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LGBTQ+ 6 -- It's a Rainbow of Flavors


Xray the Enforcer
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Be supportive, without making being trans the focal point of every conversation.  If your friend wants to talk about it, okay, but try not to be too curious.

Also, the only person who decides if information about being trans is to be shared, is your friend.  You don't get to make that decision.  Also, if a mutual acquaintance ever comes to you and asks, "Did you know <name> is trans," "Really, I didn't know that," is the best answer.

That said, I might not be the best person to answer your question.  I can't fathom why any trans person chooses to reveal they are trans, especially in the current social/political climate.  So, take my words with a grain of salt.

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On 2/25/2019 at 8:40 AM, The guy from the Vale said:

So... a person who has become a friend over the last two years told me on Friday that they are actually trans. I thanked them for their trust in telling me this and offered my support and care with that information. Still, this is a new experience for me, so if some of the good people of this board have any advice what else I can do for them, that is much appreciated.

It is my experience with those of my kind that they like to talk a lot. It is unbearable but also completely understandable. Most trans folks have kept a large part (too large, in most cases I find) of their personality bottled up for years or decades and are excited to talk it out or explore their feelings with someone other than themselves. 

I can't stand it, personally, but I've also caught myself falling into the trap so I can I think relate with some objectivity the dynamic. 

So if you can handle it, let them talk themselves out. 

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  • 1 month later...
22 minutes ago, Darth Richard II said:

Hahaha, “step” my ass.

Well to many LGBTQ members are who apart of the Mormon Church it is. 

LGBTQ church members and groups that support them expressed relief about what they called an important step forward for the faith. However, they also said they were angry about the harm the 2015 policies had caused and the lack of an apology by church leaders.

It does mean something to them that they’re no longer considered apostates. "It was a stigma. It was like wearing a Scarlet letter," said Nathan Kitchen, a gay Mormon father of five children from Gilbert, Arizona. "You are cut off, you are a pariah.

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  • 1 month later...
6 hours ago, Bittersweet Distractor said:

Well I guess I should share here, I’m marrying my amazing gf of 9 years in July :D, others be warned though, planning a wedding is hard work!.

I had my dress fitting last week and am already so excited for the day!.

Congrats! Hope it’s a lovely day for you both ! 

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10 hours ago, Bittersweet Distractor said:

Well I guess I should share here, I’m marrying my amazing gf of 9 years in July :D, others be warned though, planning a wedding is hard work!.

I had my dress fitting last week and am already so excited for the day!.

That is amazing! Im so happy for you and i imagine any wedding of yours will be kickass. 

 

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5 hours ago, Theda Baratheon said:

Congrats! Hope it’s a lovely day for you both ! 

Thank you :D, I just hope the weather is actually summery and it doesn’t rain!.

I also read your old post last year about the girl at your museum being a complete bitch to you for no reason and hope you’ve managed to get through it :), I just find it odd the hostility some lesbian/gay people have towards bisexuals.

I’ve not had quite that hostility but I have experienced a bit of-you’re not gay enough from some women or unwanted attention from men because I’m a complete femme.

 

1 hour ago, HelenaExMachina said:

That is amazing! Im so happy for you and i imagine any wedding of yours will be kickass. 

 

Thank you, it’s going to be a really special day for everyone coming, but especially for us of course, we’re both going for quite traditional dresses, were also being a bit traditional in that I won’t let her see my dress and she won’t let me see hers before the big day, we still haven’t decided what we’re going to do about last names yet!.

Edited by Bittersweet Distractor
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9 hours ago, Bittersweet Distractor said:

Thank you :D, I just hope the weather is actually summery and it doesn’t rain!.

I also read your old post last year about the girl at your museum being a complete bitch to you for no reason and hope you’ve managed to get through it :), I just find it odd the hostility some lesbian/gay people have towards bisexuals.

I’ve not had quite that hostility but I have experienced a bit of-you’re not gay enough from some women or unwanted attention from men because I’m a complete femme.

 

Thank you, it’s going to be a really special day for everyone coming, but especially for us of course, we’re both going for quite traditional dresses, were also being a bit traditional in that I won’t let her see my dress and she won’t let me see hers before the big day, we still haven’t decided what we’re going to do about last names yet!.

Lots of decisions to make! I know its supposed to be a stressful time but i hope its all worth it :) 

And until you tell me to the contrary, i am going to assume you will be walking down the aisle to the Imperial March

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1 hour ago, HelenaExMachina said:

Lots of decisions to make! I know its supposed to be a stressful time but i hope its all worth it :) 

And until you tell me to the contrary, i am going to assume you will be walking down the aisle to the Imperial March

I’d really love to walk down the aisle to the Imperial March it would be great for me and amusing for our guests, unfortunately the other bride has veteod it :(.

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On 5/26/2019 at 12:07 PM, Bittersweet Distractor said:

I’d really love to walk down the aisle to the Imperial March it would be great for me and amusing for our guests, unfortunately the other bride has veteod it :(.

You sure you want to marry her? 

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I’ve recently stumbled upon this article. I find it to be a sobering reminder that just how fragile LGBTQ issues including gay marriage is in the US, hell even if States could legally ban homosexual acts(Remember Texas v.Lovings literally happened in 2003, and 2 of Trump’s appointees’ comments on it are concerning to say the least) could become subject to contention now. 

https://www.google.com/amp/s/theweek.com/articles-amp/843202/censoring-gay-marriage-tv-could-ominous-sign-things-come

More reason to move out of the country. 

Also, it does highlight a problem that’s being touted among too many people. That homophobia all together no longer is an issue, that gays don’t face massive societal persecution, and that you’d be hard pressed to find a real homophobe.

Such sentiment is quite frankly more dangerous than explicit anti-gay rhetoric given it lulls the public into a sense of undeserved safety. 

Edited by Varysblackfyre321
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Sorry to put a downer on the thread but this came up in my news feed a little while ago.

Really feel ashamed that stuff like this still happens in London, really big tough guys beating up two women coming home from a date, I want to say I hope they change their ways but I feel so angry towards them right now all I can think is I hope they learn a thing or two about unwanted attention from men while they’re in jail.

 

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1 hour ago, Bittersweet Distractor said:

Sorry to put a downer on the thread but this came up in my news feed a little while ago.

Really feel ashamed that stuff like this still happens in London, really big tough guys beating up two women coming home from a date, I want to say I hope they change their ways but I feel so angry towards them right now all I can think is I hope they learn a thing or two about unwanted attention from men while they’re in jail.

 

I'm furious about this.

This is gendered violence from men against women, SPECIFICALLY lesbian women who are not under their sexual control. They still find ways to try to sexualise women and slot them into fetishes or fantasies and when we refuse we're beaten up. It's so disgusting. 

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16 hours ago, Theda Baratheon said:

I'm furious about this.

This is gendered violence from men against women, SPECIFICALLY lesbian women who are not under their sexual control. They still find ways to try to sexualise women and slot them into fetishes or fantasies and when we refuse we're beaten up. It's so disgusting. 

Exactly!, it makes me so angry when stuff like this happens, I’ve experienced some of that attitude from a small minority of guys(trying to flirt or hit on me and when I tell them I’m not into guys sorry, getting oh can I watch etc kind of comments) but nothing like the horrible experience these two unfortunate women suffered.

It’s thankfully only a small minority of men who feel like it’s ok to act this way but that anyone at all thinks this kind of behaviour is acceptable, well it needs to be addressed.

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I saw this too, utterly disgusting. Its so entitled and possessive to think that anyone of any gender or sexuality is there to satisfy your fancies. That aspect is bad enough, but then it was also a deliberate targetting based on sexual orientation. Its just all so reprehensible.

 

I was also sickened by some of the general public where i live too. I was in the pub last night and the story came up on the 10 o clock news. I was just sitting quiet with a friend so we could hear the talk at the bar. I heard the words “its sick.” And thought yes, indeed it is. Only to realise the talk at the bar was around the two ladies being gay. No comments on the attack, purely focused on how “sick” their relationship was.

i wish i could say i’d been brave and challenged that but i wasn’t, i just drank up and left quickly. Times like this are reminders that society has come a long way but there is a long way left to go

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