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Outrageous Lies About the Previous Poster, #25: Only the Biggest, Juiciest WHOPPERS!


honeyed chicken

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For many people, iced coffee is a summer drink. Not so for Joy. She drinks hot coffee when it's hot outside, and iced coffee in January when it's frigid. In the shoulder seasons? Then she likes it tepid. She may be the only person on earth who walks into Starbucks and orders a hot coffee, but "add three ice cubes, please."

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3 hours ago, Raisin' Bran said:

When HC first cracked his copy of A Game of Thrones, he thought it was somehow about a championship game of Musical Chairs.

I would totally play that game.

 

RB is actually made of raisins.  He's squishy in the middle.

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HC has founded a bizarre honeyed-chicken-worshipping cult. No one in his house may ever leave it, and they must all prostrate themselves on the floor before a plateful of chicken dipped in honey, and cry out "ALL GLORY UNTO THE SACRED HONEYED GALINACEOUS ONE!!!!!!" Any who seem to lack conviction in yelling this prayer are hit on the head with said chicken.

Stay away!

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8 hours ago, Knight of Ashes said:

The Count is bitter 'cause he didn't get picked to wear the Victoria's Secret Fantasy Bra this year.

Hey, I'd totally wear that thing . . . NOT!

 

It can now be announced (since the election is over) that KoA has been named by President Trump the official White House toilet paper roll changer. It is a prestigious office as the last two holders (Paul Ryan and John Boehner) went on to become Speakers of the House of Representatives

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I tried, I did.  But alas, it was not the dragons of Valyria, but the Count of Balerion.  There was a vague dragon connection, but ultimately the truth was uncovered.  Count Balerion had created a secret underground network that promised users that they were mining for bitcoin, when in fact they were helping to count all the votes.  Their interference could have saved democracy.  They were unsuccessful in their mission.  They were foiled by tainted gummy bears.

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Never one to lie, when Ivana Trump asked KoA if her ex wasn't, "the world's biggest poopyhead, Dahling?" he had to agree. And that would have been fine if The Donald and his bodyguards hadn't been standing behind KoA at the time. Days later KoA was still trying to wash the smell of all that suntan lotion out of his hair.

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