Crazydog7 Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 It does happen I'm sure the guy didn't mean to hit anyone he was just in hurry. Now there were kids involved so I'll cut you some slack but you do tend to be very combative and something of total asshole when someone disagrees with you (and I'm just talking about what I have gathered from your posting style not real life interactions) Honestly if you drill someone in the temple there is a danger however slight of someone not getting up again. Yes the guy was a total prick but total pricks also have protection under the law in our country however unfortunate that is. "Your Honor the guy was total jackass" would be a very flimsy defense in the unlikely event of an assault and battery trial. However justified you felt you were there might have been better ways to handle it you did the right thing helping out your kids but sending the message that it is ok for them to wail on people in extreme circumstances is probably not the best message. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dornish Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 [quote name='Lord O' Bones' post='1701795' date='Feb 26 2009, 23.27']This was not a physical altercation until the sucker punch landed. This is key. I will continue to bullshit my way through life not punching people who are turning to leave a verbal altercation.[/quote]I tend to disagree. It got physical when unwanted physical contact and implied physical threats were made. Still would have been smarter to ignore it, but a line was crossed. I'm not saying it justifies anything, but I understand. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shryke Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 [quote]It does happen I'm sure the guy didn't mean to hit anyone he was just in hurry.[/quote] The other guy's response would seem to indicate that, even had he not been in a hurry, he wouldn't have cared. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lord O' Bones Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 [quote name='Dornish' post='1701813' date='Feb 26 2009, 20.42']I tend to disagree. It got physical when unwanted physical contact and implied physical threats were made. Still would have been smarter to ignore it, but a line was crossed. I'm not saying it justifies anything, but I understand.[/quote] It was crossed with the poke in the chest, it is true. But it was uncrossed when M didn't do anything about that at the time, gave a verbal signal that he was not going to do so, and then the man disengaged. Do you believe that if M had stayed perfectly motionless and silent at that point he was in any danger whatsoever? Look, if a guy threatens to kick my ass, someone in the background yells "whoo titties!" and he looks, a sucker punch would be appropriate. If he asks me if I want to fight, and I say no, and he turns to leave, a sucker punch is not appropriate. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eponine Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 [quote name='Shryke' post='1701730' date='Feb 26 2009, 22.46']7If you accidentally close a door on ANYONE (not even a kid) and then when that person goes "WTF?" you go "Hey, fuck you buddy, I don't gotta open the door for you", your a dick. The fact that it's a 2 year old kid just makes this guy a bigger dick. He took his dickatude to that extra level. Pushed it to the limit.[/quote] I completely disagree. Someone gets in my face over an unintentional action that doesn't hurt anyone, they're asking for a rude reply. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shryke Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 [quote name='Eponine' post='1701820' date='Feb 26 2009, 23.49']I completely disagree. Someone gets in my face over an unintentional action that doesn't hurt anyone, they're asking for a rude reply.[/quote] 1) He let the door close on someone. That's not "doesn't hurt anyone". That's the kind of shit where a "WTF?" isn't out of line. 2) The kid started crying, which just adds a sweet layer of dickwad icing to this guy's asshole cake. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dornish Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 Yeah, its still not a great idea. But when someone gets threatening my mental state is going to go from "who is this asshole" to "how can I incapacitate him if it comes to it". In that state of mind, if he simultaneously pisses me off and gives me an opening, I can see where I might take it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Warg Arry Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 [quote name='thebadlady' post='1701721' date='Feb 26 2009, 23.37']saurian, I am going to do the devil's advocate thing. You can't go touching someone else's kids so what are you supposed to do if a 4 year old makes a run for it and the parent is holding a wee 2 year old (and, I am guessing) bags? Its happened to me and I either shut the door or stood in front of them, distracted them with a oooh shiney and looked to the parent. Kids are a pain in the ass and I am amazed every day that the human race hasn't died off before it got to teenaged years. (aside...maybe thats why it took so long for humans to get on with it - the kids wondered off to pet the siberian tiger) So, all asides aside, the guy was a jerk but there can be a very simple valid reason to shut a door before a child goes through it.[/quote] So true. I've been in situations like that too. and the conflict and sometimes even guilt about how you're suppose to react. Out shopping with a friend and our baby's (both around 4 months old att) A 4 year old came tearing past us with a woman with an 8 month old and bags hurrying and calling after him. My friend turned and followed the boy to keep track of him and I quickly asked the mother if i could help. she briefly looked me over then handed me the 8 month old (an instant feeling of unease passed over me) and the bags and went into a run. I grabbed an empty trolley nearby and put the bags inside and waited while trying to calm the crying 8 month old. My friend and the mother came back with the struggling 4 year old. She put him into the trolley grabbed her baby said a gruff thanks and walked away. ( I imagine she was a little embarrassed and out of breath) My friend told me that the mother asked her why she didn't just grab her son instead of letting him run off. She told her simply that she was afraid that might of hurt him. We often discuss what the heck are you suppose to do. You want to do the decent thing but there are so many rules. Talking about holding doors for kids. I held the door for a woman and two kids, one of them (looked about 3) decided the doorway was just the right moment to go on a thorough nose picking expedition which obviously needed all of his concentration cause he got a glazed look on his face and wasn't moving. Given I was in a huge hurry I was visited by the want to put my hand on his back and usher him out of the doorway. I looked over and the woman and the other child had already joined the line. So I said to the little boy, you better hurry your mum is already in the line you don't want to miss out. To which the woman snapped, I'm his aunty. I laughed (when I really wanted to snap back at her) and said to the kid, maybe you should get a t shirt, "I'm out with Aunty" on it. Finally the child moved and I left before aunty could say anything else. I get the feeling that the guy in the OP simply didn't see the 2 year old and perhaps his aggression was a combination of reacting to the comment and embarrassment. Still he reads like a self involved tosser and I would be hard pressed not to react in anger had my child been caught by the door and then received that attitude from the person about it. still you raised a very valid point. there are good reasons to shut the door before the child goes through. The problem is having the wherewithal to know when that is the right thing to do. It's just not an easy thing to perceive. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RWHamel Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 The bad news: The cameras probably have a picture of you, your car, and your license plate. You are guilty of assault and battery. The good news: He was a jerk with probably pending warrants, so he split soon after you did. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meili Posted February 27, 2009 Author Share Posted February 27, 2009 Well the kids thing, being a bad example and all, I get. The sucker puch, not so much. I don't know how many fisitcuffs you habe all been in but when taking the fiirst shot, it's best to catch them off guard. Note though, it wasn't like his back was turned or anything he just laughed, gave me a fuck you you ain't going to do shit look and started back to his car. The hit was more of a temply under let eye hit. I might have gave the impression I hurried the kids in the car and hauled ass but it was more of me standing over him for a minute or two, maybe saying things like 'fuck you hillbilly", I can't remmeber but it happened pretty quick. My two year old won't remember it, though when I was giving her a batch tonight I got all piss off again. I mean she ot caught in the door man, at two. Come on. AND the guy was a prick. I know I'll get shit and have got shit about bad parenting skils in this situation but believe it or not, Samatha, my four year old was ready to go at him to for hurting her little sister and I actuallt think I made her proud in her eyes, Walking away in shame after being bullied after a guy hurts your kids would have made me look worse in her eyes. She was laughing about it and my swollen knuckle saying when she grows up no one will ever opck on her sister. I won't stand for fights but anything that brings them closer is good in my book Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crazydog7 Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 [quote name='Meili' post='1701876' date='Feb 27 2009, 00.33']I might have gave the impression I hurried the kids in the car and hauled ass but it was more of me standing over him for a minute or two, maybe saying things like 'fuck you hillbilly", I can't remmeber but it happened pretty quick. She was laughing about it and my swollen knuckle saying when she grows up no one will ever opck on her sister. I won't stand for fights but anything that brings them closer is good in my book[/quote] Oh yeah "fuck you hillbilly is even better." 1. you're daughter has obviously already gleaned from you that it is OK to fight. 2. Just because she agrees with you doesn't make your actions correct she's 4 for god's sake. If you just want us to agree with your course of action....OK but if you want our honest opinions your going to have to give better justification then "come on guys he was asking for it" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meili Posted February 27, 2009 Author Share Posted February 27, 2009 To clarify a few things, I gave the guy the impression he was the man and he started to cockily walk away. With my kids looking on, good call or not, I felt like I had to do something. I hadn;t had time to see if my daughter was ok. The door caught her arm and another customer pushed it open. The 'What the fuck man" was more of a was it an accident question. His response floored me. Another question posed, if he did get up, the kids would leap into my arms as I ran or I would have to finish waht got started. The 'I am an combative shit' is ridiculous. You let someone slam a door on your two year old, and then say no harm no foul doing your best to avoid violence and see where that gets you. And if anyone has ever been in a fight, it is usually best to hit the guy when a) he isn't expecting it b) place it just right and C) chill for a bit and leave before popo gets there. Who ironically weren't even called. All this felony talk is amusing. Popping a guy in the face for hurting your kid is likely to get you a medal, not jail time. But the wife is anti-violence but at the same time EXTREMELY protective of Sarah so I am not totally in the doghouse. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Myshkin Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 How did this thread get so serious? I thought we were talking about Abe Vigoda. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crazydog7 Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 [quote name='Meili' post='1701898' date='Feb 27 2009, 00.51']All this felony talk is amusing. Popping a guy in the face for hurting your kid is likely to get you a medal, not jail time.[/quote] Ok what planet do you live on? A medal? Dear God man. And the guy didn't "slam a door in your daughter's face" he bruised her arm by your own admission. He hurt your kid and he was an asshole he didn't body slam your child kick her in the stomach a few times and walk away. I don't blame you though if anything this whole incident is not only a commentary on how not to behave in a given situation but also tells the entire board a little something about your overall personality. When you were single and didn't have children did you check doorways to make sure they were clear of toddlers? Whatever happened there is no excuse to hit a guy in the temple however you can try to defend sucker punching a guy and hauling ass at the first opportunity all you want. If you cannot admit that there is even the slightest chance that whoever the asshole was didn't see your child then you "are" a combative shit. If a guy pokes you in chest i'd break his finger, quick easy clean without unnecessary exertion or serious penalty you could always fall back on "sorry officer I didn't know my own strength." Now I am off to goggle this Abe Vigoda person. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KazigluBey Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 [quote]Whatever happened there is no excuse to hit a guy in the temple however you can try to defend sucker punching a guy and hauling ass at the first opportunity all you want.[/quote] I know, with myself personally, most of the fights I've been in that I threw the first punch I wasn't even thinking. There's too much adrenaline and tunnel vision to really plan it out. The other guy simply crossed the line, and "chuckling and giving me a condescending look" would probably be enough for me to punch the guy too. But then, I was a kid who was picked on a lot in high school, and once I realized that violence wouldn't kill me I stopped taking shit from people like that. [quote]If a guy pokes you in chest i'd break his finger, quick easy clean without unnecessary exertion or serious penalty you could always fall back on "sorry officer I didn't know my own strength."[/quote] That's quickly followed by a chuck norris style roundhouse kick, right? It's funny how people can rationalize fights like that. Your mind isn't in a normal state when you're in a physical altercation, unless you're a trained fighter or something. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crazydog7 Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 Nah defeating an idiot with wit has always been my forte. I've had to cultivate this over the years because of my disability and comparative lack of physical strength. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RWHamel Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 [quote name='Meili' post='1701898' date='Feb 26 2009, 22.51']All this felony talk is amusing. Popping a guy in the face for hurting your kid is likely to get you a medal, not jail time.[/quote] So your daughter has big black, and blue bruises that you took pictures of, and you took her to the local emergency room, where the doctors examined her, and documented the injury, right? Good luck with that defense. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Progressive Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 [quote name='Crazydog7' post='1701921' date='Feb 26 2009, 22.09']If a guy pokes you in chest i'd break his finger, quick easy clean without unnecessary exertion[/quote] :lol: are you sure you're not steven segal? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sio Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 [quote name='Meili' post='1701898' date='Feb 27 2009, 15.21']To clarify a few things, I gave the guy the impression he was the man and he started to cockily walk away. With my kids looking on, good call or not, I felt like I had to do something. I hadn;t had time to see if my daughter was ok.[/quote] Maybe I'm misunderstanding you here, but... you hit him... to prove you were more manly than this other guy in front of your kids, when it was clear that the guy was about to walk away? Way to go dude. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lokisnow Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 [quote name='Meili' post='1701599' date='Feb 26 2009, 17.49']I stopped for a QT softdrink, they have that crushed ice I love nit I digress. I am walking in the double push doors with my four year old and my two year old. Now common courtesy is to hold if not just nudge the door farther to give them impression of politeness for the person behind you to get through. We He was leaving, i was going in one of the double doors with my four year old and the two year old wandered to the other. The guy not only didn't nudge the door open, he basically shut it on her. She started crying, The guy stopped, looked entirely unaplogetic and I said 'what the fuck man, you didn't see her'? I was mad but squatting down trying to make sure my kids arm was okay. Then the guy, shrugged and said 'there's no rule I have to hold doors for kids......' In hindsight I would have been witteir and calmer but I stood up and asked the obvious "What the fuck did you just say?" Customers started looking on and then this guy, mr. mocho get;s in my face.....like I did something wrong, sitting here with a crying two year old and my four year old looking on and says 'You got a problem with that [b]bud[/b]' With the bud also came with the finger poke in the chest. My adrenaline was kicking and I was totally taken aback because hey, I just wanted a drink and to see if my kid was ok (just a little bruise). I said 'no man, no problem'. He chuckled like I was a pussy and when he started to turn I drilled him right in the temple. He dropped so we didn't stand and throw and he was slowly getting up, a good shot on my part i guess but without seeing if he would get up and a full brawl erupt in front of my kids with dad possibly getting beat down, we bailed. Without the drink I might add. My daughter thought it was the coolest. My wife is mad. I feel pretty good about it and keep going back in my mind because his attitude has me so pissed off I am fantasying about kicking him a few times while he was down..... Overeacted? Parental instincts taken over? Guy deserved it? Bad example for kids? What do you think and could I have handled it differently. I honeslty think though, if I had showed more nonviolent anger at him closing the door on my kid, he would have hit me first, so there is that to consider.[/quote] they tell you to never hit a man with a closed fist, but it is, on occasion, hilarious. :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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