Manhole Eunuchsbane

MLB 2017: Jim Rice Tells CC Sabathia to Mix in a Salad

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Headed to SD today to catch game two of the day/night doubleheader. 

Also, I have a suggestion for The Eck Files: Kirk Gibson should have a recurring role. Like maybe he's a local player and Eck has to go to him from time to time to get information. They don't like each other, but sometimes Eck has to swallow his pride to get the info he needs. 

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4 hours ago, Myshkin said:

Headed to SD today to catch game two of the day/night doubleheader. 

Also, I have a suggestion for The Eck Files: Kirk Gibson should have a recurring role. Like maybe he's a local player and Eck has to go to him from time to time to get information. They don't like each other, but sometimes Eck has to swallow his pride to get the info he needs. 

YES. I had the same thought, only I had him cast as like the #1 PI in town. Like Eck gets his castoffs and has to hear about how wonderful he is. He's always seeing his commercials on TV or is seeing him interviewed on the news after solving a big case, etc. I like your version as well. 

Edited by Manhole Eunuchsbane

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Guys, is the Rangers FO shitty? And I mean lacking in humanity? Things are kind of life and death in Houston so baseball shouldn't even matter but the fact the Rangers wouldn't trade home series with the Astros just seems incredibly cynical and shitty. Very shitty.

They are 14 games back of the Astros and would need more than a series later this month to boost their chances to contend. They're competing for revenue at this point and would no doubt lose out on $$$ having a last minute series played out in Arlington now. But they would have had a chance for great optics and maybe an opportunity for charitable donations that would have brought people out to the park. 

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So while it sucked we lost last night, going to Petco Park was still a lot of fun. It really is a beautiful park, and no joke, at least 70% of the people there were Dodger fans. It felt like a home game. That's gotta be embarrassing for the Padres. The one downside was $30 parking. 

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10 minutes ago, Myshkin said:

So while it sucked we lost last night, going to Petco Park was still a lot of fun. It really is a beautiful park, and no joke, at least 70% of the people there were Dodger fans. It felt like a home game. That's gotta be embarrassing for the Padres. The one downside was $30 parking. 

That is a nice park. Had a similar experience at a Giant's game a couple of seasons back. I wouldn't go so far as to say 70% were Giants fans at the game I attended, but I'd say 50/50 is probably fair.

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Severino is the first AL pitcher 23 or under with 200 strikeouts in a season since King Felix in 2009.  Yanks are now 4-1 against Sale, who has a 4.58 ERA in 41.1 innings since August 1 (based on my back-of-the-napkin math).  Judge hits a 469 foot HR, and Holliday hits his second HR in as many games upon returning.  Good day and series for the Yanks.  They're still destined for the Wild Card at best though unless the bats can consistently wake up.

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:agree:

Castro needs to start raking like he was before he went on the DL.

Sale hasn't beaten the Yanks yet this season.

This upcoming road trip needs to be .500+ baseball if we got a shot to challenge the Sawks, but their homestand is against terrible teams.

 

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Lucas Giolito striked out 10 players in 7 innings yesterday. He's 2-0 with a 0.64 ERA and 14 strikeouts in his last two starts. He's the first White Sox player since Chris Sale to have double digit strikeouts within his first three career starts.

I love how bright the future of the White Sox looks.

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Hey folks, I think we've moved beyond baseball talk at this point. This thread really should be solely dedicated to the development of The Eck Files. Now we all know that every good P.I. needs at least one sidekick, so who should Eck's sidekick(s) be? Just looking at the A's '88 roster provides some good options: Jose Canseco, Mark McGwire, Walt Weiss, and Dave Stewart, just to name a few. Going back to his Sawks days, Eck also played with this thread's namesake, Jim Rice, as well as the incomparable Wade Boggs. Also, I think he should have a foil, a Higgins to his Magnum. I suggest a constantly shithoused Tony LaRussa.

ETA: I'm warming up to the idea of Canseco being one of the sidekicks. A giant bruiser of a man, who has a carefree, almost happy-go-lucky attitude. His bright outlook helps keep Eck from sliding back into depression, but he's also ready to smash heads when the need arises. Eck likes to needle him about his former Bash Brother, McGwire, because that's the one thing Canseco doesn't want to talk about. 

Edited by Myshkin

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4 hours ago, Myshkin said:

Hey folks, I think we've moved beyond baseball talk at this point. This thread really should be solely dedicated to the development of The Eck Files. Now we all know that every good P.I. needs at least one sidekick, so who should Eck's sidekick(s) be? Just looking at the A's '88 roster provides some good options: Jose Canseco, Mark McGwire, Walt Weiss, and Dave Stewart, just to name a few. Going back to his Sawks days, Eck also played with this thread's namesake, Jim Rice, as well as the incomparable Wade Boggs. Also, I think he should have a foil, a Higgins to his Magnum. I suggest a constantly shithoused Tony LaRussa.

ETA: I'm warming up to the idea of Canseco being one of the sidekicks. A giant bruiser of a man, who has a carefree, almost happy-go-lucky attitude. His bright outlook helps keep Eck from sliding back into depression, but he's also ready to smash heads when the need arises. Eck likes to needle him about his former Bash Brother, McGwire, because that's the one thing Canseco doesn't want to talk about. 

Love the shithoused LaRussa as Higgins angle. Book it. Done. If we're using Magnum as our primary progenitor (and why not) we could indulge in two buddies. 

Going back to the snitch/informer role you had Kirk Gibson cast in earlier, if I may I'd like to suggest like a crusty old bench/pitching coach in that role. I don't think their careers intersected much, but I'd like to forward Don Zimmer for this part.

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Oh yeah, and just a couple of flourishes here. I feel like we have to bring that CHiPs thing back, where all the main players are hanging out after breaking the case. Someone cracks a joke, and they all crack up, then it goes to freeze frame and the credits roll.

 And Eck needs some sort of exotic pet, like a weasel or an alpaca or a kimodo dragon or some shit. 

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So we got Zimmer as the Ice Pick type character, and Gibby as the rival P.I. Then there's Canseco as one of the sidekicks, and I'm leaning toward Stewart as the other. LaRussa as the drunken foil. Maybe he's local PD. And of course Eck's pet is a Komodo dragon, possibly named Heater or Slider, or something to that effect. Setting needs to be someplace warm, so Eck can wear shorts. Hawaii and San Diego are no goes because we don't want to cleave too closely to Magnum or Simon & Simon, so I suggest Florida. This is really starting to come together.

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I would watch the living fuck out of this show.

 

Oh yeah, one more suggestion. Eck lives in a outdated, gone to seed sort of apartment/condo complex. The Property Manager is an over-the-hill bombshell, say Morgana the Kissing Bandit or Tawny Kitaen or the like. Eck is always behind on the rent, and there is this recurring subtext where the bombshell corners him and suggests that he could cover the rent through some lascivious means. Eck then has further motivation to solve the case and get paid. 

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Welp, Dodgers are slumping at the wrong time while the Diamondbacks and Indians are peaking at the right time.

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On 2017-09-02 at 5:33 PM, Myshkin said:

Headed to SD today to catch game two of the day/night doubleheader. 

Also, I have a suggestion for The Eck Files: Kirk Gibson should have a recurring role. Like maybe he's a local player and Eck has to go to him from time to time to get information. They don't like each other, but sometimes Eck has to swallow his pride to get the info he needs. 

Not joking, Kirk Gibson is a total scumbag in real life.

Edited by James Arryn

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On ‎9‎/‎4‎/‎2017 at 0:41 AM, dmc515 said:

Severino is the first AL pitcher 23 or under with 200 strikeouts in a season since King Felix in 2009.  Yanks are now 4-1 against Sale, who has a 4.58 ERA in 41.1 innings since August 1 (based on my back-of-the-napkin math).  Judge hits a 469 foot HR, and Holliday hits his second HR in as many games upon returning.  Good day and series for the Yanks.  They're still destined for the Wild Card at best though unless the bats can consistently wake up.

Castro has been producing, Didi has been consistent all year, Headley has found his swing, Sanchez has been good, really the only missing piece to the puzzle is Judge but he looks like he's going to come around pretty soon.

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The Eck Files just needs a showrunner now. Gold.

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Just spit-balling some minor characters to round out the cast of The Eck Files. I was thinking he should have some colorful neighbors. Like say a Mark "The Bird" Fidrych or a Dock Ellis? Kind of a zen Deadhead/burnout who always has some really pertinent and sage advice for the Eck, just when he needs it most.

 Seeing how this is set in Miami, we seem to be a little short on the T&A, so I'm going to go with a set of young, hot, ditzy blonde twins who live across the hall. Think like a 2017 version of Audrey and Judy Landers. They could always be dropping hints for the Eck that they're down to turn his frown upside down, but plot complications always provide a last second cock block. 

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3 hours ago, Arch-MaesterPhilip said:

Castro has been producing, Didi has been consistent all year, Headley has found his swing, Sanchez has been good, really the only missing piece to the puzzle is Judge but he looks like he's going to come around pretty soon.

Right, Castro has looking great since returning, but it's only been 10 games.  If they can get all you mentioned going at the same time - along with Bird and at least one of Gardner (who's sucked lately), Ells (who's been great lately, Hicks or Frazier (both need to get back), that's quite a formidable lineup.

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