Sand11751 Posted April 26, 2016 Share Posted April 26, 2016 3 minutes ago, PromethiumWings said: ...like the "you want a nice girl but you need a bad pussey"-comment, 1 Lol I was just thinking, if I never hear or see these words again in my lifetime, but you just HAD to put them here! If I could scrub my mind free of that scene, and Dorne as a whole, I'd love this show even more. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cragen Posted April 26, 2016 Share Posted April 26, 2016 I'm really sick of whining, books are better then adaptation every time, get over it. Dorne without Aegon is nothing, I'm sure that we have Dorne in the show only because of Tyrion trail by combat. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JonSnow4President Posted April 26, 2016 Share Posted April 26, 2016 (edited) And when I say 2, I'm using more an Angry Joe (video game reviewer) rating scale. 10/10 is legendary. The top tier, that while they might have flaws, are overall masterpieces for the type of games they are, that are absolutely amazing in almost all respects (fun gameplay, convincing story with believable characters, good sound design, good graphics, etc. 9/10 is amazing. These are the games where something wasn't quite great, but are still great plays worth every dollar of the purchase price. 8/10 is great. These are the games they fall a little short of the amazing qualification. Still, most of the games here still get his "bad ass" seal of approval and an unqualified buy this game recommendation. 7/10 is good. These are games that do what they do well, but aren't quite the well rounded masterpieces. Still a very strong "buy this game" recommendation, typically with a caveat for liking the genre. 6/10 is above average. These games have one or two good aspects (like Star Wars Battlefront's sound design and graphics), but are lacking in other areas to where the game plays largely as just another game. 5/10 is average. Nothing really remarkable overall about these. The majority of games he reviews are in this 5-7 tier. 4/10 is below average. Basically do things a little worse than normal. 3/10 is bad. Self explanatory, the game does a lot wrong, and does very little right to make up for it. 2/10 is awful. Does almost nothing right. 1/10 is wtf?!? These violate fundamental rules (like the game working) while being poorly designed messes. So if I'm applying this scale, rather than a more Americanized school grading scale some seem to use, I'm giving this episode something on the bottom end of that range. Dorne + Trystane's cabin is such an unmitigated disaster is deserves a very defendable 1, and is so bad and so prevalent that the 1 should be heavily weighted. The Wall scenes are probably a 4-5. There's some good aspects, but there's a lot of logic issues going on in the story. Nothing really stands out on the positive side either. Carice acts her socks off. I'm giving the show the benefit of the doubt and not knocking them down for treating an old lady's naked body as shocking, because I think there is thematic significance in Mel looking and reflecting on the lie. Mereen is in the 2-5 area, highly dependent on if you consider adaptation in your grade or not. Blatant nonsensical explanations for why we have the scene (we're dressed as merchants so it's totes okay). The perpetuation of Saint Tyrion (who will soon arise as Tyrion Christ) is annoying from the book side, and why I would give it a lower grade. Utterly forgettable as well. Outside of Tyrion Christ and the dressed as merchants, I can't remember a thing about what Varys and Tyrion were discussing, and I've watched this twice. Winterfell is a solid 2. Very tired of the focus on Ramsey. The importance of holding Sansa to unite the North against the Lannisters also contradicts earlier scenes where they don't have to worry about the Lannister's because they've never marched an army North. Outside Winterfell is a 4 for me. Sansa is annoying. She is dumber than a sack of potatoes. She seeks Theon's approval before accepting Brienne into her service, showing she is still nowhere remotely near being a manipulative player. Brienne suffers no consequences for choosing revenge, and I still don't know how she even knew Sansa escaped (10-20 second fix there). We also have disappearing dogs and a Bolton soldier still breathing (and I'm fed up with continuity errors, both minor and major at this point). The only thing saving this is not-awful choreography and moment that in isolation of all other factors is a powerful scene between Brienne and Sansa. Dothraki Sea is 4-5, but is such a small part of the episode that I'd give it a low weight. The joke about the sass talking bloodriders was funny in the same way I joke around with my friends, so that bumps it up a bit. However, the Dothraki break their own show-verse rules so Dany doesn't get raped, without any explanation for doing so. Those that give a bigger weight to the continuation of the objectification of women that the show has really stretched beyond the breaking point will likely give this portion a much lower score. I don't crucify it here because it fits IMO with the Dothraki. Kings Landing I probably give this a 5. On one hand, Nicolaj and Lena can act. If the scene ended with the boat coming to shore, I'd give this section somewhere in the 8-9 range on the strength of the acting alone. But with the continuation of continuity errors, no mention of the trials Cersei has undergone or Jaime's reaction, and the weird writing choice where Cersei just accepts Myrcella's death as prophecy without a charcter "I'll burn their cities to the ground," it just falls flat. I'd probably give it a 4 on its own, but like I said the acting brings it up a bit. Braavos is once a variable score for adaptation. It's a complete meh on its own, but with the changes from the implicit training in the book, that specifically is presented as non-personal, compared to the almost hateful abuse from the Waif, and the fact that super assassin training takes place in public, I drop this to around a 3 personally. So with a massive 1 for Dorne (and I do mean massive), a 2 for Mereen, a 2 for Winterfell, a 4 for Sansa, 3 fro Braavos, 4 for the Dothraki Sea, a 5 for our short glimpse at Kings Landing, and a 4 for the Wall, I give this episode overall somewhere between a 2 and a 3. There wasn't anything really remarkable on the positive side, and some pretty major issues on the negative side. Edited April 26, 2016 by JonSnow4President Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jedi Renee Posted April 26, 2016 Share Posted April 26, 2016 5 hours ago, RhaeBee said: Oh please no. He has to be dead. I was actually hoping after the trailer that he would be one of the flayed corpses the Boltons burn and that would put the cream on the cake and finalize his death. Update: just came across an interview where he's said to "not return", so he should be dead dead. I've read the Stephen dilane interview where he said he didn't like the show, wasn't given much info on his character and did it for the money. I think he would come back if only for the money Never say never til we see a body or Brienne confirms what took place Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Orion Posted April 26, 2016 Share Posted April 26, 2016 Dorne is horrible. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RhaenysBee Posted April 27, 2016 Share Posted April 27, 2016 2 hours ago, Jedi Renee said: I've read the Stephen dilane interview where he said he didn't like the show, wasn't given much info on his character and did it for the money. I think he would come back if only for the money Never say never til we see a body or Brienne confirms what took place Yeah, I read that too and I can totally see why he would say that. I for one always disliked Stannis as person and found him absolutely mediocre as a character. Now I'm hoping for Brienne mentioning him when she updates Sansa next episode. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tony Inchpractice Posted April 27, 2016 Share Posted April 27, 2016 Continuing the sandwich metaphor, my review of the episode is: shit sandwich. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Holymoly Posted April 27, 2016 Share Posted April 27, 2016 13 hours ago, Sand11751 said: And none of the Dothraki ever heard of that silver-haired chick Khal Drogo married? Yet they take her word she was a khalessi? Plus, one look at her eyebrows would have told them the carpet doesn't match the curtains. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Channel4s-JonSnow Posted April 27, 2016 Share Posted April 27, 2016 A solid 8 episode for me. It would have been a 9 but there was Dorne, but even then I enjoyed those scenes in their brief form, and look forward to Dorne being less utilized and dragged out like the books. Otherwise its hard to criticise that episode, it was a solid entertaining start to the season. It covered a lot other the plots and brought you back into the world, made you aware of what is going on everywhere and made you want to find out more. It was beautifully shot and I enjoyed literally every scene. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cheesemaster93 Posted April 27, 2016 Share Posted April 27, 2016 (edited) I would rate it 2 for Dorne, and 8 for the rest of the episode. Dorne made no sense and was a disaster. The saving grace is that I don't think it could get any worse from here on, with respect to the Sand Snakes, though D&D could surprise for sure. Edited April 27, 2016 by cheesemaster93 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Woman of War Posted April 27, 2016 Share Posted April 27, 2016 I gave it an 8. there was Dorne....ok....we know by now...it won't be over since there are the two assassins left, so let's see what the show is going to make of them. I nurture a tiny sparkle of hope that Areo is not dead in the end, I guess I am delusional but he did not deserve this banality of an exit. And the Varys/Tyrion dialogue was a bit lacking, we know that Tyrion makes cock jokes by now. If they want to present his cynicism they could have found something else! I expect more from Tyrion, make better use of Dinklage! I loved Cersei, Headey was great, and Jaime, this is promising and it is far better for the story if Jaime and Cersei do not fall apart so soon. Theon and Sansa running was so well done, the light, the colors. It's always Sansa who gets the best coloring, the best use of light and optical effects, magical. Yes, there is inconsistency with dogs and surviving the water. I have run marathons myself at below zero degrees C. If they had taken their clothes over their head before going into the water they could have been fine. But this is nitpicking, it does not diminish the beauty of the scene. I liked the desperate moment of closeness between the two. And the oath was so beautiful. Of course Sansa takes every advice she can get, in that case from Theon, her next advisor may be Pod or Brienne. It would rather be unbelievable if Sansa in that situation could have recited the oath properly. And I am sure there is a reason Pod has to be established, once again, as being far more clever than he appears. He did his best to fight, touching. Davis was, once again, great. The athmosphere at the wall, everything had that melancholic tension. And I liked how the Melisandre revelation was done. She had given up, no need anymore to keep any illusion not for others nor for herself, withthat look into the mirror she said goodbye to the world and she went to bed, maybe hoping she might sleep forever. yes, they had the courage to show a really old woman naked, nice subversion of all image of GOT. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Killer Snark Posted April 27, 2016 Share Posted April 27, 2016 (edited) 5 hours ago, Holymoly said: Plus, one look at her eyebrows would have told them the carpet doesn't match the curtains. That's exactly what I said earlier. That whole 'pussy hair' exchange made no sense whatsoever. I actually like Emilia Clarke, but I dearly wish the costume department had decided to dye her eyebrows. The obvious clash between Clarke's natural hair colour and the character's is an annoyance point to this day. It's possible to be blond and have dark eyebrows, but not with that colour of hair. Edited April 27, 2016 by The Killer Snark Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Noct Posted April 27, 2016 Share Posted April 27, 2016 2 hours ago, Woman of War said: I gave it an 8. Theon and Sansa running was so well done, the light, the colors. It's always Sansa who gets the best coloring, the best use of light and optical effects, magical. Yes, there is inconsistency with dogs and surviving the water. I have run marathons myself at below zero degrees C. If they had taken their clothes over their head before going into the water they could have been fine. But this is nitpicking, it does not diminish the beauty of the scene. I liked the desperate moment of closeness between the two. And the oath was so beautiful. Of course Sansa takes every advice she can get, in that case from Theon, her next advisor may be Pod or Brienne. It would rather be unbelievable if Sansa in that situation could have recited the oath properly. And I am sure there is a reason Pod has to be established, once again, as being far more clever than he appears. He did his best to fight, touching. The premiere made me to finally join the forums and Woman's post is exactly how I felt when the episode ended. I loved Sansa's scene and I don't even like her. Dorne was meh yes but I got such a nostalgic book vibe from Sansa and Brienne. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Talking Hodor Posted April 27, 2016 Share Posted April 27, 2016 On 25.4.2016 at 5:54 AM, Ser Not Appearing said: I gave it an 8. Typical episode one setup. Complaints are: Dorne - Less awkward overall, but more wtf in terms of the plot twist... and somehow anticlimactic. Also, still just don't but these actresses as badass, which is unfortunate. They just come off as soft. Inconsistencies - Sansa needs lessons on courtesies? Really? I get that she's shellshockef but that was just off-putting. Sand snakes teleported and pulled off a double-secret assassination? Did they sleep with Ramsay and get an invincibility STD or what? Let's see how well anyone remembers some rarely used oath after a months-long Ramsay rape fest, a giant leap into a snowbank that had to be 20 feet deep in order to break their falls uninjured, a hopeless trudge through rough terrain and a freakin' ice river, not to mention the epic battle swirling around them. Besides, that oath was more the sort of thing an adult lord/lady would quote to a protector, not something a child would need to use much. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JonSnow4President Posted April 27, 2016 Share Posted April 27, 2016 7 minutes ago, Talking Hodor said: Let's see how well anyone remembers some rarely used oath after a months-long Ramsay rape fest, a giant leap into a snowbank that had to be 20 feet deep in order to break their falls uninjured, a hopeless trudge through rough terrain and a freakin' ice river, not to mention the epic battle swirling around them. Besides, that oath was more the sort of thing an adult lord/lady would quote to a protector, not something a child would need to use much. There's not more than 3 inches of snow outside Winterfell.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Talking Hodor Posted April 27, 2016 Share Posted April 27, 2016 Whoa, tough crowd. Well, I gave it a 9. All the hatred against the Sand Snakes is now justifiable, and they'll probably meet their end in a Lannister-Dorne battle royale, culminating in Daenerys turning the survivors into dragon chow. Sansa getting rescued by Brienne was awesome. Her forgetting her lines is easily explained by the months of trauma she suffered immediately prior to needing to recall them. Castle Black was good - of course Alliser Thorne is going to be polite at first - he's trying to not lose his few remaining followers and is hoping Davos is as gullible as Stannis. Plus his only hope of maintaining control of the remainder is to convince them that his actions were justified. Arya's scene didn't reveal much new; it's still basically in book 5 territory. Mereen was a bit unrealistic. I seriously think it would be a bad idea to walk around unarmed in that city right now. I am interested in knowing how Tyrion can possibly unfuck that mess, especially now that the ships are gone. The Dothraki sea was perfectly realistic. Of course some anonymous khal won't know who Daenerys is. The Dothraki sea is a huge place, and a rival khalasar wouldn't necessarily have ever seen her before. Her going to Vaes Dothrak is obvious. I think Jorah Mormont explained that to her back in season 1 while she was about to choke back a horse heart, but she probably doesn't remember the details much. Melisandre's traumatically ancient tetas seem to confirm one good theory - that she's the daughter of Sheira Seastar and the Three-Eyed-Crow Brynden Rivers. Her oldness seems to make sense with that. I'm personally enjoying being in uncharted territory and seeing how much the show diverges from the book. I fail to understand the huge backlash here. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batman Posted April 27, 2016 Share Posted April 27, 2016 That was so lame. It was like a few minutes per character to get everyone updated. It was just so nothing. Davos - Does nothing Dany - Does nothing Tyrion - Walks around......doing nothing Dario & Jorah - Ride around.......doing nothing Mel - Looks old........but does nothing Ramsay - Looks at a corpse........both of them do nothing Only in Sansa and Dorne's storyline does something happen. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dbunting Posted April 27, 2016 Share Posted April 27, 2016 7 hours ago, Holymoly said: Plus, one look at her eyebrows would have told them the carpet doesn't match the curtains. That has always bugged me! I know it shouldn't but damn if you make her a blonde then make it match. Same with Cersei but less noticeable. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Channel4s-JonSnow Posted April 27, 2016 Share Posted April 27, 2016 24 minutes ago, Batman said: That was so lame. It was like a few minutes per character to get everyone updated. It was just so nothing. Davos - Does nothing Dany - Does nothing Tyrion - Walks around......doing nothing Dario & Jorah - Ride around.......doing nothing Mel - Looks old........but does nothing Ramsay - Looks at a corpse........both of them do nothing Only in Sansa and Dorne's storyline does something happen. Its called setup Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dbunting Posted April 27, 2016 Share Posted April 27, 2016 1 hour ago, Talking Hodor said: Let's see how well anyone remembers some rarely used oath after a months-long Ramsay rape fest, a giant leap into a snowbank that had to be 20 feet deep in order to break their falls uninjured, a hopeless trudge through rough terrain and a freakin' ice river, not to mention the epic battle swirling around them. Besides, that oath was more the sort of thing an adult lord/lady would quote to a protector, not something a child would need to use much. More so than that, why would Sansa even know this oath? These oaths are typically taken of men, not women. Her only knowledge of this would be witnessing others swear it to her father. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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