Littlefingers In The Air Posted August 4, 2015 Share Posted August 4, 2015 Y'all continue. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tempra Posted August 4, 2015 Share Posted August 4, 2015 I hate investing a ton of time in a guy when I have no idea if he's going to be good in bed or not. Discuss. Be easy? Problem solved. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Melphis Amekia Posted August 4, 2015 Share Posted August 4, 2015 Whatever floats your(or anyone's) boat, Chats, as far as I am concerned. I've got another date next week. Should be pretty fun. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Littlefingers In The Air Posted August 4, 2015 Author Share Posted August 4, 2015 I share your concern. That's why I do my best to be awesome in bed, so at least one of us is putting on a show. If she's great, all the better. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KiDisaster Posted August 4, 2015 Share Posted August 4, 2015 I hate investing a ton of time in a guy when I have no idea if he's going to be good in bed or not. Discuss. Do one of those couples questionnaires in Cosmo or something for your first date. Nothing can more accurately determine bedroom proficiency than a Cosmo questionnaire. Really though, sounds like a bit of a Catch-22, Chats. :dunno: Am I using that wrong? I'm probably using that wrong. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DreamSongs Posted August 4, 2015 Share Posted August 4, 2015 Continuing from the last thread... I am not tied to my phone. Mine frequently dies and I don't even realize it until I haven't received a call for a couple of days. I have a car charger, but it is in my winter emergency kit. Not all of us live and die by constant incoming content. eta: Maybe I should start dating again. At 47, I have a different perspective. I'm looking for companionship rather than a mate to raise kids with. That totally changes the playing field. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elder Sister Posted August 4, 2015 Share Posted August 4, 2015 I don't live and die by my phone, especially when I'm outside doing stuff. But I do have a watch, and I do live and die by that. My calendar is insane. At work, if I don't have my phone, I don't know where I'm supposed to be or when. I try extremely hard to not be one of those managers that Kal mentioned in the last thread that are constantly late. Between work, church, 12 step stuff, and personal time, I am overbooked to the point of ridiculousness. Regarding dating, I have some fun stuff going on. It's nice to be sought after. I officially have a date with my friend in Seattle, and I think it's going to be fun! :D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DreamSongs Posted August 4, 2015 Share Posted August 4, 2015 I don't live and die by my phone, especially when I'm outside doing stuff. But I do have a watch, and I do live and die by that. My calendar is insane. At work, if I don't have my phone, I don't know where I'm supposed to be or when. I try extremely hard to not be one of those managers that Kal mentioned in the last thread that are constantly late. Between work, church, 12 step stuff, and personal time, I am overbooked to the point of ridiculousness. Regarding dating, I have some fun stuff going on. It's nice to be sought after. I officially have a date with my friend in Seattle, and I think it's going to be fun! :D I'm trying to stay away from the 12 step stuff. It adds more drama than I need in my life. eta: Its not that I have an issue with it, but 12 steps in my town is very much Christianity-based and I get PO'd easily. I started going back a couple of weeks ago and decided that I wasn't done. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elder Sister Posted August 4, 2015 Share Posted August 4, 2015 I'm trying to stay away from the 12 step stuff. It adds more drama than I need in my life. I have been doing it for so long I don't even think about it; and I avoid the drama. But I can assure you I won't be dating anyone from there. ;) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DreamSongs Posted August 4, 2015 Share Posted August 4, 2015 I have been doing it for so long I don't even think about it; and I avoid the drama. But I can assure you I won't be dating anyone from there. ;) Oh hell no! That is always a disaster waiting to happen! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DreamSongs Posted August 4, 2015 Share Posted August 4, 2015 That is terrible Chataya. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TerraPrime Posted August 4, 2015 Share Posted August 4, 2015 Re: Chats My experience is that talking to them about sex can reveal a lot. Some sexting, too, can help. If someone is freaking out on me when they hear rimming, then I know we aren't in the same game. Of course, you can get false negatives, where the person is actually good in bed but bad about communicating it. But no method is 100% success. You can also spot the bullshitters who try to claim more experience and skills than they actually have, because they will eventually tell a story that you know is not likely at all. I call that the Penthouse letters syndrome. But then, for your preference, I think you're wanting more a casual non-monogamous date, so maybe such naked talk of sex is the wrong signal to send. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Relic Posted August 4, 2015 Share Posted August 4, 2015 I hate investing a ton of time in a guy when I have no idea if he's going to be good in bed or not. Discuss. It's all part of the game. Too bad we don't all walk around with scorecards. And not just for sex, but things like driving, cooking, ability to wait patiently without freaking the fuck out, and so on. Maybe a "boring-odometer" as well. Anyway, this swings both ways. I once dated a very conservative (sexually) hottie that had some strict rules on sexual contact. I should have known i was walking into a bad situation but she was so freaking cute and cool to chat with. Anyway, date three we finally start making out and her tongue just invades my mouth like a freakin german blitzkrieg AND IT WON'T STOP. I'm tasting her breakfast, her previous day's breakfast. and probably the breast milk she was fed as baby too. It was totally disgusting. The poor girl had NO idea how to make out properly. After that trauma we started hanging much less, i just couldnt bring myself to endure another mouth rape, and i had no idea how to gently tell her that she had no fucking clue wtf she was doing. One drunken night we ended up in her bed and it turned out kissing wasn't the only thing this girl had no idea about. HOWEVER, i don;t consider it time wasted. Just another silly little story about life on planet earth. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xray the Enforcer Posted August 4, 2015 Share Posted August 4, 2015 [mod] Deleted a trolling-sparked derail. [/mod] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dbunting Posted August 4, 2015 Share Posted August 4, 2015 Someone who is truly good in bed should be able to elevate the other person. So, to me, if you can't enjoy it, maybe look in the mirror and see if you are helping or hurting. Also, if that is a key you are looking for then you should start the "relationship" off with sex and then decide whether they are companion worthy. All depends on what is more important to you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
karaddin Posted August 4, 2015 Share Posted August 4, 2015 You can't inspire good sex skills in someone who only cares about their own pleasure, something true of a disturbing number of guys. Maybe I shouldn't be surprised when so many people don't think sex is pleasurable for women, a self fulfilling prophecy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arch-MaesterPhilip Posted August 4, 2015 Share Posted August 4, 2015 It's kind of hard to tell if someone is good in bed or not. Unless of course you know someone who can vouch for the person in question. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Prince Alexander Posted August 4, 2015 Share Posted August 4, 2015 I have never heard of anything good that comes from trying to please someone in bed Either you click naturally, or you don't I would hate for a woman I'm dating to do something to please me, that she does not enjoy herself naturally Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kalbear Posted August 4, 2015 Share Posted August 4, 2015 Prince Alexander, I thought you didn't like sex? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Prince Alexander Posted August 4, 2015 Share Posted August 4, 2015 Prince Alexander, I thought you didn't like sex? That's unrelated, no? And I said I don't like it that much, not that I don't like it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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