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Count Balerion

Outrageous Lies, version 21 (ignorance is bliss; but you will still be tested when the thread is finished)

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CB started a cult that worships Minstral and The Mysteries of the Universe. They also made Baltan their evil figure whom they believe tempts them with earthly possessions and they can never be free from temptation unless they give all their possessions to CB.

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Ashara_Dayne actually is THE Ashara Dayne.... as well as Lemore, Melisandre, and Howland Reed.

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Minstral is Daario, the High Sparrow, and the ghost of Tytos Lannister who goes around trying to cheer up the people of Casterly Rock because under Twyin's leadership everything has gotten rather dull.

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Westerosi Batgirl has always been proud of her Prom Queen title, until recently when she was diagnosed with dyslexia. That's when she realized that her title was in fact Porn Queen.

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Ashara_Dayne tried to kidnap Rudolph because he would have been the perfect accessory at her night club. Unfortunately Rudolph was killed by one of Heatmeiser's fireballs during the kidnapping.

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LB kidnaps Santa's elves sometimes, just to make them dance. That's how she knows.

Dangerously close to truth there.  I actually am writing a novel set in the North Pole and I think I've had some of the elves dancing. If not, I'm totally adding that now!

 

 

WB instigated the War of the Five Santas with the noble goal of redistributing all the presents.

CB misunderstood the goal of the War of the Five Santas.  It was actually to redistribute the peasants, thereby changing the territories each Santa covers;  much like redrawing district lines in politics.

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Lady B is  responsible for the fall/disappearance/destruction of Atlantis, Troy, the Indus Valley Civilization, Pompeii, the Roman Empire, the Eastern Roman Empire, the Holy Roman Empire, the Golden Horde, the lost colony of Roanoke, the Shogunate, The Second French Empire and the dinosaurs because (and I quote) "they were in [her] way"

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Orphalesion thought that telling Lady B's secret identity would put a stop to her civilization crushing ways...sadly it just made her move up her timetable on wiping out his own home...leaving only his dirty smallclothes and a box of saltines.

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