Goodkind XII

[Spectralist]

I think having a character call people ‘darlin’’(or muttering ‘bags’ etc) every here and there is about as close as Terry can come to infusing his characters with personality.

[avenger12]

Why doesn't Richard just build another statue to show people that life is worth living? Sure, the first one got destroyed, but it sure was effective. It turned Nicci to the side of "good" (using this term very loosely) which brings me to my next point. It seems redemption is possible in these books. Look at Nicci and the Mord Sith. These people worked for the side of evil, have killed dozens if not hundreds of people, and yet are now Richard's top lieutenants. So, it seems a bit odd to me that their first instinct when encountered by a foe is not to sway them to the side of "good" but instead kill them by blowing melon sized holes through their bodies, cutting of their testicles and making them eat it, or kicking them in the jaw... Then again, I've noticed a similarity between all the people that have found redemption. All of them are hot, big breasted females that want to bang Richard. So, if Richard doesn't find you attractive and you're working on the side of "evil", especially if you're under the age of 12, I guess you're screwed.

[TheVatican]

Then again, I've noticed a similarity between all the people that have found redemption. All of them are hot, big breasted females that want to bang Richard. So, if Richard doesn't find you attractive and you're working on the side of "evil", especially if you're under the age of 12, I guess you're screwed.

Yes, the blacksmith was a hot big breasted woman. As were some, of his other business contacts. Not to mention all the other people in the Old World that Richard impacted, all woman of course with large breasts. All the rebels in the Old World were woman right. Hell, because I am so clever, I can even surmise that all the rebels in the Old World are women because all the men are obviously fighting in the New World, therefore, only woman are left in the Old World, therefore, giving more strength to the proposition that the people that Richard saves are woman. Because as we all know,

per Avenger 12 "Then again, I've noticed a similarity between all (emphasis mine)the people that have found redemption"

See I can also use circular logic to make clever little remarks

The problem with saying clever little remarks, is that when they are not so clever and can be easily dispelled by a brief review of the story, you will be shown to be wrong.

To answer your first question, there is another statue being built in the Old World. It is being built by Richards converted women with big breasts.

"So, it seems a bit odd to me that their first instinct when encountered by a foe is not to sway them to the side of "good" but instead kill them by blowing melon sized holes through their bodies, cutting of their testicles and making them eat it, or kicking them in the jaw

Ever hear of the combination of words, self-defense? When once is attempting to save their lives and those of innocents in their lives, fighting those that are an immediate threat is moral. The guy who ate his Pee Pee, was one that cruel by choice. He lived in a world where he could choose to live how he wanted. He chose to be a pedophile rapists who was actively fighting Richard and Kahlan and who had possession of a small boy that was Kahlan and richars friend. He had it coming, not to mention I believe (not sure of this) that this guy was responsible for killing most of Kahlan's sister confessors. The girl he kicked in the mouth was a sadistic little girl (again raised in a world where she had the ability to chose between a world of freedom or of subjugation, she made her choice)that was in the process of torturing him. He did attempt to prevent her from doing what she was doing, she stated that it was her choice and her decision. Richard put a stop to it and protected himself. He had attempted to lash out at Denna in the past and it has gone bad for him, yet he continues to fight her and eventually got his freedom.

The melon sized holes through enemies. I am not sure what specific incident you are talking about, however, the ones that I remember, the individual was attacking them and the holes through them were done in self defense. If I am being attacked, you better believe that I will defend myself.

I will note that it has been the New worlder's that have allowed the innocents and those that weren't a threat to remain alive. It has been the IO that has made it clear, that even, if they submitt, they will be raped and treated like crap, simply for not believing in what htey believe.

I will also note, that in some case, some of the decision that Richard has made, he has admitted have been wrong, and works to change them and fix them. It is not a book about a perfect being, it is a story about am individual who is lacking in certain knowledge and experiences and makes the best choices he can, given his surroundings. His basic view of life is not changed, even given those outside forces. Though he recognizes when he is wrong and rectifies his position.

[Marcelo Rebelo Firqoralas]

Ooh! Someone's actually prepared to defend Goodkind! Haven't seen that in a while.

This should be entertaining.

[Moosicus]

~The Vatican,

Victor and the others in the old world that were part of the uprising were never actively (to the best of our knowledge) on the side of evil, so the size of their boobs is irrelevant.

As for self defense, what threat was Gadi when Kahlan ordered him to be tortured by Cara all night long? None, she had him tortured purely out of spite because he'd knifed Warren. Demmin Nass, though a cruel pedophile and a murderer who was in charge of the quads who killed all the other Confessors, had been taken by Kahlan's power already. Punishing him by making him sever and subsequently eat his own testicles was pointless, who he had been was already destroyed. He was no longer a threat to anybody, and never would be. When Richard kicked Violet, Denna had already taken the Agiel away from her, and Richard understands at that point that it is Denna, not the Queen or Violet that has the power there. Violet was no threat to Richard, and despite Violet's spoken threats about Kahlan, Richard believed that she was far from Violet's grasp, and therefor safe. So why kick Violet except out of spite? And as for Violet's "choice"? She's what? nine? ten? She was being raised by a bitch, to be a monster. Not totally her choice.

As for who lets people live and die, and who does the raping, you're right. Richard's side has not been committing any rapes that we're aware of (though I wonder what his forces will really be up to while in the Old World), but please recall that when Prince Harold deserts Kahlan, Kahlan threatens to throw Cyrilla back into the dungeon to be raped by all the criminals again. So she's not as pristine as that little white dress of hers would indicate.

Does Richard ever admit to being wrong? I can't recall. I only remember in Naked Empire when he claimed that his use of violence in the past has not only been morally justified, but the only moral thing to do. Interesting.

Good to see you here though, it's nice to have an opposing viewpoint that isn't that troll mystar. Welcome.

[DrownedCrow]

When Richard kicked Violet, Denna had already taken the Agiel away from her, and Richard understands at that point that it is Denna, not the Queen or Violet that has the power there. Violet was no threat to Richard, and despite Violet's spoken threats about Kahlan, Richard believed that she was far from Violet's grasp, and therefor safe. So why kick Violet except out of spite? And as for Violet's "choice"? She's what? nine? ten? She was being raised by a bitch, to be a monster. Not totally her choice.

I'm going to have to agree with TG here. Richard was trying to kill Violet, right? If he had killed her, he could potentially spare her kingdom from suffering under her future rule. If you could travel back in time and give 10 year old Hitler a righteous kick of justice to the face, wouldn't you do it?

[Moosicus]

I'm going to have to agree with TG here. Richard was trying to kill Violet, right? If he had killed her, he could potentially spare her kingdom from suffering under her future rule. If you could travel back in time and give 10 year old Hitler a righteous kick of justice to the face, wouldn't you do it?

If that was his motivation, then sure. But its not. Violet tortures him for a bit, Denna takes away the Agiel, Violet tells Richard about all the horrible things she's going to have done to Kahlan, then sticks her tongue at him. Then he kicks her. I'll check the chapter later on, but I don't recall Richard ever thinking that she might grow up to be a terrible tyrant yadda yadda. AFAICT his motivation is purely based on his feelings for Kahlan, who is in no danger from Violet.

[avenger12]

"Yes, the blacksmith was a hot big breasted woman. As were some, of his other business contacts. Not to mention all the other people in the Old World that Richard impacted"

Since I haven't actually read the books and I was just commenting on the many quotes I've read here, my knowledge of the The Sword of Truth series is somewhat limited. If there are other people who have been converted, then my uage of the word "all" was a bit premature. Still, it does seem that "all" the prominent figures that have found redemption are big breated women who get a kick out of killing people.

"I'm going to have to agree with TG here. Richard was trying to kill Violet, right? If he had killed her, he could potentially spare her kingdom from suffering under her future rule. If you could travel back in time and give 10 year old Hitler a righteous kick of justice to the face, wouldn't you do it?"

This begs the question, can we really hold people accountable for actions they haven't commited yet? Does it really have to go down like that? Sure, if I could, I would prevent Hitler from becoming the power that he was. Still, couldn't I formulate another method of removing the ability for a young Hitler to gain power that doesn't involve me kicking him in the face when he's only 10-years-old?

[Moosicus]

This begs the question, can we really hold people accountable for actions they haven't commited yet? Does it really have to go down like that? Sure, if I could, I would prevent Hitler from becoming the power that he was. Still, couldn't I formulate another method of removing the ability for a young Hitler to gain power that doesn't involve me kicking him in the face when he's only 10-years-old?

Exactly, you can't execute a child based on what it might do someday. If Richard was motivated by the good of the kingdom, why not make a lunge at the Queen? She was the one in power (under Darken Rahl, ultimately), without her the land would be in the hands of some regency or council who may not have been so sadistic. As long as we're playing the "what if" game.

Why do things have to suddenly get really interesting just minutes before I have to go to work? See you all tomorrow.

[Fanatic-Templar]

I finally figured out what the Agiel reminded me of! In StarGate SG-1 the goa'uld have these pain-inflicting rods that cause the recipient to have light coming out of their mouth and eyes. Not accusing Goodkind of stealing it, of course, merely happy I've found the similarity.

[Knight of the Wineskin]

But then we have Richard, Warren, Lyle, Rachel, Harold, Tom...and they are all from different nations? I'm not an expert on cultures or "name-y-ology", but shouldn't there at least be a consistency from locale to locale?

I don't know if this is a huge point or not, but I think Yeardi has some naming conventions with the Mud People (and maybe other cultures), but then gets all half-assed with others, and seems to just pick common and "made up" names at other times. Again, a small point against him being a good author/thinker.

Silly Vigo, logic and internal consistency is for fantasy novels! Terry doesn't care about building a world or not contradicting himself!

[TheVatican]

~The Vatican,

Victor and the others in the old world that were part of the uprising were never actively (to the best of our knowledge) on the side of evil, so the size of their boobs is irrelevant.

No it is not irrelevant. The claim was this, "Then again, I've noticed a similarity between all the people that have found redemption. All of them are hot, big breasted females that want to bang Richard. So, if Richard doesn't find you attractive and you're working on the side of "evil", especially if you're under the age of 12, I guess you're screwed."

The claim was that ALL of the people saved by Richard were women with Big Breasts, my point was that is a riduculous statement one that can easily be proven to be false. That in making clever general statements, one must be careful, because they could be wrong, and will allow others to effectively prove it wrong. Not to mention take a few cheap shots, like this, per me, "To answer your first question, there is another statue being built in the Old World. It is being built by Richards converted women with big breasts."

As for self defense, what threat was Gadi when Kahlan ordered him to be tortured by Cara all night long? None, she had him tortured purely out of spite because he'd knifed Warren.

Yes, and as we all know this guy had a chance to be saved and refused to take Richards offer, and continued to behave in a barbaric manner, not to mentioned sentenced the man who brought him salvation to death by reporting him to the gestapo. He was about to kill a little girl, Holly I believe, but was saved by Warren. Not to mention that at this time the odds of the New Worlders standing up to the might of the IO was nill. They were doomed people, but continued to fight because of their dedication to freedom. The fact that they took some tactics that might be seen as barbaric to us, is beside the point. Part of the reason for the all night torture is for morale, Kahlan emphasized that she wanted the camp to hear the enemies pain. We may think this to be unmoral, however, it was an act that as far as we knw helped her camps moral. We are dealin with soldiers who have lost their homes and a good friend. Remember, all the man liked Warren because they saw him as the Nerdy little brother, that gave them hope that they may as well find a woman like Warren did. A nerdyness that was intimated all of the soldiers at some level had within themselves. To them, to painfully extract their revenge was a moral booster. They know, that if they at some point fall to the IO, they will be avenged, their death will not be the end of them, they matter, their beliefs will continue to go on because they have a kick ass leader, that even when the odds are stacked against them, will continue to fight for their cause. A leader that will not give up and say that it's no use, let's ask for surrender terms. Terms, that they know will likely mean their death, rape of their women and if not, an existance that is worse than death.

If the New World Army disagreed with Kahlan, then they would have left her and proceeded on their own. but they did not, they loved her for her hardness and commitment to fight the IO. They continued to fight with her as their battle leader. these are a hard people that know what is at stake, and they know they need strong leaders that will do things to help them win a fight that non of them wanted to be involved in, but that they realize they must win or be doomed.

Demmin Nass, though a cruel pedophile and a murderer who was in charge of the quads who killed all the other Confessors, had been taken by Kahlan's power already. Punishing him by making him sever and subsequently eat his own testicles was pointless, who he had been was already destroyed. He was no longer a threat to anybody, and never would be.

Again, he had what was coming to him, he abandoned his humanity, by being a murderous thug. What else should they have done with him. Allowed him to be a constant reminder to Kahlan of his acts against her sisters? The fact she extracted some revenge for herself is irrelevant, he needed to die. Let be another example of what happens to those who behave like animals. if you behanve like an animal, your will be dealt like an animal. He choose his path.

When Richard kicked Violet, Denna had already taken the Agiel away from her, and Richard understands at that point that it is Denna, not the Queen or Violet that has the power there. Violet was no threat to Richard, and despite Violet's spoken threats about Kahlan, Richard believed that she was far from Violet's grasp, and therefor safe. So why kick Violet except out of spite? And as for Violet's "choice"? She's what? nine? ten? She was being raised by a bitch, to be a monster. Not totally her choice.

That may be true, however, if he would not have incapacitated her, she would have continued to come back. Just because she may have stopped that day, did not mean she would not come back the next. The fact that the package comes in a young package, does not give her any immunity to her behavior. Remember, there were times in our past, where a man was considered a man at ages of 10 and on. Where they were expected to run the family business, much like some of our founding fathers. The fact, that we expect nothing of our youth till the age of 18, is irrelevant, the capacity is there for humans to learn the value of life.

As for who lets people live and die, and who does the raping, you're right. Richard's side has not been committing any rapes that we're aware of (though I wonder what his forces will really be up to while in the Old World),

it is quite clear in phantoms that the D'Harans are letting the innocent leave unharmed with warinings that if they take actions against them, they will be seen as part of the IO.

but please recall that when Prince Harold deserts Kahlan, Kahlan threatens to throw Cyrilla back into the dungeon to be raped by all the criminals again. So she's not as pristine as that little white dress of hers would indicate.

Of course she is not pristine, she is a war leader fighting a vicious enemy that will not be easy on them and their populous. Part of her threat to Cyrilla was said in anger for a betrayal. Again, the characters are flawed and do not act perfectly all the time, however, I cannot blame Kahalan. Cyrilla is effectively sentencing all Galea to a treatment that Cyrilla herself is sentencing herself too.

Cyrilla will be thrown into that same cell or the same effect, by the IO, therfore, Kahlan's act will only be what Cyrilla already willing sentenced herself to. Cyrillas choice in this case, will result in the same treatment. Perhaps this threat will make her change her mind and a harsh word will work when civil discourse and diplomacy has failed. This was Kahlan's last desperate act to save Galea from the terrible fate that befell them, and it was because of Cyrilla. Not everyone is moved with civil behavior, in this case, the New World (Kahlan) gave Cyrilla all the civil behaviour in the world, including the crown of Galea. And what did Cyrilla do with such civil and moral behavior? that's right, condem her populace. Perhaps a threat will make her react in a way that will save her people. Kahlan is doing what she must to save the New World, if that means doing things she would normally hy away from, then so be it. it is fight for freedom and survival.

Perhaps, England's Chamberlain was right when he dealt with Hitler, we should have tried to appease Hitler. The fact that we had to defeat Hitler using bombs and conventional warfare, which probably resulted in the death of some innocents, does not make the acts of the Allies, evil or immoral, they were drawn into a war that they not want, but if they must they will end it with them surviving. Much like what the New World and Kahlan finds herself in.

Does Richard ever admit to being wrong? I can't recall. I only remember in Naked Empire when he claimed that his use of violence in the past has not only been morally justified, but the only moral thing to do. Interesting.

I have only read the series twice and cannot remember all of the points where richard has shown that he is wrong, but here are a few that show him accepted and knowing his faults. In phantoms, Richards states that in fighting Jagang directly he was wrong, that this commited the efforts of the New World for a few years into a loosing fight and therefore, a waste of time and resources. That hey should have not reacted the way that Jagang wanted him to react, but to fight the war in a manner in which he would destroy the IO. And, there is a lot of hope at the end of Phantoms that the New World has alot of good things going for him, such at this, "

per me, My contention is that eventhough it looks Grim for the good guys, there is a lot of evidence that the tide has begun to turn in favor of Richard.

1) the logistically problem that Jagang has on his hands now that his supply trains have been cut off. The books mentions that the train we saw coming into his camp, would be the last. The effect on his army is obvious. They will starve and be ill equipt to survive a siege in a desert. Not to mention that they will need material to build their ramp, and since they are in a desert, this will be difficult for them.

2) Since the main army is not equipt, all their occupying forces in the New World will suffer, as we see from Queen Six's land, the army there got supplies last and they were needing them. Also, they sent the majority of their army to join the main force. What this means, is that the occupying forces in the New World will be alone, small and starving, once the New Worlders fight for their territory.

3) Since word is spreading in Jagangs Army of the attacks on the Old World, rumors have begun in his army. Jagang has killed them, however, this is something htat is not easily stamped out. Especially once his army begins to fear the grip of hunger.

4) Nathan's future destruction of the ramp. It is mentioned that he is waiting to detroy it to allow for them to invest more time and thought into that project. If this idea proceeds as expected by the good guys. Then the destruction of the ramp will serve as a major moral buster for the IO. It will mean the destruction of a lot of their materail, which they are in short supply, plus of the idea that their victory is near. it will further add to the complications of hunger and their homes being attacked.

Now I fully understand, that Nathan's idea could backfire on him, TG could make it so that Nathan is not able to destroy the ramp. Though, even then, Jagang is using material to build the ramp, that he may need or does not have, considering that his supply trains are cut.

5) Kahlan and Richards proximity to Jagang, it may be bad, however, it does allow Richard and Kahlan to be near the leader of the IO. Granted, the death of Jagang, may not mean that that will end the destruction of the IO, however, in the shortrun, it will mean the IO will be disorganized, which will allow a focused army, such as the D'harans to destroy them and weaken them. Plus, with the revolts and the Old World being awakaned to the idea of freedom, the IO can effectively be destroyed.

6) Jagang mentions several times that the number of gifted he has is become much much less. We also have not seen such a drastic loss of gifted from the D'harans, though outnumbered from the beginning, they were able to counter the IO's gifted, therefore, if the IO is loosing their gifted, the New Worlders might be able to get an advantage in firepower over the IO because there are less of the IO to counter and hence can be used to go offensive.

Also, Richard is constantly telling his general's that he will accept their advise and ideas, because he knows he is lacking in this area, and that he will not hurt them for their ideas.

Richard admitted he was wrong about the eating of meat, that just because he had to kill people, does not mean he is offsetting the balance of his magic, that sometimes it is moral and ok to kill those that are threatning you for no reason, other than your beliefs.

that is all I can think about right now. But though, I have seen Richard as being the protagonist, he is not written to be the perfect character, he is flawed and has made mistakes, of which the story reveals by Richars constant introspection of himself.

Good to see you here though, it's nice to have an opposing viewpoint that isn't that troll mystar. Welcome.

I have been posting about a song of fire and ice for a bit, and recently read the view a lot of peeps here have about TG. I felt I would attempt to enter the foray

Thanks for invite. Hoping to have some civil debates.

[Gylfie]

TheVatican, I'm not sure this is the place for civil debates, but one can hope. Some of us just find tons of pleasure in mocking what we see as rediculous hackish fantasy containing terrible politics.

I do find it funny, however, that so many children have to be killed by the "heros" of the story. Even if (and that's a HUGE if) each one of these killings and maimings of children are "just" isn't it weird that there are so many of them?

And how can the Chicken of Evil be defended?

Now, about these magical boobs, I think it's important to have more in-depth investigations into them. I will admit to having been enchanted by a nice pair before, but I'm not sure if they were actually magical.

[TheVatican]

TheVatican, I'm not sure this is the place for civil debates, but one can hope. Some of us just find tons of pleasure in mocking what we see as rediculous hackish fantasy containing terrible politics.

I do find it funny, however, that so many children have to be killed by the "heros" of the story. Even if (and that's a HUGE if) each one of these killings and maimings of children are "just" isn't it weird that there are so many of them?

And how can the Chicken of Evil be defended?

Now, about these magical boobs, I think it's important to have more in-depth investigations into them. I will admit to having been enchanted by a nice pair before, but I'm not sure if they were actually magical.

I think it is more realistic. I think that in true warfare, children are casualties of war. i have always found his writings on that particular topic more realistic. Not to mention that I quite enjoy TG's chapters on the Hack and slash. I think that of all the writers of have read, he does a very good job and they are entertaining.

I also enjoy the Objectivist philosophy and realistic view of Communism that is found in the book.

[Baeraad]

that is all I can think about right now. But though, I have seen Richard as being the protagonist, he is not written to be the perfect character, he is flawed and has made mistakes, of which the story reveals by Richars constant introspection of himself.

May I point out that both of the mistakes you mentioned - not eating meat, fighting the IO - boils down to Richard not realising how perfect he is? He was wrong not to eat meat, because that's like saying he's not right to kill people. He was wrong to try to lead the New World against the IO, because the New Worlders don't deserve to fight for him until they fully understand the utter righteousness of his cause.

So basically, Richard's mistakes consist of thinking he's less wonderful than he really is?

[Lightsnake]

As for self defense, what threat was Gadi when Kahlan ordered him to be tortured by Cara all night long? None, she had him tortured purely out of spite because he'd knifed Warren.

Yes, and as we all know this guy had a chance to be saved and refused to take Richards offer, and continued to behave in a barbaric manner, not to mentioned sentenced the man who brought him salvation to death by reporting him to the gestapo. He was about to kill a little girl, Holly I believe, but was saved by Warren. Not to mention that at this time the odds of the New Worlders standing up to the might of the IO was nill. They were doomed people, but continued to fight because of their dedication to freedom. The fact that they took some tactics that might be seen as barbaric to us, is beside the point. Part of the reason for the all night torture is for morale, Kahlan emphasized that she wanted the camp to hear the enemies pain. We may think this to be unmoral, however, it was an act that as far as we knw helped her camps moral. We are dealin with soldiers who have lost their homes and a good friend. Remember, all the man liked Warren because they saw him as the Nerdy little brother, that gave them hope that they may as well find a woman like Warren did. A nerdyness that was intimated all of the soldiers at some level had within themselves. To them, to painfully extract their revenge was a moral booster. They know, that if they at some point fall to the IO, they will be avenged, their death will not be the end of them, they matter, their beliefs will continue to go on because they have a kick ass leader, that even when the odds are stacked against them, will continue to fight for their cause. A leader that will not give up and say that it's no use, let's ask for surrender terms. Terms, that they know will likely mean their death, rape of their women and if not, an existance that is worse than death.

So? It's called WAR. You kill your enemy. You don't torture them slowly and horribly. What self defense was there? A throat cutting would've been sufficient. It was necessary to torture a guy to death for MORALE? Seriously now...I'm sorry, but most men should frankly desert when a military prisoner is tortured throughout the night to death

If the New World Army disagreed with Kahlan, then they would have left her and proceeded on their own. but they did not, they loved her for her hardness and commitment to fight the IO. They continued to fight with her as their battle leader. these are a hard people that know what is at stake, and they know they need strong leaders that will do things to help them win a fight that non of them wanted to be involved in, but that they realize they must win or be doomed.

Demmin Nass, though a cruel pedophile and a murderer who was in charge of the quads who killed all the other Confessors, had been taken by Kahlan's power already. Punishing him by making him sever and subsequently eat his own testicles was pointless, who he had been was already destroyed. He was no longer a threat to anybody, and never would be.

Again, he had what was coming to him, he abandoned his humanity, by being a murderous thug. What else should they have done with him. Allowed him to be a constant reminder to Kahlan of his acts against her sisters? The fact she extracted some revenge for herself is irrelevant, he needed to die. Let be another example of what happens to those who behave like animals. if you behanve like an animal, your will be dealt like an animal. He choose his path.

Really? Where's the evidence of Demmin doing anything? Demmin was DEAD the second she used her power on him. He was no longer the same person, he was gone! He didn't ';need to die' because he was replaced with a fawning, selfless devotion to Kahlan. How did the new person he'd become deserve to die?

When Richard kicked Violet, Denna had already taken the Agiel away from her, and Richard understands at that point that it is Denna, not the Queen or Violet that has the power there. Violet was no threat to Richard, and despite Violet's spoken threats about Kahlan, Richard believed that she was far from Violet's grasp, and therefor safe. So why kick Violet except out of spite? And as for Violet's "choice"? She's what? nine? ten? She was being raised by a bitch, to be a monster. Not totally her choice.

That may be true, however, if he would not have incapacitated her, she would have continued to come back. Just because she may have stopped that day, did not mean she would not come back the next. The fact that the package comes in a young package, does not give her any immunity to her behavior. Remember, there were times in our past, where a man was considered a man at ages of 10 and on. Where they were expected to run the family business, much like some of our founding fathers. The fact, that we expect nothing of our youth till the age of 18, is irrelevant, the capacity is there for humans to learn the value of life.

Yeah, Violet was called a child several times. Doing that to her meant nothing. In the end, Milena would've been removed by the, y'know, mother Confessor. Why did Richard have any right to nearly kill a CHILD? One who was no longer in a position to hurt him?

As for who lets people live and die, and who does the raping, you're right. Richard's side has not been committing any rapes that we're aware of (though I wonder what his forces will really be up to while in the Old World),

it is quite clear in phantoms that the D'Harans are letting the innocent leave unharmed with warinings that if they take actions against them, they will be seen as part of the IO.

but please recall that when Prince Harold deserts Kahlan, Kahlan threatens to throw Cyrilla back into the dungeon to be raped by all the criminals again. So she's not as pristine as that little white dress of hers would indicate.

Of course she is not pristine, she is a war leader fighting a vicious enemy that will not be easy on them and their populous. Part of her threat to Cyrilla was said in anger for a betrayal. Again, the characters are flawed and do not act perfectly all the time, however, I cannot blame Kahalan. Cyrilla is effectively sentencing all Galea to a treatment that Cyrilla herself is sentencing herself too.

Cyrilla will be thrown into that same cell or the same effect, by the IO, therfore, Kahlan's act will only be what Cyrilla already willing sentenced herself to. Cyrillas choice in this case, will result in the same treatment. Perhaps this threat will make her change her mind and a harsh word will work when civil discourse and diplomacy has failed. This was Kahlan's last desperate act to save Galea from the terrible fate that befell them, and it was because of Cyrilla. Not everyone is moved with civil behavior, in this case, the New World (Kahlan) gave Cyrilla all the civil behaviour in the world, including the crown of Galea. And what did Cyrilla do with such civil and moral behavior? that's right, condem her populace. Perhaps a threat will make her react in a way that will save her people. Kahlan is doing what she must to save the New World, if that means doing things she would normally hy away from, then so be it. it is fight for freedom and survival.

Sorry, but just try to justify this: Kahlan is never portrayed as anything but 'teh perfect woman' or a psychotic dictator killer, usually both. Cyrilla had 'sentenced' herself to it, so it's ok for Kahlan to threaten to have her raped till death? I'm sorry, but do you just not see that statements like that will just make things worse? And then killing Harold? Any ruler worth her salt would ally with the IO then...oh, and Kahlan threatened to destroy Galea, remember? And it's not much a threat if you KILL THE GUY WHO WOULD SEND THE MESSAGE BACK. Oh, and Cyrilla is mentally ill, remember? She trusted Kahlan who was sweet enough to, y'know, wreck the sovereignty of the land. Last I checked, no Galean soldier got any message back to Cyrilla because they killed Harold. You really trying to justify this?

Perhaps, England's Chamberlain was right when he dealt with Hitler, we should have tried to appease Hitler. The fact that we had to defeat Hitler using bombs and conventional warfare, which probably resulted in the death of some innocents, does not make the acts of the Allies, evil or immoral, they were drawn into a war that they not want, but iquote]f they must they will end it with them surviving. Much like what the New World and Kahlan finds herself in.

I don't recall Churchhill roaring "Kill anyong who support fascism and return with their ears!

Does Richard ever admit to being wrong? I can't recall. I only remember in Naked Empire when he claimed that his use of violence in the past has not only been morally justified, but the only moral thing to do. Interesting.

I have only read the series twice and cannot remember all of the points where richard has shown that he is wrong, but here are a few that show him accepted and knowing his faults. In phantoms, Richards states that in fighting Jagang directly he was wrong, that this commited the efforts of the New World for a few years into a loosing fight and therefore, a waste of time and resources. That hey should have not reacted the way that Jagang wanted him to react, but to fight the war in a manner in which he would destroy the IO. And, there is a lot of hope at the end of Phantoms that the New World has alot of good things going for him, such at this,

In other words, nothing major at all. In fact, as Richard clearly realizes: He's right. People just didn't value freedon, remember?

per me, My contention is that eventhough it looks Grim for the good guys, there is a lot of evidence that the tide has begun to turn in favor of Richard.

1) the logistically problem that Jagang has on his hands now that his supply trains have been cut off. The books mentions that the train we saw coming into his camp, would be the last. The effect on his army is obvious. They will starve and be ill equipt to survive a siege in a desert. Not to mention that they will need material to build their ramp, and since they are in a desert, this will be difficult for them.

Once again: The army is a well supplied and occupied one...are there no supplies in the New World? Richard's letting him have it unopposed.

2) Since the main army is not equipt, all their occupying forces in the New World will suffer, as we see from Queen Six's land, the army there got supplies last and they were needing them. Also, they sent the majority of their army to join the main force. What this means, is that the occupying forces in the New World will be alone, small and starving, once the New Worlders fight for their territory

Except for the fields and supplies the New World would presumably have? When you're occupying, it's hard to cut off lines.

3) Since word is spreading in Jagangs Army of the attacks on the Old World, rumors have begun in his army. Jagang has killed them, however, this is something htat is not easily stamped out. Especially once his army begins to fear the grip of hunger.

Except Jagang must have some supply lines to wage a war and run a friggin' empire...this is Terry having no idea how real wars would be waged, too.

4) Nathan's future destruction of the ramp. It is mentioned that he is waiting to detroy it to allow for them to invest more time and thought into that project. If this idea proceeds as expected by the good guys. Then the destruction of the ramp will serve as a major moral buster for the IO. It will mean the destruction of a lot of their materail, which they are in short supply, plus of the idea that their victory is near. it will further add to the complications of hunger and their homes being attacked.

Now I fully understand, that Nathan's idea could backfire on him, TG could make it so that Nathan is not able to destroy the ramp. Though, even then, Jagang is using material to build the ramp, that he may need or does not have, considering that his supply trains are cut.

Once again: Richard's army is woefully inadequate and there've been massive strings of victory from the IO...losing a ramp won't hurt them any more than losing Milletus did for the Greeks.

5) Kahlan and Richards proximity to Jagang, it may be bad, however, it does allow Richard and Kahlan to be near the leader of the IO. Granted, the death of Jagang, may not mean that that will end the destruction of the IO, however, in the shortrun, it will mean the IO will be disorganized, which will allow a focused army, such as the D'harans to destroy them and weaken them. Plus, with the revolts and the Old World being awakaned to the idea of freedom, the IO can effectively be destroyed.

Oh, freedom now? How? By destroying and burning their towns? To civilians who aren't part of the war, turning their homes into infernos will strengthen Jagang's position and give him a real propaganda machine. Richard wasn't content to leave well enough alone, either..."Bring back trophies from their corpses and all who support the idea of working towards a common good be slaughtered!

6) Jagang mentions several times that the number of gifted he has is become much much less. We also have not seen such a drastic loss of gifted from the D'harans, though outnumbered from the beginning, they were able to counter the IO's gifted, therefore, if the IO is loosing their gifted, the New Worlders might be able to get an advantage in firepower over the IO because there are less of the IO to counter and hence can be used to go offensive.

In other words- Cheap plot device from Terry. Again.

Also, Richard is constantly telling his general's that he will accept their advise and ideas, because he knows he is lacking in this area, and that he will not hurt them for their ideas.

In between where he crushes so-called 'primitive' beliefs and hurls his own values into the diatribe? In between when he abandons his own army?

Richard admitted he was wrong about the eating of meat, that just because he had to kill people, does not mean he is offsetting the balance of his magic, that sometimes it is moral and ok to kill those that are threatning you for no reason, other than your beliefs.

How often does Richard really do this justly? Richard brutalizes kids and it never once register any guilt. He commits numerous wartime atrocities too. Kahlan's even worse.

that is all I can think about right now. But though, I have seen Richard as being the protagonist, he is not written to be the perfect character, he is flawed and has made mistakes, of which the story reveals by Richars constant introspection of himself.

False. Goodkind olds Richard to the idealistic view of humanity and has stated Richard is his alter-ego.

[Gylfie]

I think it is more realistic. I think that in true warfare, children are casualties of war. i have always found his writings on that particular topic more realistic. Not to mention that I quite enjoy TG's chapters on the Hack and slash. I think that of all the writers of have read, he does a very good job and they are entertaining.

I also enjoy the Objectivist philosophy and realistic view of Communism that is found in the book.

I don't find the "children die in war" argument to be a valid one. Children do die, but almost every society views it as an atrocity, especially to specifically target children. To have "heros" killing children directly (not as "collateral damage") is retarded when we are supposed to view these heros as moral individuals.

I also find the Objectivist philosophy to be a particularly masturbatory brand of libertarianism.

[Watcher]

TheVatican

Welcome to the debate. Not many people would try to defend Goodkind on this board. I respect you trying to do so. As an bonus its nice to have someone that isn’t a troll trying.

Now to attack your arguments ïŠ

Your first several rebuttals can be summed up as “They got what they deserved and Richard and Kahlan had no choice.†This doesn’t make Richard and company good, it just means they are a little bit less evil then the people they are fighting.

I think this shows that Goodkind is lazy. Instead of building protagonist that do have a strong moral foundation, he makes the enemy as vicious and mean as possible. Then he contrast Richard’s and Kahlan’s actions against the backdrop of truly deprived people. They will seem to be good no matter what. But I strongly believe that the end doesn’t justify the means. There has to be more of a difference between the good guys and bad guys then simply they are not us.

For your defense of the torture of the assassin I cannot more strongly and thoroughly disagree with you. Using torture to build morale as something the IO does. A nation that Goodkind repeatedly describes as evil. How is Kahlan using the same tactics not evil? Why is it okay for her to do it to build morale, and not the IO?

Of course she is not pristine, she is a war leader fighting a vicious enemy that will not be easy on them and their populous. Part of her threat to Cyrilla was said in anger for a betrayal. Again, the characters are flawed and do not act perfectly all the time, however, I cannot blame Kahalan. Cyrilla is effectively sentencing all Galea to a treatment that Cyrilla herself is sentencing herself too.

Cyrilla will be thrown into that same cell or the same effect, by the IO, therfore, Kahlan's act will only be what Cyrilla already willing sentenced herself to. Cyrillas choice in this case, will result in the same treatment. Perhaps this threat will make her change her mind and a harsh word will work when civil discourse and diplomacy has failed. This was Kahlan's last desperate act to save Galea from the terrible fate that befell them, and it was because of Cyrilla. Not everyone is moved with civil behavior, in this case, the New World (Kahlan) gave Cyrilla all the civil behaviour in the world, including the crown of Galea. And what did Cyrilla do with such civil and moral behavior? that's right, condem her populace. Perhaps a threat will make her react in a way that will save her people. Kahlan is doing what she must to save the New World, if that means doing things she would normally hy away from, then so be it. it is fight for freedom and survival.

But Kahlan never give her the chance to change her mind because she order the executation of Prince William (?) before he could deliver her ultimate. Using “she’s going to end up in the cell anyways†is not a moral defense. Everyone is going to die sometime, does that mean I can kill whenever I want because hey you’re going to die?

I can blame Kahalan. She preaches freedom and that people should be able to make their own choices. But when confronted with a choice she disagrees with she time and again choices to have the offender killed.

I can also blame her because she didn’t try diplomacy. The IO is the real enemy. Not Cyrilla’s kingdom. But once she was stymied by Cyrilla she treated them as if they were no different then the IO. An alternative would be try to talk to other nobles in that kingdom. They might be able to bring Cyrilla around. Prince William explained that Cyrilla was terrified of the IO. Kahlan could’ve played on those fears to manipulate Cyrilla to take the path she wanted. Not saying that would work, but attacking an ally when you have a bigger threat is counter-productive.

Richard’s battle plan against the IO goes against all logic and history of war. I cannot think of when his tactic worked. A successful guerilla campaign has to have a willing public to support it. Two other glaring defects, Richard’s army will have the same logistics problem as the IO, no supplies or reenforcements. The other is who is stopping the IO from doing to the Midlands exactly what Richard’s army is doing in the IO homelands? Richard disbanded his entire army. Why isn’t the IO simply marching (and raping) at will?

[The Wolf Maid]

Wow. I'm gone for a few hours, and I missed all the action.

I used to think Kahlan was the saner of the two, but I take that back. She has been infected with the Richard virus.

I think it is more realistic. I think that in true warfare, children are casualties of war. i have always found his writings on that particular topic more realistic. Not to mention that I quite enjoy TG's chapters on the Hack and slash. I think that of all the writers of have read, he does a very good job and they are entertaining.

I also enjoy the Objectivist philosophy and realistic view of Communism that is found in the book.

Yes, childrens are casualties of war, but generally, people try to save them or understand them rather than kill them or kick their jaws in.

[Zap Rowsdower]

This parody was inspired by this previous quote of the day. I dedicate this parody to the Mad Moose for all of his valient efforts to warn unwary readers about the dangers of Goodkindism.

Sorry if it is a little rough around the edges, but I didn't realize it was going be so darn long and I was too lazy to give it anything more than a brief onceover to check it for mistakes. For those of you who have not tried it, writing about Goodkind's characters is just as painful as reading about them.

Without further delay, I give you Moral Celery Battle!

The room is dark. The only light came from a few torches placed at regular intervals. The flame light outlines vague, uneven shapes but the shadows cluster too thickly to make out any detail. It is an atmosphere of total stillness and silence. A light- from whence it came, no one knew- begins to brighten the enclosure. The shadows battle briefly and then flee into full scale retreat.

It is an arena. But could men have built such a thing? Surely not, surely this must be the domain of the Gods! Smooth planes of stainless steel glitter with mirrored perfection. Rows upon rows of tables, littered with curiously shaped implements dot the landscape. Between the tables and ovens stands a battalion of men. Clad in the purest of white, they stand at rigid attention.

A man, thin, and saturnine surveys the scene. In contrast to the austere exactness of the arena, the man is dressed…flamboyantly. A black cape, with a cream colored inner lining is thrown casually over one shoulder. He wears a Mao suit, sprinkled liberally with rhinestones and a choice assortment of glitter.

The man’s gaze shifts to a basket filled with peppers. With an elegantly gloved hand, he selects a yellow pepper. He raises the pepper to his mouth and takes a bite…

“Tell me what you eat and I will tell you what you are.†Brillat-Savarin

Nearly a decade ago, a man's fantasy became reality in a form never seen before, Kitchen Stadium, a giant cooking arena. The motivation for spending his fortune to create kitchen stadium was to encounter new, original cuisine, which could be called true, artistic creations. To realize his dream, he started choosing the top chefs of various styles of cooking, and he named his men the Iron Chefs, the invincible men of culinary skill. Iron Chef Japanese is Masaharu Morimoto, Iron Chef French is Hiroyuki Sakai, Iron Chef Chinese is Chen Kenichi, and Masahiko Kobe is Iron Chef Italian. Kitchen stadium is the arena where Iron Chefs await the challenges of master chefs from all over the world. Both the Iron Chef and challenger have one hour to tackle the theme ingredient of the day. Using all their senses, skills, creativity, they're to prepare artistic dishes never tasted before. And if ever a challenger wins over the Iron Chefs, He or she will gain the people's ovation, and fame forever. Every battle, reputations are on the line in Kitchen Stadium, where master chefs pit their artistic creations against each other. What inspiration will today's challenger bring, and how will the Iron Chefs fight back? The heat will be on!

Announcer 1: Good evening folks! We’ve got an exciting show for you tonight! The challenger is Chef Richard Rahl, owner and head chef at the D’Haran’s People’s Food Court.

Announcer 2: Richard Rahl’s restaurant received an impressive 19 on the Gault Millau scale. Rumor has it that Chef Rahl was so angered at not receiving a 20 out of 20 he tracked down every food critic in the tri-county area and had them summarily beheaded.

Announcer 1: Haha! That story is of course apocryphal. I have it on good authority that he first had his wife Kahlan force them to cut off and eat their testicles before they were executed. As we all know, Chef Rahl is know far and wide for his moral clarity and thus would never execute someone summarily.

Announcer 2: Haha, yes, speaking of moral clarity, Chef Rahl has made himself famous in the culinary world for his meals focused on promoting objectivist philosophy and a “no mercy†approach to food preparation.

Cut to a video clip of chef Rahl, speaking into a microphone at an interview in his restaurant’s kitchen.

“I have always liked to say that my foods will purge you of your collectivist impulses faster than prune juice will purge you of crap. On countless occasions, after tasting my flambé ala Rand, my customers have told me that all their charity and compassion shriveled up and died.â€

Video clip ends

Announcer 1: Making Chef Rahl’s story even more dramatic is the fact that he changed the entire focus of his restaurant in the middle of the season. Before, Chef Rahl’s Food Court was focused entirely on vegetarian cuisine. Then just recently he announced he would focus his efforts on producing only meatbased food.

Announcer 2: As I understand it, many of his customers were angry and confused over Chef Rahl’s abrupt about-face.

Announcer 1: Yeah, Chef Rahl had them all put to death. He saved the corpses and is planning a cannibal extravaganza when he reopens the Food Court this spring. He is going to unveil a whole slew of exotic dishes he learned while studying the culinary arts among the Mud People.

Announcer 2: Wow, that should be some treat! I’m going to be placing my reservation now!

Announcer 1: Haha, nice try, but Chef Rahl’s restaurant doesn’t accept reservations. Seats in his restaurant are awarded only to be people who can demonstrate their moral clarity. I’ve driven past the Food Court on numerous times, and let me tell you, it ain’t pretty. Pandemonium left and right, people kicking in jaws and slitting throats just to get a seat in Chef Rahl’s Food Court. It looks like a scene straight out of a George Romero movie.

Announcer 2: Haha, talk about survival of the fittest. Oh, I think Chef Rahl is here now!

The doors to kitchen stadium were thrown open and a gaggle of Agiel wielding Mord-Sith flounced into the arena. Announcers, guests, assistant chefs, and even Chairman Kaga himself strained to catch a glimpse of Chef Rahl. But it was no use, though their eyes flew all about, they could not see Chef Rahl among his Mord-Sith, despite the fact Chef Rahl was reputedly a big man.

The party of dominatrixes halted before Kaga’s dais and suddenly parted. The crowd began to mutter in confusion when they saw nothing. But then the crowd gasped. The air itself seem to part and revealed the imposing form of Chef Rahl.

Dressed from head to foot in his black leather form hugging war chef outfit, Richard cut a masculine figure. Covered in buckles and zippers, the outfit shone with the twin glisten of glossy leather and polished metal. Years of sampling his own objectivist ambrosia had left Richard with an ample gut. His excess weight combined with his leather outfit was making Richard perspire profusely. Ropes of sweat crawled down his cheeks and forehead and beaded on his upper lip. His broad face had a florid complexion which would darken to a deep purple on the frequent occasions when he lost his temper.

Richard surveyed the arena with his raptor like gaze, and hooked his thumbs between his belt while gritting his teeth.

Announcer 1: Wow, that was some entrance.

Announcer 2: Haha, yes. I’ve been at Kitchen Stadium for years and that was the most dramatic- ah! It looks like Chef Rahl is about to choose an Iron Chef!

Chairman Kaga gestured with his hands and a section of the floor slide open to reveal a large pit. As they all watched a large platform began to rise from the pit. Standing atop the platform were several men in different colored outfits.

Richard’s eye’s widened when he saw the man on the end of the platform.

“Jagang!†Richard hissed between his teeth.

Announcer 1: It looks like Chef Rahl has just discovered the Chairman’s surprise!

Announcer 2: To really heat things up for today’s competition, Chairman Kaga made Jagang and honorary iron chef.

Announcer 1: And Chef Ralh has just thrown down the gauntlet to Iron Chef Jagang! This will be a battle of Titans!

Announcer 2: Not just a battle of food, but a battle of Philosophy!

Announcer 1: In contrast to Chef Rahl, Chef Jagang is a master of Collectivist Cuisine. During the course of his career, Chef Jagang has studied cooking at the sides of Fidel Castro, Kim Jong Il, and Chea Guevera.

Announcer 2: In addition to his formal cooking instruction, Jagang was able to unearth ten tomes of Stalin’s secret recipes, among them the much celebrated 1001 Ways to Cook Borscht Behind the Iron Curtain and Cookin’ in the Kremlin.

Announcer 1: This will be a battle for the ages!

Announcer 2: It looks like the Chairman is about to unveil today’s theme ingredient!

Chairman Kaga had ascended the steps to a large table strewn with metal containers. With a gesture, the Chariman had an assistant cook lift one the lids from the containers to reveal…

MORAL CELERY!!!

Announcer 1: Great Caesar’s Ghost! Iron Chef Jagang didn’t look to pleased with that announcement!

Announcer 2: I doubt Chef Rahl could be happier.

Silence rang through Kitchen Stadium.

“Allez Cuisine!!!†screamed Chairman Kaga.

Richard wore a smug grin as he lumbered up the steps and selected a number of choice pieces of celery. Jagang followed reluctantly.

Announcer 1: Each of our contestants will have one hour to cook an assortment of different meals. At the end of the hour, their dishes will vie for the favor of our five judges.

Announcer 2: Lets ask our floor reporter if can get the contestants to answer a few questions.

Richard had unslung the Sword of Truth, which he was using to slice some celery.

Floor Reporter: Squeeze On! Rahl-San, could you give us an idea of how you think this kitchen battle is going to go?

Richard still wore his smug smirk as he began to expound his ideas at length through his clenched teeth.

“You see,†said Richard, “the theme ingredient will naturally work to my advantage. Iron Chef Jagang is going to have to scramble if he expects to score half as well as I will. But even if the ingredient hadn’t been in my favor I still would have one the battle.â€

Floor Reporter: You’re talking almost if you have already won-

“I am,†interrupted Richard. “You see, Jagang comes from the collectivist school of cooking, where they try to make the ingredients work with each other in harmony. According to the collectivists, you must blend the ingredients so that their flavors will work with each other to create something greater than the sum of their parts. In a way, this is an advantage. They taste like a collective mass, a collective element, like one big centipede.â€

Floor Reporter: I’m, uh, not sure I get the analogy-

Richard’s smirk disappeared and he glared, raptor like, at the floor reporter, his huge manbreasts straining against his black leather war chef outfit as his breathing increased.

Richard ground his teeth. “I don’t cook a “mealâ€. I cook individual pieces of food. I cook according to the principals of Truth. Each piece of food is a complete individual. I do not blend any of the ingredients together to dilute their personality. Every bite from one of my dishes will scythe through your taste buds or explode in your mouth, leaving a melon sized hole.â€

The Floor Reporter could see that Richard was becoming angry so he tried to switch subject.

Floor Reporter: I noticed that you’re not wearing a hat or any sort of hairnet-

“I do not believe in providing support for my hair. If one of my follicles should fall, then it was weak, and clearly unprepared to live life as an individual.â€

The reporter tried to lighten the mood with a joke: Well, I hope you at least wash your hands before you cook-

Richard affixed the reporter with his raptor like gaze but said nothing. Silence rang.

Floor Reporter: Well, uh, er, I better be going-

“Where the Hell do you think your going?†demanded Richard. Chef Rahl stopped slicing celery with his sword and grabbed the reporter.

Floor Reporter: I wanted to let you cook. I was just going to go interview Iron Chef Jagang.

“Like Hell you are,†said Richard, who then began one of his long assed speeches that he was so famous for.

55 minuets later

Announcer 1 (whispering): Is Chef Ralh still talking?

Announcer 2: Yes, and I don’t thinks he’s cooked anything yet either.

Announcer 1: I think we better tell him his time is almost up.

An assistant cook was sent onto the floor to prod Richard with a spatula until he stopped talking.

“Wha…?†asked Richard as the assistant cook whispered in his ear. “Five minuets ! F*ck!†Richard released the floor reporter from his iron grasp and let him slump to the ground.

Richard knew that he was going to have to pull something out of ass, and fast, otherwise his goose was cooked. He picked up his sword.

“Blade, be true this day,†whispered Richard as he dropped into a cooking stance.

Preparer of Food.

Richard’s blade spun through the air like a pinwheel on PCP. Celery flew every which way. For Richard, time stood still, and all he could hear was the beating of his own heart. Richard knew that somehow Jagang had tricked him into frittering away his time. But Richard was not unduly concerned. Using his powers of moral clarity, he saw a way to still salvage the situation.

Preparer of Food.

Richard screamed out orders from between his clenched teeth. As he spoke, assistant cooks began to haul in Richard's secret weapon. The only way to counter Jagang’s scheming was to use only ingredients that possessed moral clarity. Richard hollered in bloodlust as he saw the caged Animals of Truth.

Preparer of Food.

The sword left a metallic blur through the air as it descended on a pack of noble timber wolves. Their whimpers of pain and fear were cut off almost as soon as they were uttered.

Preparer of Food.

The goats went next. Their bleating was no match for Richard’s whirlwind of death. Without hesitation, Richard gutted them from nose to their tiny wagging tails.

Preparer of Food.

And finally there was the walrus. Whirling like a dervish, Richard cut through blubber, bones, and muscle like so much butter.

Preparer of Food.

A bell rang, and the red mist that clouded Richard’s eyes disappeared. It was only then that Richard realized that he was standing in a pool of blood and entrails.

Richard wiped the ropes of sweat from his brow, hooked his thumbs behind his belt and surveyed his handiwork with satisfaction. There was no time to gloat, however, since the assistant cooks had already started to collect the dishes and bring them before the judges.

Richard waited nervously while the judges began to sample Jangang’s dishes.

“This dish is as light as a cloud!†exclaimed a pleased judge. “It reminds me of autumn leaves drifting in the wind!†Jangang murmured his thanks and brought on the next dishes. Each one earned appreciative comments from the judges until finally Richard’s turned arrived.

Steaming and stinking, Richard’s dishes were plopped down in front of the judges.

“Uh, what exactly IS this?†asked one female judge.

“It is timber wolf tartare sprinkling with celery.†The judges gazed at the food with undisguised horror. “Basically, every dish I prepared today is tartare.†The judges began to nibble at the dishes while under Richard’s raptor glare. By the time the final dish arrived, only one of the five judges was still conscious, although his complexion was now a disturbing shade of green.

“My piec de resistance is raw celery wrapped in walrus blubber.†The judge valiantly tried to consume Richard final culinary grotesquery but it was too much. Within moments the judge dropped to the floor stone dead after choking on the blubber.

In the end Chairman Kaga awarded Richard zero points and banished him from Kitchen Stadium.

Richard’s face darkened. “I warn you, Chairman, by awarding this victory to Jagang you are siding with the jackals of evil against moral clarity….â€

12 hours later

“… and you can put that in your pipe and smoke it!†Richard declared. It was only then that he realized that he was standing alone in the middle of a darkened stadium.

“Hello? Is anyone there?†asked Richard.

In the distance he could here some crickets chirping. A lone tumble weed blew across the floor.