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About Dracarya

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    And though she be but little, she is fierce
  • Birthday 12/18/1991

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  1. Dracarya

    Feminism - Post-apocalypse version

    Well, I'm back, even if it is just a flying visit. This site doesn't work well on my phone. Thanks Lyanna for dragging me here I have so many thoughts, on so many subjects, but I'll keep it brief for now. I wanted to touch on what was mentioned earlier, the idea that, if you don't call out every instance of sexism you come across, you're a bad feminist. I've wrestled with that a lot, as my FB friends may recall, after getting shouted at by some men in a van, & I just sat there in frightened silence. How can I preach to others to fight misogyny if I don't practice it? I realised that I can only do my best, when it's safe to. But I also realised that I don't always have the energy. I recently had some wonderful discussions on Twitter with some enlightened folk - including an MRA, an anti-feminist account & an "I'm not like other women" woman - about how I didn't change my name when I got married. Apparently, this means that I am a lesser woman, not suitable to "breed", and my marriage is a sham. Which is always good to hear. That fun experience left me drained, but I jumped straight back in the saddle and began arguing with some other fool about abortion. I stood as a movement builder for the Women's Equality Party over here (& lost. I think I'm too much for them tbh), and one of my key goals was to push for social media sites to be held accountable for cyberbullying and harassment. The thing that pushed me to stand as a candidate was, after one argument on FB about the tampon tax, a guy messaged my work's FB page, complaining about me. Because a woman disagreed with him on social media, he found it appropriate to potentially jeopardise her job. Thankfully, his shit wasn't taken seriously, but I shudder to think what might have happened if my company had reacted differently. Anyway. My point is that, while I try to call everything out, it's not always possible. My aunt keeps addressing stuff to "Mr & Mrs Partner's Surname", even though she knows I didn't change my name. I've mentioned it once to her, but if she continues, it's really not worth the ball ache. Side note: I'm glad to see so many old faces here, & I hope you're all doing well. I'm also glad to see this Feminism thread still going strong
  2. Dracarya

    What's it like where you live?

    I reckon it depends on where you go. In Plymouth, there are a lot of Navy lads who go out on the lash and get into fights, so I could see it happening in a strong-military place. Could happen in Cornwall too. But that's when obnoxious personalities meet copious amounts of alcohol and result in fisticuffs. Brits on holiday are horrendous; please don't take them as a good representative of the rest of us. Helena mentioned the lack of community in bigger cities. London is a country of its own, but I live in East Hertfordshire now, and find it very pleasant. It's closer to London (by car, anyway), has a taste of the modern side of London, but is still growing, and the people are generally polite and friendly. It took me a year to meet my neighbours in Plymouth - one of them came round after a couple of weeks here to introduce herself, and when our cat went missing, another called me to ask whether I'd found her. So yeah, community very much depends on the place. I love being British, but Britain is starting to get on my nerves. It's in a state of turmoil at the moment, what with the NHS up in arms, different unions striking every five minutes, Brexit, and the Tories, of course. Britain is expensive - house prices through the roof, cost of general living too high - and the long winter has been going on far too long. But I couldn't live anywhere else.
  3. Dracarya

    Awesome. Awesome to the max.

    19 days until we move into our new place! *happydance*
  4. Dracarya

    Fashion thread: updating classics

    I knew you'd come through :) I don't like knee high, and black is my colour. I have enough furry boots, and I don't like boots with a lot of detail on them. I currently have some leather ankle boots, totally plain, which I'm wearing all the time, but they're starting to rip :( they were from Asda, and cost like £12, so no big surprise, but still. I think I need to go boot hunting in town, try them on and see what suits me.
  5. Dracarya

    Fashion thread: updating classics

    My goal in life is to be as cool as Bowie. Today I'm wearing leggings, ha, a black t shirt and a colourful kimono - covered in leaves and feathers in blues and greens and pinks. My office is pretty relaxed with what we wear, but I'm having to put together some nicer outfits. And I think I need new boots. ES, work your magic. :P
  6. Dracarya


    We've bombed the house, the last time being only a couple of weeks ago. I only tend to find a flea on me when I've had the cats on/near me. Guess I'll just have to welcome our new blood-ducking overlords.
  7. Dracarya


    We use Frontline. What is it with my cats then? Kissd: Thank you! I'll look into it.
  8. Dracarya


    My mum is waging a losing battle with Nala. His current sleeping spot is her washing basket, and she's constantly trying to shoo him out, but he always jumps straight back in. I told her to put her clothes away, but she doesn't listen, and so Nala will continue to sleep on them. Pick your battles, woman, Nala will always win this one.
  9. Dracarya


    I'll look into it! We use a spot-on formula, it goes on the back of their neck and is supposed to last a month, but they still bring fleas in. One jumped in my tea today :crying: How gross is that? Makes me feel like my house is unclean. Eta: I checked, and it needs a vets prescription. It is on Amazon, but it's over £40 for 6 tablets, so 3 months. Not something I can afford right now. Damn.
  10. Dracarya


    Thank you! I was hoping for some natural (and cheap) ideas. I might try the lemon thing. Disgusting little buggers.
  11. Dracarya


    :lol: How do you guys stop outdoor cats from bringing millions of fleas into the house? Collars are useless - they will get them off - we do a spot-on treatment once a month, and we have those lights that attract fleas and kill them. We also do those flea bomb things a few times a year. And yet, fleas. They're so disgusting, and drive me mad. Any tips?
  12. Dracarya


    Funny, tonight Nala has become extremely fussy - he's sleeping in my room for the first time in a month, and even followed me to the toilet, even though I'm sure he was just fast asleep. Weird cat.
  13. Dracarya


    They're also stars on instagram. Books, blogging? Nah, show us your cats!
  14. Dracarya


    My cats do kill other creatures. Whenever I'm ill, I will wake up at least once to a dead mouse on the floor. I guess they think I can't hunt while I'm ill :dunno: Other than that, my cats do eat what they catch. It is nature, and you can't stop them if they go outside, but I don't like seeing it. Kiara is the softer cat with humans - she loves everyone, and would never hurt you. But she's vicious when it comes to killing other animals. I had to rescue a mouse from her because she put it in the bath and was toying with it. I thought, huh, clever, but really fucking mean, so I caught it and let it go outside. Though they are good when we've had infestations. One year over Christmas we had mice in our living room, and the cats just waited patiently by and got rid of all of them. I'm not saying it's nice, but it's certainly effective. To combat that with a nice story, Nala used to visit an old man who lived across the road (who my mum cared for), and sit in his garden. A butterfly once landed on Nala's nose, and he tried to lick it. He looked genuinely sad when it flew away.
  15. Dracarya


    Some people just don't like dogs. I didn't, before spending time with my SO's mum. She looks after loads of different dogs, and it changes my perspective. But, despite the above, I wouldn't want to own a dog. I'd never hurt an animal, even if I don't particularly like them (but with spiders, all bets are off).