What's the funniest interaction between characters in the books to you

[Varysblackfyre321]

For me its when Jamie is meeting up with Lancel in AFFC and Jamie gets confirmation that Cersi did cheat on him while he was a captive with Lancel. Lancel completely fesses up to having slept with the queen but tries to defend himself having of having  not committed treason by virtue of having not well finished inside the queen. I found that absolutely hysterical. What about you?

[Clegane'sPup]

Back in the first book Clegane says as Tyrion is standing beside the Hounds horse ---

"A voice from nowhere," Sandor said. He peered through his helm, looking this way and that. "Spirits of the air!"

[Apoplexy]

7 minutes ago, Varysblackfyre321 said:

For me its when Jamie is meeting up with Lancel in AFFC and Jamie gets confirmation that Cersi did cheat on him while he was a captive with Lancel. Lancel completely fesses up to having slept with the queen but tries to defend himself having of having  not committed treason by virtue of having not well finished inside the queen. I found that absolutely hysterical. What about you?

There are so many! But the Jaime-Lancel interaction reminds me of the Jaime-Blackfish interaction. 'Do you know what honor is' 'A horse' made me laugh!

[Naive Reader]

Renly at Arya's "trial". This made me laugh and I began to really like Renly (and therefore get upset when he is later assassinated by "cheating").

Quote

As Arya began her story, Ned heard the door open behind him. He glanced back and saw Vayon Poole enter with Sansa. They stood quietly at the back of the hall as Arya spoke. When she got to the part where she threw Joffrey's sword into the middle of the Trident, Renly Baratheon began to laugh. The king bristled. "Ser Barristan, escort my brother from the hall before he chokes."
Lord Renly stifled his laughter. "My brother is too kind. I can find the door myself." He bowed to Joffrey. "Perchance later you'll tell me how a nine-year-old girl the size of a wet rat managed to disarm you with a broom handle and throw your sword in the river." As the door swung shut behind him, Ned heard him say, "Lion's Tooth," and guffaw once more.

 

[Ponzi Scheme]

1. Lord Walder Frey and Catelyn Stark's meeting. 
2. Any scene with Lord Walder is hilarious.
3. Daenerys and the Titan's bastard meeting (just read this on Dany's Power Moves section).
4. Ilyrio Mopatis and Tyrion first meeting.
5. Xaro trying to talk Daenerys from entering the house of the undying with Jorah listening in disapproval.

[Foot_Of_The_King]

-Lord Walder and Cat first meeting

-Tyrion speaking to his father's war consul about the ferocity of the clansman

-Stannis with everyone 

Those are the ones off the top of my head.

 

[Kandrax]

Petyr and Lysa's wedding night.

[One-eyed Misbehavin]

5 hours ago, Foot_Of_The_King said:

-Lord Walder and Cat first meeting

-Tyrion speaking to his father's war consul about the ferocity of the clansman

-Stannis with everyone 

Those are the ones off the top of my head.

 

I like all 3 of these. Tyrion on the war council was such a great scene.

Ill add Tyrion "dueling" Alliser Thorne and poking him with steel (a crab fork) lol 

[Leo of House Cartel]

This one always cracked me up. Jeor was a great guy. 

First Ranger!" The Old Bear's eyes lighted on Sam. "I'd sooner name you First Ranger. He has the effrontery to tell me to my face that I'm too old to ride with him. Do I look old to you, boy?" The hair that had retreated from Mormont's spotted scalp had regrouped beneath his chin in a shaggy grey beard that covered much of his chest. He thumped it hard. "Do I look frail?"

Sam opened his mouth, gave a little squeak. The Old Bear terrified him. "No, my lord," Jon offered quickly. "You look strong as a . . . a . . ."

"Don't cozen me, Snow!, you know I won't have it. Let me have a look at these maps." Mormont pawed through them brusquely, giving each no more than a glance and a grunt. "Was this all you could find?"

 

"I . . . m-m-my lord," Sam stammered, "there . . . there were more, b-b-but . . . the dis-disorder . . ."

 

ACOK - Jon I

[zandru]

A lot of the Arya & the Hound scenes are good. Also, pretty much anything with Dolorous Edd Tollett.

[Ferocious Veldt Roarer]

Whenever Janos Slynt, full of himself, gets put in his place. By Tyrion. By Stannis. Ultimately, by Lord Snow. And every time completely deserved.
 

Quote

 

Six gold cloaks moved quietly into the Small Hall behind him as Janos Slynt backed away.

"Lord Slynt," Tyrion called out, "I believe you know Ser Jacelyn Bywater, our new Commander of the City Watch."

Quote

 

"Who better to command the black cloaks than a man who once commanded the gold, sire?"

"Any of you, I would think. Even the cook."

 

Quote

“Then you had best be on your way, boy.” Slynt laughed, dribbling porridge down his chest. “Greyguard’s a good place for the likes of you, I’m thinking. Well away from decent godly folk. The mark of the beast is on you, bastard.”

“You are refusing to obey my order?”

“You can stick your order up your bastard’s arse,” said Slynt, his jowls quivering.

(...) “As you will.” Jon nodded to Iron Emmett. “Please take Lord Janos to the Wall (...) and hang him,” Jon finished.

 

 

[LiveFirstDieLater]

 

Quote

"A burning sword," corrected Davos.

"Burnt," said Salladhor Saan, "and be glad of that, my friend. Do you know the tale of the forging of Lightbringer? I shall tell it to you. It was a time when darkness lay heavy on the world. To oppose it, the hero must have a hero's blade, oh, like none that had ever been. And so for thirty days and thirty nights Azor Ahai labored sleepless in the temple, forging a blade in the sacred fires. Heat and hammer and fold, heat and hammer and fold, oh, yes, until the sword was done. Yet when he plunged it into water to temper the steel it burst asunder. 

"Being a hero, it was not for him to shrug and go in search of excellent grapes such as these, so again he began. The second time it took him fifty days and fifty nights, and this sword seemed even finer than the first. Azor Ahai captured a lion, to temper the blade by plunging it through the beast's red heart, but once more the steel shattered and split. Great was his woe and great was his sorrow then, for he knew what he must do.

"A hundred days and a hundred nights he labored on the third blade, and as it glowed white-hot in the sacred fires, he summoned his wife. 'Nissa Nissa,' he said to her, for that was her name, 'bare your breast, and know that I love you best of all that is in this world.' She did this thing, why I cannot say, and Azor Ahai thrust the smoking sword through her living heart. It is said that her cry of anguish and ecstasy left a crack across the face of the moon, but her blood and her soul and her strength and her courage all went into the steel. Such is the tale of the forging of Lightbringer, the Red Sword of Heroes. 

"Now do you see my meaning? Be glad that it is just a burnt sword that His Grace pulled from that fire. Too much light can hurt the eyes, my friend, and fire burns." Salladhor Saan finished the last grape and smacked his lips. "When do you think the king will bid us sail, good ser?"

 

[Lady Dacey]

when Gendry reveals to Arya he knows she's a girl

anything with Dolorous Edd 

Tyrion-Bronn interactions 

Aurane Waters in the small council 

 

[Lady Dacey]

Quote

He was there on his knees in the mud when Dolorous Edd came up. "Digging for worms, Sam? Or are you just sick?"

"Sick," said Sam weakly, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. "The smell . . ."

"Never knew Bannen could smell so good." Edd's tone was as morose as ever. "I had half a mind to carve a slice off him. If we had some applesauce, I might have done it. Pork's always best with applesauce, I find." Edd undid his laces and pulled out his cock. "You best not die, Sam, or I fear I might succumb. There's bound to be more crackling on you than Bannen ever had, and I never could resist a bit of crackling." He sighed as his piss arced out, yellow and steaming. "We ride at first light, did you hear? Sun or snow, the Old Bear tells me." 

Sun or snow. Sam glanced up anxiously at the sky. "Snow?" he squeaked. "We . . . ride? All of us?"

I remember laughing out loud when I read this passage in the middle of a crowded subway station. 

[Varysblackfyre321]

7 minutes ago, Lady Dacey said:

when Gendry reveals to Arya he knows she's a girl

anything with Dolorous Edd 

Tyrion-Bronn interactions 

Aurane Waters in the small council 

 

Oh that reminds me: there ruff and tumble while they in the brotherhood were visiting Smallwood; they're banter was hilarious. And honestly heartwarming. 

[Philokles]

Jaime and the Queen of Whores:

Quote

Ser Ryman came stomping up the gallows steps in company with a straw-haired slattern as drunk as he was. Her gown laced up the front, but someone had undone the laces to the navel, so her breasts were spilling out. They were large and heavy, with big brown nipples. On her head a circlet of hammered bronze sat askew, graven with runes and ringed with small black swords. When she saw Jaime, she laughed. "Who in seven hells is this one?"

"The Lord Commander of the Kingsguard," Jaime returned with cold courtesy. "I might ask the same of you, my lady."

"Lady? I'm no lady. I'm the queen."

"My sister will be surprised to hear that."

"Lord Ryman crowned me his very self." She gave a shake of her ample hips. "I'm the queen o' whores."

No, Jaime thought, my sweet sister holds that title too.

 

Or pretty much everything Stannis ever says, for example:

Quote

"Your Grace." The maester took up one of the parchments and cleared his throat. "All men know me for the trueborn son of Steffon Baratheon, Lord of Storm's End, by his lady wife Cassana of House Estermont. I declare upon the honor of my House that my beloved brother Robert, our late king, left no trueborn issue of his body, the boy Joffrey, the boy Tommen, and the girl Myrcella being abominations born of incest between Cersei Lannister and her brother Jaime the Kingslayer. By right of birth and blood, I do this day lay claim to the Iron Throne of the Seven Kingdoms of Westeros. Let all true mendeclare their loyalty. Done in the Light of the Lord, under the sign and seal of Stannis of House Baratheon, the First of His Name, King of the Andals, the Rhoynar, and the First Men, and Lord of the Seven Kingdoms." The parchment rustled softly as Pylos laid it down.

"Make it Ser Jaime the Kingslayer henceforth," Stannis said, frowning. "Whatever else the man may be, he remains a knight."

 

Edd is pretty funny too, but he is there just for comic relief, so Jaime and Stannis have the edge for getting the humour in alongside their major roles.

[Stuart Littlefinger]

Cotter Pyke: We'll defend the wall to the last man.

Dolorous Edd: Probably me.

[Lady Dacey]

51 minutes ago, Varysblackfyre321 said:

Oh that reminds me: there ruff and tumble while they in the brotherhood were visiting Smallwood; they're banter was hilarious. And honestly heartwarming. 

He sniffs her 

She pushes him and makes to run 

He grabs her harm and they fall to the ground together 

She tries to punch him and he laughs 

He tickles her 

She kicks him in the nuts 

"I bet I don't look so good now!!" 

And then the reactions from the brotherhood!! 

I absolutely love the accornhall scene. Arya is the most endearing character to me. 

[Varysblackfyre321]

17 minutes ago, Lady Dacey said:

He sniffs her 

She pushes him and makes to run 

He grabs her harm and they fall to the ground together 

She tries to punch him and he laughs 

He tickles her 

She kicks him in the nuts 

"I bet I don't look so good now!!" 

And then the reactions from the brotherhood!! 

I absolutely love the accornhall scene. Arya is the most endearing character to me. 

Truth be told it's often the moments when she's allowed to be a kid-chasing cats, playing in mud, roughhousing with her friends ect where she truly is just cute.

Her first pov chapter of AFFC  where she's legitimately scared of the Titan of Braavos due to the tales old nan used to take-adorable. 

You know speaking of the brotherhood's reaction I can't help but feel sadness  for lemm a little here; girl n most likely a young one at that in his life that he cared  possibly a daughter or little sister was clearly violated and the way Arya, a slight 10 year old girl looked after the tussling with the 6,0 ft teen male clearly reminded him of that. 

Her defense of Gendry again was heartwarming though; really solidifies how loyal she is to members of what she'd see as her pack.

[Lady Dacey]

32 minutes ago, Varysblackfyre321 said:

You know speaking of the brotherhood's reaction I can't help but feel sadness  for lemm a little here; girl n most likely a young one at that in his life that he cared  possibly a daughter or little sister was clearly violated and the way Arya, a slight 10 year old girl looked after the tussling with the 6,0 ft teen male clearly reminded him of that. 

This is new to me. Who was a girl close to Lem who was violated?