Doomsday Warrior: The Return of Ted Rockson

[Rorshach]

Oh, my. I hadn’t noticed that these threads were alive again. I pray for your sanity.

Fun fact: of the chess game, every move up to Nf5 is theory - and could be played by a grandmaster, at least in theory. However, I think that theory leads to rather a lot of exchanges and a quite bloodless endgame. Still, until move 5 it could be taken from a chess book. 

And then Stacy shows his ... well, he shows something. 

Wonder if this Chessmaster will show similar skills?

[Maithanet]

19 hours ago, Rorshach said:

Oh, my. I hadn’t noticed that these threads were alive again. I pray for your sanity.
Fun fact: of the chess game, every move up to Nf5 is theory - and could be played by a grandmaster, at least in theory. However, I think that theory leads to rather a lot of exchanges and a quite bloodless endgame. Still, until move 5 it could be taken from a chess book. 

Showing my lack of chess bona fides, what is "theory" in a chess context?

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And then Stacy shows his ... well, he shows something. 

Wonder if this Chessmaster will show similar skills?

I can only hope! 

Although if we're being honest, I hope the story just gets on with it.  Rockson stumbling around in a walking illusion is really dull.  I want my ridiculous monsters and misogynistic heroism! 

[Rorshach]

16 minutes ago, Maithanet said:

Showing my lack of chess bona fides, what is "theory" in a chess context?

Theory in chess simply means «played before at a high level». Mostly, it’s also restricted to «played before more than a few times». 

Those known lines (played before) can at worst run up to around 20 moves. Those are not the most interesting games to watch

[Maithanet]

3 minutes ago, Rorshach said:

Theory in chess simply means «played before at a high level». Mostly, it’s also restricted to «played before more than a few times». 

Those known lines (played before) can at worst run up to around 20 moves. Those are not the most interesting games to watch

Thanks!  I can see why those would not be fan favorites.

[Maithanet]

When we left our hero, he was trapped in dullsville Bizzaro Salt Lake City with his "wife" Kim and "family".  Yes, Rockson has encountered an attractive female character, and you know what that means!  It's sex scene time.

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Just lie back, dear.  You remember what the Chessman says about sex.  It's the woman's job.

The writing of the sex scene is every bit as awful as MinDonner led us all to believe.  At one point there's a reference to Kim's "blonde triangle", which seems like something I might have come up with if I were describing sex prior to ever actually being naked with a woman.  

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The probing shaft slid in and out between the opened petals of flesh.  She rolled her eyes, rocked her head back and forth on the pillow.  The bed set up some sort of obscene rhythm underneath them.

What do you think an obscene rhythm is?  Google has exactly 206 results for that phrase, and a quick scan looks like it's primarily bad erotica.  So I'll give Ryder Stacy credit for originality.

Then Rock goes to sleep, and we are subject to a dream sequence within a hallucination.  I was hoping this dream sequence could also feature a flashback, but no dice.  It's the typical dream sequence of Rock trying to warn himself about the dangers of Bizzaro Salt Lake City.  It ends with Rock running from the Chessman's goons, armed with flamethrowers.  But he's trapped in place by a vision of a beautiful blonde woman.  WHAT COULD IT MEAN.

The next morning we're subject to an internal monologue from Kim worrying about her husband:

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He seemed to be hallucinating.  Poor teddy!  Was he going insane? Such things did happen.  And would would become of her and the children if Teddy was put away?  

She resolved to act normal.  Teddy would come around and return to his usual self.  Except for one thing;  He had mysteriously become a great lover.  She hoped that change would endure!

First of all

Also, isn't this Kim just a figment of Rock's imagination?  Where is this monologue even coming from?  

Up Next:  Rock heads to work and meets still more imaginary characters, including everyone's favorite acrobat/amazon/freedom fighter Rona!  Anyone want to guess what her profession is here in Bizzaro Salt Lake City?  I'll give you a hint: you probably only need one guess. 

[maarsen]

Maithanet, I have to thank you for falling on the grenade, metaphorically speaking, for the rest of us. I can't count the times I have seen this type of drivel on bookstore shelves while needing a fantasy or sf fix in the worst way. Stay strong.