not forced her into a loveless marriage with such an older man. If she'd been in a healthier, loving relationship then maybe she would've gotten over Littlefinger and his poisonous influence. Now that I think about it, a Lysa-Jaime marriage could've done so much good for both of them: Jaime would've stopped his toxic relationship with Cersei and Lysa would've married someone with a full set of teeth.
  10. Edmure >>>>>>>> Robb - Robb leaves the North at the mercy of the Ironborn and wildlings. Edmure goes against the grain and shelters his peasants in his own home. - Robb breaks off a crucial betrothal because he couldn't keep it in his pants. Because of that, Edmure, though no fault of his own, has to marry a Frey girl and he actually goes through with it. - Okay, Robb defeated Jaime at the Whispering Woods and took some subpar Lannisters by surprise at Oxcross. Very impressive. Well, Edmure fought tooth and nail to defend his turf and his people and became the only character in the series who defeated Tywin Lannister in battle.
  11. See, for me it's the other way around. I think Jon in the books 1-3 is a whiny brat/generic fantasy hero and in Dance he's just a bore. Mediocre acting aside, I think the older Jon in the show is more believable and tolerable.
  12. They really don't. Those two chapters are legit terrible and killed a big chunk of my hype for Winds.
  13. You play someone with a mental illness*, you get an Oscar. * While the Academy is partial to mental illnesses, they'll also settle for other fashionable diseases such as AIDS or ALS. And I guess cancer's always a favorite, though I'm told it's less so now than in previous years as it's seen as more of a Lifetime thing and therefore a less prestigious disease compared to, say, Alzheimer's.
  14. Well, I respectfully disagree. I honestly think most of Feast is filler in the sense that the novel ends right when most storylines are about to take off. Like, we know Sam's storyline really lies at Oldtown, not at some random Summer Islands ship. So why did it take us an entire book to get there? That's particularly jarring when you remember it took Cat an offpage chapter to get from Winterfell to KL back in AGOT. You could cut all 3 of Sansa's chapters from Feast and literally nothing of value would be lost. You could start with her Winds chapter, which is clearly where her storyline's at, and you'd hit the ground running. Same with Jaime, same with Brienne. I mean, jesus, we know the true important part of Brienne's plot lies with Stoneheart, not with Nimble Dick. That detour to the Whispers has got to be the most clumsy and obvious filler since Naruto. A lot of Feast was just GRRM stalling and spinning his wheels because he still couldn't get all his characters where he wanted them too, so instead of like trying to advance the plot, he entertained himself with the ASOIAF equivalent of side quests. I suppose writing from the POV of Damphair or whatever was fun for him and helped him take his mind off the Meereenese Knot for a while, but it wasn't fun for me. Feast is, at its core, a book of avoidance: is GRRM avoiding the difficulties of the main plot and focusing instead on a handful of half-baked characters. It was a way for him to stall and buy himself a few more years to continue the story. If that's not losing control of your story, I don't know what is. I do agree with this, though. It's super funny to me to read GRRM's reasoning for splitting up the characters because he wanted to tell the complete story of half the characters instead of half the story for all the characters. Well, George, pray tell, which character's storyline is complete in Feast? Jaime ends on a cliffhanger, Brienne ends on a cliffhanger, Arya ends on a cliffhanger, Cersei ends on a cliffhanger, Sam ends on a cliffhanger, Sansa ends on a cliffhanger. The way Feast ends is just incredibly arbitrary, like GRRM said "Done, I think we have enough pages now, print this."
  15. Hotah, Victarion, Damphair, Jon Connington, Quentyn, Sam.