Guy Kilmore Posted November 12, 2015 Share Posted November 12, 2015 http://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2015/nov/12/utah-judge-orders-baby-taken-away-from-lesbian-foster-parentsSo during a routine foster care hearing, a judge in Utah orders a baby to be removed from a lesbian foster family to a heterosexual one. I'm waiting for more details, but as it stands this really gets my goat. We already legalized gay marriage, let's move on for once. The second though, I work with a foster care agency and foster parents are a rare commodity. It is difficult to find anyone who will take in someone else's children, not to mention children who have probably underwent some significant trauma. This judge just created a situation where we are making a limited resource more limited. Also to have kids bounce around between foster parents ends up just traumatizing them anew. This whole thing, on the surface, seems very absurd. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robin Of House Hill Posted November 12, 2015 Share Posted November 12, 2015 It is Utah and that is Mormon territory. In view of the LDS Church's stand on LGBT issues, it wouldn't surprise me that the judge is following his "deeply held religious belief", rather than interpreting the law. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robin Of House Hill Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 My friends on Facebook, know that my partner and I were married at the Beverly Hills Courthouse, yesterday. There is a detail that might be of interest, here.The judge who married us, told us that he and his husband had been married there, before California's Proposition 8, and that they had been together for 25 years. Not being reluctant to brag, I told him we'd been together 31 years. I wonder if he told that story to those whe were not same sex couples.Oh yeah, one other thing. In the party of the couple carried before us, was a very well known Academy Award winning actor. Since I believe celebrities are entitled to privacy, I won't say who, but I will say he was quite dignified and cordial to all who waiting for their ceremonies.Unfortunately, I did do one stupid thing. When I posted on Facebook that we'd been married, I took the precaution of making the post visible only to friends, but when FB asked who I was with, I added her name, forgetting it would put the post on her timeline (and in the news feed of her friends). The problem is that she comes from an Irish Catholic family and some of them are real wingnuts. And while they've probably always thought we were going to hell, now they probably think we're going to a worse neighborhood, there. Apparently, I can no longer be trusted to keep secrets. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deedles Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 Congratulations Robin. I hope you and your lovely wife enjoyed your wedding. I'm sorry her family are being crap, but if her Irish Catholic family are like the ones I know, it would have been something, the lgbt is an obvious target but they just like drama. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TrackerNeil Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 Hey, congrats! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seli Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 Congratulations Robin Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maltaran Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 There was a trans actress in tonight's Doctor Who episode. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xray the Enforcer Posted November 14, 2015 Share Posted November 14, 2015 Congrats Robin! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TerraPrime Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 their ceremonies.Unfortunately, I did do one stupid thing. When I posted on Facebook that we'd been married, I took the precaution of making the post visible only to friends, but when FB asked who I was with, I added her name, forgetting it would put the post on her timeline (and in the news feed of her friends). The problem is that she comes from an Irish Catholic family and some of them are real wingnuts. And while they've probably always thought we were going to hell, now they probably think we're going to a worse neighborhood, there. Apparently, I can no longer be trusted to keep secrets. I saw that status and did a double take on your tagging her full name. But I didn't want to make it an even bigger issue so I kept mum.Irish Catholic you said? Give them some whiskey and guilt and they'd be too busy to judge. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robin Of House Hill Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 I saw that status and did a double take on your tagging her full name. But I didn't want to make it an even bigger issue so I kept mum.Irish Catholic you said? Give them some whiskey and guilt and they'd be too busy to judge. LOL! Well, her brother-in-law is an Italian Catholic, who believes the Pope's farts smell like roses. To be honest, yesterday, my brain wasn't functioning. What started out as an idea, many months ago, to simplify inheritance and next of kin issues, somehow got more important than that. After all, we've been together for 31 years, having a piece of paper from the state, sanctioning it, shouldn't have made a difference, but I got emotional and felt I had to indicate I wasn't at the courthouse, alone. So, I forgot what would happen if I tagged her.Fortunately, she isn't mad at me. A number of her relatives have voice congratulations, so hopefully, there won't be a negative impact. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TerraPrime Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 A number of her relatives have voice congratulations, so hopefully, there won't be a negative impact.On come on, Robin. You know damn well there will be blow-backs from some of her relatives. Just a matter of severity and timing.But you know what? Fuck'em. You are now legally married and your assets are protected by these laws. They can stick their prejudice up their secondary voice box. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rocksniffer Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 On come on, Robin. You know damn well there will be blow-backs from some of her relatives. Just a matter of severity and timing.But you know what? Fuck'em. You are now legally married and your assets are protected by these laws. They can stick their prejudice up their secondary voice box.ye gods i have not felt so motivated to agree with a post til now.... i agree with Terra, Robin...fuck 'em and then turn your head and move on from them...my Number One niece has been with her wife for 35 yrs...since they were in high school together...and only in the last few yrs has everyone else gotten on board...and the ones that haven't are missing a hell of a ride...congrats here (as i said on facebook) i hope both of you are as happy today as you ever hoped you would be...cause i am happy for you and wish i was in sunny CA to tell you that in person !!!so sayeth the sniffer... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
all swedes are racist Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 Oh snap, congratulations Robin! Casa de Lobster will be raising a toast to you two tonight! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robin Of House Hill Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 On come on, Robin. You know damn well there will be blow-backs from some of her relatives. Just a matter of severity and timing.But you know what? Fuck'em. You are now legally married and your assets are protected by these laws. They can stick their prejudice up their secondary voice box.Well, she's gotten congrats from cousins, an aunt and an uncle, as well as one of her sisters and husband. The other sister and her husband won't be happy and that couple is the one that that likes me least and is also closest to her father, who is pretty advanced in age. So, she's not anticipating cheers from them. But she's basically saying, it's out there and whatever will happen, will happen. Her reaction to this type of thing is a lot better than mine. I'm just kicking myself because my lapse in judgment could impact her.And before I forget, thanks all, for the good wishes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deedles Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 Terra, forgive me for bringing this up here, but I don't see a "feedback" thread as such. Could you consider asking ran to turn off the automatic gender identifier. I don't like it. I don't see the point of it. Some of my favourite moments have been where some blowhard mistook the gender of someone on the board (once you I think). I don't like having people automatically give less weight to others opinions by "virtue" of gender, regardless of how subconscious it is. And, as can be seen in this thread, sometimes even the possessor doesn't know Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TrackerNeil Posted November 15, 2015 Share Posted November 15, 2015 Terra, forgive me for bringing this up here, but I don't see a "feedback" thread as such. Could you consider asking ran to turn off the automatic gender identifier. I don't like it. I don't see the point of it. Some of my favourite moments have been where some blowhard mistook the gender of someone on the board (once you I think). I don't like having people automatically give less weight to others opinions by "virtue" of gender, regardless of how subconscious it is. And, as can be seen in this thread, sometimes even the possessor doesn't knowI think you can change your gender to "not telling." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TerraPrime Posted November 16, 2015 Share Posted November 16, 2015 Thanks Deedles. I was mulling over that myself. Will bring it up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NestorMakhnosLovechild Posted November 16, 2015 Share Posted November 16, 2015 Well, she's gotten congrats from cousins, an aunt and an uncle, as well as one of her sisters and husband. The other sister and her husband won't be happy and that couple is the one that that likes me least and is also closest to her father, who is pretty advanced in age. So, she's not anticipating cheers from them. But she's basically saying, it's out there and whatever will happen, will happen. Her reaction to this type of thing is a lot better than mine. I'm just kicking myself because my lapse in judgment could impact her.And before I forget, thanks all, for the good wishes.Congratulations!!! Give yourself permission to be human and make a little mistake without beating yourself up over it. You've certainly earned it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kojiro Posted November 16, 2015 Share Posted November 16, 2015 I think you can change your gender to "not telling."In fact, that's what I have mine set to. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robin Of House Hill Posted November 16, 2015 Share Posted November 16, 2015 I might be wrong, but I think what Deedles was referring to, is the display of one's gender on every post, rather than its inclusion in the member profile, where nothing has changed from the old forum version. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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