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ASOIAF Jokes

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Posted (edited)

I have just found another hidden naughty gem...

Quote

A Storm of Swords - Sansa VII (last chapter of ASoS)

Since coming to the Eyrie, the singer had become her favorite. He sang Lord Robert to sleep every night, and tweaked the noses of Lady Lysa's suitors with verses that made mock of their foibles. Her aunt had showered him with gold and gifts; costly clothes, a gold arm ring, a belt studded with moonstones, a fine horse.

Ok, we could give GRRM the benefit of the doubt on this one...Except that in the next chapter:

Quote

A Feast for Crows - The Prophet (1st chapter of AFfC)

The Drowned God gives every man a gift, even him; no man could piss longer or farther than Aeron Greyjoy, as he proved at every feast. Once he bet his new longship against a herd of goats that he could quench a hearthfire with no more than his cock. Aeron feasted on goat for a year, and named the longship Golden Storm, though Balon threatened to hang him from her mast when he heard what sort of ram his brother proposed to mount upon her prow.

 

Naughty naughty George! :P

Edited by Jô Maltese
Emphasis

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On 8/12/2018 at 10:14 AM, Skahaz mo Kandaq said:

How come Ned kept Hodor after firing the other stable boys?

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Hodor is the only one who didn't try to saddle Arya!

 

He's a man of few words.

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On 3/13/2019 at 7:58 PM, Victor Newman said:
  On 8/12/2018 at 10:14 AM, Skahaz mo Kandaq said:

How come Ned kept Hodor after firing the other stable boys?

  Hide contents

Hodor is the only one who didn't try to saddle Arya!

 

He's a man of few words.

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On 3/13/2019 at 7:58 PM, Victor Newman said:

He's a man of few words.

He talks a lot.  Just not much variety in his vocabulary.  I guess you could say he has a small vocabulary.

On 3/13/2019 at 7:58 PM, Victor Newman said:

How come Ned kept Hodor after firing the other stable boys?

All the other stable boys tried to put a bit in Arya's mouth.

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On 8/13/2018 at 10:26 PM, Magnus9 said:

How many Kingsguard does it take to screw in a light bulb?

 

What's a lightbulb?

Well it only took one Kettleblack to screw Cersei

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