Are you emotionally attached to these characters?

[IMNHAAO]

It is probably a stupid question, I realize that, but for some time I have been thinking if the few that, like me, feel no real attachment to the ASOIAF's characters are really so few. Of course I have feelings of compassion, irritation, like or dislike towards them, I am not that cold, but there is no real affection and, of course, not real hate.

 

It has become even more evident this morning. The last book of my favourite series, by my favourite author, with some of my favourite characters is out. Even being plagued with my usual insatiable curiosity a part of me doesn't want to read it. It's hard to face the fact that there won't be any new stories, that I won't see anymore certain characters but on re-reads. Of course I have been reading about these characters for a very long time, but the same might be said about ASOIAF's.

 

It is so strange. I can see and recall countless situations that are heart-wrenching in their own right, these characters have depth, some have me pity them a great deal, even of the ones I dislike the most I can recognize the hardships, and still I don't care.

 

At the end of the day the point is that GRRM has me by the head, but the heart is untouched. Maybe there is nothing wrong about it. I still wish I cared though.

[Scootaloo Stark]

Same with me. I never cry during any movie, show or book. Or show any other emotion. But I think about it a lot. All I feel while reading is joy because the book are awesome, that's it.

[Rider on the Storm]

Wow. Well I find really hard NOT to be emotionally attached to some of these characters. Like, I truly believed in the North rebellion and when the Red Wedding came I cried for Robb and Cat, and I still do whenever I watch the scene on the show. I was shocked and I couldn't sleep much that night. 

Now I feel terribly attached to Sansa, Sandor and Brienne. I truly fear for their fates and I wish them the best possible ending. Of course, you can't feel this way with ALL of them, but some, you know...they somehow occupied a spot in my heart, even if they are fictional and everything...they feel so special to me. It's funny that, talking about Sansa, I don't really like her and I used to hate her, but I feel so involved in her story and I love her, even if i don't like her...don't know if this makes sense!

[IMNHAAO]

Wow. Well I find really hard NOT to be emotionally attached to some of these characters. Like, I truly believed in the North rebellion and when the Red Wedding came I cried for Robb and Cat, and I still do whenever I watch the scene on the show. I was shocked and I couldn't sleep much that night. 

Now I feel terribly attached to Sansa, Sandor and Brienne. I truly fear for their fates and I wish them the best possible ending. Of course, you can't feel this way with ALL of them, but some, you know...they somehow occupied a spot in my heart, even if they are fictional and everything...they feel so special to me. It's funny that, talking about Sansa, I don't really like her and I used to hate her, but I feel so involved in her story and I love her, even if i don't like her...don't know if this makes sense!

Feelings are inherently illogic so who cares if they make sense. :smug:

 

The red wedding is terrible, it is exceptionally written and haunting and I slept like a baby after reading it because at the end they were character I liked (well Greywind over all, and also Robb, I despised Cat instead), but I don't know, for me it's as if I see that there is emotion in the situation, but I would have the same feelings if it had been any other character.
When you see the love around these characters it is a weird thing to not care at all.
 

[Lost Melnibonean]

I know it's silly, but I wish I could protect the Stark girls. I feel I owe it to The Ned. I have a feeling their final reckoning is goimg to be very tragic. I was very happy to see the big gravedigger finding peace on the Quiet Isle.

[~~~~~~~~~~~~~]

I was thinking about this subject just last night. I am in the midst of a Game of Thrones re-read.  I have been paying particular attention to Catelyn because I have been trying to track down exactly where her first breakdown really began.  I won't go there now, however, as I was reading, I started thinking about some of the characters that are now gone.

 

I was amazed to discover that I really did have an emotional investment in these characters and in fact, I felt really bereft knowing that so many were going to be gone.  The characters are developed so beautifully!  Then we are completely blindsided by Bran's being pushed off a window ledge by Jaime.  All of a sudden, the game is on!  We don't know what to expect anymore but if a child is the first victim, what then can be even worse?

 

Ned's beheading was worse.  Bran still lives.  The Red Wedding was an assault on the emotions.  It was horrifying on so many levels and if it wasn't bad enough, Catelyn is resurrected as some monstrous entity bent on revenge.  This would make more sense to me if all of her children were actually dead.  So, not only do we have to live her pain in her death scene as she watches Robb murdered she rakes the skin off her own face, kills Jinglebell then has her own throat slit, we then have to relive it as Lady Stoneheart makes her appearance and she is bent on killing other characters that we have become emotionally invested in!  W. T. F. ! 

 

All of this as we are told of Sansa's cruel abuse at the hands of Cersei, Joffrey, various members of the King's Guard.  She is made to betray her family, hide her grief, pledge her love and fealty for the monster that murdered her father.

 

We watch as the child Arya believes that her actions while trying to save herself will make her mother and brother not want her back.  Her story is heartrending!  This little girl who keeps trying to recreate a family (pack) and is finally left alone.  She is so brave in her grief.  She grows up so fast, but still, she is a little girl hoping for magic to bring her father back.  Could you bring back a man with no head?  Just the once?  Little Rickon completely lost as to why everyone in his life that is supposed to take care of him has left him.  

 

This is all happening in the present tense, but then, there is this tragic back story that is given to us in degrees which permeates everything else and is always on the periphery but never fully explained.  

 

I was thinking of all of these things and much more and I realized that even though I am fairly adamant that I not cry for fictional characters who will never feel anything really and will obviously never cry for me, I think GRRM has battered us emotionally and almost physically. I read this forum and some of the threads and I feel like as fans we are all really devoted and have waited much too long for any closure whatsoever.  Death isn't even final it would seem, so we can't even count on that for relief.

 

So, yes, I would say that I am very attached to the characters both good and bad and all parts in between.  I am sorry I ever started watching the show because I don't want to know what is going to happen before George writes the ending.  I will be watching though because I'm an addict. I have a compulsive need to know.   How can one be addicted to such a thing as a book? 

[Raving Stark the Mad]

I would say "yes".  That I do have emotional investment in some of the characters in ASOIAF. 

 

But I would say that my level of emotional investment is extremely low compared to some of the empathy and sympathy I have witnessed from some others.  A Storm of Swords is the first book I have ever thrown while reading, and I've read a lot, over many years.  That said, I started back reading in an hour, and never really complained about the turn of the story.  I didn't start tearing or lighting my hair on fire or setting the interwebs ablaze.  I'm an old man, it would be unseemly, and I still have real shit to worry about, so I don't need to start being upset over characters.   

[TeamSmallPaul]

I am a fan of all the characters, but not on an emotional level.  There are things I like and things I dislike about most of them (that is, those characters with enough development to form any opinion whatsoever).

 

I am more attached to characters that didn't really have a say in their demise.

 

I don't know what Small Paul did to get sent to the wall, perhaps it was simply because he was simple?  Not sure if there is anything in the text regarding that.  Anyway, I was sad to see him die, but it was an "Aww, bummer" type moment, nothing that kept me up at night.

[Liz Stark-Targaryen]

Far too emotionally attached to many of them (see my signature), but not in the same way that I was to characters when I was younger. 

 

Also, because George Martin has made no secret of the fact that anyone can be killed in his universe, that takes some of the edge off. It means that I'll consider any of my faves surviving canon in any form a victory, but it also takes away some of the shock and suspense. After Ned's head came off, and then the Red Wedding, I think the danger is that the initial shock of a character dying is taken away. No sane reader of this series would be shocked if anyone didn't make it.

[Taenqyrhae]

I think it's a sign of immaturity or mental illness to get emotionally attached to fictional characters.

[Raving Stark the Mad]

I think it's a sign of immaturity or mental illness to get emotionally attached to fictional characters.

You didn't cry when Ole Yeller got shot?  What are you, a robot? 

 

I think there is something of a "golden mean" when it comes to empathizing with fictional characters, or at least a "silver range".  Excess in either direction, excess emotional attachment, and complete lack of empathy, is probably a sign of a possible problem. 

[~~~~~~~~~~~~~]

I think it's a sign of immaturity or mental illness to get emotionally attached to fictional characters.

A good writer can make anyone get emotionally attached to their characters.  I got a lump in my throat when Bambi was wandering the woods calling for his mother after she was killed.  I am not emotionally immature nor mentally ill.  I am definitely not emotionally or intellectually invested in anything you have to say on the matter, however, you are entitled to your opinion.

[Lion of the West]

I'm pretty attached to my favorites, I'd say.

[Avlonnic]

I was thinking about this subject just last night. I am in the midst of a Game of Thrones re-read.  I have been paying particular attention to Catelyn because I have been trying to track down exactly where her first breakdown really began.  I won't go there now, however, as I was reading, I started thinking about some of the characters that are now gone.

 

I was amazed to discover that I really did have an emotional investment in these characters and in fact, I felt really bereft knowing that so many were going to be gone.  The characters are developed so beautifully!  Then we are completely blindsided by Bran's being pushed off a window ledge by Jaime.  All of a sudden, the game is on!  We don't know what to expect anymore but if a child is the first victim, what then can be even worse?

 

Ned's beheading was worse.  Bran still lives.  The Red Wedding was an assault on the emotions.  It was horrifying on so many levels and if it wasn't bad enough, Catelyn is resurrected as some monstrous entity bent on revenge.  This would make more sense to me if all of her children were actually dead.  So, not only do we have to live her pain in her death scene as she watches Robb murdered she rakes the skin off her own face, kills Jinglebell then has her own throat slit, we then have to relive it as Lady Stoneheart makes her appearance and she is bent on killing other characters that we have become emotionally invested in!  W. T. F. ! 

 

All of this as we are told of Sansa's cruel abuse at the hands of Cersei, Joffrey, various members of the King's Guard.  She is made to betray her family, hide her grief, pledge her love and fealty for the monster that murdered her father.

 

We watch as the child Arya believes that her actions while trying to save herself will make her mother and brother not want her back.  Her story is heartrending!  This little girl who keeps trying to recreate a family (pack) and is finally left alone.  She is so brave in her grief.  She grows up so fast, but still, she is a little girl hoping for magic to bring her father back.  Could you bring back a man with no head?  Just the once?  Little Rickon completely lost as to why everyone in his life that is supposed to take care of him has left him.  

 

This is all happening in the present tense, but then, there is this tragic back story that is given to us in degrees which permeates everything else and is always on the periphery but never fully explained.  

 

I was thinking of all of these things and much more and I realized that even though I am fairly adamant that I not cry for fictional characters who will never feel anything really and will obviously never cry for me, I think GRRM has battered us emotionally and almost physically. I read this forum and some of the threads and I feel like as fans we are all really devoted and have waited much too long for any closure whatsoever.  Death isn't even final it would seem, so we can't even count on that for relief.

 

So, yes, I would say that I am very attached to the characters both good and bad and all parts in between.  I am sorry I ever started watching the show because I don't want to know what is going to happen before George writes the ending.  I will be watching though because I'm an addict. I have a compulsive need to know.   How can one be addicted to such a thing as a book? 

 

I haven't made it through the comments yet but this post was just terrific - especially the last two lines.  Addiction to books?  Yes.  Addiction to knowledge? Yes.  Addiction to the mysteries and the imagination and the way the words dance across the page? To the discussions and the theories and the insights and the research?  Yes. Yes. Yes.

 

I was just thinking that if Martin's fans studied as diligently in college as they do his writing, a higher percentage would have Ph.D. after their names! 

 

Also, you are spot on with our building emotional barriers after some excruciatingly emotional reading.  We are cautious about getting too invested lest when more heartbreak (will) ensue. (Curse your inevitable "bad guys win and good guys either die or become bad guys" tropes!  *shakes fist* )

 

But, to the OP, I do agree to having a curiously strong interest in characters but tempered with an odd distancing.  I've wondered about this, feeling I should be more emotionally attached.  It could be that this world is so grim and filled with gut-wrenching atrocities that it engenders a sense of futility and hopelessness in the reader (me).  It could be that the effort to make everyone 'flawed' and to reflect 'realism' leaves almost no one for whom to cheer (the lesser of two evils is still evil, etc.)  Or it could be the numbers thing.  To paraphrase a quote, "one death is a tragedy; a thousand deaths is a statistic.  Bran's fall, Lady's death, and Ned's beheading were shattering to me.  Four books later, the inexorable march of death, destruction, horrible decisions, flawed 'heroes', and so forth have become numbing...leaving more than a few of us to question whether mankind on this world is worth saving by the time Martin dreams of spring. (I vote 'yes'!)

 

In the past, I have been more emotionally invested in characters from books by significantly less talented authors.  The true test will be if Martin can make me care passionately - to root unreservedly for his characters again...beyond just being fascinated while waiting for the dissatisfying character flaw to emerge, the utterly poor decision to be made, or the crushing futility to continue.  I want to care.  I want to hope.  I am fatigued by the agony of defeat (and suffering) - I need more joy of victory (especially victory of the human heart over the less-honorable qualities within.)

 

I'm a sucker.

 

ETA: interrupted before I could edit.  Sorry.  Didn't intend to get so verbose.

[Lateral]

I cried after Ned's beheading and when I thought that LSH killed Pod and on my reread of AGOT after almost every Bran chapter. so yeah, I'm very attached.

[Lost Melnibonean]

A good writer can make anyone get emotionally attached to their characters.  I got a lump in my throat when Bambi was wandering the woods calling for his mother after she was killed.  I am not emotionally immature nor mentally ill.  I am definitely not emotionally or intellectually invested in anything you have to say on the matter, however, you are entitled to your opinion.

When my wee ones ask for their mommy instead of me, I just love telling them, "You're mother can't be with you anymore."

[FacelessDude]

When reading ASOIAF I certainly do become attached and emotionally invested in certain characters, especially because of how the book is written (third-person narration). Certain major POV characters I am emotionally attached to more while other minor POV's and non-POV's not so much. It depends on how they are as a person and how they treat others.

 

But this is a fictional series of books. Of course ASOIAF mirrors our own world in many aspects but I limit the amount of emotion I put into fictional characters because I already live in a world where non-fictional people exist. They include family and friends and are more important and to me than characters in a book.

 

So in my mind I split these two universes apart. One is real, while the other is not real.

[JonCon's Red Beard]

I am, in a way, with a few of them. I suppose the emotional attachment happens when you see something of you in those characters (or viceversa). It's hard to simply not think that either they've been through something you've lived, or you're living/lived something they went through.

 

I barely paid attention to Connington until I fucked up bad in my own life and I ended up stranded from my work, friends and even family. This happened like one year and a half ago, he's been like this 15 years. The reason I wanted him to go to Westeros and "win" is because a part of me would also want to go and kick people's asses. I obviously won't go and invade people's work, houses and kill those who wronged me.

 

OR MAYBE I WILL.

[Philpenn]

Not attached to characters I like, just ones I dislike. Then I am truly happy when they get there's. Jon snicking Slynt's head off immediately comes to mind.

[~~~~~~~~~~~~~]

 

I haven't made it through the comments yet but this post was just terrific - especially the last two lines.  Addiction to books?  Yes.  Addiction to knowledge? Yes.  Addiction to the mysteries and the imagination and the way the words dance across the page? To the discussions and the theories and the insights and the research?  Yes. Yes. Yes.

 

I was just thinking that if Martin's fans studied as diligently in college as they do his writing, a higher percentage would have Ph.D. after their names! 

 

Also, I agree you are spot on with our building emotional barriers after some excruciating emotional reading.  We are cautious about getting too invested lest when more heartbreak (will) ensue. 

 

But, to the OP, I do agree to having a curiously strong interest in characters but tempered with an odd emotional detachment.  I've wondered about this, perhaps feeling I should be more emotionally attached.  It could be that this world is so grim and filled with gut-wrenching atrocities that it engenders a sense of futility and hopelessness in the reader.  It could be that the effort to make everyone 'flawed' and to reflect 'realism' leaves almost no one for whom to cheer (the lesser of two evils is still evil, etc.)  Or it could the the numbers thing.  To paraphrase a quote, "one death is a tragedy; a thousand deaths is a statistic.  Bran's fall, Lady's death, and Ned's beheading were horrific.  Four books later, the inexorable march of death, destruction, horrible decisions, flawed 'heroes', and so forth have become numbing...leaving more than a few to question whether mankind on this world is worth saving. 

 

I have been more emotionally invested in characters from significantly less talent authors.  The true test will be if Martin can make us care again - to trust again - to root unreservedly for his characters again...beyond just being interesting.

Thank you.  I love what you said about making us care again.  I'm so hoping not to be disappointed!