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Dating: “I have this disease late at night sometimes, involving alcohol and the telephone.”


Datepalm

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26 minutes ago, Arch-MaesterPhilip said:

I've got to find a reader. 

I have y'all to talk books with, so it's not necessary.  I definitely need someone who can entertain themselves while I am reading.  Fanboy worries me a little.  I think he's REALLY young.  Hasn't been an issue yet, so I'm not going to borrow trouble.  

Mayday reappeared from where ever she went.  Shit, when it rains it pours.  

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47 minutes ago, Lily Valley said:

I have y'all to talk books with, so it's not necessary.  I definitely need someone who can entertain themselves while I am reading.  Fanboy worries me a little.  I think he's REALLY young.  Hasn't been an issue yet, so I'm not going to borrow trouble.  

Mayday reappeared from where ever she went.  Shit, when it rains it pours.  

Jeezy Petes,  your cup runneth over. I was wondering what ever happened to her. 

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1 hour ago, Arch-MaesterPhilip said:

Jeezy Petes,  your cup runneth over. I was wondering what ever happened to her. 

I get the impression that I was the back burner girl for all of the above.  Whatever other irons were in the fire didn't pan out.  That's fine with me.  Second fiddle is a lot less pressure than first chair.  

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Just now, Lily Valley said:

I get the impression that I was the back burner girl for all of the above.  Whatever other irons were in the fire didn't pan out.  That's fine with me.  Second fiddle is a lot less pressure than first chair.  

 If you're not looking to be tied down it certainly has it's advantages. 

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On 6 September 2016 at 7:10 PM, Liffguard said:

Thanks for the kind words.

I've also decided that binge-watching Parks & Rec is a healthy coping mechanism.

Parks & Rec is a good way to brighten your mood a bit. Sorry about the break up :( 

Question for the board now. What's the thoughts on starting up a relationship after a break? I went out with someone when I first started uni, was going great, but then things went South with my mental health so I told him I didn't think I could do the whole dating thing. He was fine with that, we've stayed friends, chat often, but recently things have been flirty again and it seems like he might want to pick things back up. Thoughts on this?

Of course I could just be misreading the signals in which case meh, never mind.

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11 hours ago, Lily Valley said:

I am so sorry.  Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell is out on Netflix. :(  Hang in there.

I had two dates this weekend.  One with a pal who isn't too bright and another with the SevenEves fanboy.   Fanboy read the Three Body Problem and is plowing through The Dark Forest.  Will definitely see again.

Wait- they made Jonathan strange? Was it good?

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11 hours ago, HelenaExMachina said:

Parks & Rec is a good way to brighten your mood a bit. Sorry about the break up :( 

Question for the board now. What's the thoughts on starting up a relationship after a break? I went out with someone when I first started uni, was going great, but then things went South with my mental health so I told him I didn't think I could do the whole dating thing. He was fine with that, we've stayed friends, chat often, but recently things have been flirty again and it seems like he might want to pick things back up. Thoughts on this?

Of course I could just be misreading the signals in which case meh, never mind.

I'm in quite a similar spot. I stopped dating my ex-coworker because we were both in the wrong place, as with both of us starting at new jobs and all that we were too stressed out to manage a relationship or anything resembling one. Still, we reestablished contact last week and hit it right off once again. We'll see where that goes.

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11 hours ago, HelenaExMachina said:

Question for the board now. What's the thoughts on starting up a relationship after a break? I went out with someone when I first started uni, was going great, but then things went South with my mental health so I told him I didn't think I could do the whole dating thing. He was fine with that, we've stayed friends, chat often, but recently things have been flirty again and it seems like he might want to pick things back up. Thoughts on this?

Of course I could just be misreading the signals in which case meh, never mind.

Why not? Just figure out how you feel about it and go from there. Good luck. :)

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11 hours ago, HelenaExMachina said:

Parks & Rec is a good way to brighten your mood a bit. Sorry about the break up :( 

Question for the board now. What's the thoughts on starting up a relationship after a break? I went out with someone when I first started uni, was going great, but then things went South with my mental health so I told him I didn't think I could do the whole dating thing. He was fine with that, we've stayed friends, chat often, but recently things have been flirty again and it seems like he might want to pick things back up. Thoughts on this?

Of course I could just be misreading the signals in which case meh, never mind.

Depends on the reasons for the break. Usually people don't change and if there are fundamental issues with a relationship then they don't go away and you'll just repeat them all over again. If the problems were due to circumstances and they change then I don't see a problem. 

The issue can be with if there was a bunch of stuff that happened inbetween, say you both dated and shagged a bunch of other people, that can be a weird thing to get your head around.

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A guy walks up to me at a bus stop, asks the time, then asks for my number. He's swinging from the chandelier high and smells of vodka from three feet away, but in a really cheerful way. I brush him off and tell him i'm only in town for a few weeks, etc. 

"We can still have sex! Very fast sex!"

I burst out laughing. "That's not how you get a girls number."

He really thinks about it. "Very slow sex?"

"Not improving."

"Medium?"

Then he segued into a long cricket metaphor I probably couldn't have followed even if we was sober. I gave him my name for facebook, figuring if he managed to remember my unconventionally spelled last name later he might as well get the credit. 

Then he got on a bicycle and wobbled away into Indian traffic, so I'm pretty sure I sent the man to his death.

(Sixty seconds after that, another guy pulls up and tries to get me to get on his scooter - he'll give me a ride home. He was just obnoxious without being funny though.) 

Indian dudes and Datepalm, interactions, summary statistics, Sep 2016: still godawful, with pronounced negative trend.  

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5 hours ago, Arkhangel said:

Quick, hive-mind! asked someone on OKC why he moved here, said it was because of a girl and then they broke up. Non-awkward way to respond to this?

"I'm sorry to hear that, that's a bummer."  Ask another question.  (If you want to be really advanced, ask what he likes to do in the area or something along those lines.  It might be able to tease out if he has moved on or not.  You probably wouldn't get enough information, but, you never know.)

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9 hours ago, Kelli Fury said:

Wait- they made Jonathan strange? Was it good?

BBC production.  It's good, but it lacks those spectacular footnotes.  The sets are incredible.  

17 hours ago, HelenaExMachina said:

Parks & Rec is a good way to brighten your mood a bit. Sorry about the break up :( 

Question for the board now. What's the thoughts on starting up a relationship after a break? I went out with someone when I first started uni, was going great, but then things went South with my mental health so I told him I didn't think I could do the whole dating thing. He was fine with that, we've stayed friends, chat often, but recently things have been flirty again and it seems like he might want to pick things back up. Thoughts on this?

Of course I could just be misreading the signals in which case meh, never mind.

I've gotten busy and disappeared on people before.  Run into them years later and it's fine.  I think dating that fizzles out because of timing is different than a relationship and a breakup.  If he's flirting, he's flirting.  Ask him out.

9 hours ago, Kelli Fury said:

Why is this quote function being so silly?  Wait, do I get to be Kelli today?  AWESOME.

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A practical question for the board hive mind. I still have some stuff of hers at my place, including a set of spare keys. I can't really face dropping stuff off at hers in person right now. I don't want to send keys in the mail (since by definition they'll have an address attached and could in theory be used to break in) and the other stuff is a bit bulky to send by post anyway. And I don't really know anyone in this town who could drop it off for me. Thoughts on how to get this stuff back to her? Just suck it the fuck up and drive it over in person?

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11 minutes ago, Liffguard said:

A practical question for the board hive mind. I still have some stuff of hers at my place, including a set of spare keys. I can't really face dropping stuff off at hers in person right now. I don't want to send keys in the mail (since by definition they'll have an address attached and could in theory be used to break in) and the other stuff is a bit bulky to send by post anyway. And I don't really know anyone in this town who could drop it off for me. Thoughts on how to get this stuff back to her? Just suck it the fuck up and drive it over in person?

Yes, maybe have a friend or someone come with you.  If you really need too, have that friend run it up.

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11 minutes ago, Liffguard said:

 Thoughts on how to get this stuff back to her? Just suck it the fuck up and drive it over in person?

I'd probably just bite the bullet and do it. People can get weird about their stuff post break up and the longer you leave it the more potential there is for making an issue out of it.

4 hours ago, Datepalm said:

Then he segued into a long cricket metaphor I probably couldn't have followed even if we was sober. I gave him my name for facebook, figuring if he managed to remember my unconventionally spelled last name later he might as well get the credit.

It's probably doesn't say good things about my priorities that after reading this story my first thought was 'I wonder what the cricket metaphor was?'

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. Thoughts on how to get this stuff back to her? Just suck it the fuck up and drive it over in person?

You could be like my previous room-mate's ex, who left all her stuff at our doorstep in a fairly large box - I then walked right into said box and spilled it's contents on our landing ( keys, photos, a stuffed bear, a box of spices (?!?!)) 

1 hour ago, ljkeane said:

It's probably doesn't say good things about my priorities that after reading this story my first thought was 'I wonder what the cricket metaphor was?'

Same! 
And admiration for said man that he thought it might be good idea to drive a bicycle in India. 

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