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so nobody in Westors actually has any friends ?


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Something while watching, it may just be that in those times there was no time to " hang out "  but nobody especially high born has any real friends, they have wifes and acquaintances. The only real friendship i can think of is between Jon and Sam, who i could see most likely going for a beer if they both survive the war but even then they are friends for only the time they are fighting/working together.... " work collegues " is more fitting.

But every other connection is in some way profiting for one or both parties, even in Lord of the rings we see before they set off that Frodo,Sam,Marry and Pippin were actual friends and socialized down the pub.

Is there any true friendships in the show ? Ned and Robb stands out as one but again once the war was over they parted ways and never saw each other for what was it 7,8,9 years ?

Also the distance between places and lack of transport like we have would make a long distance friendship hard so it's understandable not seeing each other when living apart in this case.

Bronn and Tyrion form a friendship of sorts but it becomes apparent that money was keeping that friendship together, yes they like each other more than most but it isn't a true friendship as its supply and demand.

It could be an adult thing when you get older you settle have a family and you see less of and shed friends.

But even the kids on the show have no interactions with any other kids... maybe it's just the high born ones that are lonely and normal folk go about socialising more as they don't have as much on their plates.

Any true friendships that i may have missed outside of using each other for a purpose or just a random acquaintance ?

the friendship between the four in lord of the rings was real as Frodo was tasked with the mission alone but his friends wouldnt let him do it on his own, and joined him with no promise of gold or getting anything out of it.

 

 

 

 

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Is it House Tully whose words are "Family. Duty. Honor"? In a way, I think that is just the way of life in that world for everyone.

I don't want to be rude by asking this (I won't be offended if you decide not to answer), bit how old are you? The reason I ask her s because when I was growing up I thought I would always have the friends I had back then. Now that I'm almost 34, I have learned (and yes, it can be heartbreaking) that as one grows older their interests change, things happen that are beyond one's control, responsibility and the menial tasks of life come into play. For me, personally, I realized that some who I thought were friends were just merely acquaintances.

Anyway. Before I start rambling, time just has a way of either pulling people apart or deepening a friendship. If one is lucky and works hard at it, he may get the latter. I also think that God brings people into and out of your life for a variety of reasons and periods of time.

But for the sake of the show, I think time/budgwt constraints have the biggest part to play in the lack of friendships.

Somehow I feel like I just said a bunch of stuff and may or may not have answered your question. LOL

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35 minutes ago, Travis said:

Is it House Tully whose words are "Family. Duty. Honor"? In a way, I think that is just the way of life in that world for everyone.

I don't want to be rude by asking this (I won't be offended if you decide not to answer), bit how old are you? The reason I ask her s because when I was growing up I thought I would always have the friends I had back then. Now that I'm almost 34, I have learned (and yes, it can be heartbreaking) that as one grows older their interests change, things happen that are beyond one's control, responsibility and the menial tasks of life come into play. For me, personally, I realized that some who I thought were friends were just merely acquaintances.

Anyway. Before I start rambling, time just has a way of either pulling people apart or deepening a friendship. If one is lucky and works hard at it, he may get the latter. I also think that God brings people into and out of your life for a variety of reasons and periods of time.

But for the sake of the show, I think time/budgwt constraints have the biggest part to play in the lack of friendships.

Somehow I feel like I just said a bunch of stuff and may or may not have answered your question. LOL

Hey no I totally agree once people get to a certain age that they shed friends or that their time is taken up by work, family, spouse and meeting up with friends becomes rarer.

The adult characters i can make sense of a bit but even the younger characters seem to have no real friendships, a perfect example of real life vs life in westeros, Is when Ned has to take his family south not one of the children groan and moan about leaving their friends behind, because they probably spend all their time with brothers and sisters or with the maester or septa,

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Those early scenes in season one of Bran and Winterfell's maester kind of show that education, at least among the noble families, is of most important in childhood. Then they must learn battle skills (for boys, anyway), and other skills that will benefit them and their House. In other words, childhood is spent preparing to be a grownup. That used to be the case in our world, too, but that seems to be slipping away. Nowadays, children are taught how to prolong childhood indefinitely.

Oh. I almost forgot about Jenne Poole (spelling?), Sansa's childhood friend.

I would have liked the show (at least the books) to explore childhood friends who grow up to be on different sides of a war. Kind of like the American Civil War. How many had to fight old friends, family members and/or other loved ones? Wow. That is mind boggling.

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There's been a few friendships having been molded over the TV series lifespan (Tyrion and Bronn for example is one of the most notable ones, they even give the two screentime to confirm their actual friendship in the episode Blackwater. As well as Jon and Sam as you mentioned) I think so much has been happening that most of the characters haven't had a chance to form friendly bonds with others, or many have formed bonds with people over the course of the show through the traumas they have endured and you may not have noticed since most of them don't just shout outn "So and so is my friend" or "blank, you are my friend". 

 

Arya, Gendry and Hotpie.

Jaime and Brienne (I think it is safe to say that these two like one another, if not romantic then I definitely consider them to be friends, if not friends then they still respect and think very highly of each other. Brienne has seen the real humble Jaime and that is all she sees when she talks to him).

Meera and Bran.

Even Brienne and Pod seem to be forming a bond of sorts in their time together. 

Hell Tyrion and Varys have grown closer since Varys essentially helped Tyrion escape KL and join Daenerys. Plus in the TV show Tyrion and Jaime ended on decent terms and even though Jaime said back in S5 that he'd split Tyrion in two if he saw him again. I'm pretty certain he was just putting up a front and even Bronn looked like he doubted Jaime's threat towards Tyrion, or was confused by it to some extent.

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What i mean by this is in Lord of the Rings, Sam, Frodo, Merry and Pippin were friends long before Frodo had his quest given to him, and so they accompanied him not for gold or gain, but because they loved him as a friend and wanted to help him on his quest and protect him. This is true to life we have friends true friends that when you need them will be there for you.

In Game of thrones there is no one of the sort before the shit hits the fan... When Jon decided to leave for the nights watch, where is his best friend in Winterfell " you aint going up that cold place alone Jon... i'll be joining you.", he is a 15/16 year old boy, surely he made some real friends growing up in Winterfell that would be sad to see him go and want to join him on his journey ?

When Ned decides to take Bran Sansa and Arya south to KL, there was no moans " awww dad what about my friends " ....

The only mention in the show of anyone having a childhood friend was Ned having Rob... 

It seems your bestfriend in Westeros, is a family member and everyone else can be a best friend if the price is right/or share a common goal to use each other.

 

 

 

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11 hours ago, Adam_Up_Bxtch said:

There's been a few friendships having been molded over the TV series lifespan (Tyrion and Bronn for example is one of the most notable ones, they even give the two screentime to confirm their actual friendship in the episode Blackwater. As well as Jon and Sam as you mentioned) I think so much has been happening that most of the characters haven't had a chance to form friendly bonds with others, or many have formed bonds with people over the course of the show through the traumas they have endured and you may not have noticed since most of them don't just shout outn "So and so is my friend" or "blank, you are my friend". 

 

Arya, Gendry and Hotpie.

Jaime and Brienne (I think it is safe to say that these two like one another, if not romantic then I definitely consider them to be friends, if not friends then they still respect and think very highly of each other. Brienne has seen the real humble Jaime and that is all she sees when she talks to him).

Meera and Bran.

Even Brienne and Pod seem to be forming a bond of sorts in their time together. 

Hell Tyrion and Varys have grown closer since Varys essentially helped Tyrion escape KL and join Daenerys. Plus in the TV show Tyrion and Jaime ended on decent terms and even though Jaime said back in S5 that he'd split Tyrion in two if he saw him again. I'm pretty certain he was just putting up a front and even Bronn looked like he doubted Jaime's threat towards Tyrion, or was confused by it to some extent.

In addition to these, I would add the following

Jaime and Bronn.  They seem to like each other and get along.

Catelyn and Baelish.  If I remember from book 1, these two were friends until Baelish decided he was in love with her, ala Snape and Lily Potter.

Jon and Robb.  I am counting this as not family, because Jon was a bastard and they were treated as outsiders, yet Jon and Robb had a close friendship.

Jon and Sam.

Jon and Tormund.

Ned and Howland Reed.

I do think there are friendships in the show and book. Perhaps I do not fully understand what the OP means...?

 

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There are many people who have friends in this show I think you are just mistaking what people in power are like with normal people. It's no different than current American culture.

When I was poor and in college I had a lot of friends. I would go to parties like every weekend and people would always come to my apartment to hang out. Then I became a successful Engineer at the age of 25 who is working on a PhD and married a girl who finished med school at 26. And guess what, the only time I see friends now is when they want something from me or if it's some type of coordinated church event.

That's the thing about success, when you obtain it then you have to start worrying about others rather then yourself. These rulers are no different Jon for example prior to the Nights watch he was more concerned about silly things like his image. Then once in power he is now concerned about the survival of those around him. There is no going to speak to his cool uncle who is a cool warrior! Jon is now the person that everyone is looking to for guidance.

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10 hours ago, StoneColdJorahMormont said:

What i mean by this is in Lord of the Rings, Sam, Frodo, Merry and Pippin were friends long before Frodo had his quest given to him, and so they accompanied him not for gold or gain, but because they loved him as a friend and wanted to help him on his quest and protect him. This is true to life we have friends true friends that when you need them will be there for you.

In Game of thrones there is no one of the sort before the shit hits the fan... When Jon decided to leave for the nights watch, where is his best friend in Winterfell " you aint going up that cold place alone Jon... i'll be joining you.", he is a 15/16 year old boy, surely he made some real friends growing up in Winterfell that would be sad to see him go and want to join him on his journey ?

When Ned decides to take Bran Sansa and Arya south to KL, there was no moans " awww dad what about my friends " ....

The only mention in the show of anyone having a childhood friend was Ned having Rob... 

It seems your bestfriend in Westeros, is a family member and everyone else can be a best friend if the price is right/or share a common goal to use each other.

 

 

 

Well many noble children in feudal societies spend their childhood preparing to be lords, etc so don't have as much time for these things. Sansa did have Jeyne Poole (who is in the show for a scene if even that i don't even remember and is mentioned once by Sansa, where as in the books Jeyne Poole is being used by the Boltons as a fake Arya to try and garner the support of the northern lords against Stannis). Arya had Micah the butcher's boy who was killed by the Hound in the first season. Arya has since mentioned Micah a few times later on in the series (most notably during The Hounds trial by the Brotherhood), so I'd assume they were close when she was living in WF as she calls him "her friend". Robb and Jon grew up with a friendly sibling rivalry and became very close because they were around the same age. Plus they were still brothers in each other's eyes. Jon even mentions in the show that he wanted to hate Robb but never could. Theon and Robb grew up together as well and became very close because of it. Granted that friendship is severed later on when Theon betrays Robb but that is another example of a friendship in this world. I could keep going...

 

but the point is, they may not put much emphasis on friendships in this show, but that's simply because so much other important stuff is going on. We'll still get scenes every once in a while showing how close certain characters have come. That's just not this show's main focus....

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8 hours ago, House_Tony_Stark said:

There are many people who have friends in this show I think you are just mistaking what people in power are like with normal people. It's no different than current American culture.

When I was poor and in college I had a lot of friends. I would go to parties like every weekend and people would always come to my apartment to hang out. Then I became a successful Engineer at the age of 25 who is working on a PhD and married a girl who finished med school at 26. And guess what, the only time I see friends now is when they want something from me or if it's some type of coordinated church event.

That's the thing about success, when you obtain it then you have to start worrying about others rather then yourself. These rulers are no different Jon for example prior to the Nights watch he was more concerned about silly things like his image. Then once in power he is now concerned about the survival of those around him. There is no going to speak to his cool uncle who is a cool warrior! Jon is now the person that everyone is looking to for guidance.

But jon never had any friends before he came into power.... where was his friend/friends when he was leaving for the nights watch to say i'm coming with you... friends stick together the way merry and pippen followed Sam and Frodo. I do agree the nobles would have had less friendships than the commoners.. ala richie rich. But no one in the show has shown to have had any friendships before they all set off on their own quests.

The closest thing mention on the show to being a friendship was Ned and Rob but even that is questionable... as after they won the war they never had contact for nearly 9 years... and you guessed it only were reuinited when one of them needed something from the other ( rob wanting ned for the hands role).

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4 minutes ago, Adam_Up_Bxtch said:

Well many noble children in feudal societies spend their childhood preparing to be lords, etc so don't have as much time for these things. Sansa did have Jeyne Poole (who is in the show for a scene if even that i don't even remember and is mentioned once by Sansa, where as in the books Jeyne Poole is being used by the Boltons as a fake Arya to try and garner the support of the northern lords against Stannis). Arya had Micah the butcher's boy who was killed by the Hound in the first season. Arya has since mentioned Micah a few times later on in the series (most notably during The Hounds trial by the Brotherhood), so I'd assume they were close when she was living in WF as she calls him "her friend". Robb and Jon grew up with a friendly sibling rivalry and became very close because they were around the same age. Plus they were still brothers in each other's eyes. Jon even mentions in the show that he wanted to hate Robb but never could. Theon and Robb grew up together as well and became very close because of it. Granted that friendship is severed later on when Theon betrays Robb but that is another example of a friendship in this world. I could keep going...

 

but the point is, they may not put much emphasis on friendships in this show, but that's simply because so much other important stuff is going on. We'll still get scenes every once in a while showing how close certain characters have come. That's just not this show's main focus....

I don't recall this jayne pool in the show but if she was then yes thats what i was looking for a friend made before the show begins that is a friend not looking for something or some sort of gain out of it.

Arya met micah when she arrived at kings landing, and was someone she needed to spar with... he didn't even want to do it, but what butchers boy is gonna refuse a lady... can he be considered an actual friend? maybe she considered him one as she has never had a real one before in her life..

Robb and Jon are brothers..

Robb and Theon was a forced situation, and once the latter got the chance to run away from he did so again can you consider this a friendship...

I agree there are some friends forged on the way after the show starts... but they are passing friendships either by coin or work related ( nights watch )

Where are the friends prior to the first episode ?

Where is Jons Bucky to his Captain America who wants to join the army to fight with his friend when he is called upon ?(nightswatch)

Where is Jamies sam to his frodo when he has to go on the rescue mission to dorne ? instead of having to turn to someone with coin to accompany him ? (bronn)

It seems no one in the show if they were at there lowest point ( no money.home etc.. ) has anyone to turn to in need.... unless they had something to offer the person in return.

Does tyrion really have no one except his brother that he could ask to fight for his life ? except people looking for money or land off of him.

Where is Gendrys mate who when he hears he is being sold off by the blacksmith comes looking for him ?

you could really go on and on with people in certain situations in the show when they are need having no real friends to help them out... and having to turn to strangers or acquaintances with gold or land for help

 

 

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7 minutes ago, StoneColdJorahMormont said:

I don't recall this jayne pool in the show but if she was then yes thats what i was looking for a friend made before the show begins that is a friend not looking for something or some sort of gain out of it.

Arya met micah when she arrived at kings landing, and was someone she needed to spar with... he didn't even want to do it, but what butchers boy is gonna refuse a lady... can he be considered an actual friend? maybe she considered him one as she has never had a real one before in her life..

Robb and Jon are brothers..

Robb and Theon was a forced situation, and once the latter got the chance to run away from he did so again can you consider this a friendship...

I agree there are some friends forged on the way after the show starts... but they are passing friendships either by coin or work related ( nights watch )

Where are the friends prior to the first episode ?

Where is Jons Bucky to his Captain America who wants to join the army to fight with his friend when he is called upon ?(nightswatch)

Where is Jamies sam to his frodo when he has to go on the rescue mission to dorne ? instead of having to turn to someone with coin to accompany him ? (bronn)

It seems no one in the show if they were at there lowest point ( no money.home etc.. ) has anyone to turn to in need.... unless they had something to offer the person in return.

Does tyrion really have no one except his brother that he could ask to fight for his life ? except people looking for money or land off of him.

Where is Gendrys mate who when he hears he is being sold off by the blacksmith comes looking for him ?

you could really go on and on with people in certain situations in the show when they are need having no real friends to help them out... and having to turn to strangers or acquaintances with gold or land for help

 

 

The part featuring Arya with Mycah is before they arrive in KL. Its along the Kingsroad in the Riverlands near the trident which is near the crossroads inn. Arya met Mycah up in the north on their way down towards moat Caitlin so they were traveling together for a while before everything goes down.

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1 minute ago, Adam_Up_Bxtch said:

The part featuring Arya with Micah is before they arrive in KL. Its along the Kingsroad in the Riverlands I believe at the crossroad inn.

Really, I just thought it was Kings Landing because Sansa and Joffrey find them while out walking and the attack takes place ? or do you mean they met on the way to Kings Landing ? even then it was still a Butchers boy sparring with a noble because she wanted too even though he didn't.

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This is an interesting question. A lot of the main characters are in situations that would make it difficult for childhood friends to renin a part of their life. Dany, for instance, moved around a lot with no one but her brother for company. But Ned and Robert are a good example of what you're looking for; relatively equal social standing, trained as squires in a place strange to both of them, and thus Robert cares for Ned more than his own brothers. They are forced to live apart as adults because of their responsibilities, but probably would be hanging out a lot more if they could live closer. 

The comparative lack of childhood friends might be a point in and of itself; the sad nature of the unequal society of Westeros and Essos. Jaime in the books mentions having guys like Ser Addam Marbrand (a Ser-not-appearing-in-this-show) as friends. But as the heir apparent to Casterly Rock, his friends would have ultimately been his subordinates. And then he joins the Kingsguard at 15. And then, a counterpoint to Ned and Robert is Tywin and Aerys (explored more in the books and especially the World of Ice and Fire). They were friends as boys but grew into enemies over time. 

Speaking of the Kingsguard, Rhaegar and Arthur Dayne were apparently close buds. I can't recall if they had squired together or if they met as adults. 

Cersei, in the books at least, had at least two female friends as a girl- Melara and another Jeyne, I believe? I don't think Cersei is good at keeping friends. :( 

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1 hour ago, Liver and Onions said:

This is an interesting question. A lot of the main characters are in situations that would make it difficult for childhood friends to renin a part of their life. Dany, for instance, moved around a lot with no one but her brother for company. But Ned and Robert are a good example of what you're looking for; relatively equal social standing, trained as squires in a place strange to both of them, and thus Robert cares for Ned more than his own brothers. They are forced to live apart as adults because of their responsibilities, but probably would be hanging out a lot more if they could live closer. 

The comparative lack of childhood friends might be a point in and of itself; the sad nature of the unequal society of Westeros and Essos. Jaime in the books mentions having guys like Ser Addam Marbrand (a Ser-not-appearing-in-this-show) as friends. But as the heir apparent to Casterly Rock, his friends would have ultimately been his subordinates. And then he joins the Kingsguard at 15. And then, a counterpoint to Ned and Robert is Tywin and Aerys (explored more in the books and especially the World of Ice and Fire). They were friends as boys but grew into enemies over time. 

Speaking of the Kingsguard, Rhaegar and Arthur Dayne were apparently close buds. I can't recall if they had squired together or if they met as adults. 

Cersei, in the books at least, had at least two female friends as a girl- Melara and another Jeyne, I believe? I don't think Cersei is good at keeping friends. :( 

I'm not discounting these as friends fully but Ned and Robert is a good example but there is some things that sways me into thinking it wasn't a genuine friendship but one born out of a workplace and aslong as they continued to work together they continued to be friends.

I have friends that i am friends with regardless of where i work or where i live, they are the guys i go out with every weekend and meet up to do pool nights, football nights... they are my true friends... that even if i was broke living in gutter, they would still be there for me and i would still be there for them.

Then there is the friends you meet in work... that you remain friends for aslong as you both work together but when one leaves, send the occasional message but sooner or later drift apart.

Rob and Ned met squiring so knew they would be spending a lot of time together, and whether they got on naturally or had to work at it... it had to at least be civil as with any workplace. So they remained together fought a war together, but the moment work was done they went their separate ways and if i remember had no contact in person for 9 years ? this is typical of a work based friendship... real friends still make time for each other. Then of course they reunite but not for a hang out or a catch-up but for business. so reuniting to work together ( work friends )

Sam and Jon is almost identical so far to Ned and Robs story, only time will tell if they remain in closer contact after the watch has ended.

Jaime subordinates or work friends on the kings guard.

Cersei probably had maidens or people who were friends through fear or necessity.

Again it's nitpicking as when people grow older they go there seperate ways and location and commitments make it hard to keep up a relationship but just like a partner a real friendship can be worked on and if it is real they will make time once a month to travel and get a night together etc.....

In this show you have people who are friends through position, work related or in passing but no character has someone they can call upon for a favour or to do something without needing to pay them or offer them a castle lol.

Tyrion had his brother and bronn the latter only willing to fight for him for gold.

Jaime had his brother or bronn to take on the trip to dorne the latter only willing to go for gold.

The Adult thing is understandable but the amount of kids on the show prior to shit hitting the fans not having any friends their own age is a bit odd even for someone noble. Brans best friend is the maester and sansa spends her spare time with the septa.

 

 

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