Be as unhelpful as possible 2.to

[Count Balerion]

The Iron Bank never sleeps.

Who killed Harzoo?

[Jez Bell]

Harz who?

 

Is Tycho Nestoris a faceless man?

[Raisin' Bran]

I am pretty sure we have a description of his face.

What does the House of Black and White do with rogue faceless men?

[Jez Bell]

The problem is finding them.

Can a faceless man find love?

[Westorosi Batgirl]

Faceless men track down what they've been hired to kill.

How does Bloodraven use the bathroom in his current state?

[Count Balerion]

That cave didn't have a bathroom, that I recall.

Are there luxury hotels north of the Wall?

[Raisin' Bran]

My travel agent went out of business 14 years ago.

What amenities are can I find at Hardhome?

[Joy Hill]

I sure hope there's a karaoke bar.

What song should I choose to sing with Roose Bolton?

[Count Balerion]

I don't think he's the musical type.

What's the difference between Arys and Aerys?

[Jez Bell]

The second spells his name with an "e".

Who has the most fashionable armor in Westeros?

[Queen of Procrastination]

Just look at the winner of last year's fashion contest.

Where is Brightroar?

[Raisin' Bran]

Paying the Lannister's debt.

What lives in the Smoking Sea?

[Count Balerion]

Presumably smokers.

Did the sourleaf industry challenge Grand Maester Pycelle to single combat after he issued his health warning?

[Joy Hill]

I'm more concerned about whether the beet lobby is plotting Tommen's murder.

Who was the last winner of Dancing with the Lords?

[Raisin' Bran]

Ain't nobody got time fo that.

 

To whom would I pay taxes if I perchance lived in Lannisport?

[Jez Bell]

It's not how much or to whom that you should be worried about... it's whether you can file them on something the size of a postcard that matters.

When it comes to swords, does size matter?

[Count Balerion]

Always check the unit price when buying a sword.

I'm confused. Why can't I find Westernoss on the globe?

[Raisin' Bran]

Keep looking. I am sure you will eventually find it.

How can I silence the bells in my head?

[Howlin' Howland]

Use a hammer.

What's a great Christmas gift for someone who has everything?

[Count Balerion]

If someone else has everything, no one else has anything, so they can't give it unless they steal it first--which is kind of cheating.

What does the 3rd "the" on page 547 of FFC mean?