Jon's Queen Consort Posted December 23, 2016 Share Posted December 23, 2016 Santa Claus is coming and he is bringing gifts all around the word. If you were the Santa in GRRTH what presents you would get to the characters in ASOIAF and the rest of the books? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
velo-knight Posted December 23, 2016 Share Posted December 23, 2016 A copy of The Winds of Winter. Edit: hit post too soon. Meant to add, a family reunion would probably be a huge gift for most :'( Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fattest Leech Posted December 24, 2016 Share Posted December 24, 2016 Arya, a white fawn Christmas ornament Bran, and map to the escape hatch and a tauntaun... he is gonna need it! Sansa, Ice to take care of Littlefinger. Rickon, a boat. Jon, band-aids and a can of whoop-ass to unleash on Marsh, Yarwyck and the other muntineers who had been plotting against him since before he was LC. Dany, a paternity test since there is a constant question of who her genes come from. Big Walder, a new pair of gloves... couldn't resist! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Clegane'sPup Posted December 24, 2016 Share Posted December 24, 2016 24 minutes ago, The Fattest Leech said: Arya, a white fawn Christmas ornament Bran, and map to the escape hatch and a tauntaun... he is gonna need it! Sansa, Ice to take care of Littlefinger. Rickon, a boat. Jon, band-aids and a can of whoop-ass to unleash on Marsh, Yarwyck and the other muntineers who had been plotting against him since before he was LC. Dany, a paternity test since there is a constant question of who her genes come from. Big Walder, a new pair of gloves... couldn't resist! great post. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Weirwoods Eyes Posted December 24, 2016 Share Posted December 24, 2016 Brilliant @The Fattest Leech Erm; Cersei a bottle of Hippocras. Cos if she's drunk enough maybe she'll just pass out. Tyrion a Rough Guide to "Where Whores Go" Sansa a puppy Arya a scabbard cos I doubt Needle still has it's original one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scootaloo Stark Posted December 24, 2016 Share Posted December 24, 2016 Sam gets some nice fantasy books. Sansa and Littlefinger get daggers. Arya already has my heart, so I guess she can have the rest of me as well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MaybeINeverSawACamel Posted December 24, 2016 Share Posted December 24, 2016 Sansa gets a puppy. Rob gets his skull back. Bran gets a mech suit. Rickon gets disciplined. Arya gets a ticket to Westeros. Jon gets Rob's Will and a date with Val. Caitlyn gets "the gift" Ned's bones get to his tomb in WF. Varys gets a pair of those testicles that idiots hang on the back of their pick up trucks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John Doe Posted December 26, 2016 Share Posted December 26, 2016 Sansa: A dog. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Marquis de Leech Posted December 26, 2016 Share Posted December 26, 2016 I'd be an Evil Santa. Bran Stark: a bicycle Jon Snow: a white three-piece suit Arya Stark: knitting patterns Hodor: The Complete Works of Shakespeare Tywin Lannister: a clown suit Cersei Lannister: a dress several sizes too small Tyrion Lannister: Gregor Clegane's armour Stannis Baratheon: a comb. Littlefinger: a jigsaw puzzle with one piece missing. Varys: a packet of condoms. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kissdbyfire Posted December 26, 2016 Share Posted December 26, 2016 10 minutes ago, Roose Boltons Pet Leech said: I'd be an Evil Santa. Bran Stark: a bicycle Jon Snow: a white three-piece suit Arya Stark: knitting patterns Hodor: The Complete Works of Shakespeare Tywin Lannister: a clown suit Cersei Lannister: a dress several sizes too small Tyrion Lannister: Gregor Clegane's armour Stannis Baratheon: a comb. Littlefinger: a jigsaw puzzle with one piece missing. Varys: a packet of condoms. Love it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batbob45 Posted December 26, 2016 Share Posted December 26, 2016 Shireen-ability to control the elements with her mind(all the element, even able to conjure rain out of thin air). Stannis- dentist for his teeth. Renly-a book on how to be a better brother and uncle Shitmouth- a better boss(like Hot Pie) and 2 kegs of mead Jayne Poole-being in the care by Varys before LF got to her. Arya-Joffrey dropping dead during the hand's tournament( it would make Tommen the heir, Sandor would be his Sworn Sword(Sandor did praise Tommen courage for getting back on his horse), and Ned would still be alive). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Greywater-Watch Posted December 26, 2016 Share Posted December 26, 2016 14 hours ago, Roose Boltons Pet Leech said: I'd be an Evil Santa. Bran Stark: a bicycle Jon Snow: a white three-piece suit Arya Stark: knitting patterns Hodor: The Complete Works of Shakespeare Tywin Lannister: a clown suit Cersei Lannister: a dress several sizes too small Tyrion Lannister: Gregor Clegane's armour Stannis Baratheon: a comb. Littlefinger: a jigsaw puzzle with one piece missing. Varys: a packet of condoms. Sunglasses for Euron! Locusts for Strong Belwas! A piggybank for Penny! A corked bottle of wine with a corkscrew (for right-handers) for Jaime! An Ice Cream for Ser Ilyn Payne! Self-inflammable toilet paper for Victarion! A walking frame for Barriston Selmy! Pregnancy test sticks for Daenerys. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sigella Posted December 26, 2016 Share Posted December 26, 2016 On 24 december 2016 at 0:31 AM, Jon's Queen Consort said: Santa Claus is coming and he is bringing gifts all around the word. If you were the Santa in GRRTH what presents you would get to the characters in ASOIAF and the rest of the books? Jon: a book about of the nature of bastards Tyrion: a book about STD's Arya: Cersei Varys: CkOne-perfume Aegon: dna test result of his parentage Littlefinger: a big ass longsword Sweetrobin: a babybottle Sansa: a miniature of the Hound that barks and plays "who let the dogs out" every time you open it Arianne: a chastity belt Samwell: a chastity belt Gilly: a chastity belt Dany: a chastity belt Jon: the key to Danys belt Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joy Hill Posted December 26, 2016 Share Posted December 26, 2016 Brienne : reconstructive surgery for her cheek Myrcella : reconstructive surgery Lady Stoneheart : Petyr Baelish Sam : some workout music Sweetrobin : a wet nurse Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rotting sea cow Posted December 26, 2016 Share Posted December 26, 2016 You forgot this one Walder Frey: A very big meat pie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
John Doe Posted December 26, 2016 Share Posted December 26, 2016 Loras: A candle Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Isobel Harper Posted December 27, 2016 Share Posted December 27, 2016 Ned Stark: A copy of AGoT so he can prevent himself from dying in said book. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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