Pallantides

Very nice my good ser!! I take it you are a musician as well? It was brilliant, & the only thing I'd change would be on the last part...

"The horn that wakes the sleepers, the shield that guards the realms of men."

It flows a tad better if it ends on "...guards the realms" IMO, 'of mens' breaks up the flow a bit, as well as the very last line, I think it sounds good but make it'and the gate was held. But its awesome either way!

Thanks for the compliment and critique. I'm not really a musician (I do play guitar and drums occasionally), but this was the first time I've ever really written anything like that (I used to write Haikus, but that's not been for a long time or even in the same vein).

I agree with you in regards to the flow. I think it feels better with your suggestion. Though the "He held the gate" part was an homage to Jon's line. Reading it again, I think I could probably arrange the last line as this:

They were the sword in the darkness and the watcher on the walls,

the fire that burns against the cold, the light that brings the dawn.

The horn that wakes the sleepers, the shield that guards the realms of.

And forever will we remember how these six brave men passed on.

And just end it there.

I wasn't sure where to post this, so I figured I'd share it here. I wrote a ballad for Grenn and the five men he took with him to hold the gate. The fact that he got a very heroic death unlike the majority of characters in the show is what spurred me to write this (and I liked his actor and I'm sad to see him go).


The watchers stood upon the wall,
Stewards and rangers are we;
On that day the wildings came,
They thought they'd be set free.

It could be said they had the strength.
To march upon us in such force.
They lit the biggest fire the North had ever seen;
They'd kill without remorse.

They advanced without relent,
Marching through arrows and more.
The outer gate was being breached,
When Grenn stepped to the fore.

I had to send him down to the tunnels.
I told him to hold the gate.
He took five men; Hyll, Cooper and three more
Hopefully it would not be too late.

The giant was getting through,
It charged like a raging boar.
He roared aloud with thunder,
We stand fast or we'll be no more.

He gleamed like a star
And the sound of his sword was like a raging storm
Proudly the ranger challenges the doom.
Vowing to slay this unkown life form.

They were the sword in the darkness and the watcher on the walls,
the fire that burns against the cold, the light that brings the dawn.
The horn that wakes the sleepers, the shield that guards the realms of men.
These six brave men passed on.

He held the gate.

Lightbringer with the Celtic sword Claidheamh Solais, meaning "Sword of Light". Appears in a number of oral Irish folk tales. It's most prominent featuring in the story "Adventure in the Otherworld". Also prominent in the song "Claidheamh Solais" by the band Doomsword. With lyrics such as:

Through the tales

The legend lived

A Sword of Salvation

At the side of

The greatest kings

Brought Hope and Destruction

A light that shone

Of ancient strength,

Arose from the Earth

From green misty hills

To swing in frostbitten lands

Forged by the Gods

The Sword that was made for Man

Caladvwlch, bring us all to Victory!

Blade of Doom, ruler of Man's Destiny!

I chant your countless names:

Sword of Light, Sword of Doom

Caladcholg

The rainbow beam

Connacht's Defender

Caliburn

Cymric Heir

Of the best of Eireann

A golden hilt

For a silver hand

Who ruled the first reign

Crusher of Evil

Its power will one day return

When the white lord is vanquished

The fire of our faith will burn

Caladvwlch, bring us all to victory!

Blade of Doom, ruler of Man's Destiny!

I chant your countless names:

Sword of Light, Sword of Doom

(Emphasis mine)

Obviously featured in these stories are fighting giants (usually of ice), or some other creature, as well as a bridal task (either related to getting a bride or some other sort of task relating to the wife of the character or the wife of someone else in the story).

I've mentioned this before, but it was in another thread that got buried, but I figured I might as well add it here. It certainly seems fitting enough.