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GOODKIND VIII: It's Not Terrorism If We Do It!


Werthead

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It was quite funny reading the mental effort Richard had to go to in order to think up a false name... not the quickest thinker, is he? :lol:

But the thing that stood out for me in that quote was that clearly Mr G has never actually swung a sword, nor even read anything by anyone who has. Research? That's for the weak! :P

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Come on guys, I think you really lack moral clarity ! Well, it's OBVIOUS that a warrior is superior to an army of soldiers PROVIDED this warrior has moral clarity. Thus the example of the Gauls and the romans is complete BS : all it shows is that the Gauls lacked Obviously Moral Clarity. If they had had Richard Rahlorix as a leader instead of this evil Vercingetorix, the roman empire would have been turned into ashes.

Really I don't know how you cannot understand that ! But, yeah, I forgot Wizard's first rule. '

BTW, t'would be nice to see a parody figuring the Wildlings (yeah, the Freee folk, they must have moral clarity ) if it has not been done yet. I'm not good enough to do it myself, I'm afraid.

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Come on guys, I think you really lack moral clarity ! Well, it's OBVIOUS that a warrior is superior to an army of soldiers PROVIDED this warrior has moral clarity. Thus the example of the Gauls and the romans is complete BS : all it shows is that the Gauls lacked Obviously Moral Clarity. If they had had Richard Rahlorix as a leader instead of this evil Vercingetorix, the roman empire would have been turned into ashes.

Really I don't know how you cannot understand that ! But, yeah, I forgot Wizard's first rule. '

BTW, t'would be nice to see a parody figuring the Wildlings (yeah, the Freee folk, they must have moral clarity ) if it has not been done yet. I'm not good enough to do it myself, I'm afraid.

:rofl::rofl:

But then they'd have fought Jagangius Caesar,...

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Hmm, maybe the Great Yearded One took inspiration for the movie from this or this...

As to the last QotD: I think Terry's prose has hit rock bottom - and started to dig...

I'm tempted to track down a copy of "The Passion of Ayn Rand" just to see if she gets horribly flogged and then crucified. Cuz that'd be kinda sweet. Even sweeter than Jeebus getting it, and I ate popcorn the whole way through that.

MinDonner, brilliant as always. Your parodies are always a great way to start the morning. :lol:

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I haven't studied Objectivism closely, but I read this one a few years ago:

http://www.jeffcomp.com/faq/wrong.html

That was a good read. The guy writing this is basically bashing Ayn rand and her followers because of they way of judging other people.

From what I understood their ideas go this way:

axiom: there is only one truth.

reasoning:

- I am right. I see the reality. I know the truth.

--> If anyone disagree with me they are wrong.

- If someone is wrong it's because he refuses to see the truth

-> if someone refuses to see the truth he's dishonest and in conscious open conflict with truth and reality

--> if someone is consciously dishonest, then he's evil.

thus: anyone who disagrees with me is evil.

corollary: Only your ideas are important to determine if what you do is evil. As long as you don't shy away from the truth of reality (and there is only one) then all your actions become righteous.

Now this does indeed explain a great deal about all these QotD. In TG's mind, anyone not agreeing with him is wrong and evil, because of their refusal to aknowledge he's right (a bit circular, but heck). For everyone else it shows TG and co as self righteous fanatics who cannot be reasoned with.

Do I have that right? :D

Now back to Richard: So, in the end, he's indeed magically invincible, always right and the best at everything he does. Yet the enemy wants him to help them in some game instead of killing him right where he stands? :huh:

When the good guys capture an enemy who just killed comrades, they torture him then kill him, no matter if he's a child or a a civilian, clearly this puts them above the -collectivist- scums who offer a man who killed tens of friends a place in their rank as a star player. :|

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@Dunhallym:

I wonder what would have happened if Sitting Bull&co were less lacking in the moral clarity department...

Or could one ask whether Cortez, Pizzarro, et al had an obvious moral clarity against the respective enemies? I wonder what Terry's opinion would be on this.

@mormont:

It was quite funny reading the mental effort Richard had to go to in order to think up a false name... not the quickest thinker, is he?

But the thing that stood out for me in that quote was that clearly Mr G has never actually swung a sword, nor even read anything by anyone who has. Research? That's for the weak!

Well, Richard obviously wanted to come up with a false name that still proves his moral superiority over the IO soldiers (btw, don't those guys have a description of him? I mean, sword-swinging maniacs in black war wizard outfits should not be too hard to spot).

As for research: you would do well to remember, that the spirits of Richard and Kahlan have contacted the writer previously, so maybe that's where he got the fighting style informations...

A bit off-topic: I wonder why noone claimed that these guys only want to slander Terry (BBHN) with their filthy products and obvious name-slandering...

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Good morning and welcome to the Terry Goodkind Quote of the Day! I know everybody has been waiting with great anticipation for the triumphant return of Princess Violet, and here it is.

To bring you up to speed, in Chainfire Richard traded the Sword of Truth to Shota the witch in return for info about what may have happened to Kahlan. Shota then gives the sword to her pet troll Samuel, who used to be seeker before Richard. Later, Samuel escapes, steals one of the boxes of Orden from Sister Tovi (of the Dark). He also later stabs Chase and kidnaps Rachel, taking her to a cave where Violet is waiting with a witch named Six. That’s right, you heard me, Six. Violet goes on to prove that Richard isn’t the only one who can talk all bloody day. Get it all? Good.

Rachel’s jaw dropped.

It was Princess Violet.

“Well, well, if it isn’t the orphan Rachel come back to us,†Violet said as she stuck the torch in a bracket on the rock wall before taking up a place beside the woman in black. <Six>

Rachel’s eyes felt like they might pop out of her head. She couldn’t seem to make her mouth close. Her voice had fled down into the pit of her stomach.

“Why, Violet, dear, I do believe you’ve scared the little thing witless. Lose your tongue, little one?â€

Princess Violet was the one who had lost her tongue. But now it was back. Somehow, as impossible as it seemed, it was back.

“Princess Violet…â€

Violet’s back stiffened as she straightened her broad shoulders. She seemed to be half again as big as the last time Rachel had seen her. She was meatier-looking. Older-looking.

“Queen Violet, now.â€

Rachel blinked in astonishment. “Queen…?â€

Violet smiled in a way that could have frozen a bonfire.

“Yes, that’s right. Queen. My mother, you see, was murdered when that man, Richard, escaped. It was his doing. He is responsible for my mother’s death, for the death of our beloved former queen. He brought us all nothing but grief and terrible times.†She heaved a sigh. “Things have changed. I am queen now.â€

Rachel couldn’t make it work in her head. Queen. It all seemed impossible. Mostly, though, it was dumbfounding that Violet could again speak after having lost her tongue.

A humorless smile spread on Violet’s lips as her brow rerw down. “Kneel before your queen.â€

Rachel couldn’t seem to make sense of the words.

Violet’s hand came out of nowhere, striking Rachel so hard that it knocked her sprawling.

“Kneel before your queen!â€

Violet’s shriek echoed back and forth in blackness. […]

Violet’s smile had vanished. As she stared down at Rachel kneeling before her, her eyes narrowed in a way that made Rachel have to swallow.

“He attacked me, you know. Back when he was Seeker, Richard attacked me, hurt me, for no reason.†She planted her fists on her hips. “He hurt me bad. Attacked and hurt a child! My jaw was broken. My teeth were shattered. My tongue was severed, just as he had once promised to do. I was left mute.â€

<blah blah blah, >

“Six gave me my tongue back. Gave me my voice back. The seeker thought he had taken all of that from me, but now I have it back. Tamarang is safely in my hands.â€

<snip>

“Violet-“

Smack.

Before she had time to think, Violet had struck, seemingly out of nowhere, as if she had been waiting for an excuse. Rachel’s vision swam sickeningly. It felt like the blow might have knocked teeth loose. Rachel gingerly felt with her tongue before she was sure they were all still in place.

“Queen Violet,†Violet growled. “Don’t make that mistake again or you will be put to torture as an instigator of treason.â€

Rachel swallowed back the lump of terror. “Yes, Queen Violet.â€

Violet smiled at the triumph. She was indeed the queen.

Rachel knew that Violet had a taste for only the most exquisite things, the most elaborate decoration, whether it be draperies or dishes, the most beautiful dresses, and the most precious jewels. She insisted on surrounding herself with the best of everything-and that had been back when she’d only been a princess. That made it seem all the stranger that she would be in a cave.

“Queen Violet, what are you doing in this awful place?â€

Violet stared down at her a moment, then waggled what looked like a piece of chalk before Rachel’s face. “My heritage, my inheritance.â€

Rachel didn’t understand. “Your what?â€

“My gift.†She shrugged offhandedly. “Well, not exactly the gift, but something akin to it. You see, I come from a long line of artists. You remember James? The court artist?â€

<snip, James drew a spell around Richard in WFR to grab him for the Mord-Sith, but Richard killed him>

“He shared some little trace of the royal bloodline. That exceptional bloodline carries a unique gift for…artistry. The family of the rulers of Tamarang still carry the thread of that ancient talent. My mother didn’t have the ability, but through that bloodline, it turns out that she did pass it along to me. At the time, though, the only one we knew of who still had that rare talent was James. Thus it came to be that he served as the court artist, served the crown, my mother, Queen Milena.

“The Seeker, the previous Seeker, Richard, before he caused the trouble that resulted in the murder of my mother, also murdered James. Our land was for the first time in history without the services of an artist to protect the crown.

“At the time we weren’t aware that I, in fact, carry the ancient talent.†She gestured to the tall woman beside her. “Six saw it in me, though. She told me of my remarkable ability. She has been helping me learn to use it, guiding me in my…art lessons.

“A lot of people were opposed to me becoming queen-some, even, among the crown’s highest advisors. Fortunately, Six told me of the covert plots.†She lifted the chalk before Rachel’s face. “The traitors found drawings of themselves down here on these walls. I made sure that everyone knows what happens to traitors. With that, and with Six’s help and counsel, I became queen. People no longer dare oppose me.â€

<snippety snip>

Violet smirked. “You see, Rachel? What need have I of those old, useless advisors? Could they have accomplished any of what I have accomplished? You see, unlike those weak people you threw in with, I always persevere until I succeed. That’s what it takes to be a queen.

“I have the box of Orden back. I have you back.†She waggled the chalk again. “And I will have Richard back to face his punishment.â€

~Terry Goodkind, Phantom

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You see? So Richard should have killed Violent when he had the chance! He was doing the right thing after all by kicking her in the face, and it's just a shame that he didn't finish her off! How wrong we were to doubt the words of Goodkind (BBHN). Now she's grown up and all evil, and it's all our fault. I feel so ashamed.

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And that doesnt even work. In wars and fighting collective>indiviuals. Soldiers beat warriors every time, just let the Gauls tell you about that! I mean, thats not even a point of argument - purely military, an orderly army of soldiers (that is, a "collective") will always fare better then a horde of warriors (that is, of individuals).

Hey, what about Asterix and Obelix? They kicked the crap out of those Roman collectivists. Obviously the magic potion was just a metaphor for moral clarity. So obviously individuals > collective. I guess comics is what passes for history in the Terryverse :P

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Is goodkind having a go at painting now? :unsure:

Don't you know he's most famous as an artist! :tantrum:

I wonder when he will incorporate his training as a Formula 1-driver in the series :unsure:

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Time to pick this thing apart.

Her voice had fled down into the pit of her stomach.

First off: your heart drops into your stomach (as it usually goes). Your voice sticks in your throat. In your throat.

Princess Violet was the one who had lost her tongue.

Um, yes. Yes, we know. We were all trying to forget how. Thanks for ruining all those years of therapy!

She was meatier-looking.

:sick:

Mostly, though, it was dumbfounding that Violet could again speak after having lost her tongue.

*sigh* Yes, we know. Violet is speaking again! Wow! WE KNOW ALREADY! The Yeard is exceptionally good at repeating the same story point over and over and over again.

“Queen Violet,†Violet growled. “Don’t make that mistake again or you will be put to torture as an instigator of treason.â€

So treason is calling someone by their first name? EVERYONE in these books are jackasses. Or maybe Goodkind is the only one.

That exceptional bloodline carries a unique gift for…artistry. The family of the rulers of Tamarang still carry the thread of that ancient talent

Artistry? The ancient gift of artistry? Someone get Goodkind an editor, stat!

Seriously, give your "non-fantasy magic" some other "clever" name. Rune-drawing, sign-casters, something! Good God, man!

Also, the terrible punishment for traitors is that they're thrown in a cave and made to look at badly-drawn chalk descriptions of traitors in a cave?

It's so retarded it makes me laugh. Goodkind is truly a master "novelist". Remember, he does not deal in things so trivial as fantasy!

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I love it how TG wrote "Smack", and then explained it, instead of just writing the explanation. It made the scene so much more vivid to me.

And Violent's explanation of the treasonous people who she had to eliminate sounds an awful lot like Richard's diatribes against anyone opposed to him. I think she might be an Evil Objectivist: "You see, unlike those weak people you threw in with, I always persevere until I succeed."

Is perservering until you succeed close to "deserving victory" ? I wonder if Richard and Violent are going to have a speech-off, and at the end Richard will just rip her jaw off, and beat her and Six to death with it.

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Tears of joy no doubt! For the Greatness that is Goodkind. Do you not see when you put Goodkind out of your thoughts the morally reprehensible choices you make? Drunkenness? Fraternizing with questionable women? (Life is the future, not the past, Werthead.) These are all because you ignored the inherit truthiness Goodkind's teachings. You allowed passion to rule reason, and forgot the only sovereign you can allow too rule you is reason.

I think it's time to start referring people from this thread to the 'Objectivisits Anonymous' programme... ;)

Bad Wert indeed. Now swear loyalty to Richard, I mean Terry, or I will be forced to torture you for the good of humanity.

:stunned:

Oh how wrong you are. It is known that Phantom alone has sold 50 million so far. It has been translated in to 250 languages. There are more copies of it in print then the bible.

Do not be fooled. Unlike our beloved Richard Rahl, Richard Myahew in Neverwhere almost completely lacks moral clarity. Goodkind (BBHN) would hate Richard Mayhew, with the same furrier that he loves Richard Rahl. Though he may be able to appreciate that Mr. Croup and Mr. Vandemar, have some moral clarity…

I live, but my life is a headache.

I cannae help the one-line post. A sozzled Wert is a beauty to behold. :cheers: I am sure he's going to *facepalm* when he rereads his post in the morning. :P

Naah, still stand by it. I am a stranger to shame. Hence the shirt I'm wearing at the moment.

Time to pick this thing apart.

First off: your heart drops into your stomach (as it usually goes). Your voice sticks in your throat. In your throat.

I could be wrong, but I think Goodkind was trying to rip off the infamous Robert Jordan Thogism ("Egwene's stomach dropped into her feet,") but then decided to change it for fear of looking idiotic. Didn't work.

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Now, see, what strikes me about this QOTD is the fearless use of cliche after cliche.

Barely a sentence goes by without one. 'Rachel's jaw dropped', ' "Well, well, if it isn't the orphan Rachel" ', 'Rachel's eyes felt like they might pop out of her head', 'Violet's hand came out of nowhere' (used twice), it goes on and on.

But Mr G is clearly aware that this is an issue, so he tries to mix it up a bit and come out with some original metaphors and similes. Unfortunately, they're terrible. We've already had mention of the 'voice fleeing to the pit of her stomach' (has anyone ever experienced this sensation? No, I haven't either). 'Violet smiled in a way that could have frozen a bonfire'? Uh, bonfires don't freeze!

This is just awful in terms of the actual quality of the writing. High school standard at best.

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Sad thing is, in way of writing quality, Goodkind bottoms out with Paolini.

And story? At least Paolini is just trying to write a typical fantasy story and fails. Goodkind is attempting to impart his wisdom upon the masses and fails terribly (in both the wisdom and story departments).

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Artistry? The ancient gift of artistry? Someone get Goodkind an editor, stat!

Seriously, give your "non-fantasy magic" some other "clever" name. Rune-drawing, sign-casters, something! Good God, man!

You're forgetting, this is the mighty Yearded one. If he can describe Richard's power as a "thing," we're doing pretty well to get a name as descriptive as artistry...

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Artistry? The ancient gift of artistry? Someone get Goodkind an editor, stat!

Seriously, give your "non-fantasy magic" some other "clever" name. Rune-drawing, sign-casters, something! Good God, man!

Also, the terrible punishment for traitors is that they're thrown in a cave and made to look at badly-drawn chalk descriptions of traitors in a cave?

Could be that he read something about how the cave paintings in Altamira and similar places had a religious, or magical meaning to the cavemen - and lets face it, cavemen art is ancient. Hmm, just like the style&cliche-mongering of a certain writer of fantasy that is not fantasy...

Could the paintings actually represent a kind of sympathic (sp?) magic?

Could it be, that...

No way, that would be, like, fantasy.

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