Harrenys Targaryen Posted June 13, 2016 Share Posted June 13, 2016 So my supervisor and I were having a jokey repartee after clocking out for the shift - he grins and excuses himself from the building. The coworker emerges from the breakroom, I greet him, he flicks me off, accuses me of agitating supervisor and in so doing "making it harder for him [coworker] to work under his [supervisor's] watch", threatens to kick my you-know-what outside of work, and hocks up spittle at my forehead and glasses. Five witnesses/coworkers who overheard (and perhaps saw) the above were all ESL speakers, one Spanish and four Karen (Thai/Burmese minority), though not the supervisor himself, to whom I promptly reported the situation: he says that he will bring me a form to fill out concerning this matter. In the meantime, I wonder if shucking out some dough towards the nearest forensics clinic might be the better course of action in gathering evidence to use against the offender? (Gotta keep the glasses unwashed until then in that case, eh?) P.S. My HR department has currently put me on hold even as I prepare to tell them what I told him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DireWolfSpirit Posted June 13, 2016 Share Posted June 13, 2016 I dont know Monica Lewinki's attorney, but here is the phone number for Barry Scheck- (212)-965-9081 http://www.nsbcivilrights.com/lawyers/barry-scheck/ I'm sure he would leap at the chance to represent you in this compelling legal drama. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MisterOJ Posted June 13, 2016 Share Posted June 13, 2016 6 minutes ago, DireWolfSpirit said: I dont know Monica Lewinki's attorney, but here is the phone number for Barry Scheck- (212)-965-9081 http://www.nsbcivilrights.com/lawyers/barry-scheck/ I'm sure he would leap at the chance to represent you in this compelling legal drama. You win the day. Well done. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IheartIheartTesla Posted June 13, 2016 Share Posted June 13, 2016 How are you going to get a comparative DNA sample from him that is admissible in the court of HR? "Look, I have this spit sample on my glasses and this hair I plucked from him and the two of them match!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harrenys Targaryen Posted June 14, 2016 Author Share Posted June 14, 2016 21 hours ago, DireWolfSpirit said: I dont know Monica Lewinki's attorney, but here is the phone number for Barry Scheck- (212)-965-9081 http://www.nsbcivilrights.com/lawyers/barry-scheck/ I'm sure he would leap at the chance to represent you in this compelling legal drama. Heh, we'd have to secure the rights before getting to that stage! 21 hours ago, MisterSrna said: You win the day. Well done. Who was the runner-up? 21 hours ago, IheartIheartTesla said: How are you going to get a comparative DNA sample from him that is admissible in the court of HR? "Look, I have this spit sample on my glasses and this hair I plucked from him and the two of them match!" I was thinking about the fact that he and I both had our fingerprints taken upon hire... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
baxus Posted June 14, 2016 Share Posted June 14, 2016 2 hours ago, Harrenys Targaryen said: I was thinking about the fact that he and I both had our fingerprints taken upon hire... Unless I'm very much mistaken, fingerprints don't contain DNA. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. Chatywin et al. Posted June 14, 2016 Share Posted June 14, 2016 1 hour ago, baxusz said: Unless I'm very much mistaken, fingerprints don't contain DNA. You haven't gotten that upgrade yet? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr. Pepper Posted June 14, 2016 Share Posted June 14, 2016 Fingerprints that don't deposit testable strands of DNA are sooooo old skool. They're like the myspace of fingerprints. GET WITH THE TIMES!!!! On a serious note, OP, I think the only time DNA* would come into it would be if the police were investigating it as a crime. Spitting on someone is considered assault so you'd definitely have grounds to file a complaint with your local police department. At the very least, someone who is assaulting other employees should be fired. One would hope your HR took that step, especially considering there were plenty of witnesses. *and ffs no, there won't be testable DNA in your employee fingerprint file. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Anti-Targ Posted June 15, 2016 Share Posted June 15, 2016 Yeah, keep the eyeglasses unwashed and if you don't get satisfaction from HR then lay an assault claim with the police, in which the eyeglasses become the key bit of forensic evidence to prove that that guy's saliva is on your glasses. And then if the guy is successfully prosecuted you can sue your employer for failing to take appropriate action in response to a workplace assault (if you are ready to leave that company, and possibly find it hard to get work without moving to a new town). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
baxus Posted June 15, 2016 Share Posted June 15, 2016 12 hours ago, Tywin et al. said: You haven't gotten that upgrade yet? No, our health insurance wouldn't cover it and I'm not sure that upgrade's worth paying the extra money. But now you mention it, I may look into it a bit better. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lord of Rhinos Posted June 15, 2016 Share Posted June 15, 2016 DNA testing typically takes 6 months. Even if you got a match it would be a long time before authorities were sure of it. In a case like this it is very dubious whether the police would be willing to take the time and money to perform a DNA test. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arkhangel Posted June 15, 2016 Share Posted June 15, 2016 Crazy idea here, but maybe it would be easier just to ask the witnesses? ESL =/= blind or incapable of telling people what they saw, even if they end up needing to use a translator. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sologdin Posted June 15, 2016 Share Posted June 15, 2016 why bear the expense of a DNA test for a misdemeanor battery case? are there any damages for a civil claim aside from dignitary affront? is not the market remedy more efficient? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tears of Lys Posted June 15, 2016 Share Posted June 15, 2016 I'm more interested in your past interactions with this charming fellow. Seems that you two probably have a history of nastiness for it to have escalated to said discharge of fluid upon his hearing a "joke" at which your supervisor and you were laughing. Is the guy generally weird in other ways? I don't mean to be an alarmist, but I can see the possibility of such animosity escalating to actual violence. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NestorMakhnosLovechild Posted June 15, 2016 Share Posted June 15, 2016 Getting a testable DNA sample should be pretty easy, if you're really dedicated to doing it. You might try following the guy into the bathroom and seeing if you can capture a fecal sample. You might be able to find some cells from the inner lining of the rectum or, better yet, some blood if they have a particularly difficult stool. Alternatively, you can attempt to surreptitiously pleasure them to climax and then catch a DNA sample in a petri dish or, if they are small enough, a test tube. If you're not willing to consider these alternatives, I really have to question your fidelity to this story. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BloodRider Posted June 16, 2016 Share Posted June 16, 2016 15 hours ago, Tears of Lys said: I'm more interested in your past interactions with this charming fellow. Seems that you two probably have a history of nastiness for it to have escalated to said discharge of fluid upon his hearing a "joke" at which your supervisor and you were laughing. Is the guy generally weird in other ways? I don't mean to be an alarmist, but I can see the possibility of such animosity escalating to actual violence. Call me cynical, but I wonder if this whole account is not apocryphal, and written for the lulz. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tongue Stuck to Wall Posted June 16, 2016 Share Posted June 16, 2016 Why the fuck would you solicit advice about a legal matter in the General Chat section of an online forum dedicated to a fantasy literature series? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tears of Lys Posted June 16, 2016 Share Posted June 16, 2016 8 hours ago, BloodRider said: Call me cynical, but I wonder if this whole account is not apocryphal, and written for the lulz. I did wonder about this too, but I figured it was more amusing to take it seriously. 8 hours ago, Tongue Stuck to Wall said: Why the fuck would you solicit advice about a legal matter in the General Chat section of an online forum dedicated to a fantasy literature series? Some posters look at things as they are and ask why. Some, OTOH, ask why not. (to paraphrase.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr. Pepper Posted June 16, 2016 Share Posted June 16, 2016 I'm a bit annoyed there hasn't been an update. Especially about those upgraded DNA fingerprints. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nas! Posted June 17, 2016 Share Posted June 17, 2016 On June 16, 2016 at 6:27 AM, Tongue Stuck to Wall said: Why the fuck would you solicit advice about a legal matter in the General Chat section of an online forum dedicated to a fantasy literature series? We are well known here on the internets for the quality and sincerity of our advice. No case too small. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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