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NFL 2017: Sneaky-Good October


Jace, Extat

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I think it's kind of funny that a lot of fans in Washington are grumbling about letting the Niners back in it on Sunday, and that we looked pretty unimpressive at home against an 0-5 team.  I feel like those fans should take a look around the league, because Atlanta, Denver and Kansas City were all big favorites at home, and they all lost.  Hell, Denver wasn't even competitive against the 0-5 Giants. 

Sometimes you get some weird breaks, like the Niners fumble recovery touchdown (Davis was definitely down, just didn't have a good view on replay so the call stood), or a 3rd round rookie playing a very different style than Brian Hoyer, and thus changing the whole scouting report.  Whatever, we got the win, lets move on.

I am very concerned about the injuries going into a HUGE game @ Philly this week.  First round pick Allen has been a beast in his first five games, but he's out for a month with a foot injury.  Norman and Breeland are both maybes.  Really the whole secondary is just hanging on.  For most of the Niners game we had only two safeties able to go.  Not ideal.

On offense, our tight ends are so bad at blocking, it is frankly kind of astounding.  Like our O line is crushing it, and we still can't run the ball AT ALL because the tight ends are getting destroyed.  I think the solution is just to never put Reed or Davis in to block, because they're not getting it done.  We need more running plays where our tight ends are split out wide so they can't screw everything up. 

Other than that, the two biggest games of the season are coming up, with games @Philly and vs Dallas.  If we lose to Philly, we'll be 3-3, while they're at 6-1 with the tiebreaker, so winning the division is almost out the window.  Then Dallas is always a big game, and there's a good chance we're both going to be fighting for a wild card. 

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When are we going to discuss that the Falcons may be in trouble?  

Look, they don't suck and now that Green Bay is done (sorry - those State Farm commercials were great ... except for that overrated shlub, Clay Matthews), Atlanta may still be the favorites in the NFC, but they are just ... not right.  Is it safe to say they are not over the Superbowl? 

Again, they are not terrible by any means - 7th ranked offense and ... 24th ranked defense?  (by DVOA).  But hey- at least their D is not as stone-cold terrible as the Pats.  Anyway, Atlanta was 3-0, with wins over a feisty Lions team and the Packers.  And scored a whopping 77 points in those 3 games.  So, great right?  Well... for starters they also gave up 66 points so their +/- was only +11.  The Falcons then proceeded to lose back to back home games to the Bills (no real shame there; Bills may be good) and the Dolphins ... and that IS a real shame.  In both games Atlanta lead at the half (this ... this sounds familiar) and then proceeded to give up huge leads (oh boy ...) before collapsing at the end (good news: no Lady Gaga sightings so its not EXACTLY the same as the Superbowl).  And lost to an AFC East team (too much?).  

In those two games Atlanta was outscored in the second half a whopping 38-7 (not QUITE 28-3 ... okay, I'll stop).  

Now, all that bad enough.  None of that is ANY good.  Got it.  

But then curiously ... Dan Quinn said something kinda strange during his press conference after the inexplicable loss to Jay Cutler (all losses top Jay Cutler are entirely inexplicable).  Quinn said “You can’t replay the game that was played in the Super Bowl, but what we can do is control what we have now." 

I'm not sure what the question was but ... holy shit Atlanta.. you seem like you are not quite over it (I can't see how you would be, mind you.  I know 3 guys whose hangovers are just now clearing up from that win).  But I think the Pats are in Atlanta's head and Atlanta is not handling it well.  At all.  I mean look at Julio Jones: no TDs and no red-zone targets (just like the Superbowl).  Ryan is DEAD LAST in passer rating on passes traveling over 20 yards in the air.  

Here's the good news: The Pats D is so horrible, it made the Jets look competitive.  The Pats are DEAD LAST in Def DVOA; Pats are dead last in yards given up per game (the distance between then and the #31st team [Colts] is 30 yards per game is the same as the distance between the #31 team and the #24th team [Jets]); 29th in opposing QB rating; 29th in points allowed per game; 29th in total plays from scrimmage allowed; 27th in defensive penalties; 25th in 3rd down conversions; EVERY QB has passed for over 300 yards when playing the Pats and its not exactly a Hall of fame class they have faced.  Sure, Drew Brees hanging 3 bills on you is not unusual but they have also given up 300 yards to Alex Smith (welcome back to Earth), Cam Newton (yards per game is around 240); Deshaun Watson  average yards per game: 216); Jameis Wonston (has looked terrible since) and something called a "Josh McCown" (averages around 229 yards a game).  The Pats have given up an ASTOUNDING 324 yards passing per game.  There is only one other team - Tampa Bay - that has given up over 300 (301).  

I think we will know how real Atlanta's demons are this week.  IF they beat the Pats I think that will go a long way to their overall health as a team.  

The Pats, meanwhile, could defeat Sauron, I think they are still screwed.   

 

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21 hours ago, Pony Queen Jace said:

You kidding me? I'm sitting on a pole.

I thought you just spun around on them. Anyways. it looks like your beloved caveman might go on IR:

http://www.espn.com/nfl/story/_/id/21068176/andrew-luck-indianapolis-colts-shut-due-soreness-shoulder

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3 hours ago, Tywin et al. said:

I thought you just spun around on them. Anyways. it looks like your beloved caveman might go on IR:

http://www.espn.com/nfl/story/_/id/21068176/andrew-luck-indianapolis-colts-shut-due-soreness-shoulder

I always said he shouldn't play, but Ballard has remained adamant that he won't go on IR so that he can keep practicing when he feels good.

As far as poles go, I'll point out that I won the bet. Elliot's suspension has been stayed again.

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12 hours ago, Pony Queen Jace said:

I always said he shouldn't play, but Ballard has remained adamant that he won't go on IR so that he can keep practicing when he feels good.

As far as poles go, I'll point out that I won the bet. Elliot's suspension has been stayed again.

Agreed. Any responsible team would sit him for the season. There’s no point in risking his future, especially after you just signed him to a huge deal, in a season where you won’t win the Owl. Their best bet is to tank and trade the top pick for a lot of assets.

Also, no, you have not won the bet yet. Zeke can still be suspended. He can tear his ACL today. He can miss the game because he’s on a drug fueled binge. He can be a healthy scratch. Zeke must play at least one down for you to win, though you likely will at this point.

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5 hours ago, Tywin et al. said:

Agreed. Any responsible team would sit him for the season. There’s no point in risking his future, especially after you just signed him to a huge deal, in a season where you won’t win the Owl. Their best bet is to tank and trade the top pick for a lot of assets.

Also, no, you have not won the bet yet. Zeke can still be suspended. He can tear his ACL today. He can miss the game because he’s on a drug fueled binge. He can be a healthy scratch. Zeke must play at least one down for you to win, though you likely will at this point.

Ty. Ty, baby! You know my powers are great. It's easy, buddy. Just accept that I am your goddess.

Although, I am going to need you to kneel...

I know, I know, but it's not for me. All of your friends need to know that your capitulation is sincere.

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Who the fuck outta you works for the NFL network? I make a backup QB rankings on Monday and on Thursday there's a backup qb rankings on the official nfl website with the dudes in the same fucking order.

It's not that I'm mad, I'm kinda turned on.

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2 hours ago, Pony Queen Jace said:

Ty. Ty, baby! You know my powers are great. It's easy, buddy. Just accept that I am your goddess.

Although, I am going to need you to kneel...

I know, I know, but it's not for me. All of your friends need to know that your capitulation is sincere.

Sorry darlin’, but I don’t break that easily. I can be quite hard to get.

2 hours ago, Pony Queen Jace said:

Who the fuck outta you works for the NFL network? I make a backup QB rankings on Monday and on Thursday there's a backup qb rankings on the official nfl website with the dudes in the same fucking order.

It's not that I'm mad, I'm kinda turned on.

@Maithanet really called it.

Alternative fact, you just know your eggball. 

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7 minutes ago, Tywin et al. said:

Sorry darlin’, but I don’t break that easily. I can be quite hard to get.

@Maithanet really called it.

Alternative fact, you just know your eggball. 

O'Ren Ishi-I once told me that I needed to work on my prognosticating.

Let's just say that was the last time she did business with Badass Bitch Sidekick INC. and three weeks later she's getting her head chopped off by a little white girl who wants to play with samurai swords. Meanwhile, I've contracted out to Ridley Scott and am trying to salvage a tentpole summer film as Orlando Bloom's stunt double. Chryst, I ended up doing the entire thing. They just put a fake goatee on me and had Brendon Gleeson coked out of his mind trying to take my goddamn head off.

I swear, if it hadn't been for Eric Bana's afterparties I wouldn't have made it.

You ever slain Brad Pitt's ankle and then downed sixteen shots of Skull Vodka while hotboxing the set of Agammemnon's palace like the cure for sobriety was at the bottom of my shotglass? We shot half that shit in the studio, so eventually we all ended up strewn across Bana's lawn.

Then rinse and repeat.

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8 minutes ago, Pony Queen Jace said:

This game is pretty good so far.

Nantz gave the kiss of death for the Raiders D on that series with the dreaded "There's only been one 99 yard TD drive this season, and it was by the Raiders." 3 plays later, there's now 2.

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7 minutes ago, Joe Pesci said:

Nantz gave the kiss of death for the Raiders D on that series with the dreaded "There's only been one 99 yard TD drive this season, and it was by the Raiders." 3 plays later, there's now 2.

This game has everything!

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1 minute ago, Pony Queen Jace said:

Can anyone else just imagine the Raiders getting destroyed from here on and Marshawn Lynch retires again?

That's the first thing I thought of after watching him run out on the field and get tossed actually.

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