Stannis humor

[Patchface Is AA Reborn]

Still love-

Davos- Lord Celtigar called it admirable

Stannis- Had I shown him the contents of my privy, he would have called that admirable as well

My Favorite Stannis Quote As Well . Made it my sig the day i signed up here

I think Having a Few Beers with Stannis and Dolorus Edd would make my life complete

[Straniero]

I think a Tywin-Stannis conversation would have given new meaning to the terms terse and business-like (the humor would come when each would bitch about having to deal with the other in private I'd imagine). Stannis on the small council with Varys, Littlefinger and Pycelle would have been full of good material for this thread though!

My favorite quote is still the irritated, but matter-of-fact way he responds to the Queen's men while stubbornly marching his troops through the storm in ADWD:

Clayton Suggs - "A sacrifice will prove our faith still burns true, Sire."

Godry the Giantslayer - "The old gods of the north have sent this storm upon us. Only R'hllor can end it. We must give him an unbeliever."

Stannis - "Half my army is made up of unbelievers. I will have no burnings. Pray harder."

"Pray harder." Not even an exclamation point! If you think he is being dismissive, it is funny because of how dismissive it is. If you think he is serious, it is funny because he means it. It is a perfect combo of irritated and having no patience for something non-tangible. :P

[Monty501]

Littlefinger: "To his face we call him Lord Eunuch.”

- Littlefinger talking about Varys

[Lord Over]

Stannis - "Half my army is made up of unbelievers. I will have no burnings. Pray harder."

Epic! :laugh:

[Dornish Bannerman]

Stannis is such a great character. I love his unintended puns, and dry jokes.

[Fylimar]

Great thread. I always liked Stannis wonderful one-liners. He reminds me a little bit of Sheldon Cooper sometimes. And how he never seemed impressed or frigthened by anything - just giving those dry remarks (like 'pray harder' - mentioned above).

I really hope, he makes it through the story alive - and yes, we really need a council meeting scene with Stannis, Renly, Varys, Littlefinger and Ser Barristan. Hopefully, some POV character remembers (that alone would be a very good reason to make either Varys, Barristan or Littlefinger a POV character... But Barristan had one POV chapter when Dany was gone - or am I remember wrong?)

[the Scorpion Knight]

Stannis is such a great character. I love his unintended puns, and dry jokes.

I think they are intended

[Not_a_Lady_Brienne]

I am like everyone else, and never really cared for the guy untill the second time through. But now it's like I never bent the knee for the young wolf. I am just so afraid for him in TWoW, he has survived improbably for 4 books now and his position is more tenous then ever.

I'm so worried for him too! As soon as I started to really care for him, he may be dead. I am really hoping his excellent record of winning battles, finding out about Karstark in time, and the tension between the parties in Winterfell will tip the odds in his favor. But then again his army is frozen and starving :frown5:

[Lady Winter Rose]

My favorite parts of Stannis' jokes is that he is dead serious during all of them. lol my brother made up this adjective called Caligular (something Caligula would do. Kill your father, fuck your sister, make your horse a senator etc). However it seems like Stannis is one of the only characters who doesn not behaive Caligular

His words are Caligula. I think Caligula said "I want that all Romans have one head because it would be more easy to beheaded it."

That's crazy. Stannis words were crazy.

[Blisscraft]

Jon: "The freefolk despise kneelers. . . Let them keep their pride and they will love you better."

Stannis: "It is swords I need from them, not kisses."

[Red Lion]

- You reproach yourself more than I ever could, Your Grace. You must have these great lords to win your throne-

- Fingers and all, it seems. Stannis smiled grimly.

[Teddard Snark]

Try saying this one in a Groucho Marx voice while rolling your eyes and twiddling an imaginary cigar:

"In your bed, she's like to stay that way."

Works, doesn't it?

I'd have warmed up to Stannis more by now if not for the whole murdering-his-brother thing. But it seems to know he's doomed/cursed for kinslaying, but he's pushing ahead anyway. A fascinating character that at first seemed kinda boring.

[Bride of Winter]

I think most of the things Stannis says were already mentioned, but his interactions with Jon always crack me up

"Why do you think I abandoned Dragonstone and sailed to the Wall, Lord Snow?"

"You came because we sent for you, I hope. Though I could not say why you took so long about it."

"His grace is going fond of you."

"I can tell. He only threatened to behead me twice.'

[assjfjgjsgjljljglgjfjsduar]

I think most of the things Stannis says were already mentioned, but his interactions with Jon always crack me up

"Why do you think I abandoned Dragonstone and sailed to the Wall, Lord Snow?"

"You came because we sent for you, I hope. Though I could not say why you took so long about it."

"His grace is going fond of you."

"I can tell. He only threatened to behead me twice.'

Jon and Stannis have a great bromance going on. They bicker like a stodgy old married couple. I love it.

[Not_a_Lady_Brienne]

Oooh found another one:

Jon: "The talk was all over Castle Black. If you must know, I had the tale from Gilly."

Stannis: "Who is Gilly?"

Melisandre: "The wet nurse. Your Grace gave her freedom of the castle."

Stannis: "Not for running tales. She's wanted for her teats, not her tongue. I'll have more milk from her, and fewer messages."

[assjfjgjsgjljljglgjfjsduar]

Oooh found another one:

Jon: "The talk was all over Castle Black. If you must know, I had the tale from Gilly."

Stannis: "Who is Gilly?"

Melisandre: "The wet nurse. Your Grace gave her freedom of the castle."

Stannis: "Not for running tales. She's wanted for her teats, not her tongue. I'll have more milk from her, and fewer messages."

Off-topic, but I was touched by the fact that Norrey and ... Wull? Flint? ... whoever it was, the older clan chiefs who couldn't go off with Stannis, reaffirm how much they really hate wildlings, yet they each brought a wet nurse for Mance's (really Gilly's) baby. D'aw.

[Babeldygob]

I really want to see a conversation between Stannis and Tyrion because of this. Their sense of humor is kind of the same but in a totally different way.

[assjfjgjsgjljljglgjfjsduar]

I really want to see a conversation between Stannis and Tyrion because of this. Their sense of humor is kind of the same but in a totally different way.

They both have kind of a dry, sardonic wit going on. I think Tyrion's is more "out there" because he's a POV character and we can see his thoughts.

For some reason, the Tyrion line that makes me crack up the most every time isn't even a line, it's a thought. Oberyn tells Tyrion that he and Elia were close, much like Jaime and Cersei. Tyrion thinks, Gods I hope not. That's the same sort of humor Stannis uses when he says, "I won't have that abomination here, this isn't King's Landing."

[dtones520]

How I wish Stannis was a POV. I'd love to know what goes on in that shiny dome of his. He is easily my favorite non-POV, and possibly my favorite, character in the whole story. Here's to hoping he doesn't die.

[Independent George]

How I wish Stannis was a POV. I'd love to know what goes on in that shiny dome of his. He is easily my favorite non-POV, and possibly my favorite, character in the whole story. Here's to hoping he doesn't die.

I don't think there's much mystery to Stannis. I'm pretty sure that everything that Stannis says also pretty much exactly what he's thinking.