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EruditeFool

Official Blatant but Honest Self Promotion Thread

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On 2/25/2016 at 0:26 PM, Andorion said:

I will be picking up the Prince of Thorns trilogy next week for the first time. Looking forward to it!

Here at Lawrence Corp we'd like to congratulate you on a fine purchasing decision that reflects well upon the type of outstanding human you truly are.

 

You'll find the PoT2011 comes in sizes to fit all budgets, from a hardcovered behemoth to the teeny tiny US paperback. Or even a mere dance of electrons. And for the most discerning of connoisseurs there's always the leather-bound special-edition (hides from endangered species only). 

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51 minutes ago, Mark Lawrence said:

Here at Lawrence Corp we'd like to congratulate you on a fine purchasing decision that reflects well upon the type of outstanding human you truly are.

 

You'll find the PoT2011 comes in sizes to fit all budgets, from a hardcovered behemoth to the teeny tiny US paperback. Or even a mere dance of electrons. And for the most discerning of connoisseurs there's always the leather-bound special-edition (hides from endangered species only). 

I love when a product is engineered to suit all sorts of needs!:D

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1 hour ago, Mark Lawrence said:

And for the most discerning of connoisseurs there's always the leather-bound special-edition (hides from endangered species only). 

Is there a reason you don't want endangered species reading your work?

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19 minutes ago, Selysin said:

Is there a reason you don't want endangered species reading your work?

I don't write for losers!

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On 2/26/2016 at 0:36 PM, Mark Lawrence said:

I don't write for losers!

This just convinced me to buy your book.

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On February 23, 2016 at 2:59 PM, MisterOJ said:

I'm confused by this first paragraph. Is the lady referred to large or small? Because in one sentence, she is described as having a "well-rounded frame" which I tend to think means large and curvy. But in a following sentence it says "because she was so very petite, the steps didn’t even so much as groan as she made her way carefully down them" which seems to contradict her being "well-rounded."

First thing that caught my eye as well.  Not a good sign when the descriptors are confusing right out the gate.  Not sure 'well rounded' and 'petite' fall into the same category.  

 

Really tried getting through the few chapters you had posted, chief, but holy shit that's some horrible writing you've got going on there.  You're trying too hard to be gimmicky with the language, the plot is on the back burner, and the fucking purple prose is making my goddam eyes bleed.  I attempted to make sense of what was up on your website, but I still have no fucking clue what the story is about.  I get you are trying to sound olde fashion-y, but it just comes off sounding silly. Focus on the story more, tighten up the text, and then focus on word choice/type.  You're letting your gimmick run your mind.  Not a good way to go. 

 

Seriously, and I'm not trying to be a dick here, but this stuff isn't good.  I know that's hard to hear, and I'm sure you'll deflect, call my avatar stupid, and somehow attempt to invalidate my opinion, but it doesn't change the fact that the stuff you put out into the world is painful to read and the work of someone trying too hard, and not having a fucking clue of what they are doing. 

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4 hours ago, peterbound said:

 

First thing that caught my eye as well.  Not a good sign when the descriptors are confusing right out the gate.  Not sure 'well rounded' and 'petite' fall into the same category.  

 

Really tried getting through the few chapters you had posted, chief, but holy shit that's some horrible writing you've got going on there.  You're trying too hard to be gimmicky with the language, the plot is on the back burner, and the fucking purple prose is making my goddam eyes bleed.  I attempted to make sense of what was up on your website, but I still have no fucking clue what the story is about.  I get you are trying to sound olde fashion-y, but it just comes off sounding silly. Focus on the story more, tighten up the text, and then focus on word choice/type.  You're letting your gimmick run your mind.  Not a good way to go. 

 

Seriously, and I'm not trying to be a dick here, but this stuff isn't good.  I know that's hard to hear, and I'm sure you'll deflect, call my avatar stupid, and somehow attempt to invalidate my opinion, but it doesn't change the fact that the stuff you put out into the world is painful to read and the work of someone trying too hard, and not having a fucking clue of what they are doing. 

 

Oh, you don't sound like a dick at all. And if you have no clue what the story is about, that's fine. I could give all of a rat's ass about your opinion. Opinions are like a**holes, it seems everyone has one.

 

You have demonstrated a total lack of good taste, that is all. Don't worry, I will never post free content in this thread again. B)

Edited by Rychard Wrythen

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19 minutes ago, HelenaExMachina said:

i really want to believe we are all being trolled at this point. 

I know. 

I realize PB was blunt in his assessment, but that's just PB. After reading through some of Rychard's story, I honestly can't disagree with any of the points PB was making.

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You know, if you don't want people reading your shit, maybe don't link to it in your sig?

And if you don't want any one to say anything bad about it ever, I dunno, buy some 5 star reviews? Then go live in a cave on mars?

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Yeah, I'm starting to think this is some form of performance art.

Also, what's wrong with being blunt?

I've never understood the problem with that trait.

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48 minutes ago, Darth Richard II said:

You know, if you don't want people reading your shit, maybe don't link to it in your sig?

And if you don't want any one to say anything bad about it ever, I dunno, buy some 5 star reviews? Then go live in a cave on mars?

 

Listen. Of course I want people to read it. That is the entire point of exposure. However, none of this has been constructive criticism. If you all have shit for taste, which you apparently do, of course my stuff is going to seem like just what you said, shit.

 

And if anyone had actually looked at the link to the definition of self-promotion, they would have seen that the definition allows for things that are not bought and sold. Hell, people hand out flyers on the street and it's still promotion, even though the recipient pays nothing.

 

PB's taste has been displayed on many a thread and believe me, his "blunt" assessment means less than nothing.

Edited by Rychard Wrythen

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And what is your basis on saying we all have shit for taste, other than we don't like your "work"?

 

Hey you can promote all you want, you just need to not have a tantrum when people don't like it.

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1 minute ago, Darth Richard II said:

And what is your basis on saying we all have shit for taste, other than we don't like your "work"?

 

Hey you can promote all you want, you just need to not have a tantrum when people don't like it.

 

Maybe I don't like your choice of words in description of it, so I turned it around so that you could appreciate the effect yourself.

 

And I have no problem with someone not liking it. However, loaded phrases like "no idea what you are doing" and "trying too hard" is more like insulting than critiquing.

 

Nvm. Like I said, it doesn't matter. You can expect a lot more of my "work" in future.

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22 minutes ago, Darth Richard II said:

It's the greatest thread since the lies of lock lamora!...thread!

Hell... what was that line in reference to? I remember the thread, and it was epic. Turned out to be a hoax though, right? I am sad that I can't remember the particulars of it now though.

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