Scott Lynch Posted August 7, 2006 Share Posted August 7, 2006 THE GENTLEMAN BASTARD COCKTAIL CONTEST The powers that be can make this sticky or something if they like; I don't want to exceed my authority (which is, how do we say, "nonexistant?"), of course. Earlier in this thread, people were nattering a bit about creating a cocktail; the idea tickles me so much I'd like to announce a contest. Your Task: Create a cocktail recipe called "The Gentleman Bastard." The Judges: Judging will be carried out by myself and my lovely fiancee, Jenny-- who will, in fact, be my lovely wife by the time this contest ends. I will give you until...Friday, September 8. After that, Jen and I will sit down with the recipes, make them, and start drinking. Judging may be carried out over a period of several days depending on how many entrants we have. Judging will be based on two things-- the overall tastiness of the drink and/or cleverness of ingredients. Tastiness will probably predominate. I'm aware that these are really subjective criteria, but between Jen and myself you have two very stubborn people with very different tastes butting skulls, so each recipe should get a fair tasting. Promise. The Limitations: I hate Tequila, so do't even go there. Jen can't touch chocolate, so anything like Kahlua is out of the question. In fact, Jen suffers from several debilitating food allergies-- so no nuts, no chocolate, and no cream or milk products. Other than that, I think anything is fair game. Mind you, recipes that specify extremely exotic or expensive ingredients, like $300-a-bottle single malts, may be "accidentally" lost in the shuffle. ;0 So by all means recommend the brands of liquor you think best, but keep it reasonable. The Prize: One lucky winner will face Kurgan atop a deserted New York City factory in the pouring rain and be allowed to cut his head off, thereby attaining immortality in a really cool-looking esplosion of lightning and stuff. What? That's lame? Okay. In lieu of that, I will mail the winner a complete manuscript of Red Seas Under Red Skies, tape-bound and set in a nice plastic cover (yay Kinko's), signed and annotated by me. Please note that I will not do this until the ARCs of Red Seas are ready to go out. Think of it as a one-of-a-kind ARC. Also, your cocktail will be proclaimed the true Gentleman Bastard. Because I have that power, totally. I'm like Serpentor. "This I command!" One runner-up will get an 8-1/2" by 11" map of the region of Locke's world covered in Red Seas, signed and colored by moi. All participants may receive drunken rambling if I log on immediately after testing your recipes. Hell, I may even live-post the process or something. I think that covers everything. Please note that this contest was not initiated by the moderators of asoiaf.westeros.org, that I do not represent them or their official position on imbibing large quantities of liquor, and that they are not responsible for anything done in relation to this contest, including anything I might type while smashed out of my gourd. Cheers and best, SL P.S. Please feel free to post recipes here if you like, but please e-mail your 'official' entries to me at [email protected]. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xray the Enforcer Posted August 7, 2006 Share Posted August 7, 2006 WE WILL PWN YOU ALL. (and anyone who reads my LJ will realize that we're already working on the damned thing. then again, we've been accused of "drinking like old people," so there will be no foofy-ness in this drink. booze, booze, and more booze.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
niamh Posted August 7, 2006 Share Posted August 7, 2006 No Kahlua's, no Bailey's .................. grumble grumble All my ideas have fallen through already Can I use Calvados? Or do I have to mail you some :cool: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scott Lynch Posted August 7, 2006 Author Share Posted August 7, 2006 Bailey's may actually be cool; I'll double-check with Jen when she gets home tonight. Her aversion to dairy is not *universal,* just pervasive enough that I'm taking the easy way out. And I like Calvados. Cheers! SL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RaceBannon42 Posted August 7, 2006 Share Posted August 7, 2006 Damn.... Why dont you just give it to the X's and make it easy on the rest of us. I may have to break out the keys to the liquor cabinet for this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jaxom 1974 Posted August 7, 2006 Share Posted August 7, 2006 That's a hella big gauntlet you're throwin' down, Xs' May we simple peons compete as well? I think I might have an idea or three (even if I'm not in your league!) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ran Posted August 7, 2006 Share Posted August 7, 2006 Oh-ho, Linda's bartending brother is visiting tomorrow. I guess he's getting drafted... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mya Stone Posted August 7, 2006 Share Posted August 7, 2006 Oh jeez! *checks her "Bunny's Bartending Guide" (kidding...) I'll start concocting though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ser Paladin Posted August 7, 2006 Share Posted August 7, 2006 Having read the many interesting and "era-appropriate" food descriptions in LLL, I'll submit something fitting the analagous time frame. Since Locke already invented a Rum & Beaujolais faux-brandy combo in the book (and bravo on that bit of inspiration, by the way), I'll assume that recipe is out of bounds. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xray the Enforcer Posted August 7, 2006 Share Posted August 7, 2006 ha. what is a contest without the chuzpah?! even if we don't win, I wanna crack at that book early. Dammit. I'll devise a themed coctkail for the winner. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bazzlebane Posted August 7, 2006 Share Posted August 7, 2006 Okay, a creative idea is slowly taking shape in my mind. Only problem is I fear it might taste like ass. We shall see. ETA: Did I say ass? I meant to say exotically delicious. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MeanMrMustard Posted August 7, 2006 Share Posted August 7, 2006 Muddle freshly squeezed lime juice, a touch of simple syrup and a delicate pinch of mint leaves. Add ice, good gin and a barely perceptible dash of dry vermouth. Shake. Pour into cocktail glass. Add a splash (1/2 oz) of cherry brandy. Note: This might be a joke. Feel free to try it and report back, though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xray the Enforcer Posted August 7, 2006 Share Posted August 7, 2006 you forgot the most important part, MMM: Steal $1000 from the till. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
caladanbrood Posted August 8, 2006 Share Posted August 8, 2006 I knew there was an advantage to working in a bar... practice makes perfect, after all:D Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr. X Posted August 8, 2006 Share Posted August 8, 2006 Wow, a chance to win a prize for doing something we were going to do anyway. It's like getting paid to eat breakfast. I think Race has the most intelligent comment in this thread by far. Oh, and Scott, we worked up two recipies tonight already. Not sure yet if we'll send them right out or work up a list first. Do the rules require that you first shackle yourself to the bar and mix the cocktails blindfolded? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
guipago Posted August 8, 2006 Share Posted August 8, 2006 Ha! I knew I'd registered for this place waaaaaaaayyyy back before TLOLL came out. Well... make that wayyyy... It was only back in May. Yay! Anyway, I'm the Jenn that Scott talks about. As for my allergies and booze preferences: Bailey's is out. However, drinks with half and half are in. Kahlua is out. Most everything else is in. Except that Scott isn't into Tequila Good luck and I can't wait to try your drinks out! Always! Jenn Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jaxom 1974 Posted August 8, 2006 Share Posted August 8, 2006 Awww...got my potential recipe...let the experimenting begin! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RaceBannon42 Posted August 8, 2006 Share Posted August 8, 2006 Ha! I knew I'd registered for this place waaaaaaaayyyy back before TLOLL came out. Anyway, I'm the Jenn that Scott talks about. As for my allergies and booze preferences: Good luck and I can't wait to try your drinks out! Always! Jenn Hi Jenn, welcome aboard! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TerraPrime Posted August 8, 2006 Share Posted August 8, 2006 Fabulous contest! I wish I drink! Still, I'll live vicariously through the efforts from you all. I eagerly await the formal submissions. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BranTheBuilder Posted August 8, 2006 Share Posted August 8, 2006 hmm, time to start playing around with the drinks cabinet! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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