Which married couple is most in love?

[Tom Sevenstreams]

Many of the marriages in Westeros are awful arranged things where there doesn't seem to be much feeling between the two parties.  Jon and Lysa, Robert and Cersei, Tywin and Joanna.  I would not say many of the spouses are in love. 

Cat and Ned's marriage seemed to turn into something nice and they care for each other, but are they deeply in love?

Rhaegar and Lyanna is to be determined as we don't know the details.

Were Drogo and Dany in love?  They barely spoke the same language.  It seemed that a mutual respect was blooming, but maybe they knew each other for too short a time to say they were in love?

Renly and Loras were not married, but Loras seemed to love Renly deeply, not sure if it was mutual.

Oberyn and Ellaria?  They also weren't married, but that might be the strongest relationship I can think of.

[Sullen]

1 hour ago, Tom Sevenstreams said:

Many of the marriages in Westeros are awful arranged things where there doesn't seem to be much feeling between the two parties.  Jon and Lysa, Robert and Cersei, Tywin and Joanna.  I would not say many of the spouses are in love. 

Tywin and Joanna were genuinely in love though, as far as we know.

In fact, I'd say that Tywin-Joanna and Doran-Mellario are probably the two most loving marriages, despite their sour end.

[SeanF]

1 hour ago, Tom Sevenstreams said:

Many of the marriages in Westeros are awful arranged things where there doesn't seem to be much feeling between the two parties.  Jon and Lysa, Robert and Cersei, Tywin and Joanna.  I would not say many of the spouses are in love. 

Cat and Ned's marriage seemed to turn into something nice and they care for each other, but are they deeply in love?

Rhaegar and Lyanna is to be determined as we don't know the details.

Were Drogo and Dany in love?  They barely spoke the same language.  It seemed that a mutual respect was blooming, but maybe they knew each other for too short a time to say they were in love?

Renly and Loras were not married, but Loras seemed to love Renly deeply, not sure if it was mutual.

Oberyn and Ellaria?  They also weren't married, but that might be the strongest relationship I can think of.

Dany was very much in love with Drogo.  He seems to have been in love with her, although we only get her point of view.

[Queen Alienor]

Well, I'd definitively argue that Oberyn and Ellaria and Renly and Loras were very much in love. They never married, sure, but they stayed together for a longer time and were only separated by death.

Ned and Cat definitively developed a very loving relationship, even though they were strangers at their wedding.

Tywin and Joanna are said to have been very in love by multiple sources, so I assume they were. They were also first cousins, meaning that Tywin didn't gain anything by marrying Joanna (unless he picked up some inbreeding crazy from Aerys) which would imply that they married for love.

Doran Martell adn Mellario of Norvos married for love, but got the Westerosi equivalent of a divorce, so that's that.

Rhaegar and Lyanna is impossible to determinate at this point, though the adult crowin prince and a teenage girl is always going to be problematic.

Dany and Drogo... that's one of those super complicated things, really, because while she remembers him very fondly, she was also married to him (without any choice in the matter herself) at age thirteen, so... yeah. From a modern standpoint, that's rape of a minor and pedophilia on his part, no matter how pretty she is, and sorry, but I'm a modern person, so I have a lot of problems seeing it any differently.

Cersei and Robert despised each other, and Lysa despised Jon Arryn (not sure about his feelings on her). From most other couples we don't really know enough to tell.

[lightbringer2525]

Definitely Dany and Hizdahr! Just kidding.. I always thought that Cat and Ned genuinely loved each other. I don't know if they were head over heals, but they certainly loved each other. I also always believed that there was a genuine love between Joanna and Tywin. Part of why Tywin had so much contempt for Tyrion. The most genuine loves in the book were from people who weren't married such as Jon and Ygritte. They're my favorite love story in the books, but so heartbreaking.

[purple-eyes]

Tywin's situation seems suspicious. 

There is no doubt that he loved her. But she possibly loved aerys at some point in her early life. So we can not say Joanna loved him back. In grrm's world, most people only truly loved one person in whole life. 

Tywin maybe her second choice since she can not marry aerys. (Why did not aerys use polygamy though?) 

[purple-eyes]

Although Ned and cat had an good relationship, it looks like cat still had something in brandon and Ned still had something in ashara. 

So maybe they had an "amiable" relationship but not true love and passion. 

I still remembered when cat found Ned in the wood, Ned asked about children, cat thought, he always firstly talked about children. Something like that. Plus after their sex, Ned always immediately left and go to window. 

It sounds to me Ned only had dutiful love in cat, not passion. Cat did love him more though. 

[Jon Fossoway]

Davos and Marya Seaworth seem like a homely couple very much in love. They don't seem like the dramatic couples the sort of Rhaegar and Lyanna, but the persistency of Davos about returning home to his wife and taking care of his children tells a lot.

Also, Roose and Fat Walda looks like a weird couple that went well. The cold Roose admits he grew fond of his wife and she keeps sending him letters, although he burns them.

But, to me, Davos and Marya is the "normal" couple.

 

 

[Sullen]

1 minute ago, King Merrett I Frey said:

Davos and Marya Seaworth seem like a homely couple very much in love. They don't seem like the dramatic couples the sort of Rhaegar and Lyanna, but the persistency of Davos about returning home to his wife and taking care of his children tells a lot.

He apparently cheated on her several times though.

[Unbent_Unbroken]

 

9 minutes ago, purple-eyes said:

Tywin's situation seems suspicious. 

There is no doubt that he loved her. But she possibly loved aerys at some point in her early life. So we can not say Joanna loved him back. In grrm's world, most people only truly loved one person in whole life.

Tywin maybe her second choice since she can not marry aerys. (Why did not aerys use polygamy though?)

There's no real evidence to indicate this. Aerys certainly lusted after her but we have no way of knowing what Joanna's feelings for him were.

[Tijgy]

11 minutes ago, purple-eyes said:

Although Ned and cat had an good relationship, it looks like cat still had something in brandon and Ned still had something in ashara. 

So maybe they had an "amiable" relationship but not true love and passion. 

I still remembered when cat found Ned in the wood, Ned asked about children, cat thought, he always firstly talked about children. Something like that. Plus after their sex, Ned always immediately left and go to window. 

It sounds to me Ned only had dutiful love in cat, not passion. Cat did love him more though. 

I don't know... "Her loins still ached from the urgency of his lovemaking. It was a good ache. She could feel his seed within her."; "The thought of Cat was as painful as a bed of nettles. He wondered where she was, what she was doing. He wondered whether he would ever see her again." "The thought of Winterfell brought a wan smile to his face. He wanted to hear Bran's laughter once more, to go hawking with Robb, to watch Rickon at play. He wanted to drift off to a dreamless sleep in his own bed with his arms wrapped tight around his lady, Catelyn." ""He yearned for the comfort of Catelyn's arms, for the sounds of Robb and Jon crossing swords in the practice yard, for the cool days and cold nights of the north."

And they call each other My love. 

[Jon Fossoway]

4 minutes ago, Sullen said:

He apparently cheated on her several times though.

Considering how things fares in Westeros, I don't think that's a big catch though. Haha.

[thelittledragonthatcould]

32 minutes ago, purple-eyes said:

Tywin's situation seems suspicious. 

There is no doubt that he loved her. But she possibly loved aerys at some point in her early life. So we can not say Joanna loved him back. In grrm's world, most people only truly loved one person in whole life. 

Tywin maybe her second choice since she can not marry aerys. (Why did not aerys use polygamy though?) 

Not that there is  shred of evidence that Joanna loved Aerys, but are you really saying that you can only love one person in your whole life?  Seems an odd thing to say. It is possible that she loved the two of them at different times or maybe she loved the neither of them, but saying she loved Aerys once does not mean she can not have loved Tywin.

 

As it goes, I think the Tywin-Joanna love is overplayed thanks in part to a decent Tumblr writer (the irony). I think, like Ned and Cat, it was a political match with two people who completely accepted the rules their society lived in and made it work.

[purple-eyes]

33 minutes ago, Tijgy said:

I don't know... "Her loins still ached from the urgency of his lovemaking. It was a good ache. She could feel his seed within her."; "The thought of Cat was as painful as a bed of nettles. He wondered where she was, what she was doing. He wondered whether he would ever see her again." "The thought of Winterfell brought a wan smile to his face. He wanted to hear Bran's laughter once more, to go hawking with Robb, to watch Rickon at play. He wanted to drift off to a dreamless sleep in his own bed with his arms wrapped tight around his lady, Catelyn." ""He yearned for the comfort of Catelyn's arms, for the sounds of Robb and Jon crossing swords in the practice yard, for the cool days and cold nights of the north."

And they call each other My love. 

Yeah, I agreed they loved each other. But it is a dutiful love with a strong bond of children and family ties. Not something extremely passionate like Rhaegar and Lyanna. I Remember Cat said she learns to love her husband, something like that. So you do not need to "learn" to love somebody if you are in true and passionate love.

[Unbent_Unbroken]

4 minutes ago, purple-eyes said:

Yeah, I agreed they loved each other. But it is a dutiful love with a strong bond of children and family ties. Not something extremely passionate like Rhaegar and Lyanna. I Remember Cat said she learns to love her husband, something like that. So you do not need to "learn" to love somebody if you are in true and passionate love.

That's...a pretty naive view of love. Ned and Cat have a mature, grounded love And really, how do we know that Rhaegar and Lyanna was passionate true love? Until or unless we get a flashback that details what exactly happened between Rhaegar and Lyanna, we can't really label it either way.

[RobOsevens]

2 hours ago, SeanF said:

 

[RobOsevens]

58 minutes ago, Sullen said:

He apparently cheated on her several times though.

Its not cheating if you are in different kingdoms

[Ser Hyle]

24 minutes ago, Unbent_Unbroken said:

That's...a pretty naive view of love. Ned and Cat have a mature, grounded love And really, how do we know that Rhaegar and Lyanna was passionate true love? Until or unless we get a flashback that details what exactly happened between Rhaegar and Lyanna, we can't really label it either way.

Don't underestimate the power of preconceived notions. 

[dariopatke]

Ned/Cat and Tywin/Joanna.

[purple-eyes]

2 hours ago, Unbent_Unbroken said:

That's...a pretty naive view of love. Ned and Cat have a mature, grounded love And really, how do we know that Rhaegar and Lyanna was passionate true love? Until or unless we get a flashback that details what exactly happened between Rhaegar and Lyanna, we can't really label it either way.

Rhaegar abandoned everything (wife, children, throne, kingdom) for lyanna and in the end died for lyanna and lyanna held his gift at death and did not tell anything to his family about her eloping and hiding for one year. I bet their love is quite overwhelming. 

Not like Ned and Cat. One married for the army of tully and one married due to the death of the betroth.