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Count Balerion

Outrageous Lies, version 21 (ignorance is bliss; but you will still be tested when the thread is finished)

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Prphalesion recently got a new at a new firm where where his real father works. He didn't know any of these tings though because he lost his cellphone and the person who found it simply answered the call and then sold the phone.

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Minstral sold his soul to the devil, but then he realized he had the soul of Captain Jack Sparrow. And that, children, is how the Devil came to wear Pradas

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Ashara asked GRRM to write a chapter written in Hodor's PoV. This is what he sent her

Hodor is coming, Ch. 1661
Hodor's back was itching something fierce. 

"Hodor" he said, asking Bran to scratch his back.

"I know Hodor, I'm feeling hungry too" Bran said. 

"Hodor hodor!" Hodor exclaimed angrily

"Is he having one of his fits again?" Meera asked cautiously

"Hodor! Hodor!" shouted Hodor as the itching intensified

"Hodor stop! You'll-" started Bran but Hodor was having none of it

"HODOOOR!" he hodor'd as the intensity intensified. Through the haze of itching he felt Bran shift in his basket...

...and then his world went black.

We need to honour the greatness of this piece of literature.

 

Also: *snort*

 

Moraith still does not know why the rum is always gone

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:D
[spoiler]I'm a humble man. The love of the members, a few valyrrian swords, a lordship and your blessings would suffice ;) :D)[/spoiler]

I told Ashara she'd drawn her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised

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Still, the most amazing PoV keeps being the Count's:

 

 

1 01 0 10100010 1010 01010101111001010 00010000101000101010 011010100101 00  00010 1.

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Baltan finds the Count's chapter of binary code the most interesting because she is really am android, programmed to mimic human behaviour as closely as possible. Her being a robot comes with many advantages to her close circle of best friends/secret keepers such as the fact that she can dispense 10 flavours of frozen yogurt out of the chutes located in her hollow fingers. 

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Orphalesion tries to annoy android Baltan by constantly quoting I Robot, Chobits, and Transformers. Unfortunately O hasn't realized that the only thing that annoys androids are quotes from Short Circuit.

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Westerosi Batgirl lost a bet recently where she will need to dress as a Westerosi Harley Quinn.

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M, knowing that bet, is goning to wear the same costume as WB at said party, so WB is going to be laughed at not only because she wears the costume of her nemesis, but because she's wearing a repeated costume.

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B argues quite convincingly that Daenerys was a Westerosi Harley Davidson Queen Robot.

[Speaking of Hodor's POV chapter: https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/59/f9/ea/59f9ea9914a64e09f2dc3b995ebb4a37.jpg]

[and I found the discussion where we proved that Joffrey was the true hero: http://asoiaf.westeros.org/index.php/topic/98068-joffrey-vs-viserys/page-4]

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That is because Ashara hides under his bed and pricks his toes with a toothpick whenever he turns the lights off.

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Westerosi Batgirl spent her teenage years as an idol singer in Japan, singing extremely upbeat J-Pop with word salad lyrics, including her biggest hit single "Maggots in the Microwave" the video of which had her dancing in a "cute" maggot costume.  

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Orphalesion couldn't quite remember how to throw a boomerang, but eventually it came back to her

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Recently, Moriath tried to throw a boomerang the right way but it came back wrong...it ended up going in the opposite direction it was thrown. When he tried to catch it with his good hand he misjudgedthe distance and it whacked him in the other hand. Other incidents like this have convinced him that boomerang are sapient and out to get him, so he goes.around trying to destroy all the ones he sees..... But they keep coming back.

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