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EruditeFool

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My action sci-fi novella is now up on Amazon via kindle :D

It's called Boldhammer.

 

https://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/aw/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?k=boldhammer

 

please let me know if any problems.  

 

Edit: the previous link went to amazon.com rather than .co.uk.  Its still being processed on the US site, but its fine on amazon.co.uk 

 

 

Edited by Derfel Cadarn

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5 hours ago, Derfel Cadarn said:

My action sci-fi novella is now up on Amazon via kindle :D

It's called Boldhammer.

 

https://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/aw/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?k=boldhammer

 

please let me know if any problems.  

 

Edit: the previous link went to amazon.com rather than .co.uk.  Its still being processed on the US site, but its fine on amazon.co.uk 

 

 

Should be available on US site for US customers.

 

For some reason, Kindle automatically starts the book at the 'beginning' of the story.  There's a small 'glossary' one page back detailing gender-neutral terms I've either borrowed or invented.  If anyone buys it, please leave a review. (Unless you don't like it in which case ... no need! :P)

 

It's also available for free on Kindle Unlimited.

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My new science fiction assassin series is now available for Pre-Order.

AGENT G: INFILTRATOR

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B06XFJ5HF5/

“Black Technology has made murder a billion dollar industry.”

The International Refugee Society has twenty-six cybernetically enhanced “Letters,” and for the right price, they’ll eliminate anyone. They’ve given up their families and their memories for ten years of service with the promise of a life of luxury awaiting them. Agent G is one of these “Letters,” but clues to his past are starting to emerge while he’s on a dangerous mission to infiltrate the Society’s most dangerous competitor. In the midst of all the violence, subterfuge, and deceit, he’ll need to keep his wits about him and trust sparingly.

After all if an organization will kill for money, what would they do to keep the truth hidden?

Edited by C.T. Phipps

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My dark space opera, LUCIFER'S STAR is now available in paperback and ebook format.

https://www.amazon.com/Lucifers-Star-C-T-Phipps-ebook/dp/B01MDM9MCT/

From the bestselling author of The Rules of Supervillainy:

Cassius Mass was the greatest star pilot of the Crius Archduchy. He fought fiercely for his cause, only to watch his nation fall to the Interstellar Commonwealth. It was only after that he realized the side he'd been fighting for was the wrong one. Now a semi-functional navigator on an interstellar freight hauler, he tries to hide who he was and escape his past. Unfortunately, some things refuse to stay buried and he ends up conscripted by the very people who destroyed his homeland.

LUCIFER'S STAR is the first novel of the Lucifer's Star series, a dark science fiction space opera set in a world of aliens, war, politics, and slavery.

I've had a lot of good response to this.

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12 hours ago, mitch176 said:

Howdy everyone. 

If you're looking for some light comedic reading I would love some feedback on the first few chapters of my fantasy novel: http://www.worthyofpublishing.com/book.asp?book_ID=34632

Any criticism, whether constructive or soul destroying is welcome.

Hey, I read your prologue and the first few chapters, and enjoyed it overall.  By no means am I an accomplished writer but I'd like to offer the following feedback:

1) Watch your spelling and word usage - for example, it's "faint", not "feint", stifled is not a great negatory verb for seeing (maybe blinded?), etc.  You want to be taken seriously as a writer so make sure you avoid easily-correctable errors like that to establish your credibility.

2) You have WAY too much background information (ie. infodump) for the prologue.  I found myself immediately confused about the places and people you mentioned in such a short space.  Remember: your world-building may be complete in your mind, but you need to introduce it to your readers in digestible chunks.  Your final draft might have a glossary, map and timeline, but I don't want to be referring to it exhaustively in the first few pages.  I really liked the twist at the end of the prologue and wanted to read more about you-know-who's motives. Don't detract from establishing good hooks such as that by overwhelming your readers with information.

3) Some logic/continuity issues: if the wind is so strong, how can Mordin hear Merrik if he's mumbling his answers?  Could a single log on fire illuminate armoured marching men so far away that you describe it as an "abyss".

4) Repetition: I don't think you need to have Merrik constantly complaining about how cold it is on sentry duty.  I get the point that he's not a great guard and thinks more with his stomach and being warm, but it's a lot of commentary for a short prologue.

5) Similar to 2) - Show, don't tell - for the rest of the chapters try to find a way to cut down on the exposition.  You're trying to set up the story of a bunch of rough-and-tumble characters, but it's jarring to switch between pages of history and the dialogue of your characters. 

Aside from that, I really did like what I've read of your story so far.  You created a vibrant and violent world that believably lends itself to Jamie's plot arc and character development.

 

 

 

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4 hours ago, Tongue Stuck to Wall said:

Hey, I read your prologue and the first few chapters, and enjoyed it overall.  By no means am I an accomplished writer but I'd like to offer the following feedback:

1) Watch your spelling and word usage - for example, it's "faint", not "feint", stifled is not a great negatory verb for seeing (maybe blinded?), etc.  You want to be taken seriously as a writer so make sure you avoid easily-correctable errors like that to establish your credibility.

2) You have WAY too much background information (ie. infodump) for the prologue.  I found myself immediately confused about the places and people you mentioned in such a short space.  Remember: your world-building may be complete in your mind, but you need to introduce it to your readers in digestible chunks.  Your final draft might have a glossary, map and timeline, but I don't want to be referring to it exhaustively in the first few pages.  I really liked the twist at the end of the prologue and wanted to read more about you-know-who's motives. Don't detract from establishing good hooks such as that by overwhelming your readers with information.

3) Some logic/continuity issues: if the wind is so strong, how can Mordin hear Merrik if he's mumbling his answers?  Could a single log on fire illuminate armoured marching men so far away that you describe it as an "abyss".

4) Repetition: I don't think you need to have Merrik constantly complaining about how cold it is on sentry duty.  I get the point that he's not a great guard and thinks more with his stomach and being warm, but it's a lot of commentary for a short prologue.

5) Similar to 2) - Show, don't tell - for the rest of the chapters try to find a way to cut down on the exposition.  You're trying to set up the story of a bunch of rough-and-tumble characters, but it's jarring to switch between pages of history and the dialogue of your characters. 

Aside from that, I really did like what I've read of your story so far.  You created a vibrant and violent world that believably lends itself to Jamie's plot arc and character development.

 

 

 

Thank you very much for that. After roughly 3 years this is the first piece of real feedback that I've been given so I'm grateful. 

The infodump in the prologue was something that I was already aware of and was planning to go back and fix, but it's good to know that it's definitely a problem that needs addressing. 

Everything else was also really useful as for the majority they were things that had escaped my attention, so thank you.

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Mitch, there are a bunch of online writer groups that are great for getting (and giving) feedback. I'm out of the loop a bit (being a slacker these past few years), but I was a part of a great crit group on Forward Motion Writers for years. Also Absolute Write is a great place to find people to get feedback from.

My FMW crit group was really helped me grow as a writer and identify my personal ticks that worked or didn't. It's challenging to find the right mix of people, but so worth it.

Many cities also have writer groups. When I was living in Denver, the Rocky Mountain Fiction Writers had crit groups all over the city that met regularly to read and critique.

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I have a nice little article about what I think about STAR WARS and moral ambiguity up at the Fantasy Book Critic.

http://fantasybookcritic.blogspot.com/2017/05/guest-post-black-and-white-or-gray-in.html

It's got a bit of an advertisement at the end but the point I wish Star Wars would embrace a little more moral ambiguity would be good.

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Somewhat self-promotion but mostly just happy for a friend, my most frequent audiobook narrator, JEFFREY KAFER, got honored by Audible today with his work shown on their 'Stars of Audio.' It's selfish because two of my books were shown among his best.

https://www.audible.com/mt/NarratorFirsts

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Not promoting my work here, but that of Babyraven, whom some may remember from the board in the old days. As part of a film class, she produced a short documentary, and I was honored to have my podcast be part of it. I am sure that Babyraven would appreciate any likes/comments you throw her way--she did a good job!

 

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I have a new book coming out!  The Wages of Sin will be released from Elsewhen Press in ebook in June and in paperback in late July/early August.

Quote

One young woman dies and another vanishes on the same chilly spring night. Connor Cardwain sees no reason to link his cleaner Merissa’s murder to a mystery anchored within a high-end warship sales team, but reconsiders his position when he realises both women were connected to a foreign runaway.

Armed with an enterprising widow, an imperial spy and his own wits, Connor sets out to find the missing woman, in a city streaked with vice and a planet upturned by other ganglanders’ ambition. If he fails to beat arms dealers, aristocrats, pirates and human traffickers at their own game, he and all his team will pay the price – and the wages of sin are death.

 

The ebook is available for pre-order.  Links are at the bottom of this page to pre-order in Apple iBooks, Kobo, Google Books and for Kindle in thirteen countries including the UK, the US, Australia, NZ, France and Germany.  A Nook ebook version will be available before too long...

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