G'Kar Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 [quote name='Myshkin' post='1701648' date='Feb 26 2009, 21.25']Why does everybody have an Abe Vigoda avatar? It's confusing me.[/quote] We are in mourning for a brilliant comedic actor and an inspiring humanitarian. We'll miss you Abe. :cry: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rumarumo Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 Listen, don't agonise over it. You had a go at a guy who not only allowed the door to swing shut on your child, but was entirely unapologetic over it. Even if you did it a little aggressively, it was right. You hit a guy in front of your kids which could only make things worse, and he was turning away. That was wrong, but no lasting damage was done so call it lesson learned and move on. Just be sure to remember if something like that happens again. Oh, and I'd maybe talk to your kids. The whole "kids, violence is wrong" sounds cliché, I know, but at that age they're impressionable, so you probably should explain yourself. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Warg Arry Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 Ah, that really gets to me. whatever happened to common decency? It would have taken that guy less than 2 seconds to hold the door as he was passing for a little girl, who could of used a little consideration. It would have taken less than a breath for her to pass and maybe he could have gotten a smile and a thank you for his troubles. and he could have been on his way. Instead he chose to take 30 seconds to get in the face of the father of the child his action caused harm to. and for his troubles he got knocked down. His attitude is repulsive and a reflection of the absolute decay of social etiquette. Sure there are no rules that say we must hold doors for kids, the elderly, people with armfuls of packages. heck anyone that is in obvious need of a bit of a hand. it just comes down to our basic core of right and wrong. about the fellowship of other human beings. This guy would have made me angry enough to spit as well. The sad reality is though that while there are a large number of people who would have held that door or helped out without a second thought. There will always be one of those tossers in the bunch. and given that we live mostly in highly populated areas. We come across these people often. While he probably deserved a punch in the head. it's likely he didn't have any personal revelation from the altercation and learnt nothing of use from it. It may be a better idea to take from this a lesson. and adopt a better method of dealing with such people in the future. It won't be easy, since such actions will almost always incite a reaction like the one you had. But it can be done and still be satisfying. Children are completely adaptable and perhaps they've not given it a lot of thought. Even so. It's a pretty optimal opportunity to talk about what happened, the guys attitude and what approach might have been better. Also overall how they felt about it. Obviously as an apparently good father that is entirely your prerogative. I have always felt though, never miss an opportunity to pass on a life lesson the easy way, rather than letting them learn it when the personal cost has become higher. Wishing you luck. also you have my sympathy, I'm sorry your daughter got hurt (however minor) and that you were put into that situation at all. I doubt any of us would behave perfectly under those circumstances. And they always say (and it's so true) hindsight is 20/20. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zollo Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 How can anyone possibly have a coherent opinion on this situation? Nothing about that post is clear. To the OP, I don't know whether you are a good or bad parent, but one thing is clear as day: learn to type. Following that get back to us with your case. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Myshkin Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 [quote name='G'Kar' post='1701687' date='Feb 26 2009, 18.55']We are in mourning for a brilliant comedic actor and an inspiring humanitarian. We'll miss you Abe. :cry:[/quote] Did he die? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lord Mord Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 1. It was overreaction 2. It was a bad example 3. It was not terribly manly 4. It was not at all wise 5. I kind of wish I didn't feel good that he suffered for his meanness. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest thebadlady Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 saurian, I am going to do the devil's advocate thing. You can't go touching someone else's kids so what are you supposed to do if a 4 year old makes a run for it and the parent is holding a wee 2 year old (and, I am guessing) bags? Its happened to me and I either shut the door or stood in front of them, distracted them with a oooh shiney and looked to the parent. Kids are a pain in the ass and I am amazed every day that the human race hasn't died off before it got to teenaged years. (aside...maybe thats why it took so long for humans to get on with it - the kids wondered off to pet the siberian tiger) So, all asides aside, the guy was a jerk but there can be a very simple valid reason to shut a door before a child goes through it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eponine Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 You said the guy "basically shut [the door] on her". That doesn't explain whether he did it on purpose or just didn't see her. Because if he did it on purpose, he's a dick and I'm not sorry for him. But if he just didn't see her since two year olds are pretty well under the normal person's line of vision, then I'd have reacted the same way as he did if some stranger got in my face. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Security Squish Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 Where are all the people that were outraged that a shoe got thrown at GWB? That was nothing, this is cold-cocking someone in the temple when they weren't looking. That's cold dude. I know he was a dick but that is assault and a felony. Hopefully you're lucky and he is too embarrassed to press charges. Keep a lid on your temper and all that gets hurt is your ego. If he were actively hurting your child instead of accidentally hitting them with a door and then being a jerk it would be a different matter. It sounds like you were more upset about what he did to you than anything else. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shryke Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 [quote name='thebadlady' post='1701721' date='Feb 26 2009, 22.37']saurian, I am going to do the devil's advocate thing. You can't go touching someone else's kids so what are you supposed to do if a 4 year old makes a run for it and the parent is holding a wee 2 year old (and, I am guessing) bags? Its happened to me and I either shut the door or stood in front of them, distracted them with a oooh shiney and looked to the parent. Kids are a pain in the ass and I am amazed every day that the human race hasn't died off before it got to teenaged years. (aside...maybe thats why it took so long for humans to get on with it - the kids wondered off to pet the siberian tiger) So, all asides aside, the guy was a jerk but there can be a very simple valid reason to shut a door before a child goes through it.[/quote] Very true. But it's his RESPONSE that really shows you what kind of guy he is. Not "Sorry" or "Ooops" or anything like that, but "there's no rule I have to hold doors for kids.". Guy's a complete dick. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
G'Kar Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 [quote name='Myshkin' post='1701716' date='Feb 26 2009, 22.34']Did he die?[/quote] It's Abe Vigoda. He's been legally dead since 1982. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eponine Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 [quote name='Shryke' post='1701725' date='Feb 26 2009, 22.41']Very true. But it's his RESPONSE that really shows you what kind of guy he is. Not "Sorry" or "Ooops" or anything like that, but "there's no rule I have to hold doors for kids.". Guy's a complete dick.[/quote] But if it were an accident, then the reaction of "what the fuck" wouldn't exactly encourage an apologetic response. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shryke Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 [quote name='Eponine' post='1701728' date='Feb 26 2009, 22.44']But if it were an accident, then the reaction of "what the fuck" wouldn't exactly encourage an apologetic response.[/quote] 7If you accidentally close a door on ANYONE (not even a kid) and then when that person goes "WTF?" you go "Hey, fuck you buddy, I don't gotta open the door for you", your a dick. The fact that it's a 2 year old kid just makes this guy a bigger dick. He took his dickatude to that extra level. Pushed it to the limit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mashiara Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 Your wife is right to be angry. You overreacted and you did so in front of your kids, setting a bad example. While the guy was indeed an asshole and I understand that a parent feels overprotective and it might have seemed right at the moment, your post indicates that you hit him because your pride couldn't take his sneering. Many people brought it up before, hitting someone when he's turned away and after you said No problem is not very manly. You also failed to think it through, what would happen if he came after you? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
S John Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 Probably should've let it go in front of the childrens. Re: the sucker punch... dude, the sucker punch is the way to go. I'm not fucking Hulk Hogan, if its really going to come down to fighting, sucker punch his ass and break the fuck out. There's being honorable and risking getting your ass beat, and then there's winning and getting away. I'll take the latter. I can easily count on one hand the amount of fights I've seen where dudes square up like Notre Dame's mascot. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Myshkin Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 [quote name='G'Kar' post='1701726' date='Feb 26 2009, 19.42']It's Abe Vigoda. He's been legally dead since 1982.[/quote] Ah, then we must mourn him. But it's still confusing to have all you Abe Vigodas wandering around here. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dornish Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 Probably wasn't wise. He deserved it. I'm glad you got away with it. As far as the sucker punch goes. All this moralizing is bullshit. In any non regulated physical altercation, the objective is not to be honorable, the objective is to win. It would have been smartest to just let it go. It would have been bravest to not back off (verbally) when he started bullying. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
G'Kar Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 [quote name='Myshkin' post='1701765' date='Feb 26 2009, 23.14']Ah, then we must mourn him. But it's still [b]confusing[/b] to have all you Abe Vigodas wandering around here.[/quote] Now you are a channeling the Abe Vigoda. Well done. All you need now is a pinch of fear and a tablespoon of uncertainty, and you have it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lord O' Bones Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 [quote name='Dornish' post='1701782' date='Feb 26 2009, 20.20']In any non regulated physical altercation, the objective is not to be honorable, the objective is to win.[/quote] This was not a physical altercation until the sucker punch landed. This is key. I will continue to bullshit my way through life not punching people who are turning to leave a verbal altercation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
一方通行 Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 you both acted like jackasses. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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