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Dumbest Facebook Statuses, 2


MinDonner

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Iceman,

The spelling makes my head explode. I know I'm bad but at least I try.

To be fair the guy who wrote it was Danish, but it was still REALLY ODD. There was no explanation to why he wrote this either. Is he going to explain his cooking in a PDF, or maybe he's going to put up pictures of fish stock by way of printing PDFs? I have no idea, but there is just no way this could ever make any sense.

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Today I logged in to a friend request from (name)'s Uterus.

I didn't think anything could be worse than the account for the dog, but it turns out I was wrong.

I, for one, am waiting with bated breath to see which body part or house pet friend requests you next.

Today: Uterus, tomorrow: Pancreas? Liver? Gall Bladder? It's an exciting mystery!

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It might be a little sad at my ripe ol' age of almost 29 but it's official- I have Bieber Fever. He's just so stinking cute and such a great little musician. If only I was 14 again!

If the genders were switched, this "guy" would be a pariah.

It is a mystery why women old enough to have children the age of Bieber and Edward/Jacob feel no shame in admitting publicly the only thing stopping them from committing statutory rape is opportunity.

Creepy. As. Hell.

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If the genders were switched, this "guy" would be a pariah.

It is a mystery why women old enough to have children the age of Bieber and Edward/Jacob feel no shame in admitting publicly the only thing stopping them from committing statutory rape is opportunity.

Creepy. As. Hell.

I've applied that to a couple of stories I've heard in the last week or so, and must admit, had there been a dude in the situation instead of a woman, the cops would have been called, immediately. I even told the girl, that having a bunch of kids, playing at your apartment sounds creepy. Everyone laughed it off, and I thought about what the reaction would have been had a male friend shared it instead.

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wow

sometimes ppl take the ppl they love for granted and one day loose them.to every guy out there that has someone they love,dont take ur woman 4 granted and neva let her go cause life is 2 short and u dont want to look back one day and regret loosing the love of ur life and imagine the life u cud of had while u watch her have it wth some1 else

if u do it u will regret it,if u dont it u will regret it,ahh jst do it!

This is exactly the type of person I never want to take advice from.

I don't want to post any of these specifically, but I've had the strangest FB week where most of my FB friends seem to be in dire need of therapy. or a good bar. Everyone has been vaguebooking as if there is going to be a mass suicide soon. its a little disturbing.

I've been getting these too, but from one person. They are specifically about how she wants a do over on her life. I'm sure it makes her husband feel great.

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Thanks, dude. I feel a lot better for knowing that.

Someone posted that? Presumably from their phone while on the toilet? What the hell has the world come to?

ETA: This one isn't stupid, though it did inspire me to have a shower beer after work today. Seemed the appropriate place to share:

Hello Beer? Yeah hi, this is *****. Yeah...I know...been a long time. How are you? Good, good. Hey listen, I was wondering if you wanted to get together tonight? You know, nothing serious or anything, just get together and catch up, talk about the old times a little. Great! I'll pick ya up about 5:01 and we'll see what happens...Can't wait!

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I have nothing against people who believe in God. I mean, if that makes them happy. Great

But enough already with the "sing it from the roof tops" belief in God. That all over my facebook. 3 people have earned the Hide option for this.

And I'm trying to decide if this one will be joining them.

Dare to believe what God says about you.
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I have nothing against people who believe in God. I mean, if that makes them happy. Great

But enough already with the "sing it from the roof tops" belief in God. That all over my facebook. 3 people have earned the Hide option for this.

And I'm trying to decide if this one will be joining them.

I have two frie....acquaintances, really, who post things like this in the afternoon, and then post how drunk/laid/arrested/etc they got last night the next morning.

It drives me insane.

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‎"The Welshman's dishonest, he cheats when he can... and little and dark, more like monkey than man; he works under ground with a lamp in his hat, and he sings far too loud, far too often, and flaaat!"
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