Jump to content

What gift would you give each character


King17

Recommended Posts

  1. Tyrion - 12 inches of extra height
  2. Jon Snow - Common Sense and Honor
  3. Daenerys - A dragon saddle and lessons on swordsmanship.
  4. Sansa - Common Sense
  5. Bran - Morals
  6. Cersei - Jaime's member
  7. Ramsay - Jon Snow for his amusement
  8. Arya - 30 days under Qyburn's care
  9. Drogon - A truckload of Hormel brand Spam and Corned Beef.
  10. Samwell - size DD mankini tanktop and a pair of speedo nut-huggers.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Egh... I guess dick in a box for Theon is a pretty obvious choice, but I've got to say it nonetheless

Eh... the Theon dick jokes just get old. Try reversing the gender roles and make a similar joke. I imagine most would say a joke about a woman's vagina who was mutilated getting a uterus in a box for Christmas would be taken by most as inappropriate.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'd give Brienne a crossbow and a quiver of arrows (also some lessons) she can  pick off Lady Stoneheart  and as many of the others as possible without them knowing where she was at.

Jaime's nicer without his hand but this is going to be a hell of a fight so I'd give that to him. (and a weapon)

Pod-weapon (he's going to stick them with the pointy end)

Hyle-ditto!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Egh... I guess dick in a box for Theon is a pretty obvious choice, but I've got to say it nonetheless

haha!

Eh... the Theon dick jokes just get old. Try reversing the gender roles and make a similar joke. I imagine most would say a joke about a woman's vagina who was mutilated getting a uterus in a box for Christmas would be taken by most as inappropriate.

Really? wouldn't it be a vulva in a box?

I'd give Jeyne Pool a maidenhead, haha.

Zing!!!!!!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Ned: Cunning
  • Cersei: A brain
  • Jaime: Humility
  • Littlefinger: A conscience
  • Bran: Wings
  • Sansa: Willas Tyrell
  • Arya: Nymeria
  • Cat: Her family
  • Stannis: Victory at Blackwater
  • Tywin: Joanna
  • Asha: The Ironborn
  • Theon: A coffin

 

 

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

This thread is deceptively dark, holy cow. 

I'm terrible at gifts, like I'm not kidding, just plain awful. I give people stuff I know they already have but my brain blocks the memory, or something I think I remember them saying they want but they actually hate, or just something crappy they return to the store the next day. 

So:

Tormund: a penis enlargement kit

Jaime: a right-hand glove

Myrcella: earrings

Bran: a bicycle

Cersei: shampoo

Victarion: a puzzle ages 3+

And so on

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I am not good at picking gifts...but here goes nothing.

Sansa:  a truck of lemon cakes and some happiness

Arya: the only person that gets her: Jon.

Brienne: more confidence and some mascara for her beautiful eyes.

Jamie: true love with a woman that is not his sister.

Cersei: a Rhaegar poster and a wig.

Coldhands: some fluffy gloves to warm up those hands

Melisandre: wood for her fires

Jon: a break from everything

Dany: a CD of How to train your dragon

Daario: hair dye

Tyrion: coal

Jorah: a Dany poster

Sandor: his sister

Penny: a hug

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  1. Tyrion - 12 inches of extra height
  2. Jon Snow - Common Sense and Honor
  3. Daenerys - A dragon saddle and lessons on swordsmanship.
  4. Sansa - Common Sense
  5. Bran - Morals
  6. Cersei - Jaime's member
  7. Ramsay - Jon Snow for his amusement
  8. Arya - 30 days under Qyburn's care
  9. Drogon - A truckload of Hormel brand Spam and Corned Beef.
  10. Samwell - size DD mankini tanktop and a pair of speedo nut-huggers.

why so much hate for arya?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Why all the existential bullshit? You can't buy someone common sense or a brain.

Just gonna do my three favorites.

Jaime gets a blade/buckler combo weapon to strap to his right arm and a weapon/shield of his choice for his left. I guess I could get him a nice 1000 dragon gift card for Tobho Mott's shop. Oh and a Valyrian Steel hand for outside of battle, so he can actually kill Freys when he backhands them for not shutting their stupid fucking mouths.

Aegon VI gets a Valyrian Steel crown identical to the Conqueror's and Valyrian Steel kneepads so he can, comfortably and stylishly, kiss his little brother, Jon Snow's, boots and hand the crown over when he gets beaten down by Jon's army. I like Aegon, but one land, one king. Maybe he can be Master of Coin or something.

Jon Snow gets a nice suit of gray and jet black armor with a dragon wing helm with a notch for his new re-gifted crown to fit into, and a gray/white wolf pelt for the trim. It would suit him quite well. Oh and I would also buy him stitches. A lot of them.

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I am not good at picking gifts...but here goes nothing.

Sansa:  a truck of lemon cakes and some happiness

Arya: the only person that gets her: Jon.

Brienne: more confidence and some mascara for her beautiful eyes.

Jamie: true love with a woman that is not his sister.

Cersei: a Rhaegar poster and a wig.

Coldhands: some fluffy gloves to warm up those hands

Melisandre: wood for her fires

Jon: a break from everything

Dany: a CD of How to train your dragon

Daario: hair dye

Tyrion: coal

Jorah: a Dany poster

Sandor: his sister

Penny: a hug

What do you mean by not good at picking gifts ? Those are really good ideas. :thumbsup:

The Sandor one is definetely my favourite suggestion so far. I am not even going to try topping it. You win !

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...