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Wizz-The-Smith

ASOIAF Limericks

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It's been a while since we had a limericks thread and they're always good fun.  Funny ones, serious ones, anything goes.  I'll kick things off.........

 

''But I saw the White Walkers'' he said,

Though unfortunately still lost his head.

For deserters will pay,

''Bran don't look away''

Poor old Gared was sentenced by Ned.

 

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So, once he was wed to the trees

Bran picked up the language with ease

He learns the true tongue

Which might seem far flung

But for rustling of leaves on the breeze

 

There once was a smith in Kings Landing

Whom the Hand sought to seek understanding

Robert's bastard he found

All this time underground

And the craft to his work was outstanding

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14 hours ago, Foot_Of_The_King said:

There once was a boy named Snow

He had no place to go

At the beginning of Fall

He went to the Wall

and then he became a Crow

Love it!  :D

5 hours ago, Lost Melnibonean said:

Brilliant! 

:cheers:

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There once was a dragon to dread,

Spreading fear as he flew overhead.

And there's no fighting back,

With Balerion the Black

Or he'll burn you and leave you all dead. 

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To the North, it was quite part and parcel 

That the Starks controlled Winterfell castle

Till the ruling young kid

Was deposed by a squid

Now considered a treacherous arsehole.

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There once was a girl called Lisa

George tried but he could not please her

For reasons complex (...or simply just sex)

She ran off with myst'ry man 'X'

Whose real name remains a teaser 

 

Spurned, poor George nursed his broken heart

Pouring his grief into his art

'Lya', 'Lyanna', 'Melisa', 'Lysa' or 'Nissa'

Just playing the part...

Of the same lost girl, forever repeating

The doomed love triangle at the start. 

 

Quote

 

A Dance with Dragons - A Ghost in Winterfell

It all seemed so familiar, like a mummer show that he had seen before. Only the mummers had changed. Roose Bolton was playing the part that Theon had played the last time round, and the dead men were playing the parts of Aggar, Gynir Rednose, and Gelmarr the Grim. Reek was there too, he remembered, but he was a different Reek, a Reek with bloody hands and lies dripping from his lips, sweet as honey. Reek, Reek, it rhymes with sneak.

 

 

Edited by ravenous reader

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14 hours ago, Roose Boltons Pet Leech said:

To the North, it was quite part and parcel 

That the Starks controlled Winterfell castle

Till the ruling young kid

Was deposed by a squid

Now considered a treacherous arsehole.

Hi Roose Boltons Pet Leech, I love your limericks, especially this one  :rolleyes:  Great job.  :)

54 minutes ago, ravenous reader said:

There once was a girl called Lisa

George tried but he could not please her

For reasons complex (...or simply just sex)

She ran off with myst'ry man 'X'

Whose real name remains a teaser 

 

Spurned, poor George nursed his broken heart

Pouring his grief into his art

'Lya', 'Lyanna', 'Melisa', 'Lysa' or 'Nissa'

Just playing the part...

Of the same lost girl, forever repeating

The doomed love triangle at the start.

LOL!  I'm very pleased the 'Poetess of the Nennymoans' has added her lyrical prowess to the thread, love it!  :D 

An ode to the ubiquitous love triangles, and of course the identity of mystery man X, whose name after much research remains a secret.  Poetically puzzling.  :P 

Edited by Wizz-The-Smith

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Now Lord Manderly suffered no lies,

So he looked the Frey's right in the eyes.

T'was guilt that he saw,

Red Wedding's still raw

Then he had all three baked into pies. 

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Knighted by a prince, drunk down by a king,

I kissed a maid, now decomposing.

Laughed at by a tree,

No Kingsguard oath for me?

My song is only bitterness to sing.

 

Who am I?

Edited by LiveFirstDieLater

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1 hour ago, LiveFirstDieLater said:

Knighted by a prince, drunk down by a king,

I kissed a maid, now decomposing.

Laughed at by a tree,

No Kingsguard oath for me?

My song is only bitterness to sing.

 

Who am I?

Lem

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The lake had that copper beaten sheen

A most quaint and resplendent scene

For the God's Eye's attire

Held colours like fire

Though the island was shimmering green.

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T'was a castle in clouds way up high,

Seems the Eyrie was built in the sky.

There's a beautiful view,

Although everyone knew

Out the Moon Door the bad man will fly. 

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There once was a fellow named Sam,

Who had dreamt of a full leg of lamb.

But when he awoke,

He thought it no joke

As he had to make do with some ham.

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To the Warrior prayed every last soldier,

And the northmen to gods even older.

They'll fight the great war,

With victory unsure.

Whilst the chill winds of winter grow colder. 

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