Howlin' Howland

No Country for Old Ben (an HBO show about Obi-Wan Kenobi's time on Tatooine)

1) 5)  Purrrrrr... love us... Seeking home!

2) 1)  Adorable niche incarnate mousetrap. Adopt, love.

3) 2)  Ser opts for transfer!

My Best Friend's Bedding (a first hand account of the Westerosi bedding ceremony)

1) 5)  Try our notorious, genuine, used exsanguinator.

2) 7)  Glamorous object... Tyrion's? Yours! (Authentic!)

3) 1)  Tilted, ornate. Narrow grip. Unique execution.

Buffy the Vampire Flayer (A story about Buffy Bolton)

Dude (a movie about a friend calling out Paul Atreides)

Citizen Bane (A remake of The Dark Knight Rises)

Fuck Soup (a Marx Brothers film about their hatred of soup)

It's a Wonderful Lime (a training film about agriculture focusing on citrus)

Mimecop (Jean-Claude Van Damme plays a cop who's also a mime)

Last & Furious (An HBO show about people's reaction to a zombie apocalypse caused by fungus)

SuperFan (A story about a celebrity stalker)

The Fast of Us (A biography of Usain Bolt)

Thot (a movie about the skankiest Asgardian in the Marvel Cinematic Universe)

Raw & Order (a show about a sushi restaurant)

Of Lice and Men (a hygiene film)

1) 4)  Highly limited offering! Maester’s extraordinary hagiography!

2) 6)  Hark: Limited, original manuscript! Elegant! Handwritten!

3) 5)  Honor luminesces over my engraved history

Some amazingly good entries for what I thought was a brutally difficult round.  Well done.

A Clash of Wings (a show about Super Bowl snacks)

Cocky (a movie about a heavyweight champion boxer who underestimates his next opponent)

Top Pun (a competition to make up the best puns)

20 hours ago, Jez Bell said:

Hola fellow phobics!

Anyone interested in a new game?  As it turns out, I have some hosting time available.

@Howlin' Howland @Dolorous Gabe @Ser Not Appearing @Fragile Bird @Julia H. @RhaenysBee @rocksniffer @a free shadow @Castellan

Yes.

I think we've done this before.

Change one letter in the title of a movie, TV show, or book to completely change its meaning.

For example, change Star Wars to Star Cars a show about celebrity automobiles.

Breaking Bed (a porno)

Jews (just when you thought it was safe to go back in the synagogue)

The worst part about hosting a game is that you don't get to play.  Here's some ideas I had:

Round 1: (Pryat Pree)

Wasting a savage Valyrian bitch

Round 2: (Bloodraven)

Monstrous, terrifying piece of loathsomeness.

Round 3 (Quaithe)

Pretentious counselor provides generous exposition.

Round 4 (Melisandre)

We’ll calmly justify murdering humans.  Wildfire!!!

Round 5 (Jojen Reed)

Even fucking Bran verily undermines undead nonsense.

Round 6 (Qyburn)

Get the corpse prepared.

Round 7 (White Walkers)

Icy joyless yokels.

Ser wins the final round to finish in second.  A free shadow ruins his bid for a perfect 1 point game.  Rocksniffer continues his trend of scoring well when he doesn't vote.  And Castellan secures the win for this game.

Final Standings:

Castellan 71+8=79

Ser Not Appearing 54+17=71

Dolorous Gabe 54+11=65

Jez Bell 54+8=62

Fragile Bird 48+3=51

rocksniffer 32+15=47

RhaenysBee 31+4=35

Eternally_His 11

a free shadow 1+1=2

Thank you to all who played and I hope you enjoyed the game.   Congrats to the winner, Castellan 

Round 7 Results:

1. Hells' lifeless resuscitations: chilling glaciation haunts mankind. (Dolorous Gabe) 1+1+1+3+3+2=11

2. Crystal frozen bodies that render death! (Fragile Bird) 1+1+1=3

3. Holy lolly, revenge coldly: gelid hordes march! (RhaenysBee) 1+1+1+1=4

4. Harken! Library reveals Cold Gods' hidden mythology. (Jez Bell) 1+1+2+1+2+1=8

5. Chilly fellows brazenly trafficking reanimated draftees. (rocksniffer) 1+1+3+1+2+3+2+2=15

6. Cold foreigners! Baby traders! Rotten DEVILS!!! (Castellan) 1+1+2+3+1=8

7. Cold, frigid bastards try ruining daylight. (Ser Not Appearing) 1+1+3+2+3+3+4=17

a free shadow 1=1