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Smaller Things Even Less Worthy of a Thread of Their Own

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26 minutes ago, Tywin et al. said:

You know it wasn't me.  I would have called in a large trash panda.  Tiger, pfft.  I do have a mini tiger at home.  But he's strictly indoors.

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30 minutes ago, Tywin et al. said:

I'm not from NYC, was born and raised in Rochester which is about 350 miles away.  Anyway, this does remind me of a personal anecdote.  A couple years ago I went outside my apartment building at night for a cigarette.  There was a raccoon going through the trash bin which is about five feet away from the entrance.  I didn't notice it at first and was stunned.  So was it - just stared at me for about five seconds.  Once I regained my composure I scared it off, chasing it into the woods behind our parking lot. 

Anyway, I'd never seen a raccoon up close and was quite surprised at how big it was.  Wikipedia says 16 to 28 inches in body length, but I swear to god that fucker was bigger than that (in fact I think it'd have to be to rummage through the opening to the trash bin the way it was)...Ok, reading further the wiki page says the largest wild raccoon was measured at 55 inches in total length.  It wasn't that big.  I was also surprised at how beautiful it's coat was, really rich fur.

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46 minutes ago, dmc515 said:

I'm not from NYC, was born and raised in Rochester which is about 350 miles away.  Anyway, this does remind me of a personal anecdote.  A couple years ago I went outside my apartment building at night for a cigarette.  There was a raccoon going through the trash bin which is about five feet away from the entrance.  I didn't notice it at first and was stunned.  So was it - just stared at me for about five seconds.  Once I regained my composure I scared it off, chasing it into the woods behind our parking lot. 

Anyway, I'd never seen a raccoon up close and was quite surprised at how big it was.  Wikipedia says 16 to 28 inches in body length, but I swear to god that fucker was bigger than that (in fact I think it'd have to be to rummage through the opening to the trash bin the way it was)...Ok, reading further the wiki page says the largest wild raccoon was measured at 55 inches in total length.  It wasn't that big.  I was also surprised at how beautiful it's coat was, really rich fur.

Raccoons in Toronto are as common as squirrels and have developed the ability to open the most ingenious of locks on garbage bins and recycling bins.  We even had one hop onto a subway train to get to a better part of town during rush hour. If you want to see raccoons  up close come to Toronto. 

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paraphrasing this as the thread for 'unexpressed thoughts which are of no value to anyone' I do declare that I love to whine in an over-the-top, dramatic fashion.

For instance, right now I have successfully reached my home through an unseasonable blizzard with hopes that in 5 hours I will be constitutionally capable of returning to work--in this case, to hear more ear worms.  Part of me would love to extol fulsomely on the horrors of sitting in a chair listening to pop music for upwards of 15 hours a day but I can't do that because some people have real problems.

However, I will say that one of the joys of living alone is that I may come home and moan audibly when I take off my boots and run my toes through the shag carpet.  If my back/feet/knees hurt me I can cry out with no regard for others who may roll their eyes in disgust.

As a non-sequitur, I will only add--Please, stop with the dancing!  Oh dear Jesus, it's only April.  There will be more dancing to more pop tunes.  I've got two more months of it to endure.  My ebooks cannot save me.  Thoughtful reflection on the state of the world cannot save me.  In five hours I have to get up and do it all again.  

 

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Raccoon stories:

My mom worked at a local park when I was a kid that has a small nature center, which includes a bunch of local wildlife.  Because of this, people would often drop off injured or orphaned animals there, long story short my mom would end up bringing home animals that the park couldn't take.  We had peacocks, squirrels, goats, ferrets, and more.

When I was 5 or 6 we had three baby raccoons for a couple of weeks until we found homes for them (Lutz museum in Manchester CT if irc).  They were small cat sized, super cool, and very sociable.  They liked being handled and hanging out on your shoulder.  

They slept in a dog carrier but had the run of the house under human supervision.  I remember getting to feed them from a baby bottle.

About twenty years later my dog and I were accosted by a very large and angry raccoon on the dock of the marina I was living at.  I ended up kicking it into the water when it charged my dog.  Was mostly worried about rabies.

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A belated thanks to all the nerds who responded to my comment about IQ ^_^.

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56 minutes ago, Ben Dover said:

A belated thanks to all the nerds who responded to my comment about IQ ^_^.

Hah! In before the lock.

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On 4/13/2018 at 10:08 AM, Mlle. Zabzie said:

You know it wasn't me.  I would have called in a large trash panda.  Tiger, pfft.  I do have a mini tiger at home.  But he's strictly indoors.

 

On 4/13/2018 at 10:28 AM, dmc515 said:

snip

I'm glad to see I sufficiently wasted your valuable time. :P 

 

On 4/15/2018 at 9:49 AM, larrytheimp said:

When I was 5 or 6 we had three baby raccoons for a couple of weeks until we found homes for them (Lutz museum in Manchester CT if irc).  They were small cat sized, super cool, and very sociable.  They liked being handled and hanging out on your shoulder.  

There was a baby raccoon at my parent's place not that long ago. It was clinging on to the side of their house, paralyzed with fear. The thing was really cute. They also found a possum sleeping in a giant bucket of leaves. They too are cute, until they open their mouths. Good god that thing must have been summed from hell. 

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2 hours ago, maarsen said:

Hah! In before the lock.

Bwuh? Is it me?

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23 minutes ago, Tywin et al. said:

 

I'm glad to see I sufficiently wasted your valuable time. :P 

 

There was a baby raccoon at my parent's place not that long ago. It was clinging on to the side of their house, paralyzed with fear. The thing was really cute. They also found a possum sleeping in a giant bucket of leaves. They too are cute, until they open their mouths. Good god that thing must have been summed from hell. 

Just remember:. Get your rabies shot so you can hug decrepit wildlife

#antiantivaxx #raccoonhug #opossumcuddle

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3 hours ago, Tywin et al. said:

I'm glad to see I sufficiently wasted your valuable time. :P

And now you've wasted more...Sonofabitch.  BUT, my time isn't really valuable.  I suppose it is to some people, but they can all go fuck themselves.

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