Agreed, but war also cleanses, and can be extremely transformative especially for the weaker groups in society, i.e. bastards, cripples and and broken things (read women) :) So, this is why we see bastards like Jon Snow actually getting a chance to command, along with the yet unknown for Robert's bastards like Gendry, Edric and Mya, and Tyrion is poised for great things too. But, i'm most excited for what it means for women now that all the old patriarchs are dead/dying. They have a real chance to make inroads and not be restricted to mere marriage pawns!
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[twow Spoilers] Arianne II, Part 2